Opening Your Eyes
by Hulio
Summary: There's a fine line between love and hate. Lily Evan's has been blinded by hatred, unable to look past it, however James Potter, with the help of the Marauder's and Marlene McKinnon, intends to help open her eyes to the different person that he has become.
1. Chapter 1

_**Monday, September 1**__**st**_

'Be sure to write' warned her mother, pulling her in for another hug. Tears threatening at her eyes.

Lily nodded, 'I promise' she said turning towards her father, who was staring at her baring a watery smile.

He opened his arms up wide for her and she was quick to run into him. He kissed her forehead, still a head taller than her, even if her loafers had a small heal. 'My Little Lily-Flower,' he mumbled, 'All grown up. It seemed just like yesterday you were getting your letter to Hogwarts, it was so strange to you back then, but now it's as if this Hogwarts place, is home for you' She shook her head, however he continued, 'No matter where you go off to once you finally finish your last year, no matter who you meet, you must always promise me to return to us, to your childhood home'

'I swear I will' she replied, pulling him back into a hug.

'Now get out of here' he said, pushing back from her. 'You best be getting through that wall, wouldn't want our head girl to be late now would we?'

'He's right love' added her mother, 'Go on. Have a wonderful year and we'll see you come Christmas time'

Lily put both hands on her trolley, and angled it perfectly at the barrier, separating them from the Muggle and Magical world. 'I'll write to you the moment I get settled.' she assured them. Before turning towards the brick wall, waving over her shoulder as she ran towards it. Looking over her shoulder at the last second and catching a glimpse of her parents, smiling and waving happily, both a little teary.

Suddenly she felt a slight pull and the station appeared in front of her. The bright red train, steaming wildly, adding a magical effect to the platform. Lily, absolutely beaming, her head girl badge shining proudly upon her t-shirt, pushed her cart over towards one of the doors. 'Good morning Albert,' she greeted cheerfully, as he lifted her trunk off her trolley onto the train.

He tipped his hat to her in reply, 'And how are you today, Ms. Evan's?'

'I'm very well thanks, couldn't be anything but on this fine day' she replied, her head girl badge catching a ray of sunlight.

'Fine day indeed' he agreed. 'Now go on, don't stand here chatting with an old man like me when I know your friends are just dying to see you. Marlene McKinnon could barely contain herself'

Lily smiled in reply, 'Have a wonderful day Albert' Lily added, before turning her back on the old man and continuing into the crowd.

'Oh and Ms. Evan's' he cried after her, 'Congratulations on making Head Girl, perfect for the job you are'

XxX

She searched the crowd wildly for her friends, however as the platform began to get more and more busy she started to feel slightly discouraged, and reasoned with herself that it would be easier to just find their compartment as everyone boarded. However before she had any further thoughts her vision was blurred by a mass of long, blond hair.

'Lily!' the person the hair belonged to had cried.

Without hesitation Lily hugged the girl back, 'Marlene' she replied, 'Where in Merlin's pants have you been? I've been looking all over the platform!'

'I've been looking for you of course' she claimed, stepping back from her. 'So how's your summer been? You have to tell me everything!'

Lily rolled her eyes in response. 'Come on,' she answered, 'Let's get a compartment before they all fill up' The two girl's linked arms and made their way over towards the train. Talking and laughing wildly, causing some parents to turn and stare in their direction. Each girl, entire too absorbed in their conversation to watch where they were going, bumped right into two rather tall boys.

'Sorry' mumbled Lily, her gaze dropping to the floor, as Marlene snickered beside her.

'Honestly Evan's' started the all to familiar voice, 'I thought the Head Girl would be a little more careful'

Lily rolled her eyes in response, standing on the tips of her toes and pulling the tall, shaggy haired boy into a hug. 'Black, haven't I already told you countless times to bloody call me by my first name'

'Everyone calls you by your first name,' Sirius replied, 'I want to be different'

She shook her head in reply, turning to Remus and pulling him into a hug as well. 'Rem' she started, 'How are you? How was your summer'

He smiled down at her, 'Just brilliant, how about you?'

'Good' she answered, as Sirius and Marlene whispered alongside them. 'But I can't help but wonder Rem.. There's no Head Boy badge on your robs..'

'I didn't get it' he said, with a shrug, 'Although I am this years prefect'

Silence fell over the two, as the train whistle blew. 'We better get on' shouted Remus to both Marlene and Sirius over the noise of the station. 'I will see you in a few minutes, in the first compartment for the prefect meeting' he added before following the other two into the crowd.

'But if you're not Head Boy!' shouted Lily after him, 'Then who is!'

The train pulled out of the station and slowly started to pick up speed as Lily, walked carefully towards the front of the train. Feeling slightly nervous after discovering that she wouldn't be working alongside one of her best mates. Slowly she edged closer towards the compartment, taking deep breaths. She pushed the door open, it already been cracked and stepping into the much larger compartment in which she had been in the previous year, however only as a Prefect.

The tall boy in the corner of the room caught her eye, and she made her way over towards him, a smile on her face. 'Hello, I'm Lily Evan's, the Head Girl'

'Honestly' muttered the boy, looking up to meet her, 'You think I don't already know that'

She instantly dropped her extended hand, placing both of hers on her hips. 'Now Potter, don't you think this is just a little too early in the year for practical jokes. We haven't even gotten to Hogwarts yet.'

'Now come on Lily,' James argued in a playful tone, 'Don't be daft, I have the badge, I'm in the room, on time I might add. And besides, why would I even pretend to be Head Boy when I had no interest to begin with'

She felt herself sway on her feet, not able to fully comprehend that a great wizard like Dumbledore could make such a decision at this. 'Here' James continued, grabbing onto her shoulders to steady her, then leading her over towards the nearest chair. 'Why don't you take a seat'

She nodded and sat down, resting her elbows on her knees and rubbing her temples. 'I just.. Why.. I.. What..?'

'Funny, those were the exact words Sirius used' Lily chuckled in response, much to his surprise, 'Did you just laugh.. at one of _my_ jokes?'

Lily froze in her seat, 'I'm going mad' she whispered to herself.

'So let me get this straight, you're okay with the fact that I'm Head Boy _and_ you just laughed at one of my jokes. Bloody hell, I need to sit down' James announced, pulling up a chair beside Lily's for himself. And as they sat in silence Lily couldn't help but steal a few glaces at the Head Boy, watching him as he continued to stare at the ground_. _Lily observed him as he bit his lip slightly and nervously tapped his foot. If she didn't know any better, she would've thought, that in that moment, _and this moment only_,_ she told herself,_ he actually looked quite cute.

'Potter' she stated calmly, however was interrupted as the Prefect's from various different years and houses started to pile into the compartment. He stood however, putting the chair back from where he had taken it and proceeding to do the same to Lily's.

'If we're going to be working together,' he started, 'You might want to call me by my first name'

'And what is your first name?' she joked, following him into the middle of the room.

He sighed, shaking his head, a small smile playing at his lips. 'Looks like everyone's here, we better get on with this' Lily nodded in agreement, turning her attention to the multiple people in front of them.

XxX

The whole meeting passed in a blur and she watched, completely mesmerized, as James Potter took charge and actually kept the Prefect's attention as they both droned on about the boring duties that came along with being Prefect's. It had seemed as if right before her eyes, James had transformed. No longer the arrogant, pranking Marauder, but now a wonderful, responsible, kind of cute, Head Boy. The meeting was soon over, they answered a few questioned and after quickly briefing the two fifth years on the corridor patrol while on the train, they dismissed the group.

'Well, that wasn't half bad' James began.

'You were brilliant' Lily commented, making her way over towards the door, James following close behind.

'Do you really think so?' he asked, running a hand through his hair. To which Lily simply nodded in reply, dodging the various students and the candy trolley as they both made their way back to the compartment.

She was just about to make an attempt at starting a conversation between the two of them however she heard someone further down the hall calling her name, and whirled around to see Amos Diggory walking towards them.

'Lily' he cried for the second time, pushing right past James and pulling her into a hug. 'How are you! How was your summer?'

'I'm very well and my summer was the same, what about you?'

He shrugged, 'Pretty good, although I can't say I wasn't surprised when I didn't receive a Head Boy badge along with my Hogwarts letter this year. My parents were simply shocked, both absolutely certain that I was going to get it' Lily nodded, 'I'm really proud of you though, being Head Girl, that's a big honour. Although there was no doubt that it was going to be you, the other girl's didn't stand a chance.'

'We must catch up' she insisted, 'But I really have to be getting back to my compartment'

Amos nodded in agreement, 'Shame it was Potter though, I would hate to have to work with him all year'

Lily glanced around for James however he was nowhere in sight, 'I don't know' she concluded, 'He seems like he might actually be good at it'

'I doubt that' Amos called over his shoulder before disappearing into his compartment.

She continued down the corridor by herself and slide open the compartment door after finding the one with both Marlene and all four of the Marauder's. 'So this is where you ran off too' Lily said, eyeing James as she plopped herself down on the floor in the compartment, leaning up against Marlene's legs.

'Well you were talking to Diggory' he replied, 'And I didn't really fancy hanging around for that'

'It wasn't like we were talking about anything important' she continued, however everyone in the compartment shared a look then all turned towards her.

'Oh come on Lily' laughed Marlene, 'He's absolutely smitten with you'

She appeared to be thinking about it for a moment, however she quickly shook her head. 'He's not' she countered, 'We're just friends, that's all we've ever been and that's all we're ever going to be. He's not my type'

Sirius rolled his eyes in response, 'You have a type?' he joked.

'Yeah' she playfully countered 'Unlike you, who just snogs anything in a skirt'

'I have a type!' he cried in defence.

Lily rolled her eyes 'After all the girls you've been with and whom you have completely broken, I just assumed as much'

'Oh please' he retorted 'It's not like you and I are much different Evans'

'Padfoot' warned James, as everyone in the compartment just sat in silence as the once playful conversation slowly started to unravel the truth. 'Stop, please stop'

Although pretending as if he hadn't heard James, Sirius continued 'I might break a different girl's heart every week, but you've broken my mate's heart everyday for the past five years! You probably wouldn't know what that feels like since you don't even have a heart to begin with, if you had you would give Prongs a chance!'

Lily stared open mouthed at Sirius 'You know what, you're right Evan's, we're not even close to being the same person, you are much worse than I am.' She didn't see the look of surprise and horror on Remus' face, the look of confusion on Peter's or even the slight embarrassment on James' for she instantly looked at the ground. Their compartment filling with tension. Quickly their was a game of exploding snap that was started and the tension melted away, however are the four Marauder's competed rather loudly, Lily had moved up onto the seat and was staring out the window, while Marlene eyed her across the compartment.

They had all gotten into their Hogwarts robs as they neared the station, and proceeded to file out of them compartment as the train slowed to a stop. Lily quickly making her way off the train onto the platform, James having to almost run to keep up with her.

'You know, Sirius didn't mean what he said' James pointed out after catching up to her. 'He had just seen his family, and well, he always gets a little angry when he does. He usually takes out his anger on me, but this time it was you and I'm sorry for that'

Lily nodded, 'Really, it's fine' she assured him, putting a smile on her face to prove her point. However, even as she smiled, the words Sirius had recently said to her wouldn't stop ringing through her mind. However she put on a smile none-the-less, ushering the first years towards a very friendly face.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Tuesday, September 2nd_**

Lily was seated at what had be rightfully clammed her table in the library back in fifth year when she had spent most of her time there studying or reading. She felt relaxed and calm among the books, they held so much, the possibilities were endless, you could be learning how to brew a particular difficult potion to reading about to latest news on Cleansweeps or the top ten most beautiful wizards.

The library was her sanctuary, her not-so-secret pleasure. Sure everyone that knew her thought she was a loser, spending that much time in a room full of books can be considered unhealthy to some people, however it didn't matter to her what they said. She had to be the best, and would do whatever it took.

'Isn't it a little early to be in the library Evans?' asked the all to familiar voice,

She didn't even bother looking up from her favourite Jane Austin novel, she knew James Potter was standing in front of her, trying to make conversation, _probably here to ask me out_, she thought. 'What is it Potter?' she asked kindly, turning to the next page in her book.

'You know dinner started an hour ago?' he questioned, plopping himself down across from her.

She nodded, only half listening 'Yes, I'm aware, I ate earlier' she could feel him staring at her, she was used to it by now sure, but today it felt weird, it felt different. She sighed, closing her book and placing it in her bag, 'If you only came here to stare at me, I would prefer if you did it from over there' she stated, plainly, pointing to a bunch of comfortable chairs on the other side of a book case.

He dropped his gaze to the table, 'I'm sorry Lily' he whispered 'He didn't mean it I promise you, seeing his family just tends to strike a nerve with him'

She shrugged it off, like it didn't matter 'As I told you yesterday James, it's fine, really' she reasoned, standing from the table, 'I have to go though, talk to you later'

However within seconds, James was on his feet already catching up with her. 'You're right, you have to go, with me though' he replied, grabbing her wrist. She gazed up at him, shocked, then proceeded to yank her hand from his grip.

Lily tried and failed to retrieve her arm from her grasp. 'And where, might I ask, do I _need_ to go with you?'

He chuckled lightly, dropping her hand. 'You don't have to come I guess, It's just Dumbledore wants to speak with the Head Boy _and Girl_' he finished, speeding up his pace and leaving her behind.

'Wait' she cried to his retreating back.

He stopped and turned to face her innocently raising his eyebrows 'What is it?' he questioned, playfully.

Lily sighed, fixing the strap of her bag on her shoulder and following him down the corridor. 'Alright let's go' she stated, as the two marched down the hall towards the head master's office.

* * *

><p>'Oh good' said Dumbledore, the same sparkle in his eyes as always, as both Lily and James entered his office 'I'm glad was able to find you '<p>

Lily smiled kindly 'It was no trouble' responded James, also beaming.

'Please sit' he ushered them, to which they both nodded and took the two chairs in front of his desk. 'Now I'm sure you're wondering why I've called you here, don't worry your not in trouble'

'Honestly Headmaster, why in the world would we be in trouble, we haven't even done anything' replied James, turning to Lily and winking, whispered a small 'Yet' under his breath.

Dumbledore chuckled lightly, 'Of course you haven't' he agreed 'However I've called you here on a matter of importance' both Lily and James, leaned forwards in their chairs, very content on hearing what their head master had to say 'As you might know already, the Head Boy and Girl get their separate tower, away from the other students'

They nodded excitedly 'It is now that I will show you where the secret common room is located,' he stated rising from his chair and walking around his desk towards the door 'If you would please follow me'

Both Lily and James, nodded then rose from their chairs, sending each other small excited smiles before quickly walking after the Headmaster. They passed the Gryffindor common room, and kept on climbing stairs before finally turning down a narrow corridor to come to a medium sized portrait that was just a blank frame.

'Welcome' Dumbledore said, joyfully 'To your Head's common room'

Both James and Lily looked at their Headmaster, excitement plastered all over their faces. 'All we have to do is set a password? Right Professor?' asked Lily, curiously tracing the lining of the portrait with her finger.

The Headmaster smiled down at her, 'Right you are Ms. Evan's' he agreed, 'Well, I really must be going' he admitted

'But Professor?' questioned James 'Aren't you going to come with us?'

Dumbledore chuckled lightly 'No , this is an adventure that you have to go on by yourselves' he stated, turning down the corridor and proceeding to walk away. 'Oh before I forget, Minerva asked me to remind you that she needs a patrol schedule by Friday'

They both nodded, thanking his retreating back.

'So, lets get cracking' stated James turning to Lily, who was still staring at the portrait in awe 'What should the password be?' She shrugged, a smile creeping onto her face and finally tearing her eyes away from the portrait to James 'What's got you smiling like that?' he questioned

Lily sighed happily, 'It's unbelievable, I can't believe it's actually happening, I'm actually Head Girl'

James also smiled 'Of course you are, there was never any doubt'

'Thanks' she murmered quietly 'And as for the password I have no idea'

They both laughed lightly 'Well how about Mooncalf?' questioned James

Lily thought about it for a few moments, before another grin grew across her face 'Yeah, that sounds terrific!' she replied pulling out her wand and muttering the correct spells before setting the password. James watched in awe as she performed the simple charms with such ease.

'Wow' he stated in admiration 'You're really talented'

She shrugged off the complement 'It's just simple charms work' she replied stepping back from the portrait and beaming. 'It's done'

They both stood in silence, staring at the portrait, both unable to believe they were about to enter their common room, the Head's common room. 'Shall I do the honours?' questioned James

She nodded her head and watched him as he stated the password and the portrait swung open, a smile never leaving her face. James ushered Lily to pass through into the common room first, which she did without a second thought.

A small gasp filled the common room as both Lily and James stood in awe. To a regular student, without a highly important title, the Head's common room wouldn't have looked much different then the other ones. After all it was basically just a smaller Gryffindor common room, it still held the same chairs, the same tables, the same two staircases on either side separating boys from girls, the same roaring fire place that never failed to burn brightly. However it meant more to the both of them.

To Lily, it meant that she had finally done it, she had finally proven to the wizarding world that blood status meant nothing, she could do whatever she set out to do in life. Nothing could stop her, she was invincible. Lily was done with being treated badly, this position granted her with respect from other students, maybe even the Slyterins, and responsibility, knowing that she could achieve a task no matter how difficult it was.

To James, it meant he would finally be taken more seriously. Sure, he loved the pranks, he loved sneaking out late with his fellow Marauders, he wouldn't trade that life for anything. Though, he was changing, last year he started to actually try in school and stopped hexing people for the fun of it, he joked that Remus' good reason finally got to him if it ever came up. But it was more than that, his Marauder's knew it as well, it was all for her. The common room meant spending more time with her, maybe even some time when they aren't at each others throats, he could get to know her, and she him. It gave him the slightest bit of hope that she had noticed his change, that one day she would love him back.

'Bloody hell' stated James after a few moments of silence.

Lily nodded in agreement 'It's wonderful isn't it'

'Well' he replied, turning his gaze towards her 'I don't know about you, but I can't wait to see the rest of it'

Her smile, if possible, grew even bigger, and with a quick nod she raced up the staircase in which she was sure her dorm would be. James doing the same on the other side.

Upon reaching the doors, both Head's hesitated, each taking a deep breath before carefully turning the nob and swinging the door open. Their dorms were the same as their old ones, however instead of there being four of everything, there was simply just one.

After a few moments James had launched himself onto his bed, taking in a deep breath and relaxing. Until his door suddenly burst open and in came Lily. 'Look' she stated walking over to his window 'Look at this view, we must be in the tallest tower'

'No my dear' he stated in a-matter-of-fact kind of way, coming to her side 'The tallest tower would be the astronomy tower, this is most likely the second or even third tallest' She punched him playfully in the arm, and even chuckled lightly at James fake pained expression. Then turned her gaze once more to the opened window, watching closely as purples, pinks and oranges shown brightly across the sky as the sun slowly faded away. 'I could get used to this' said James.

Lily nodded her agreement, 'Yeah, I mean your view is pretty great' she started 'However mine is better, you can see the Black lake out my window. All you see is the greenhouses and the forbidden forest'

He rolled his eyes in response, proceeding to walk out of his dorm 'Well, I'll just have to be the judge of that' he finished, later deciding that she indeed did have the better view. She smiled and ran out after him, muttering the whole way about how fantastic the tower was and he couldn't help but agree.

* * *

><p>'Prongs mate you ready!' shouted Sirius upon entering the Head's common room, followed by Remus and Peter.<p>

'Yeah' a voice responded from the second floor 'I'll be down in a minute'

The three boys stood awkwardly in the middle of the room, until Lily let out a small chuckle from the chair across from the fire. 'You know you three could sit down right?' she questioned lightly, causing all three boys to jump.

'For the sake of Merlin' whispered Sirius through gasps of air, 'You just about scared the living hell outta me'

She smiled as the three boys walked towards her and all took their usual seats. 'So what do you four have planned?' she asked

Peter made to respond however Sirius cut him off, 'You can't tell her!' he stated 'It's a Marauder's secret!'

Remus rolled his eyes 'Honestly...' he sighed, shaking his head. Silence fell among the group once again and lingered for a few moments before Remus spoke again, leaning closer to Lily. 'What are you working on?' he questioned, peering over her shoulder.

'This months patrol schedule' Lily responded, turning to look at him 'I'm going to put you on patrols with Mary alright?'

He sheepishly nodded his agreement, just as James came bounding down the stairs into the common room. 'Alright' he said 'Let's go'

'Do you have the cloak?' questioned Sirius, to which James nodded after patting his jeans pocket.

'And the map?' added Remus

'And the whis-' started Peter, however he was cut off by a sharp elbow to the ribs by Remus and a glare from both James and Sirius.

Lily eyed them curiously and all four of the boys waited nervously for her to say something. She inwardly sighed and stood from the chair, placing the patrolling schedule on the coffee table before walking towards the four Marauders. 'I'm-' she started

'Lily we can explain' interrupted James, however she just rolled her eyes in response.

'I'm going to bed' she finished, and smiled to herself as Sirius and Remus glared at James while he hung his head in embarrassment. 'Don't stay up to late, we do start classes tomorrow after all'

The all nodded at her retreating back as it climbed the stairs. 'Nice going Prongs' muttered Sirius 'Honestly what were you thinking...?'

Remus rolled his eyes 'Oh please, Padfoot you were about a second in from caving yourself'

'At least she didn't figure it out' added Peter as all four boys proceeded towards the portrait hole, James pulling out the cloak from his pocket on the way.

Suddenly there was a cry from upstairs causing all four of them to jump and have the cloak slide off of them. 'Oh and Potter' Lily called down the stairs 'Expect no sympathy from me when you come back tomorrow morning'

All four Marauder's stood their frozen, before James head dropped in defeat. 'What did she mean by that?' questioned Peter, the three others groaned in reply and exited the common room.

'It means that she knows Pete' replied Remus as the portrait hole swung shut behind them.

'Alright mates' stated Sirius proudly as he passed around the glasses. 'To seventh year' he cried raising his glass

'To Marauding' added James

'To love and friendship' chimed in Peter

'To working hard' said Remus

All three boys glared at him and groaned 'Awe Moony, why'd you have to go and add that' demanded Sirius 'Now we might actually have to do our homework' he finished a smile creeping onto his face.

James stared at him wide-eyed, and Peter's mouth hung open, the three of them were just about to share a worried glance before Sirius burst into laughter 'Sweet Merlin, I can't even say that with a straight face' he said through gasps of air 'To Marlene Mckinnon's shorter skirts!'

'That's more like it' murmured Remus, rolling his eyes in the process

'To finally getting Evan's to date me' cried James, causing all three boys to look at him skeptically. 'Honestly' he replied with a shrug 'This is the year, I just know it'

'To-' started Peter, however Sirius cut him off

'Bloody hell,' he whispered 'Can we drink already'

All four boys laughed, clinking their glasses together, wincing as the fire whisky burned their throats and smiling mischievously as their judgment became a little more hazy.


	3. Chapter 3

**_Wednesday, September 3rd_**

The next morning James woke, cursing himself as he sprung up into a sitting position only to fall over because of the extreme throbbing in his head, he had long gotten over the nausea and dizziness from previous drinking nights, however the headache never failed to arrive the mornings after, always worse than the last in his opinion.

For the second time again, he rose into a sitting position, much slower than the last and finally reaching success. He reached for his bedside table, eyes still closed, left hand still clutching his forehead, in search for his glasses. In one fatal swoop he heard the annoying _thunk_ of his glasses falling off the table and making contact with the floor.

Groaning he opened his eyes, and swung his legs around the side of his bed, placing his feet on the ground. Within seconds of having both feet on the ground, he heard the unfaithful sound he had always dreaded, and through the blurriness of the ground, he could vaguely make out the broken pieces of his glasses on the ground next to his foot.

Suddenly, to James' surprise and displeasure, laughter filled the room. He turned, squinting through his eyes to make out the large figure of his best mate sitting up on his bed. 'For the sake of Merlin, you couldn't have helped me?' growled James

Sirius shrugged in response, 'Honestly mate, it was more fun to watch'

James rolled his eyes and picked up the remained of his glasses, 'Do a bloke a favour a fix these, would you'

Sirius sighed and proceeded to slowly get up from his bed, snatching his wand of his bedside table and walking towards James. '_Oculus Reparo_' he muttered causing James' glasses to magically mend themselves.

'Thanks mate' he responded, shoving them onto his face, before groaning and clutching his head once more.

Sirius chuckled lightly at the state of his best friend, 'My my' he sighed 'This certainly isn't your day Prongs'

'Padfoot' he growled 'I'm not in the mood'

'Well certainly not a good one' retorted Sirius, figuring his wand in his hand.

James shook his head 'How do you do it?' he demanded 'You drank the most out of the three of us yet you remain as sober as a first year'

Sirius just shrugged 'It's one of my many good qualities I suppose'

'Pads' asked James lightly as he had to grab onto his bedpost to steady himself, _maybe the dizziness hasn't quite warn off _he thought 'Would you please do that bloody charm already'

His mate looked at him with a faked confused expression 'Why, whatever are you talking about Pronsy?'

'Pads' growled James 'If you don't do that charm within the next ten seconds I will hex off your ability to have children'

Sirius rolled his eyes, pointing his wand in James' direction and muttering a quick sobering charm. 'Honestly Prongs' he started as James got over the slight shock from the spell 'You really need to work on your threats, you know that I don't want children, I'm perfectly happy shagging random girls for the rest of my life'

James chuckled lightly 'Moony and Pete might believe that, I however know that you don't mind the idea of finding yourself a nice bird and settling down'

He stared at his friend in horror, 'I swear Prongs, if you ever tell anyone that' he whispered threateningly

James smirked 'Whatcha going to do Pads?' he interrupted

'Let's just say, I could permanently ruin your chances with Evan's'

'You wouldn't' demanded James

Sirius smiled mischievously 'Oh but I would' he stated proudly 'I could tell her you sing in the shower, or snore, or maybe even about that secret photo album you have under your bed only filled with pictures of her'

James' eyes widened in horror as Sirius continued to ramble on about the horribly embarrassing thing he could tell Lily Evan's when a sudden thought struck him. Smirking slightly he grabbed his wand off his bedside table and pointed it at Sirius casting a silencing charm on him and bursting into laughter at the sight of his best mates facial reaction.

There were tears in his eyes as he watched Sirius angrily pull his wand out, pointing threateningly in his direction. James watched with raised eyebrows as his best mate attempted to cast non-verbal spells in his direction, after having to grab onto the bedpost once more to keep from doubling over in laughter he briefly saw a mischievous glint in Sirius' eyes. However before James could question it, a spell was flying towards him and without warning he was hoisted into the air by his ankles.

'Alright' started James, 'That was bloody brilliant, non-verbal, I didn't think you had it in you' Sirius beamed and bowed for his best mate, who applauded him proudly. 'How did you manage that?' he questioned.

Sirius shrugged in response sending James an exasperated look 'Here's the deal mate, I'll take off that silencing charm if you take whatever spell you put on me off'

James rose his wand upon receiving an agreeable nod from Sirius, who couldn't help but smirk at his best mate suspended upside down in mid-air. 'Now if you would be so kind to uphold you end of the deal' started James however stopped abruptly upon seeing Sirius' sheepish smile. 'Sirius' he growled 'What is it?'

'Well you see mate, I don't actually know the counter curse'

James' eyes darkened 'What are you on about?'

'I heard Snivellus cast it on a first year sometime last year, so over the summer I practised it on my parents but never succeeded to cast it non-verbally until now'

He nodded, 'Padfoot, what's the spell anyway?'

'Levicorpus' responded Sirius, hanging his head in defeat

James slowly pointed his wand at his best mate, planning to get him back for getting him stuck upside down, he whispered a stinging jinx and watched happily as if flew towards an unsuspecting Sirius. However just as it was about to make contact with Sirius' face he dove to the side, taking cover behind his bed. 'Oi Prongs!' he shouted 'If you want to get me back you're going to do better than that'

He smiled mischievously in response, before firing another spell and hearing Sirius yelp in pain as he was knocked backwards into his bedside table, _maybe being up here isn't such a bad thing after all _thought James as he watched Sirius slowly start to stand.

Jinxes were fired between the two boys, both missing their targets. Sirius having been blinded by receiving a particularly nasty jinx and James being suspended by the ceiling the two boys were at a disadvantage.

'Levicorpus' shouted James, the spells heading right towards his best mate, however he reactive instinctively and quickly cast a shield charm, making James jinx bounce right off him and head in the direction of one of the other sleeping boys in the room.

Suddenly there was a yelp of surprise as Remus was forced into the air by his ankles, instinctively taking his wand with him, joining James suspended upside down. He stared angrily at his best mates, crossing his arms over his chest. 'Moony!' cried James, in attempt to ask surprised 'Good morning!'

He growled in response, 'Moony?' questioned Sirius 'Wait what happened?' he demanded still unable to see.

James laughed lightly muttering the counter-jinx and watching in amusement as Sirius' eyes went from surprised to see now two of his best mates hanging upside down to scared from the look of pure hatred Remus was giving him.

'What?' he demanded 'Are the bloody hell you two doing?'

They both shrugged in reply 'Well you see Moony, that's quite a long story'

Suddenly Remus' hands flew to his head and he moaned in pain, causing both James and Sirius to smirk, 'Oh looky here Prongsy' started Sirius in a mocking tone 'Mr. Perfect Prefect here has a hang over'

'Yeah, he looks real hung up doesn't he Padfoot?' questioned James, a moment of silence passed between the three boys, in which Remus rolled his eyes, before both James and Sirius burst into laughter.

'Would you two stop making noise' cried Remus 'Or at least cast that sobering charm'

They both wiped tears from their eyes before nodding their agreement, and which seconds Remus felt his headache and dizziness slowly fade away. James and Sirius grinned at him sheepishly and before either could react he cast a quick Langlock jinx on the pair of them, causing their tongues to be glued to the roves of their mouths.

They both attempted to argue in response however the only sounds that came out of their mouths were muffled, uncomprehending words. Remus then pointing his wand towards Peter's sleeping figure. Casting a spell and watching as his best mate was doused with water.

'Argggg!' groaned Peter, 'What's going on?'

'Pete!' demanded Remus 'I need you to get up and go find Lily, then bring her back here'

'Can't this wait?' he retorted 'Honestly, my head is pounding'

Remus rolled his eyes in response before casting a sobering charm, 'Now go already' Upon seeing the situation at hand, Peter rose quickly from his bed and ran out the door.

Lily's light laughter filled the room when she first walked in. She watched as an upside down James, glared at an upside down Remus and an angry Sirius sat perched upon the end of his bed. 'Lily' asked Remus, rubbing his temples, _it's way too early for this, _he thought bitterly 'Would you please stop laughing and just get us down?'

She grabbed Sirius' bedpost to steady herself and nodded, 'What spell did they use?' she questioned, pulling her wand from her pocket.

Remus' eyes widened as he didn't know the answer, having been asleep when it was cast. Lily, upon seeing his face, shook her head, smiling to herself. Then she pointed her wand at Sirius, unsticking his tongue.

'Thank Merlin!' he cried, getting up and pulling Lily into a bear hug, 'My tongue was starting to cramp up, Lily your amazing! I could kiss you right now!' however with a disapproving growl from James, Sirius quickly put her down, 'But I wouldn't...' he trailed off.

Lily beamed, 'Sirius' she asked, amused 'What spell did you use to get them stuck like that?'

'Levicorpus' he stated proudly,

Her eyes widened 'Where did you hear that?' she demanded

'From Snape, he cast it on a first year once, I wanted to see what it did'

'Don't' she threatened 'Ever use a spell you hear from him ever again, alright?'

'But why?'

Lily shot him an angry look causing Sirius to sigh and then nod, slightly frightened. 'Good' she replied turning towards Remus and James, 'Alright, well prepare yourselves'

They both nodded and she pointed her wand at James first, '_Liberacorpus_' she muttered, and watched in amusement as James fell, with great force towards the ground, landing with a big _thud. _She then turned to Remus, proceeding to do the same, and watching as it had the same result. Both her and Sirius chuckled under their breaths as both boys groaned in pain before slowly making their way to their feet.

'Honestly you couldn't have let us down slowly' argued Remus, rubbing his head.

James made a muffled attempt at agreeing however all that came out of his mouth were a bunch of gurgling sounds. Only causing more laughter from Sirius and Lily.

Lily made a grab for Sirius' bed post to once more steady herself, however missed it causing her to fall right to the ground, landing on her butt with a small _thud_. The room fell silent, except for Peter's small snoring sounds, as all three boys stared at her in shock before all four of them dissolved into uncontrollable laughter. Ending up with all of them literally rolling around on the boys dormitory floor, incapable of stopping.

Suddenly there bedroom door burst open and in stormed a very angry Marlene McKinnon. 'Would you four shut up!' she demanded, however her angry demeanour faded upon seeing Lily lying among the three boys staring up at her from the ground. 'Lily?' she questioned

Quickly Lily rose and dusted herself off, muttering something about it being a ridiculously long story. The three boys soon followed, standing from the ground and getting in a very confusing and heated argument that involved James attempt at trying to convince the others to take the charm off.

'Well' stated Marlene, loud enough to catch the attention of everyone in the room, minus a sleeping Peter's, who's quiet snoring had now become louder and more obnoxious. 'Obviously I've missed something here, so you're going to have to fill me in over breakfast yeah?'

They all nodded in agreement. 'Honestly' continued Lily 'I'm quite interested to hear the beginning of the story as well'

With a small smile the two girls said their goodbyes and descended the staircase. 'How did they get up here?' demanded Sirius

Remus and James both shrugged 'I'm guessing they just walked Padfoot' responded James

'But, every time I've tried to go up the girl's staircase there's been a spell that has prevented me' he explained, earning him an eye roll from Remus.

'Well, how about you ask them over breakfast?' questioned Remus as he proceeded to wake Peter once more with a fresh wand of water.

'Excellent plan!' agreed Sirius

* * *

><p>'And then, Padfoot put up a shield charm causing my spell to bounce right off of it and hit Moony' James managed to say before dissolving into laughter once more.<p>

All six of them laughed loudly, occasionally drawing attention of the other students down for breakfast at that time, as Sirius and James told their extremely amusing adventure of that morning. They all wiped tears from their eyes as the story turned to a close, and their laughter soon faded, replaced by the occasional comment and forks scratching upon plates.

'So' started Remus casually 'Are you five excited for classes?'

Peter, Sirius, James and Marlene all groaned in displeasure, earning them an eye roll from both Remus and Lily. 'I sure am' stated Lily, taking a sip of her pumpkin juice, however just as she and Remus were about to dive into a conversation concerning school work, there were a few cries causing everyone to look up to witness the owls flying in with the post.

Letters and packages were dropped landing in front of their owners, and Lily watched happily as her friends caught their own letter's from home. Then suddenly to her surprise, along with the mornings profit she received a letter from home.

Marlene watched her curiously, leaning over the table to whisper 'What have you got there?'

Lily tore the profit and her letter apart to show Marlene the envelope. 'A letter from home' Lily stated, still surprised to be holding it. Upon seeing the parchment Marlene went back into her sitting position, beaming as she tore into her own letters.

Lily broke the seal on the envelope, a big smile plastered upon her face, however it suddenly fell upon reading the neatly printed script.

_You are cordially invited to celebrate the wedding of_

**_Petunia Evans _**

_and _

**_Vernon Dursley_**

_On Friday, October 25th_

_at 2 o'clock_

_Thirty-Five East Olive Avenue_

_followed by a reception_

She groaned, placing her head in her hands, drawing the attention of the others seated around her. 'Lily?' questioned Marlene 'What does the letter say?'

'Not letter' she mumbled through her hands, 'Invitation'

Marlene's eyes widened and she snatched the letter from her hands, then proceeded to read it herself, only to dissolve into laughter seconds later. 'She's marrying that whale of a man?' she managed to say, tears threatening at her eyes. Lily issued another groan, proceeding to bang her head lightly upon the table top, over and over again.

James cleared his throat uncertainly 'Um, what exactly is going on?' he asked

In response Marlene passed him the letter, unable to speak through her laughter. All four Marauder's leaned in as they read the neatly scripted writing. 'Lily-Flower, if you don't mind me asking, what's so bad about your sister's wedding?' questioned Sirius.

She rose her head from the table, to look the four Marauder's in the eyes. 'My sister hates me, and everything to do with magic' she replied bitterly 'She doesn't want me there, my mom, scratch that my dad probably forced her to send me an invitation. I'd rather serve a detention with Filtch, in the forbidden forest then go'

'Those aren't that bad' argued Sirius, causing James to chuckle

'You say that now' he continued 'You should have seen Padfoot back in fifth year, I swear he almost cried'

Sirius glared at him, muttering under his breath about him paying for that later, Marlene eventually stopped laughing and silence fell upon the group, 'What if' started James, turning back to Lily and catching the attention of the whole group, 'You brought a guest, or rather five guests'

Lily smiled weakly 'Honestly James, the whole reason my sister refuses to speak with me is because I'm a witch, If she doesn't even want one magical being at her wedding I doubt she'll be alright with six of us there'

'Well what if you just brought one other person?' he whispered to her, as if to prevent the others from hearing, however had no such luck.

'James Potter' she stated 'Are you asking me to my own sister's wedding?'

He shrugged, grabbing his goblet and taking a large gulp of pumpkin juice, causing her to just roll her eyes in response in attempt to hide the slight blush. Lily turned her attention back to the others who all appeared to have the same shocked expression plastered upon their faces. She cleared her throat, giving Marlene a look, 'Well, I need to run up to the common room before class'

She nodded, still in shock 'Yeah' she replied, standing from the table to meet Lily 'I'll come with you'

'Wait' squeaked Peter

Lily raised her eyebrows and turned around to face him 'Yes?' she questioned politely

'You forgot your letter' he stated holding it out to her, however she waved it off, making a motion to show she didn't want it. 'But there's something else in here'

She took the envelope from Peter, and plunged her hand into it, pulling out a small scrap of parchment. The whole group watched as Lily read it over, then proceeded to chuckle to herself. 'Thanks Peter' she replied, before turning around and walking from the Great Hall, Marlene following behind her.

'Lily' she demanded once they were out of eye sight 'What the bloody hell was that?'

'My dad just wrote me a funny little note about his feelings on the wedding' she responded, holding the parchment out to Marlene 'You can read it if you like...'

'No, not that!'

'Then what?' questioned Lily

'You, well when James asked you to..'

'Asked me to my sister's wedding...'

'Yeah, that. Well you were, you were blushing, I saw it!'

Lily suddenly stopped walking and turned to face Marlene 'I was not' she countered, however Marlene just smirked in reply.

'You better hope I was the only one who saw it, because if not you fancying James won't be a secret much longer'

'Wait' demanded Lily 'I do not fancy James!'

Marlene rolled her eyes in response 'Honestly Lily, you're completely smitten with him' causing Lily's cheeks to turn a dark shade of pink for the second time that morning.

XXX

'What was that?' demanded Sirius, once he could no longer see the girls

'What was what?' countered James, talking the Quidditch section out of the profit Remus had gone back to reading. Earning him a smack on the head from Sirius.

'You know exactly what I mean, that whole scene! With Lily's sister's wedding!'

James shrugged in reply, opening the parchment to read about the latest match, 'I've asked her out many times before, I honestly don't see how this time is any different'

Sirius rolled his eyes, 'Prongs, it's her _sister's _wedding, her whole family's going to be there, parents, cousins, siblings, hot distant relatives...'

'He's right Prongs' chimed in Remus 'Going to a wedding with her, that's pretty serious'

'Nothing like Sirius at all in my opinion' muttered Sirius under his breath, earning him an eye roll from all the other Marauders.

'One might even say, you love her' stated Peter, causing a chuckled from Remus and Sirius, forcing James to raise his eye brows in shock.

'I definitely do not love her' he responded,

However this only made the three others laugh harder, 'That's not what you told us last night after your third bottle of fire-whisky mate' stated Sirius, causing James to blush furiously, and lower his head in his hands, letting loose a very loud groan.

* * *

><p><strong>Please review. <strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**_Tuesday, September 9th_**

Slowly Lily's eyelids started to droop, as Professor Binns continued to ramble on, for the sixth year in a row**_, _**about goblin rebellion. Sure this was definitely not Head Girl behaviour, drifting off in the middle of a lesson, _but in my defence _thought Lily sleepily _I've already read 'A history of Magic' by Bathilda Bagshot at least three times._

'Lily' whispered Marlene, her table partner 'You can't possibly expect me to take notes this class'

Slowly Lily turned her head to face her best friend, opening her eyelids ever-so-slightly 'You have to' she responded 'It's your turn'

'Please' she begged 'You're so much better at resisting the soporific power of Binn's voice'

Lily groaned in reply, lifting her head off her desk and proceeding to take the quill and parchment from her best friend, who looked forever grateful. 'You owe me' she responded, before turning her head to the front of the classroom.

_Throughout the history of the Wizarding world, there have been several goblin rebellions. These rebellions were most prevalent in the 1600s and 1700s, but even today there are subversive goblin groups who work in secret against the Ministry_, Lily quickly jotted down, when to her surprise a small parchment landed on the edge of her desk. Refusing to let anything get in the way, she pocketed the note before Professor Binns could begin his next sentence.

Finally he slammed the textbook closed, causing the sleeping students to jump, roughly being pulled from their slumber, however he didn't seem to notice, like always. Before he could even mutter a word, the class had begun packing up and quickly exited the room and slowly the Professor retreated to his office.

'So Lils, where are you headed?' questioned Marlene, as she leaned against the table to wait as Lily packed up all her things.

'Runes, then Defence' she responded, excitedly, earning her an eye roll from Marlene.

'Honestly, I don't see why you enjoy school so much' she stated, shaking her head and walking a way, 'I'll see you in defence' she called over her shoulder before walking out the door.

She quickly made her way across the school, entering the classroom, only seconds before the Professor. Having just enough time to spot Remus, and happily except when he waved her over to sit beside him.

'Alright class' stated Professor Alse 'Please identify and translate the ancient runes on the board' within seconds the runes began to write themselves upon the chalk board.

Remus flashed her a grin before getting a head start on the runes. However, with a quick glance around the room Lily pulled the small parchment from her pocket, carefully unfolding it to reveal a very familiar script.

'Hey Lily' asked Remus, turning towards her, however instantly forgetting his question upon seeing her unreadable expression and the small parchment in her hands, 'What's that?'

She nodded, stowing the parchment into her pocket once more, not finding the chance to read it 'Yeah, everything's great'

'What was that?' he questioned

She shrugged picking up her quill and starting the work 'Just a spare piece of parchment,'

But Remus knew is wasn't nothing, and he was definitely going to worry about it,_ she always was a terrible liar,_ he thought bitterly, before turning back to his work.

XXX

James proceeded to poke Marlene in the back of the head for the fifth time that class, Sirius snickering beside him. Upon seeing their Muggle Studies Professor turn around to face the black board she angrily whirled round in her chair to face the two culprits.

'Would you quit it?' she hissed, glaring with distaste at the two boys.

'My my McKinnon' sang Sirius, leaning closer across the table 'What's got your knickers in a twist'

She sighed loudly, 'Honestly you two!' she shouted much louder than expected, causing all eyes in the class to turn towards her.

'Ms. McKinnon' stated the Professor walking towards her, 'What is so important that you must disrupt my class?' he demanded, raising his eyebrows.

Marlene hung her head, angrily muttering under her breath about how it was always her getting caught, because in all honesty it was always her, the Marauder's were just too talented at avoiding punishment. He sent her a disappointed glare before walking once more to the front of the classroom.

Then as if on cue, the poking and mischievous snickering behind her continued. Trying to keep her anger in check she proceeded to jot down a few useless notes on the subject however in one fatal poke, her anger came pouring out and she furiously turned to glare at the two boys. 'McKinnon!' shouted the Professor, 'This is the second time I'm talking to you about disrupting my class, If I have to talk to you one more time it'll be a detention for you tonight'

She sighed once more, and forced her gaze towards the front of the classroom, intent on ignoring James and Sirius and trying to pay attention so she wouldn't have to ask Lily for help for the second night in a row. However just as their Professor continued to speak once more she heard a small whisper from behind her.

'So Marlene' whispered James, leaning forward on his desk to be positive she heard him 'I heard Benji Ohonor talking in Arithmacy, he was saying some pretty interesting things' a blush slowly started to form on her cheeks.

'Whatever you heard' she hissed, through gritted teeth, 'Wasn't true'

Without even turning around she knew that the two boys were exchanging mischievous grins, before Sirius leaned forward to continue 'Yesterday night I was out and about with a certain ravenclaw, and we had happened to hear something, up on the fifth floor'

Marlene turned furiously around in her chair to face the two boys once again, an evil glint in her eye. 'I don't know what you heard Black, was it the sound of another breaking heart, because I heard that Sarah Bell spent this morning crying in the girl's lavatory'

'Honestly McKinnon, I was with her sister, Laura Bell'

Both James and Marlene raised her eyes, 'Sarah doesn't have a sister' muttered James under his breath.

Although Sirius just shrugged it off 'That's besides the point, I know snogging when I hear it Marlene' he sang, waggling his eyebrows. Not even a moment when by before she lifted her hand and smacked him right across the face, leaving a small red hand print behind.

'Ms. McKinnon, detention!' shouted the Professor, she groaned loudly, letting her forehead fall to the table, making contact with a small _thump. _

_'_Guess Marlene's going to be joining us for detention, huh Pads?' asked James_  
><em>

However as she heard once again her Professors voice continue to drone on about the use of a dishwasher, there was a barely audible whisper from behind her. 'Oi, and Marlene. The broom closet on the fifth floor is mine' responded Sirius, with a small chuckle from James beside him, 'Always has been'

XXX

'Turn to page three hundred and ninety four in your manuals' demanded their defence against the dark arts Professor as the all settled into their seats. Lily quickly pulled her book from her bag, flipping it open, raising a questioning hand upon seeing the chapter title.

'But Sir' she started 'Professor Grinble already taught us all about Werewolves back in third year'

'I am aware 's however we must review everything for your upcoming NEWT's' he countered, before turning back to the projector.

As the Professor fiddled around with the device, Lily turned towards Marlene, 'Why does Black keep nursing the red mark on his cheek?'

'He was out of line' started Marlene, causing Lily to grin, 'Like always. Started to talk about Benji. Last time I snog him, the bloody wanker can't keep his mouth shut'

'So that's where you were off too last night' she replied, her grin growing larger by the minute 'Although I did see the bloody wanker, as you so put it, on his way to the Hospital Wing, with a broken nose'

'You don't think' questioned Marlene, to which Lily just shrugged, turning her attention to the front of the classroom as the Professor started to review. 'No, he wouldn't'

Lily raised her eyebrows 'Why wouldn't he?' she retorted, causing Marlene's thoughts to wander throughout the first part of the lesson, her mind always straying back to the image of the sorry bloke running down the corridor towards the Hospital Wing. However she was suddenly pulled from her thoughts when James jumped into their conversation.

'Why wouldn't who do what?' questioned James, leaning forward in his seat, Sirius proceeding to do the same.

'Nothing' responded Marlene, 'Although, how did you two manage to land yourselves in detention?'

'You have?' demanded Lily turning to James, to which he nodded.

'Yeah and bloody dragged me down with you' added in Marlene.

'So you'll be missing patrols then yes?' Lily questioned James, completely ignoring Marlene, causing James to bring the palm of his hand towards his forehead.

'I'm so sorry' he replied 'It completely slipped my mind'

Lily just shrugged, 'It's alright, really. I will just go alone'

'No' interrupted James, 'I mean, why doesn't Remus go with you, or Mary, or Alice'

'Actually Prongs,' added in Remus, turning around in his seat, in front of Lily and Marlene, 'I promised to help Mary with some homework tonight, so I'm sorry Lily, any other time I would, but I promised'

'So what about Alice then?' questioned Sirius, however Marlene and Lily shared a glance, shaking their heads together.

'She'll probably be with Frank' stated Lily

'She will definitely be with Frank' corrected Marlene, flashing Lily a grin.

'I will just have to go alone then' she said, however just before James could put up another argument she cut him off 'I will be fine, honestly I don't know what you're worrying about, I'm completely capable of handling myself'

They all nodded in agreement, then slowly turned back to their work. Well Lily and Remus turned back to their work, not before sharing a glance and a small smile. However the others just proceeded to bicker quietly until the class ended and they all headed off towards the Great Hall for lunch.

'You'll watch the map?' asked James reassuringly as the three Marauder's walked to the great hall, a little ways behind Marlene and Lily.

Remus nodded, 'Of course, but I honestly don't see why you're so worried'

James shrugged, 'I just have a bad feeling is all' he responded, before speeding up to catch up with Lily.

* * *

><p>'I will be back every hour to check on you three, you are free to leave once you've finished cleaning all the trophies' stated their Professor, motioning to the hundreds of trophies around the walls in the trophy room. Marlene shrugged, <em>that's easy enough with a flick of wand these will all be shining brightly. <em>'Please hand over your wands'

She rolled her eyes, ruthlessly passed her wand to Sirius, who handed all three of them over and watched as her Professor put the three of them under a protected enchantment. 'The spell will break once the last trophy is clean' he stated, walking from the room. Supplying them with rags and buckets before exiting the room.

'Alright' she stated turning towards James and Sirius, 'Go on'

They both looked at her curiously 'What?' they questioned simultaneously

'Honestly, you're the Marauder's, I'm positive you have a way of making this work go faster' they both smiled mischievously in response.

'Ah Marlene' started James, patting down his pockets 'You know us all too well, now where did I put my wand?' he questioned.

'You just gave it to the Professor' said Marlene, rolling her eyes in response, however she gasped slightly when James pulled a wand from his pocket.

'You didn't honestly think we would give up our wands, you never give up your wand that easily McKinnon' stated James, turning to Sirius 'and she wants to become an Auror'

'And you couldn't have told me this, I would've handed over a branch or something' however both boys grinned at her, right before Sirius pulled out his wand along with hers from his pocket.

Her eyes widened 'How did you-'

'Loads of practice' he interrupted, passing her wand over. 'Now don't clean all of the trophies at the same time, we have to make it look like we're actually cleaning them by hand'

'Don't want them teachers to get suspicious and start questioning it' added James, to which Sirius nodded.

'Well, if you knew how to clean these already, why did you have to get me into detention anyway?' she demanded, stowing her wand in her pocket and turning to face the two boys after cleaning four trophies

The both shared a glance, then place their wands in their robes and turned to her. James shrugged, 'Donno, it seemed like a fun thing to do at the time' to which Sirius nodded in agreement, earning them both a smack across the head and a annoyed eye roll from Marlene.

* * *

><p>Lily walked down the fifth flour corridor, the only light from the almost full moon outside shining through the windows, filling the hall with a mysterious, blue white-ish light. The moon was big, letting in enough light that Lily felt no need to light the way with her wand. The only sound was the small <em>tap tap <em>of her shoes against the hard floor, the sound echoing for a minute, before fading away into the silence.

These patrols were rather boring when she didn't have someone to talk to, _they're much longer as well, _thought Lily, as she turned another corner. Suddenly the small noise of her shoes was met with hurried and quiet whispering on the other end of the corridor. Lily drew the wand from her pocket and advanced towards the three figures, who stopped talking abruptly upon hearing her draw nearer. Just as she could make out their faces, there was a weird feeling in her gut, something didn't feel right. _  
><em>

XXX

Remus had just returned from helping Mary out with homework, however now that he thinks about it, she rather knew what she was doing, they barely spent any time discussing their school work anyhow.

Although as curfew drew nearer, the two decided to call it a night and took the long way back to the common room. Upon entering the Gryffindor tower, Remus instantly felt as if something was wrong, and quickly bid a goodnight to Mary before running up the boy dormitories staircase. Once safe in the Marauder's dorm he pulled out the Map that he had promised James he would take, to keep an eye on Lily, and to check the map whenever he had a minute.

However as he looked at the Map now back in the common room, something didn't seem right. He searched quickly for Lily and dropped the Map in shock upon seeing her on the fifth floor, about to run into three seventh year Slyterins, who had most likely gotten together that night to show their support towards He-who-must-not-be-named.

Without a second thought, he picked up the Map, pulled his wand from his pocket and retreated down the stairs, right out of the Gryffindor common room, ignoring the strange glances from the other students, and in the hall. Running down them as fast as he possibly could.


	5. Chapter 5

**_A little recap for you :_**

_Lily walked down the fifth flour corridor, the only light from the almost full moon outside shining through the windows, filling the hall with a mysterious, blue white-ish light. The moon was big, letting in enough light that Lily felt no need to light the way with her wand. The only sound was the small tap tap of her shoes against the hard floor, the sound echoing for a minute, before fading away into the silence._

_These patrols were rather boring when she didn't have someone to talk to, they're much longer as well, thought Lily, as she turned another corner. Suddenly the small noise of her shoes was met with hurried and quiet whispering on the other end of the corridor. Lily drew the wand from her pocket and advanced towards the three figures, who stopped talking abruptly upon hearing her draw nearer. Just as she could make out their faces, there was a weird feeling in her gut, something didn't feel right.  
><em>

_XXX_

_Remus had just returned from helping Mary out with homework, however now that he thinks about it, she rather knew what she was doing, they barely spent any time discussing their school work anyhow._

_Although as curfew drew nearer, the two decided to call it a night and took the long way back to the common room. Upon entering the Gryffindor tower, Remus instantly felt as if something was wrong, and quickly bid a goodnight to Mary before running up the boy dormitories staircase. Once safe in the Marauder's dorm he pulled out the Map that he had promised James he would take, to keep an eye on Lily, and to check the map whenever he had a minute._

_However as he looked at the Map now back in the common room, something didn't seem right. He searched quickly for Lily and dropped the Map in shock upon seeing her on the fifth floor, about to run into three seventh year Slyterins, who had most likely gotten together that night to show their support towards He-who-must-not-be-named._

_Without a second thought, he picked up the Map, pulled his wand from his pocket and retreated down the stairs, right out of the Gryffindor common room, ignoring the strange glances from the other students, and in the hall. Running down them as fast as he possibly could._

'It's after hours' Lily stated, doing a good job of hiding the slight ounce of fear in her voice 'You should all be in bed'

There was a small whisper, and suddenly the dark corridor was filled with the light of someones wand, although, expecting the identity of the three to be revealed in the light, Lily was taken a back when she found that all the men were wearing scary masks.

'Well look at what we have here' hissed the one with the lit wand, pointing it closer to Lily to light up her face. 'Little Ms. Mudblood'

She glared daggers at the three, 'Get back to bed' she responded sharply 'Before I dock house points'

However this only caused the three to chuckle, their laughter echoing down the hall way, quickly fading once, what Lily imagined was their leader, sobered. 'You don't get it' argued the leader, 'House points mean nothing, there's a war going on sweet heart' he added, tracing a figure across her cheek.

'There might be a war going on, but as long as you're inside the walls of this castle you are forbidden to use such language and make such threats' she retorted, smacking the leader's hand away from her cheek, causing him to lower his extreme bright wand.

'As long as the dark lord remains alive, we have the power to do whatever we want to filthy little mudbloods like yourself'

'As long as Dumbledore remains alive and even after, we will continue to fight, out there' she stated, motioning to a near by window, 'and in here' Lily added quickly before drawing her wand and proceeding to send their leader flying backwards into the wall behind him. His two other followers stood in shock as they watched him slam right into the wall, landing on the ground with a small _thump. _

'What are you doing?' he demanded 'Don't just stand there, teach that mudblood what happens when she plays with fire' The other two nodded before whirling around to face Lily, who had her wand pointed right at them.

'Now don't do something stupid' she threatened, however completely ignoring her the two other boys raised their wands, both sending curses flying her way, which she intended to block although the shield charm she cast had faltered and she went flying back down the hall way. Landing a few feet away from where she previously stood.

She ducked quickly as another white light came flying towards her, missing her only in the slightest. Angrily, she retorted, sending a particularly nasty stinging jinx at the boy who had fired the spell, smirking as he howled in pain. Suddenly their leader was back on his feet, and as the third mended the painful stinging jinx, she fought the two others, single handed.

XXX

Remus raced down the hall, as fast as he thought was humanly possible. However upon colliding with a very solid object, he went tumbling to the ground, taking the other thing down with him. 'Bloody hell Moony' replied a confused James Potter. 'What in Merlin's beard are you doing?'

Unable to find his words from having the wind knocked right out of him. He shoved the map into James' hands, pointing to Lily's exact location and her other opponents, and the two watched as one of the attackers, when flying backwards. 'She' panted Remus 'Needs help'

James nodded, standing quickly and pocking his head back into the classroom, pointing his wand at the remaining trophies, leaving them extremely clean. 'Padfoot, we have to go' he stated, 'Marlene we will see you back in the common room'

She agreed, exiting the room, heading down the corridor, away from the scene a floor above them. 'What's going on Prongs?' questioned Sirius, exiting the room behind James, a surprised expression as he saw Remus running down the corridor in the opposite direction from Marlene.

'Padfoot' he started 'Lily's in trouble, up on the fifth floor'

Sirius nodded and the two proceeding to run down the hall, after Remus. However as James slowly started to pull ahead of Sirius, he stopped. 'Pads what are you doing?' demanded James, as he continued to run, although his questions were soon answered when a rather large, black dog ran streaking past him.

XXX

Lily watched as two out of three of them were nursing their heads from hitting the wall with such great force, and as she raised her wand on the third, he spoke. 'Lily' stated the voice, in which she instantly recognized 'Get yourself out of here' she shook her head violently, 'I can't hurt you' stated her former best friend.

XXX

James smirked, stopping quickly, then suddenly a sleek brown stag ran after the dog. They caught up with Remus and the three turned to corner to watch as one of the three boys disarmed Lily, and moved in closer. 'You get off of her' shouted James, back in his human form, however when the attacker didn't lower his wand, the black dog ran right into him, sending him to the ground.

Lily stood shocked for a moments time, before retreating down the hallway to pick up her wand. Whirling around to see James, Sirius and Remus each fighting one of the boys. She advanced towards the battle, however just as Sirius' opponent went flying backwards, James turned to face her, his smirk fading, after doing a double take. He told his mates to watch his back, and they both agreed.

Lily watched curiously as James took one large step towards her, however just as he was about to say something, she grasped her waist, hissing in pain. She then looked down at her hand and shirt to see them covered in blood, 'Lily' he questioned 'You're bleeding'

She rolled her eyes, however they widened considerably as she quickly rose her wand, casting an extremely quick shield charm as a white flash came flying towards them. 'Sorry' she heard Sirius yell 'I'll get him this time' and within seconds the caster was stunned.

'Come on Lily, you've got to get to the Hospital Wing' stated James, ushering her down the hallway.

'No' she commanded 'I'm perfectly fine'

'Lily you're bleeding' he stated obviously

'I know that,' she retorted walking back towards the fight, 'It's just a scratch' then before James could argue she was back in the fight. Within a minute, she had stunned the second of the three. Sirius smirked at her as Remus sent the final blast towards the remaining man. They all sighed in relief, the three boys turning to face Lily.

'Tiger-Lily?' questioned Sirius 'Are you alright?'

However she didn't respond as she swayed back and forth of her feet. They all watched with worried expressions plastered all over their faces, before everything went black. And all Lily remembers before passing out is a very familiar pair of arms.

'Nice catch' stated Remus, James flashed him a smile 'What should we do about them?' he asked, turning around to see the three stunned death eater's however all he saw was an empty hallway.

'Where did they go?' demanded Sirius, raising his wand protectively.

James shrugged, picking Lily up, bridal smile 'Forget about it, we've got more important things to worry about' he stated, briskly walking down the corridor. Taking a secret passageway behind an old portrait, before reappearing outside of the Hospital Wing.

'Madame Pomfrey!' hollered Sirius, as the three burst into the room,

'What is it now Mr. Black?' she demanded, coming out into the wing from her office, 'Don't tell me Mr. Potter's rearranged your facial features again' however she stopped suddenly in shock, upon seeing the three boys and a bleeding Lily Evan's. 'Set her down over here' she stated, ushering them to the furthest bed from the door. They all watched worriedly as the healer proceeded to nurse the gash across her waist.

* * *

><p>Two mornings after, just as James was about to push the doors to the Hospital Wing open, there were voices on the other side, causing him to hesitate. 'I assure you Madame Pomfrey, I'm perfectly fine to attend classes. There is no need to keep me here any longer' stated Lily, to which James smiled upon hearing her awake and well, back to her old self again.<p>

'Ms. Evan's, I ask you kindly to please lie back down' retorted the nurse.

'Honestly, I'm fine. It's just a scratch,'

'Deary, if you don't get back in that bed right this minute, I might have to resort to using magic against you' she responded sweetly, causing James to chuckle as he pushed the doors open.

Both woman turned their heads to see who was the cause of the noise, and much to James' delight Lily's face light up considerable upon laying eyes on him. 'James!' she cried, taking a few steps towards him, 'It's so good to see you, now who you please convince Madame Pomfrey here that I am perfectly capable of attending my classes today'

He smiled down at her, however raised a questioning eyebrow upon seeing her arm in a sling. 'When did that happen?' he asked

A small blush grew on her cheeks, 'We had this exact same debate yesterday ' started the nurse as she fiddled around with a few different potions, 'Although Ms. Evan's walked right into a chair, still a bit dizzy from blood loss, tripping over it, spraining her wrist in the process'

James laughed aloud, causing Lily to smack him, with quite a lot of force, on the arm. 'But Madame Pomfrey, you said it yourself that my wrist was practically healed, plus I promise to come right back up here if my wound reopens' started Lily 'Please oh please let me go to class'

'Honestly Poppy' agreed James 'No student would ever ask you to let them go to class, they might even purposely break or sprain another bone, so if Lily's begging you to actually let her leave to attend class. Well it just must be extremely important to her, and I recon you should let her go'

After a few moments where the healer seemed to be contemplating, she finally nodded. 'Alright' she sighed 'You may go Ms. Evan's' upon hearing this Lily let out a cry of delight 'However, I want to see you every night before you go to bed, to check that wound. And Mr. Potter, she is your responsibility, if you see fit that she should come to the Hospital Wing, then she must, agreed?'

'Yes' nodded Lily, excitedly 'You have my word'

James smiled down at her 'And mine as well'

She nodded, heading towards her office 'Now get to class or you'll be late' she finished closing the door.

Lily turned to James absolutely beaming, 'Thank you so much' she stated, gathering her things and proceeding to the door 'She wouldn't have let me go if it wasn't for you'

'All in a days work, and quite honestly, I really need your help in charms and you couldn't do much trapped in the Hospital Wing' stated James, which earned him a well deserved smack on the arm. 'May I escort to you potions?' he questioned, leading them down the nearest hall.

'I was hoping we could take a little detour' responded Lily, taking the lead 'I need to stop by the common room, there's no way I'm going to potions with a blood stained t-shirt. It would raise too much suspicion'

He chuckled in agreement, following Lily into the common room, and waiting as she changed, so they could walk down to potions together. Plus after the events of two nights previous there was no way in hell that he was going to let her wander the castle alone, at night or even during the day.

'Ah Ms. Evan's' stated Professor Slughorn as both she and James walked into the room, at least five minutes late. 'So nice of you to join us, I'm sure you'll be very excited to hear that today we are brewing the Elixir to Induce Euphoria found on page seventeen in you advanced potion making textbooks'

Lily smiled kindly at the professor, responding pleasantly before walking off to her work station next to Remus and across from James and Sirius. 'Honestly,' stated Lily, upon arriving at the table, James not far behind, 'Elixir to Induce Euphoria, this couldn't be easier to brew'

Remus nodded his agreement 'You started cutting up the Mint Sprigs then and I'll go and get the Wormwood and Porcupine Quills from the cupboard' Lily agreed, taking out a small cutting knife.

'Yeah, you do what Lily's doing and I'll follow Remus' stated James, walking off a bit confused.

'You two honestly don't know what you're doing, do you?' questioning Lily, adding the Mint to the cauldron, turning the liquid a yellow-ish orange. Sirius mirroring her, before responding.

'Not a clue,' he stated, causing Lily to roll her eyes 'But what I don't understand is why the Professor always partners up the smart people together, instead of evenly distributing them among us pretenders'

'Pretenders?' she asked, curiously.

'Yeah' agreed Sirius, as Remus and James returned 'People who pretend to know what their doing'

She laughed lightly, causing all three boys to look at her in confusion, for up until last year Lily had never laughed at anything the Marauder's had said, and it had come as a bit of a shock. However before she could question their glances, Slughorn spoke once more.

'It seems as if Ms. Evan's and Mr. Lupin's potion is coming along quite splendidly, Merlin's pants, it's already got her laughing!' he exclaimed proudly, before muttering under his breath about awarding them both with five points.

'Thank you professor' they both responded, simultaneously.

'It's no trouble,' he waved them off 'However in return I do expect both of you to be at my next Slugclub party this Saturday night yes?'

They both agreed politely, as he walked around the table to peer into James and Sirius' cauldron, before backing away quickly at the smell. 'You two should be there as well' he stated 'I'm intrigued to know what your father is up to lately in the Auror corporation Mr. Potter, same for you Mr. Black, I would love to hear what Orion has been up to'

Sirius rolled his eyes at the mention of his father, however James agreed politely for them both, causing Lily to raise her eyebrows. 'Hold on, you two are going?' she questioned, 'Aren't you always trying to find a reason not to go?'

'What you don't see Tiger-Lily' started Sirius 'Is that if we go to the first one, we'll be off the hook for the next four or five'

'Plus' agreed James 'Next weekends Quidditch tryouts, and I wouldn't want to be forced into going to a Slugclub party because I have to be at that tryout, for I am the captain this year'

Sirius punched him in the shoulder, as Remus rolled his eyes. 'Honestly,' Remus whispered to Lily 'He's been bragging about it ever since he got the letter from Dumbledore'

Lily smiled, shaking her head as both Sirius and Remus continued to listen to their mate, who rambled on about the great achievement that came with being captain, before turning back to the potion.

* * *

><p>Lily folded her clothes that she had lazily tossed on her bedroom floor earlier that morning, wanting to get to class as soon as possible. However as she picked up her black skirt, she felt something in her pocket. Intrigued she pulled it out, and un-crumbled the piece of parchment careful not to rip it. Upon seeing the writing, she recognized it as the parchment from two days ago that had been placed on her desk in a history of magic.<p>

She looked at the small scrawl on the parchment, and instantly recognized the writing.

_Avoid the fifth flour corridor at all costs tonight, they're planning something._

She read it over and over, before sighing heavily, 'He was trying to warn me' she said aloud to no one but herself, 'Severus was trying to warn me'

* * *

><p>'Do you think Slughorn wants us to bring dates to his party?' questioned Remus, nonchalantly as he turned over another page in his favourite muggle book.<p>

Both James and Sirius nodded 'I recon he does' started Sirius 'He's always going on about how it's not proper to attend a party alone, blahblahblah...' he trailed off, shoving his face into a nearby pillow.

'Who are you guys going to ask then?' asked Peter, fidgeting in Lily's chair that she had claimed in the Head's common room.

Sirius quickly rose his head from being buried in the pillow and turned towards Peter, flashing him a smile before responding, 'Obviously Prongs is going to ask Lily-Flower, who, like always, will turn him down'

'Oi!' objected James, however Sirius ignored him and continued on 'Remus will probably ask some book worm, someone he met in the library no doubt'

'Actually Padfoot' started James 'After Remus' study date-'

'It was not a date' he interrupted sharply, closing his book with a _snap_. To which James rolled his eyes 'Honestly mate, Mary is a very bright witch, she was playing you when she asked you to help her out with homework. She probably just wanted to spend some alone time with you' upon hearing this Peter and Sirius both wolf-whistled.

Only making Remus blush harder 'Anyway' continued James 'After Remus' study date with Mary, I recon he's going to ask her'

'That leaves Padfoot then' stated Peter, shooting the boy in question a demanding look.

Sirius rolled his eyes, putting his hands behind his head, before shrugging. 'You know me, I snog a different girl everyday, well almost everyday, who knows who I'll take to that party'

They conversation was quickly dropped when Lily came bounding down her staircase into the common room, making her way over towards the portrait hole 'Where are you going?' demanded James, sitting up a little in his chair.

'To the Owlery,' she responded calmly 'I forget to respond to my sister's wedding invitation'

'Oh?' questioned James, 'You know it's past curfew?'

She rolled her eyes, before pushing the portrait open, ever so slightly, to check down the halls. 'What's gotten into you?' she demanded, faking a shocked expression, 'You were always the ones telling me to let loss and lighten up, now when I do so much as put a toe out of line, you're on my back?'

Both Remus and Sirius snorted loudly, attempting to keep their laughter in check. 'You don't think that after the events a few night previous that you shouldn't be wandering the castle alone?' he retorted calmly.

'Alright' she agreed, 'If I'm not back in ten minutes, you have my permission to come running through the corridors to make sure I'm alive'

James walked over to her, extending his hand, 'Deal' he muttered, as she took his hand in her and shook. She dropped his hand, with another roll of her eyes, before turning round and pushing the portrait fully open, before disappearing into the dark corridor. James then turned quickly around to face his best mates, who were all now gathered around a large piece of parchment, in which he recognized as the Marauder's Map.

'What are you three doing?' asked James, returning to his spot.

'Honestly mate' started Sirius 'You're not the only one that cares about Lily-Flower in this room'

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><p><strong><em>Review please, <em>**


	6. Chapter 6

**_Saturday, September 13th_**

Lily and Marlene stood outside Slughorn's rather large office where, through the door, was the party. They were both wearing their best attire, Lily wearing a beige, knee length dress, thick straps holding it up crossing over in the back, her long red hair cascading down her back in small curls, giving it a little bound with every step she took. Marlene wearing a light blue, almost teal dress, falling a little short of her knees, held up by small halter straps that were barely visible under her straitened blonde hair.

'Honestly' stated Marlene, as the two girls stood outside in the corridor 'I don't know why I let you drag me to this party anyway'

Lily rolled her eyes, 'Slughorn invited you specifically, plus I didn't force you to come, I only insisted that if you didn't I wouldn't let you copy my notes for the rest of the year'

'Which was completely unfair, seeing as it's NEWTS year and you knew I needed your notes' she retorted, crossing her arms over her chest. After a few moments of silence passed between the two girls, Marlene sighed, 'Well, I didn't get dragged all the way down here to stand outside in the corridor'

'I suppose you're right' agreed Lily.

'Why are you so nervous anyway?' demanded Marlene, raising her eyebrows, causing Lily to only roll her eyes once more, than proceed to push the door open. Letting noise and light fill the empty corridor. Casually, she and Marlene strutted into the room, they're plan to lay low completely failing when all eyes fell upon the two girls.

Slowly but surely the party continued normally, out of the corner of their eyes, Lily saw Mary standing near the wall with Remus, Sirius and James, however quickly rushing over to them. 'It's about time' she hissed 'I was starting to think you two weren't going to show up'

Marlene pointed an accusing figure at Lily 'It's her fault, honestly, we've been standing out in the corridor for the last ten minutes'

'It hasn't been ten minutes' retorted Lily, looking up from the ground, a small smile creeping onto her face. 'Five at the most'

All three girls started to laugh lightly, drawing the slightest bit of attention towards the two girls, however Mary was first to sober, peeking behind the two girls then sighing before facing them. 'You two really came alone?' she asked, to which they both nodded. 'You're telling me that no one asked you'

At this both girls started to laugh once more 'Of course we were asked!' exclaimed Marlene, a little too loud, causing more head's to turn. 'I, however, declined the offers, but Lily-' although before Marlene had a chance to finished, Lily felt a slight tap upon her shoulder, and whirled around to come face to face with Amos Diggory. 'Lily' he whispered under his breath, 'You look absolutely stunning'

'Why thank you Amos' she replied, trying to hide her blush 'You look good yourself'

'Don't I' he agreed, twirling around as if to show them his attire from all angles, chuckling lightly while all three girls just continued to stare at him, 'Well how about we dance?' he questioned, Lily nodded her agreement, letting herself be led by Amos to the middle of the floor. Flashing her two best friends a nervous grin before turning back to her dance partner.

'So hows Remus been?' demanded Marlene, chuckling as Mary started to blush.

'Come on' she answer, grabbing hold of her wrist and dragging her back towards the three Marauder's.

XXX

James was laughing along with Sirius at a story he had been telling him, while Remus and Mary continued to look at each other adoringly. However they both quickly sobered as the room fell silent and they turned, along with everyone else, to face the doors, in which both Marlene and Lily had just entered.

James felt his eyes widen and he might have gasped, she look breathtaking. He glanced over at Sirius, who had the same glazed look in his eye as James did only moments before, slowly his mate turned to face him and the two proceeded to share longing glances for the two girls that had just entered the room.

'Oh sweet Merlin' gasped Mary 'Don't they just look wonderful!' to which both Sirius and James nodded sheepishly in agreement, before shaking out of their shocked state and simultaneously taking a sip from their spiked punch.

Remus turned back to Mary, whispering something in her ear, causing her to blush even more. 'Probably something along the lines of, not as good as you' muttered James under his breath to Sirius, who grunted in agreement, taking another gulp of his punch.

The room went back to their conversations eventually, however James didn't seem to notice, to wrapped up in everything Lily Evan's. He observed as Mary strutted over to the two girls, and watched as Lily hung her head in embarrassment, then laughed along with her other friends. James smiled, vowing one day to be able to make her laugh like that, however he was pulled from his musings by Sirius, frantically waving a hand in front of his face.

'I don't understand you two' stated Remus 'You're both obviously completely mesmerized by the two girls in front of you. You should have just asked them to this stupid party'

'Speak for yourself' objected Sirius, 'I'm not swooning over a bird like James is'

'Of course you're not' agreed Remus 'Everyone is well aware that James is completely smitten with Lily, however you'd have to be really observant to know that you fancy Marlene'

Before Sirius could argue, James interrupted 'He's right mate, you fancy the pants off Marlene' although he cringed as soon as the words left his mouth. 'Sorry' he muttered 'Poor choice of words considering you've been with half the birds in seventh year'

'Oh come on Prongs' huffed Remus, 'He has not been with half the girls in seventh year'

'Yeah' agreed Sirius, faking offence 'Definitely more than half, honestly, get your numbers right'

The conversation was quickly dropped as Mary and Marlene approached the three boys, Remus snaking an arm around Mary's waist upon her arrival, muttering something about a dance and carting her off to the dance floor.

Marlene stood in front of the two boys, proceeding to snatch Sirius' cup from his hands, taking a gulp of his drink before handing it back. 'McKinnon, you know that was spiked with fire-whisky right?' said Sirius.

'I wouldn't expect any less from you' she stated, 'Why else do you think I took your cup other than James'?'

'She's right Padfoot' agreed James 'I don't drink'

Marlene rolled her eyes, and proceeded to chuckled along with Sirius at that statement, 'You're not fooling anyone Prongs' he stated, sobering quickly after Marlene.

James' eyes started to wander as he scanned the room for Lily, 'Where is Lily?' he asked, casually as if to make conversation. 'Not that it matter's'

Marlene smiled, 'She's off somewhere with Diggory'

'I suppose he brought her here then?' retorted James, jealousy growing in his eyes.

'I'm not sure actually, he talked to her as if she was his date, though Lily told me she didn't have one. She was probably lying to me, so I didn't have to walk into this bloody party alone, plus if it wasn't for her I wouldn't be here at all.' she said, taking another sip from Sirius' cup, wincing slightly as the mixture burned her throat.

James scanned the crowd hopefully, before spotting her across the room, dancing with Diggory. Sirius sighed, shaking his head, earning him a questioning look from Marlene. 'Well, now that James is off in Lily-land' he started, causing Marlene to chuckle lightly. 'Hows about you and I dance?' She smiled in response, eagerly giving the cup that she stole from Sirius to a dazed James, before taking Sirius' extended hand and walking to the dance floor.

James watched angrily as Lily laughed along with Diggory at something one of his mates had said, before sighing audibly.'This is going to be a long night' he said to himself, putting down the cup and walking over to the group of seventh year ravenclaws that kept sending him hopeful gazes.

* * *

><p>James lounged lazily in the Head's common room, in front of the fire, still in his dress robes, having given up on the party two hours ago after dancing with one sixth year ravenclaw, who had talked way too much for his liking. Out of habit, James ran a hand through his hair, before pulling out his wand and proceeding to transfigure different objects around the room.<p>

Five minutes until curfew he heard approaching footsteps and the slight murmur of voices on the other side of the portrait. As it swung open, James quickly pulled his invisibility cloak over his head, disappearing from the room entirely. He watched as Lily poked her head into the common room, before entering and ushering Amos in behind her.

'I suppose James hasn't returned from the party' started Lily, looking up his staircase towards his bedroom door, to see it pulled tightly closed.

'Yeah' agreed Amos, as he surveyed Lily when she had her back turned, an act that made James want to rip of the cloak and punch that blokes face in, although he held back. 'He's probably off pulling a prank or snogging some sixth year in a closet somewhere'

Lily hummed in agreement, turning around and taking a step towards Amos. 'Thank you for the great night'

It was his turn to take a step, James watched completely horrified as Amos started to close the gap between him and Lily, and shut his eyes sharply the moment their lips touched. A small idea was growing in the back of James' mind, and as jealously over took him, he angrily knocked over the lap beside him (what he would later tell his mates was an accident). Lily broke away from Amos quickly, turning to look for the cause of the noise, her eyes lingering over the place where James was hidden a little longer than they should have. She took a hesitant step back from Amos, 'It was probably just the wind' she assured him, walking over towards the window and pulling it tightly closed.

Amos nodded his agreement, before walking back towards Lily, kissing her quickly once more before saying his goodbyes and exiting from the portrait hole. James watched as Lily lingered in the common room, a grin growing upon her face, before she whirled around, dancing with joy as she headed to her room.

As soon as her bedroom door clicked closed, James huffed loudly, shaking himself out of his jealous state, before walking from the common room, assuring himself that a trip to the kitchens would clear his mind from the scene he just witnessed. He stormed down the halls, not paying any attention to the confused portraits along the walls, that heard the noise he made however didn't see it's source. He wanted to puke, he wanted to throw something, but over everything else, he wanted to fly, to get onto his broom and clear his head in the cold fall breeze.

James quickly changed his direction, heading strait for the Gryffindor common room, where he was sure he left his broom. Although upon entering the room, pushing his old dormitories door open with much force causing it to smash into the wall. Scaring the incredibly bored Sirius, who was lounging on his bed, staring up at the ceiling and Remus, who was absorbed in a muggle book.

'Prongs?' demanded Sirius, now sitting up strait in his bed, 'For the sake of Merlin tell me that's you under your invisibility cloak'

James whipped off the cloak before marching over to his bed and frantically searching under it, 'Don't get your wand in a twist' he assured them 'I'm just here to get my broom'

Both boys proceeded to raise their eyebrows, 'Why on earth do you need your broom at such an hour?' questioned Remus, glancing at his muggle watch. 'Quidditch isn't until next weekend'

'I bloody well know that already, I organized it' he hissed in response, pulling his cleansweep out from under his bed, 'I'm going out for some air'

The two boys shared a brief glance before standing from their respective beds and walking over towards their mate, Sirius plopping himself down upon James' old bed, Remus standing with his arms crossed over his chest at the foot of the bed. James sighed, 'What?' he demanded at his mates questioning glares.

'You know what!' retorted Sirius harshly, earning him a warning glare from Remus. 'Honestly Prongs, whenever you say you're going out for some air somethings more so someones got you thinking'

'It's nothing' he assured them, attempting to push past the two boys, however failing quickly.

'Tell us' demanded Remus, 'Prongs what's got you this angry?'

'She bloody well snogged him right in front of me, that' he had planned to call her an extremely foul name however faltered and trailed off angrily.

Both boys nodded, everything suddenly crystal clear, 'Hey Moony, does this room wreak of jealousy or is it just me?' asked Sirius, playfully.

'I am not jealous' James retorted, anger returning into his voice. However both Sirius and Remus scoffed at his statement

'Come on Prongs' started Remus 'After living in the same dorm with you for six years, I think we, of all people would know that when you get jealous you get angry. You're an angry jealous type of bloke' Sirius nodded in agreement, however James didn't look too please, proceeding to pick up the nearest item, that happened to be Peter's transfiguration text book and throw it angrily at the wall.

'I am not jealous' he hissed again, throwing on his invisibility cloak and storming from the dorm, broom in hand.

Within minutes a small figure, mounted on a broom could be seen from the boys dormitory in the Gryffindor common room. 'He will come around' reasoned Sirius as both he and Remus crawled back into their respective beds.

'Always does' agreed Remus, before both boys, joined Peter in deep slumbers.

* * *

><p>The next morning, as predicted, James did come around. Showering his best mates with apologies before reasoning and telling them the true story, describing the scene from last night with extreme detail. The three Marauder's would later tell James that he completely over reacted, matching his arguments with the fact that Lily has witnessed many of James' midnight snoggings. After another over reaction, he finally came to realize that he might have over reacted, but just a little, after all, it would have been easier on Lily to witness him with another girl because she wasn't head over heals, in love with him, like he was with her.<p>

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><p><strong>Review?<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**_Saturday, September 26th_**

'But Lily' wined Marlene, as she continued to follow her frantic best friend around her Head's common room, 'You have to come to the game, seriously it's the first match of the season!'

She sighed deeply, pausing and turning towards her best friend before tearing the cushions from the sofa, 'Marlene' she stated 'I already told you, I've got to study, it's NEWTS year for Merlin sake, you can't expect me to be wasting away my time by watching silly Quidditch matches'

'As my best friend, It's required that you come and support me' retorted Marlene, however it appeared as if Lily wasn't even paying attention, proceeding to tear every book of the shelves in search for her transfiguration text book. Sighing audibly, Marlene picked up her broom, in which she had placed steadily in the corner of the room, before exiting through the portrait hole and making her way to meet the rest of the team for breakfast.

She strode into the Great Hall, her broom gripped tightly in her hand, and walked straight over to where James, Sirius and Remus were seated. Not bothering to make conversation, all too interested in eating the extravagant breakfast that had been set out. 'How the weather?' she inquired, plopping herself at the table next to Sirius, placing her broom under her seat along with the three others.

James set down his fork, pausing momentarily to swallow his food before responding, 'Perfect Quidditch weather, although there is a bit of a breeze, so you're going to have to counter-act that when hitting the bludgers' he stated, eyeing her empty plate and proceeding to pile mounds on food onto it.

She grumbled in agreement, pulling her plate sharply away from James to stop him from adding more food. She watched as Remus made a grab for his cup, however it slipped in his grip, spraying pumpkin juice all over the table, earning him chuckles from the others at the table.

'A little nervous are you Moony?' questioned Sirius, through large bits of food.

He shook his head with determination, 'No' he squeaked in reply, sounding strangely like Peter.

'There's no need to be!' butted in James enthusiastically. 'You'll do great, if I do say so myself, I've picked a great team this year'

'Always the modest one, you are' added in Marlene, tipping her cup to him before sipping the juice.

After a few moments of silence passed between the four players, in which all that could be heard was Sirius' rather loud and aggressive chewing and the scraping of forks on their plates, James spoke once more. 'So,' he questioned, looking to Marlene for an answer 'Where's my good luck charm?'

Marlene chuckled, along with Remus and Sirius 'Honestly mate, I don't think I've ever seen Lily at a Quidditch game' stated Sirius, 'She couldn't possibly be your good luck charm'

James simply rolled his eyes in response 'So, where is she?' he asked once more, raising his eyebrows slightly.

'Not coming,' admitted Marlene, to no ones surprise, 'Claims there's too much studying to be done'

Both James and Sirius chuckled as if sharing an inside joke 'It's going to be bloody hard to study without any of her books' said James, a mischievous grin growing on his face.

'You didn't' started Marlene, her smile growing even bigger.

'Honestly, we had to' started Sirius 'Like I said, I've never even seen Lily at a match, so we hid her books'

'And what if she just goes to my dormitory and takes mine, or Mary's, or Alice's?' she questioned.

James quickly swallowed the juice in his mouth, 'We hid yours as well' he added non-nonchalantly 'She'll have no choice but to come down to the match'

XXX

To their amusement, a rather annoyed red head could be spotted walking down to the pitch with Alice and Mary, along with all the others inhabitants of Hogwarts, excited to witness the first match of the year.

James watched with distaste as Amos Diggory, captain of the Hufflepuff team also keeper, hoped on his broom, riding it over to where Lily sat with her friends. His fists latched tightly around his broom, causing his knuckles to turn slightly white, when he saw Lily flush at something the bloke had said. He was quickly pulled from his musings when Sirius placed a reassuring hand upon his shoulder. 'We'd better get in there' he said, motioning to the changing rooms where the team was said to be meeting. James nodded, tearing his away from the now retreating Amos, and following his best mate into the small building under the announcer.

'Alright' started James, upon entering the changing room, 'Is everyone here?'

Everyone muttered their agreements and suddenly fell silent, which was James' cue to continue with his pregame speech. 'I know some of you might be nervous, and I'm not going to tell you that there's nothing to be nervous about because you and I both know that bullocks. Hufflepuff is a good, strong team, and I'm aware we've only practised once together, however I know we can beat them. We are better and stronger, now put a smile on your face and get out there!' he urged them, heading towards the door. 'The cup is ours this year!' he finished before exiting the room, his team following close behind.

'Welcome to the first match of the season Gryffindor vs. Hufflepuff' James heard the announcer, Marcus Finnigan, a fellow Gryffindor and a friend. 'Amos Diggory has picked a strong team this year, all returning players, who are familiar with playing with each other and work well together. Although, James Potter has chosen a well built team, keep a look out for their new seeker and a new chaser. Rumour has it that the team has only gotten together once to practice, however after speaking with James earlier he told me that he has much confidence in his team, positive that they will succeed.'

'Now on with the match!' he stated and suddenly the small alley way in which the team resided in was filled with light, signalling the players to mount their brooms and fly briefly around the pitch. 'Playing on the Hufflepuff team this year is, Alicia Bones, beater, along with her younger brother Micheal, chaser, Trevor Taylor, chaser, Anna Scotsmen, beater, Derek Stone, beater, along with, Maggie Pucey, Nick Gold, seeker and Amos Diggory, keeper and the captain of the team' the stand erupted into cheers, both Hufflepuff and Slyterin students. 'On the Gryffindor team we have, Marlene Mckinnon, beater, Sirius Black, beater, Gregory Andrews, keeper, Remus Lupin, chaser, Hallie Bloomsburry, chaser, Peter Johnson, seeker, and James Potter, chaser and captain'

Madame Hooch blew her whistle and all the players assembled into formation, hovering over top of her. She glanced at them all in turn, 'Now I want a nice fair game, all of you' he demanded, 'Captains' both James and Amos flew towards the ground, landing nicely in front of her. 'Shake hands' she demanded, the two did as told and upon witnessing a nod from Madame Hooch they mounted their brooms once more, taking off into the sky getting back into formation.

All watched with anticipation as Madame Hooch unhatched the Quidditch box and as the budgers and snitch was released. Suddenly the Quaffle was up in the air and the teams broke formation in hopes to retrieve it. 'And the Quaffle is taken immediately by Hallie Bloomsburry, who quickly passes to Lupin, who swerves around Gold making a short pass to Potter, who sends it right past Amos, scoring on the middle hoop.' Marcus announced excitedly, 'Diggory to Pucey, oh' he shouted 'intercepted by Potter, take that Maggie!'

'Mr. Finnigan!' Professor McGonagall shouted in warning,

'Sorry Professor' he muttered, 'Potter to Lupin, he shoots' he finished, taking in a rather large gust of air in anticipation, 'It's saved by Diggory' the Quaffle was quickly thrown back into the match and the players continued to shoot, pass, dive and intercept it. Leaving everyone on the edge of their seats the entire game. All to quickly the snitch was spotted and the two seekers started their flight, 'And Bloomsburry scores, 150 to 90 for Gryffindor'

As the two seekers continued on a great chase around the pitch, all eyes watched them, the teams occasionally scoring points. However while all eyes were diverted a beater on the Hufflepuff team swiftly took hold of their bat, sending a bludger towards the captain of the opposing team. Lily Evan's eyes widened in horror as she watched the ball sore through the air towards an unsuspecting James, her heart dropped and she felt her voice catch in her throat upon yelling out. 'James!' she hollered, in attempts to warn him. 'James!' she repeated

Just as the Bludger was about to make contact with the captain, Sirius, having been the only one that heard Lily, flew over towards his best mate, 'Prongs' yelled Sirius, catching his best mates attention and giving him enough time to swerve out of the way before the Bludger could hit him. He then flew right past his best mate, taking his bat and hitting, with much force, the ball back towards the Hufflepuff player.

'Thanks mate' stated James, to which Sirius simply waved off.

'Get back to the game,' he said, 'And watch out so I don't have to be saving your bloody arse every time a Bludgers sent your way'

Taking his mates advice, he, along with Remus and Hallie, scored another twenty points for the Gryffindor team, sending the last one through the middle hoop just as Peter Johnson's hand clasped tightly around the little gold ball. The stands erupted in cheers, running onto the field to congratulate their house team.

'Lily!' shouted Marlene when seeing her making her way back to the castle. Lily, upon hearing her name, spun round to come face to face with her best friend. 'Wasn't that a great match!'

She nodded, 'You played great Marlene'

Her best friend smirked in response, throwing her bat up and catching it, 'I think we have a real shot at the cup this year'

'Oi McKinnon!' shouted Sirius, causing both her and Lily to turn around, 'James wants to meet with all of us,' she rolled her eyes before turning to Lily and excusing herself, then proceeded to run towards the changing room, entering through the door as Sirius held it open.

XXX

Lily sighed, running her fingers through her hair irritably. She huffed before closing her transfiguration text book and standing from her table in the library. Lily had been hiding out in the library for the past two hours, ever since a celebratory party for winning the Quidditch match started, a doing of the Marauder's no doubt. They always managed to throw the most loud, obnoxious and distracting parties. She bid Madame Prince, the librarian, a goodnight before exiting the library and making her way back towards the Head common room.

However just as she passed the Gryffindor common room, a rather happy looking Marlene burst into the hall. 'There you are!' she shouted, catching Lily by surprise. 'You're coming in right?'

'Actually no Marlene, I was just thinking about going up to my common room and having a quiet night' she responded, attempting to continue on her way, however Marlene blocked her path.

'Oh no you don't, you're coming to this party' she stated, and before Lily could protest she was being pulled, with much force, into the Gryffindor common room. The room was loud, was very hot from all the people crammed into the room and smelt an awful lot like firewhisky.

'Marlene' she wined, 'I really don't want to be here'

After what felt like hours, Lily finally made her way across the room to the old table in which she always used to occupy. Marlene had left her a while ago to go talk to her teammates, although threatened Lily that if she left, Marlene would find her and drag her back, by her hair, to the party.

To Lily's discomfort, the music was so loud she felt her head that pounding. She groaned, placing her head down on the table, making an attempt to camouflage into the crowd of people, hopefully making herself invisible. However when she felt the table move slightly, she realized that she wasn't sitting alone at the table anymore, and lifted her head to find Sirius, lazily sitting in the chair.

'Please tell me you're not drunk' he stated, pleading in his eyes.

'Honestly Sirius' she replied, 'Being here would not be my first choice, Marlene's forcing me to stay and forced me to come. Most likely pay back for making her come to Slughorn's party, and I am certainly not drunk'

'Right' he agreed, 'I forgot, Lily Evan's doesn't drink'

'Exactly, but Sirius Black does, so why are you sitting with me when there's spiked punch and girl's floating around the room, definitely not thinking clearly. Honestly I would've thought you'd be out there enjoying this party' she said with a raised eyebrow.

'Usually I would be' he started, 'But it's my turn to keep watch'

'What do you mean?'

'Us Marauder's aren't that irresponsible, one of us is always sober, making sure things don't get too out of control. Unfortunately, I lost a bet and got stuck with the job this time'

Lily laughed lightly, 'What, Remus didn't volunteer to do it this time?' she questioned.

Sirius shook his head, a small smile creeping onto his face, 'Remus is never one to volunteer, he's not as good as you think he is, Remus is usually the one to come up with the pranks, he makes sure we don't get caught and is probably the first to drink at these parties. He just hides it well, unlike James or I'

'I'll start yelling at him too then alright?' she replied, jokingly.

'That's all I ask' said Sirius, a grin making it's way onto his face. Silence fell over the two as they both looked around the common room to see it a little more empty as a few people went up to bed.

'So where are the rest of the Marauder's?' asked Lily, breaking the silence.

'Well,' started Sirius, turning back to face her, 'James is by the fire, chatting up at least three girls, Peter's probably passed out on the couch, and Remus is no where in sight. Where's your gang?'

Lily shrugged, 'Alice is probably up in the dorm with Frank' to which Sirius raised his eyebrows, 'Mary is no where in sight, and Marlene's over there' she stated, pointing towards the corner of the room, where among five blokes was Marlene's small figure.

'You don't think Remus is off-' started Sirius

'With Mary' finished Lily, 'Definitely not, she is not that kind of girl and I doubt Remus is-' however with a sharp look from Sirius, she stopped mid sentence.

'Five Galleons' he demanded, 'That they're off snogging in a broom cupboard somewhere'

'Three' she responded, holding out her hand 'Three Galleons'

'Alright then, what about four?'

'No,' she retorted, stubbornly, 'Three'

'Not confident enough to bet more... I get it' he finished, reaching to shack her hand, however she quickly pulled it back.

'Seven then' she hissed, 'I'm positive you're wrong'

Sirius shook his head, 'I couldn't take your money like that, five will be fine' he smirked, quickly taking her hand before she could change her mind. Silence fell over the two, and Sirius watched as Lily's eyes scanned the room. Pausing however on an area then doing a double check, her eyes widening ever so slightly. Sirius quickly followed her gaze and then turned to face her, a foolish grin plastered all over his face, after seeing his best mate over by the fire with some sixth year.

'What?' Lily demanded, as he continued to look at her, grinning like an idiot.

'You so fancy him' stated Sirius, 'And you're jealous that he's snogging some random sixth year instead of you'

'I do not' she countered, 'I am not'

'Yeah, and now you're going to tell me that when you yelled out to James when the Bludger was about to hit him, you weren't scared for him, or worried at what might happen if it had' he sang, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

'I wasn't.. I mean..' however as Lily found herself not being able to put together a real sentence she hung her head in silence. Earning herself a bark of a laugh from Sirius.

'You should have seen James when he saw you with Amos' started Sirius, not much paying attention to what he was saying, 'When he saw you under the invisibility cloak snogging him, I swear he nearly through off the cloak and attacked Diggory'

Although upon spotting Lily, with her eyes wide open and her jaw dropping, he froze realizing what he had just told her. 'Invisibility... Eavesdropping... Watching when we... The Lamp?' Sirius found himself nodding, before hanging his head in shame. 'He seems to have no bloody problem snogging another girl in front of me however when it's the other way around he feels the need to watch and invade private matters' she muttered angrily.

'Now Lily-Flower, what James did was wrong, but you can't blame-' he quickly cut off however, when he spotted Peter Johnson, the seeker on the Quidditch team, close the gap between him and Marlene and proceeded to snog her. It was Lily's turn to follow his gaze and turn towards Sirius, anger fading and being replaced by a triumphant grimace.

'You fancy Marlene' she sang, laughing out loud.

'I do not' he stated, 'Sirius Black doesn't fancy, he only tells girls that to-'

'Yes' Lily interrupted, 'I've heard all about your reputation from other girls, I don't need to hear it from you now'

He smirked, leaning closer to her to be certain they weren't over heard. 'Exactly, so you know I don't fancy Marlene'

Lily shook her head, 'If you don't fancy Marlene, I don't fancy James'

After a few seconds of contemplation, Sirius' grin became even wider than before. 'Ha!' he shouted in triumph causing a few of the sober Gryffindor's left in the common room to glare at him, 'So you do fancy my best mate!' he added in a quiet whisper, as the attention diverted from them.

'And you fancy mine!' she replied, watching in delight as Sirius' smirk slowly fell from his face.

'You sneaking little girl' he started, 'You just tricked me!' Lily shrugged, her smiled never leaving her face. 'Alright here's the deal' continued Sirius, 'I won't tell my best mate that you fancy the pants off him, if you don't tell Marlene that I sort of don't want her to just be one of my snogging buddies'

Lily rolled her eyes, but agreed non-the-less. 'It's a deal' she answered, he eyes slowly sifting back towards James who had yet to come up for air, not going unnoticed by Sirius, although she quickly shook her head, before sighing and standing from her chair. 'I'm sorry to leave you' her voice stalled in what Sirius knew was the moment she had taken to come up with an excuse, 'I've got work... Marlene dragged me here, against my will, and now that she's busy snogging that bloke, well it's my perfect opportunity to leave.' Sirius cringed at the mention of Marlene snogging another bloke, 'Sorry' she muttered, 'I should have phrased that differently'

Sirius shrugged it off like it was nothing and spoke upon seeing her turn around, hoping to keep her there longer, 'Oh Evan's' he added, causing her to turn around and face him. He did a quick check to make sure no one was listening before walking over to her and whispering, 'Next time don't make up petty excuses, just bloody tell me you don't fancy sitting here watching Prongsy snog some other girl'

A small blush made it's way onto her cheeks before a sudden thought struck her. Sirius probably didn't want to witness Marlene snog another bloke, as much as she didn't want to see James do the same with another girl, 'Well Black, since I just know you'll be absolutely bored out of your mind once I leave, why don't you tag along'

He raised his eyebrows at her offer, 'Lily Evan's!' he gasped, 'You're not suggesting...'

She smacked him lightly on the forearm, 'Certainly not' she countered sounding slightly offended, 'All I was saying is that you tend to dangerous and wild things when you get bored, and as head girl, I should be doing everything in my power to stop that. The only way I can do that is to have you in my sights and since neither of us want to be here, for obvious reasons, I figured we should just go back to mine and James' common room' Sirius proceeded to glance around the room uncertainly, earning him an eye roll from Lily 'This party isn't getting any wilder. Just accept the bloody invitation before I change my mind Black'

'Alright, alright' he accepted, putting his hands up at his sides in means of surrender. 'Let's just go then, shall we' As Marlene and Peter proceeded to knock over a lamp, Sirius grabbed Lily's hand and pulled her from the common room, muttering something about not wishing to see what happens next.

It was only until they had rounded two corners did his pace finally settle and he dropped her hand. As they ventured on towards the Head's common room, they walked passed a broom closet, however stopped abruptly upon hearing strange noises. He raised his eyebrows in her direction, 'We really shouldn't' she started,

'But you're Head Girl' countered Sirius, moving closer to the door, 'You have to stop this kind of terrible behaviour!'

'Honestly, you partake in this kind of terrible behaviour at least three times a week. You would be bloody angry if I had pulled you from a broom closet, besides, it's usual James that takes care of these things, I don't fancy seeing... well seeing that' she stated, ushering to the closet as the noise became suspiciously louder.

'Come on Evan's' Sirius started, 'Aren't you the least bit interested as to who's in there?'

She rolled her eyes, 'Obviously you are, so if you want to know so much why don't you open it!'

'Alright then,' he agreed, a mischievous glint in his eye. Lily stood back and over to the side, preventing herself from seeing into the broom closet, while Sirius proceeded to swing the door open. There were two gasps and then Sirius' bark of a laugh filled the corridors. 'Lily-Flower' he said, through gasps of air. 'You have to see this'

Lily hesitantly made her way over to the broom closet, her mouth falling open upon spotting the couple in which her and Sirius had bet on earlier. 'Bullocks' she hissed under her breath. A small smile appearing on her face from Sirius' laughter.

'Lily I can explain-' started Mary, however she stopped short upon witnessing her best friend thrust her hand into her pocket and grudgingly pull out 5 galleons.

Remus was the first to figure it out, stepping out into the hall slightly, making in noticeable to both Sirius and Lily that he was shirtless. Sirius proceeded to smirk and raise both his eyebrows, muttering about how James was definitely going to hear about this. 'You bet on us?' he questioned, slightly appalled.

'Oh Moony' started Sirius, 'I just couldn't resist, Flower was going on about how responsible you are and well, it turns out I just know you better' he sang, happily accepting the galleons as Lily poured them into his hand.

Remus and Mary watched the scene, before turning to each other and shrugging. 'Well' said Remus, 'It's been nice chatting with you, however we have some business to be getting back to' the couple backed into the closet and started to close the door. To which Sirius just rolled his eyes, 'You might want to try a Muffliato charm,' added Lily before the door closed, 'Wouldn't want an uncomfortable encounter with McGonagall when she does her rounds check around 1am now would you?'

'Duly noted' replied a husky voice from the other side of the door. Sirius smirked, gazing down at her while they continued on their way to the Head's common room.

'You sneaky little girl' he stated as they approached the portrait, 'Remus isn't the only one who puts on a good boy attitude around professors, look at you helping those two break rules'

She rolled her eyes, muttering the password before walking into the common room, 'Those two have liked each other for years, it's about time they got together, I definitely wasn't going to stand in the way of that. Mary would've killed me,'

'A true friend you are' he responded, before there conversation was interrupted by a tapping at the window. Lily briskly walked over to it, opening the window and taking the letter from the Hogwarts's owl before sending it off. 'Who's that from?' asked Sirius, making his way over towards her and peering over her shoulder.

'The family' she replied simply, 'Most likely about the wedding'

'Wedding?' he questioned,

'Yes, my sister's, set to take place on the 25th of October'

However before he could respond, there were approaching footsteps and suddenly the portrait was opening. Thinking quickly, Sirius grabbed the invisibility cloak, that he had spotted hanging over the couch upon entering the room and Lily from around the waist, pulling her tightly into him throwing the cloak over them at the same time. James soon entered, with the sixth year girl not far behind.

'Wow' the girl muttered, 'This place is as brilliant as you described it'

James nodded, turning on the spot and taking the girl by the waist, Lily gasped slightly as realization, James made a small grunt in agreement, before leading the girl over towards the couch. Much to Lily's horror, who shut her eyes just as the sixth year pulled James down, by his tie, towards her. Sirius quickly noticed this and started to lead her over towards the portrait hole, both James and the sixth year were to wrapped up in what they were doing to even notice the portrait hole swinging open and quickly shutting.

'We're in the hall' stated Sirius, pulling off the cloak 'You can open your eyes' She did as told, sighing slightly in relief. Lily eyes widened as she realized that after witnessing that, James' best mate, had just figured her deepest secret.

'Where are we going?' questioned Lily, trying to play it cool 'I definitely can't go back in there' she finished with a chuckle.

He nodded in agreement, 'You'll just have to stay in our room tonight then,'

'Sirius Black,' she started, 'You aren't suggesting...'

'No!' he interrupted, as they turned the corner, walking past the broom closet once more. 'I'm not that kind of best mate that would snog the girl he's been pinning after for six years, plus you've already informed me that you're not that kind of girl. Plus, we have an extra bed since Prongs is staying in his Head's dorm' he stated as they both entered the Gryffindor common room, finding it completely empty apart from the mess everyone left behind. He sighed at the sight, taking out his wand and starting to magically remove the trash.

'I was kidding' she chuckled, dropping her gaze to the ground as a silence fell over the two and the only sound that could be hear was the slight crackle from the dying embers in the fire place. 'Sirius?' she questioned, in a barely audible whisper. 'Do you think they'll.. That James will..' he stopped abruptly, turning to look at her. Lily, if possible, hung her head even lower, a small frown creeping onto her face, figuring the wand she had just pulled from her pocket.

'Lily' he started, 'I don't know what they'll do, but I do know this. James, as much as it may seem, is not the kind of bloke to just do it like that, he wants to find that right girl and the girl we saw tonight was not her, she is standing in front of me' Lily blushed a deep crimson red before he continued, 'Now since you're going to be occupying the fourth bed in our dormitory tonight, the least you could do is help me clean up this bloody mess'

She laughed lightly before magically putting the furniture back in it's place, while Sirius continued to vanish the trash.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Lily was the first to awake in the dormitory, she quickly noticed that Remus had indeed returned to his bed at some point in the night, Peter was still sleeping, snoring loudly and Sirius looked as peaceful as ever. She made the bed and was about to head for the door when something caught her eye, lying open on the floor was a rather magnificent piece of parchment. Lily studied it, and watched as various foot prints with floating name above them walked around what looked to be Hogwarts. Her eyes eventually wandered over to the Gryffindor common room and up the stairs towards the boys dormitory, suddenly her heart dropped, there coming up the stairs rather quickly, was James Potter.<p>

She dived across the room, throwing the cloak over her just as the door swung open with a loud bang. 'Mates! Get up!' cried James, causing all the boys to stir, 'Boy do I have interesting things to tell you, last night I was with this girl, Annabel or Anna-Mary or something...'

Sirius was first to get up, shooting out of bed as quickly as possible, looking around wildly for Lily. He sighed when he didn't see her, however as James made his way across the room to wake the other two boys, Sirius noticed the map lying open on the ground, and there in the corner of the room, was an invisible Lily Evan's.

'Honestly mate,' grumbled Remus, sitting up in bed 'Can't this wait until breakfast, when you've showered. You smell like firewhisky and dirt'

James was about to protest however Sirius cut him off, 'Seriously mate, he's got a point' he agreed, 'When you walked in I thought something had died, there's no way in hell I'm going to listen to a word you have to say until you've showered, now get in there!' he ordered, pointing to their bathroom. With very little argument James obeyed, and not until the water finally started did Sirius make his way over to the corner where Lily was and pull the cloak off of her.

'Bloody hell!' cried Remus, 'Has she been in here this whole time?'

'Moony' muttered Sirius, 'Not a word of this to anyone, or else we tell everyone what we caught you and Ms. McDonald doing last night.'

He nodded, 'Alright, but you have a lot of explaining to do'

Sirius agreed, before turning to Lily, 'Get out of here, take the cloak and throw it in James' room. Whatever you do, don't get caught, if people hear about this, they'll only think the worst'

'Okay' she said, throwing the cloak back on, 'And thanks again'

The water stopped and Remus glared at Sirius disapprovingly, just as James emerged from the bathroom, jumping on a still sleeping Peter. He then quickly jumped into the story of his events from the previous night, Sirius mouthing to Remus that he would tell him later, when James wasn't there.


	8. Chapter 8

**_Sunday, September 27th_**

After returning to the Head's common room and throwing James' invisibility cloak haphazardly into his room, she quickly showered and dressed, before making her way down to breakfast.

The walk to the Great Hall seemed oddly different, the familiar buzz after a Quidditch game was no where to be found, in it's place were whispers and glares from multiple girl's thrown at Lily with every group she passed. She cautiously made her way down the marble staircase, stopping upon entering the Great Hall, when all eyes turned towards her. When she finally remembered how to move her feet, Lily slowly made her way over to where Mary and Marlene were seated, trying her best to make herself invisible however to no avail.

She quickly took her seat beside Mary, grateful as conversation slowly went back to normal. Her two best friend's stared at her as if expecting something, 'You can't honestly sit there and not tell us' hissed Marlene under her breath, making sure she wasn't going to be heard.

Lily put down the toast she had been spreading her favourite strawberry jam on and looked at her two best friend's, 'Where's Alice?' she asked, still confused at exactly what they wanted to tell her.

'Sitting with Frank, but we'll fill her in later' stated Mary, 'Just tell us what happened!'

'What in the world are you two on about?' Lily demanded, raising her voice ever so slightly.

Marlene then proceeded to turn to Mary and talk to her as if Lily wasn't there, 'Is she honestly going to pretend that she doesn't know?' she questioned, to which Mary shrugged.

'Of course, we were silly to think that being Lily's best friend's she would tell us' countered Mary.

Lily cleared her throat, 'I'm sitting right here you know?' she hissed, 'Would one of you please just tell me what's going on!'

Both girl's shared a look before turning back to their breakfasts, not daring to utter another word. Lily sighed, exasperated, mumbling under her breath about not being hungry before excusing herself from the table and making her way towards the doors however upon spotting her other best mate and her boyfriend across the room, she quickly changed course walking over towards them. Frank and Alice quickly stopped talking upon spotting her approaching them, 'Wotcher Lily' greeted Frank, watching as she plopped herself across from his, down beside his girlfriend.

'How are you?' asked Alice,

'Not so good,' she answered truthfully, 'would one of you please tell me why in the world everyone is bloody staring at me?'

'What do you mean?' questioned Frank, 'Surely you would know why' to which Lily shook her head, causing Alice and Frank to share a glance before turning back to her.

'Lily, did you not do unspeakable things with Sirius Black last night?' demanded Alice, hesitantly.

Heads turned as Lily dissolved into laughter, fighting to control herself but having to grab the table to hold herself upright instead. Alice and Frank watched her curiously, both grinning in spite of her. 'Have you gone mad?' she retorted, through gasps 'Me and Sirius, honestly is that what people are saying?' they both nodded.

'No' countered Frank 'People are saying that last night at the Gryffindor victory party, you two talked secretively and quietly for hours before he pulled you from the common room both of you grinning mischievously'

Lily snorted, 'Definitely not, we.. that did not happen.. nothing at all happened' she stated with a sigh, 'Who would believe that?'

Alice sighed loudly, 'Oh thank Merlin!' she cried, throwing her arms around her friends neck, pulling her into a very tight hug. This caused multiple people from all around the room to turn and look at them, however upon noticing who was creating all the noise, they shot Lily very annoyed glares before slowly going back to their breakfast.

'This is going to be a long few days' she muttered, slowly lowering her head onto the table, after Alice had finally released was only until Lily heard shouting from the Gryffindor table did she finally lift her head off the table.

'What do you suppose is going on over there?' questioned Alice, to which Frank just simply shrugged, 'The Marauder's never fight'

Lily turned to watch, along with the rest of the students. James appeared to be getting angrier by the second, while Sirius just sat next to Remus and took the yelling from him, not even bothering to defend himself. Lily swiftly stood from the table, knowing exactly what the fight was about, and made her way over to their usual spot at the Gryffindor table. Although before she could get there, she saw, gasping in horror, as James leaned across the table, delivering a swift punch at his best mates jaw. He then proceeded to whirl around and furiously marched out of the Great Hall, bumping her shoulder as he passed her, not even bothering to acknowledge her.

'What the bloody hell was that all about?' she demanded, coming up to the three remaining Marauder's, Remus and Peter sending her judgmental glares, as she leaded on the table.

Sirius gave her an exasperated look, his right hand holding the side of his jaw where he had been hit. 'Well, Flower. You would be right to assume that James just found out why the school is buzzing this particular morning'

Lily sighed, closing her eyes and taking a few death breaths before opening them once more. 'Let me see it' she demanded, turning to Sirius, who forcefully shook his head.

'How about' interrupted Remus, 'We go down to the kitchens, where were not feeding the rumour mill and where it's a little more private'

Both Lily and Sirius seemed to contemplate the idea, before he stood from the table along with Remus and Peter, then proceeded to follow Lily out of the Great Hall. They made quick work of walking down the halls and tickling the pair, before descending the stairs into the kitchen, making sure to ignore all the snide comments from other students as they passed.

'Alright' stated Remus, once they were all seated, and they had all asked the very kind house elf, Misty, for breakfast, having not eaten that eventful morning. 'What in the world happened between you two last night?'

Neither answered at first, while Lily forcefully removed Sirius' hand from his jaw to see it bruising, she quickly summoned some ice, holding it out for Sirius to take. However when he refused she took it to herself to holding it to his jaw. Finally the two turned towards Remus and Peter, sighing in unison before speaking 'Nothing to the extent of what you were doing happened last night' stated Lily, causing a small blush to creep up onto Remus' cheeks.

Sirius chuckled, 'Lily was dragged to the party by Marlene who ditched her half way through the night for that prick Peter'

'Hey!' retorted Peter, to which Sirius rolled his eyes.

'Not you Pete, the other Peter'

'Peter, the Gryffindor seeker?' questioned Remus, as Peter shrugged, digging into the breakfast they had just received.

'Yes' Sirius answered sharply, 'Anyway, after Lily saw..' with a nudge from her he stopped abruptly, 'After Lily saw Marlene and him snogging, she took it as her opportunity to get the hell out of there and since I didn't want to be left alone, dying of boredom, I followed her to the Head's common room'

'On the way' continued Lily 'We ran into you, and then later in the common room, we ran into James and.. ' her voice caught in her throat, and after a deep breath she proceeded. 'James and that sixth year'

'But he didn't mention running into you this morning?' said Remus, after swallowing the food in his mouth.

'Ah' stated Sirius, winking his trade mark mischievous wink, 'That's because we were under the invisibility cloak' His eyes widened, as he witnessed Lily look away from them, dropping her gaze to her lap, still lightly pressing the ice to Sirius' jaw.

'And you saw.. all of it' he questioned lightly,

'No' replied Lily, 'We saw enough though..'

Remus quickly reached across the table, putting his hand comfortingly on top of Lily's as he ushered Sirius to continue, 'Well, I bought Lily back to our dorm where she feel asleep in James' old bed'

'But how does that explain this morning, with the cloak?' demanded Peter, having most likely been filled in by Remus later that morning.

Sirius shrugged and the three boys turned to Lily, 'I.. well.. I saw James' coming up the stairs on that map of yours.. don't get mad, I didn't mean to see it, it just kind of happened'

'Were not mad' urged Sirius, putting a comforting arm around her waist.

'You were bound to find out sometime' added Remus. 'With all the time you'll be spending around us'

She smiled, 'Well.. I quickly grabbed the invisibility cloak and threw it over myself just as James entered the room' they all nodded, taking slow bites of their breakfast as a comfortable silence fell over the group.

'So.. what do we do now?' she questioned after swallowing,

Sirius sighed, 'We wait, James will come around and demand an explanation, which I will happily give to him and the rumours will be guaranteed over by tomorrow' he assured her.

XXX

Later that evening in the Head's common room, Lily sat at her favourite table in the back, near the window with the prefect view of the grounds, and James sat on the couch by the fire, plainly ignoring her.

'So' she stated casually trying to make conversation, 'I was thinking that we should have the first Hogsmede weekend on the 24th, you know, so everyone can get candy and things in preparation for Halloween' James grunted in response, not bothering to lift his head. 'I guess I'll just go ahead and talk to McGonagal then'

James just ignored her, however as silence fell upon them once again, she felt herself start to break the promise she had made to herself at the beginning of the year, to not be to temperamental and mean, however as anger built inside of her, she felt it harder to contain, eventually exploding, frighting him with her furious tone. 'What the bloody hell is your problem anyway!' she hissed, slamming the book she had been reading closed.

'Honestly' he retorted, just as angry, turning towards her. 'I don't really care what day you want to set Hogsmede so you can go on a date with your new boyfriend' she rolled her eyes. 'Besides it's not like Sirius couldn't just take you any time he likes'

'Sirius is not my boyfriend' she cried, watching as he stood furiously making his way towards his dormitory.

James made a sound of exasperation, 'It's no secret' he hollered 'You don't have to lie to me!'

'Lie to you' she echoed, watching as he stormed off up the stairs towards his dorm, slamming the door loudly behind himself.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Monday, October 5th<em>**

The next week passed painfully slow, and as Sirius had predicted, things eventually did go back to normal as the school was buzzing with the most recent news of gossip the next day, involving two Hufflepuff prefects getting caught after hours. James, however, did not get over the gossip as fast as everyone else, spending the next few days, blazing around the school angrily. The three other Marauder's eventually confronted him, forcing him to listen as they told him everything he thought to be true as complete bullocks. Problems between them were solved almost instantly after and the four of them quickly went back to there mischievous ways, playing a prank on the Slyterins in happiness.

Sirius' jaw did heal over the next few days and, to his enjoyment, he got much sympathy from the girl's around Hogwarts. However, although Lily would never admit it to anyone, she still hurt from witnessing James snog that sixth year. He had apologized many times, whether it was for that or not, however it didn't seem to make a difference.

Lily quickly shook out of the trance she had been in, just as Marlene took her seat next to her and their defence against the dark arts teacher, strutted into the room. She inwardly sighed as the Professor angrily slammed the books he had been carrying onto his desk, causing all students in the class to stop talking immediately. All but four boys, that sat at the back of the classroom, directly opposite from her and Marlene. 'Alright' he cried, catching their attention, 'I've had enough of you four' They all looked at him questioningly, 'And detention just doesn't seem to do the trick with any of you, so Mr. Black, change places with Mr. Longbottom, Mr. Lupin please change places with Ms. McKinnon'

'But sir' started Marlene, 'That's completely unfair!'

'All you have is your classmates to blame Ms. McKinnon, now switch' he ordered, 'And Mr. Potter, change places with Mr. Abbott'

Lily bid her goodbyes to Marlene as she among other people were forced to give up they're spots to separate the four Marauder's, then greeted Remus with a cheery smile, as he took the spot next to her. 'Sorry about that' he muttered, which she shrugged off like it was no big deal.

After instructing the class to open their manuals to page 394, their Professor took out the famous projector in which the Marauder's had once charmed to fly about the class room every time someone tried to turn it on, resulting it to slam into one of the walls, never working the same again. The class watched with anticipation as he fuddled around with the object and tried their best to hold in their laughter as it refused to turn on.

Lily rolled her eyes at the classes behaviour turning her attention back to the manual and quickly skimming the page. 'Werewolves?' she muttered to herself, 'Did we already learn all about them back in third year'

Startling her slightly, Remus responded 'We did, but I imagine we're going over them for Newts like we did in fifth year for Owls'

Lily stared at Remus, transfixed as he paled slightly once the projector turned on a ferocious pictures of werewolves were displayed for the class, she pretended not to notice as the three other Marauder's flashed him sympathetic looks from their spots in the classroom.

The professor cleared his throat, catching the classes attention before starting, picking up the textbook and waltzing around the classroom. 'As the textbook clearly states, werewolves are human beings who, upon the complete rising of the full moon, turn into a fearsome and deadly near-wolves. Werewolves can be easily distinguished from regular wolves by several small distinguishing characteristics, such as the pupils of the eyes, the snout shape, and the tufted tail. At all other times, they appear as normal humans, though will often seem to be ill as the full moon approaches.'

The Professor continued to read through the passage written in the textbook, much to the bore of the students, issuing a few yawns and multiple eye droops. To Lily's displeasure, she listened as the Professor would occasionally add in his opinions, predigesting against werewolves. She glanced disbelievingly around the classroom to see not one other student even paying the slightest bit attention, however she did see out of the corner of her eye as Remus sank lower and lower into his seat as the Professor threw him occasional knowing glances.

Before Lily knew what she was doing, she was on her feet and all eyes were suddenly on her. Her palms got sweaty and her voice caught in her throat before her Gryffindor courage prevailed. 'You're wrong' she stated plainly.

'I beg your pardon' demanded the Professor, setting the textbook down on his desk.

'You're wrong' she said, a little louder than before. 'As is anyone who thinks the same way' Most of the students looked rather confused at her accusations however, she felt Remus make an attempt to pull her back into her chair.

'She doesn't mean that Professor' added Remus, flashing him an apologetic grin, however she pulled her arm from his grasp, crossing them over her chest.

'Yes I do!' she retorted, 'I won't sit here and listen to him be predigest towards-'

'Sit down Ms. Evan's' he ordered interrupting her, however she did not obey. Lily could feel the eyes of her classmates on her, however she refused to drop her gaze from the Professor.

'Lily' begged Remus in a whisper, 'Please, please sit down'

The Professor seemed to be ignoring her, continuing on with the lesson. Lily rolled her eyes in response, crossing her arms over her chest, standing her ground. 'Werewolves are terrible, fearsome beasts-' he started however Lily quickly interrupted him,

'They are only creature by night of the full moon however the other 353 days a year they are normal wizards or witches like us'

'There are far from normal' the Professor countered, 'Their transformations-'

'A werewolf has no control over their transformation, most unlike anamagi, they are cursed to turn into these terribly misunderstood creatures' retorted Lily.

'Ms. Evan's this is your final warning, sit down!' shouted the Professor, however as she remained standing, he slammed his fists down on his desk, turning angrily towards her 'If given the chance, they would probably rip their best mate apart limb from limb' he added,

Lily scoffed, releasing a bitter laugh 'With each full moon the wizard or witch no longer remembers who she or he is. They have no control for who they are 12 nights a year, although these people should be honoured!' she cried, 'They are some of the most, courageous and strong people to ever roam this planet.'

'Detention Ms. Evan's!' he hollered, causing most of the students to gasp.

Her eyes wide with shock and Lily stood there, frozen in shock, for what seemed like hours in her mind. Suddenly, she was throwing her things into her book bag, rather haphazardly, 'Lily?' questioned Remus 'What are you doing?'

'Leaving' she responded furious

'You can't leave!' he hissed

She stopped and glared at him disbelievingly, 'There's no way I'm going to sit here and listen to him speak in such bad terms' then without another word she found herself briskly walking towards the door. As she marched passed Sirius, she heard him mutter her name however continued on her walk, when Lily walked by James, she felt a close hand grabbed her wrist although with a tug she was free and at the door in seconds.

'Ms. Evan's' shouted the Professor, 'If you leave this classroom there will be serious consequences'

Without even a seconds thought, she turned the nob and was out of the classroom and down the hall before the professor had time to dock house points.

XXX

'Moony' whispered James urgently as he and the Marauder's, along with all the other students, made their way towards the Great Hall for lunch after defence. 'Do you think Lily..-'

'I don't know Prongs' he responded, defeated, 'I just don't know'

'But she can't know' retorted Sirius,

Remus quickly stopped in his tracks, lowering his voice so it was barely audible, 'Not here' he said

'It was just a coincidence mate' agreed James, ignoring Remus.

'Prongs' Remus stated, scaring his three other mates, 'Not here!'

* * *

><p>James along with Sirius and Remus walked hurriedly into the Head's common room. 'You don't think she would have been expelled?' demanded James, after noticing that Lily hadn't shown up to lunch.<p>

'No' started Remus, unconvincingly, 'She wouldn't be, we've done much worse things'

'Yeah' agreed Sirius, 'But we've never spoken to a Professor like that'

They all shared a nervous look before James pulled open the portrait, bounding into their empty common room. He glanced up her staircase, noticing her door had been left open, which is never was. 'Lily?' he called, to which no one answered. James walked up the first few steps, 'Lily?' he repeated, however still no answer. He quickly climbed the rest of the stairs, knocking on her door before pushing it open.

He heaved a great sigh upon seeing all her belongings still in their rightful places, 'Prongs?' questioned Sirius, who had followed him up the stairs.

'She hasn't been expelled' he stated happily, 'All her things are still here!' his best mate peaked into the room, nodding in agreement before retreating down back into the common room, James following close behind.

Remus was sitting on the couch in front of the fire, deeply emerged in the book he had picked up that had been resting on the table, bookmarked to a certain page. 'Hey Prongs' he asked, as the other two took their usual seats, 'Is this yours?'

James shook his head, 'No, that's Lily's' he stated, 'She's been reading that one for a while, I recon she borrowed it from the library nearly a month ago'

Remus nodded, flipping to the next page, 'Why?' questioned Sirius, 'What's in there?'

'She's reading, about healing charms' he finished, slightly confused, 'There's wand movements and everything in here, instructions on when to use them, how to use them, when they won't work, certain things to avoid'

'So?' said James 'What's it matter?'

Remus shrugged, closing the book and placing it back on the table. However before any of the three boys could make more conversation, the portrait hole swung open and in stormed a furious looking Lily, stopping dead in her tracks upon spotting the three of them seated on the couches looking up at her expectantly. 'Where in the bloody hell have you been?' demanded James.

'Where do you think I've been?' she replied sharply, 'I was with Professor McGonagall and Dumbledore'

'You didn't get expelled, did you?' asked Sirius, holding back his worry.

She shook her head, to which the three boys sighed, 'Honestly.. expelled.. for that?' she responded, slightly amused, 'You three have done much worse'

'Well then?' questioned James, 'What were you doing talking to them?'

'Lily' interrupted Remus, 'Please don't tell me you went to them about this..'

'Of course I did Remus,' she replied, seating herself in her favourite arm chair, 'Our Professors aren't just alloud to do say horrid things like that, and once McGonagall had gotten over the shock that I had left on top of speaking back to a teacher she finally listened to what I had to say. She then called in Dumbledore, who, told me that he would speak to the Professor'

'So you spoke back to a teacher' started Sirius, 'And you got off with no punishment'

Lily rolled her eyes, 'I still have to bloody serve the detention with that git' she replied darkly, 'It's going to be horrible, I just know it'

'Do you recon he'll get sacked?' questioned James,

'I bloody hope so' responded Lily, 'For what he said, he should'

'I suspect he just won't get hired back next year' said Remus, to which everyone agreed. 'After all, Dumbledore definitely wouldn't be able to find a new Professor at this time of the year'

Lily stood from the chair and stretched, 'Do you recon there's still lunch?'

'No' stated James, 'But you can always head down to the kitchens' she nodded, considering it. However James also stood, 'Come on, I'll go with you, didn't eat much at lunch myself'

She agreed, leading the way out of the common room. James smirked at his best mates, before bounding out of the room after her. 'I can't believe she did that' stated Sirius, to which Remus agreed.

'I never thought I would see the day when Lily got a detention' he added.

'So do you think she knows?' asked Sirius,

'She might' he replied, eyeing the book that lay on the table once more, 'After all she is the brightest witch of our age, I wouldn't be surprised if she's figured it out already'

'It's a good thing though Moony' Sirius agreed, 'She doesn't seem to mind either way' to which Remus nodded, before he stood, exiting the common room, shortly followed by Sirius.

* * *

><p><strong>Review please! I would love to hear from you! <strong>


	9. Chapter 9

**_Thursday, October 15th_**

For the countless time that night, or morning, depending on how you looked at it, Lily Evan's tossed and turned in her bed. She had tried everything, counting sheep, flipping over the pillow, she had even tried flipping over her blanket. Nothing had worked, and she lay in bed, if possible, more awake then she had been five minutes ago.

Angrily, she sat up, roughly tossing her pillow to the other side of the room, then rolling her eyes upon realizing that she would eventually need to get out of bed and retrieve it. Anger melting into frustration, she collapsed back into her mattress, firmly shutting her eyes and willing herself to fall asleep. She counted every second, the feeling as if she had been trying to sleep for hours overwhelming her, when truthfully it had only been a few minutes.

She glanced at her watch, _2:06am_, _I have to sleep_, she willed herself,_ I simply cannot write a potions essay having not slept all night_. As she scolded herself on her incapability to sleep, ironically, she started to feel tired once more. Her eye lids became heavy and slowly her body curled into the comfortable position she couldn't find earlier. Just as she felt herself enter that dream state, where reality becomes hazy and her dreams become more real, they faded away, all too quickly, and even with her eyes closed, she could see the dullness of her dorm room return her to reality.

There was a howl and she shot up into a sitting position, a vague thought growing larger and larger in her mind before realization suddenly hit her. She quickly tore of her blankets, placing her feet on the cold wooden floor, too determined to notice the unpleasant shock, marched over to her window and pulled open the curtains. Revealing, just as she suspected, a full moon.

Somewhere in the back of her mind she had known it was a full moon, there were signs of course, however the whole student body, aside from a few teachers and the Marauder's, paid no attention to them, just like she had done that whole day. Remus had been short tempered, extremely tired, weak and craved chocolate for the past day and a half, however she had been much too wrapped up in her world of essays and tests to notice. All of a sudden she felt a wave of guilt wash over her, there was no way she could help him, she fought against herself, _you could've been there for him, _her mind retorted _even if he doesn't know you know, you could have at least snuck him some chocolate from the kitchens or something. _

She sighed, sitting down on the corner of her bed, a brief thought crossing her mind about how James, Sirius and Peter deal with his transformations, _surely they know, _she contemplated. However her questions were answered all too quickly as suddenly she heard various figures shuffling into the common room just down the staircase from her room. There were moments of furious whispering then she heard someone quickly bounding up the staircase and lightly knocking on her bedroom door. The culprit of all the noise had pushed open her door ever so slightly, and she sighed, 'Come in' she stated, all too cheery for, glancing at her watch again, _2:25am. _

It was James, however she could have easily mistaken him for someone else. He limped into the threshold of her room, muttering nervously under his breath, before his silhouette looked up at her and he spoke, 'I need your help' he stated, bluntly, however the terror in his voice made her stand and walk towards him, placing a reassuring hand on his arm. A gesture that clearly said, _go on, you can tell me. _

'You have to promise me you won't ask questions and you won't tell anyone' he stared at her, what she thought would be intently, however it was quite dark in her room, the only light from the common room down the stairs and the glow of the full moon.

'You have my word' she agreed, and all to quickly he nodded.

'You are going to need your wand, it's Sirius, he's badly hurt' he could have sworn he had heard her gasp quietly, before quickly turning around and making her way through her dark room, grabbing her wand and a healing book that she had picked up for light reading a few weeks ago.

She turned around and nodded to James, who quickly exited the room and made his way down the staircase, Lily close behind. She gasped upon seeing Sirius lying limply on their couch, deep gashes throughout his whole body, arms, legs, chest, everywhere.

Lily knelt down beside the couch, opening the book to the page she had bookmarked and held out her wand, holding it over the more dangerous looking wound and muttering various incantations under her breath. 'James' she demanded sharply, 'There's a knife in the left desk drawer, I need it' there was shuffling behind her, and soon a shaky hand held out the blade in front of her.

She quickly took it, putting down her wand and lifting the shirt Sirius was wearing before using the knife to cut in apart. 'Lily' started James, 'I have to go'

'Where in the bloody hell-' she hissed, however stopped abruptly upon remembering the promise, _no questions, _'Alright' she stated, 'Go, do what you have to do'

He thank her, making his way to the portrait hole, 'Wait' she cried, getting to her feet and marching over towards him, she raised her wands, saying many healing charms before nodding to him. 'Now you can go'

'Thank you' he stated, before running from the room. She found herself smiling, however frown deeply upon remembering the situation at hand, determined she whirled around to face Sirius' bloody and scarred body once more.

She could heal most of the wounds, but they would reopen unless she used some potion, sighing she realized the inevitable, she was going to have to sneak up to the Hospital Wing and take a bottle of healing potion.

She watched as Sirius' breathing settled and slowly went back to normal. Then Lily Evan's got to her feet and made her way out of the common room, casting a Disillusionment Charm before pushing her way through the portrait into the corridors.

Lily quickly walked down the hall way, trying her best to move as quick as possible without making a sound. However as she descended the third staircase she realized that it was a useless idea, there was no one in the corridors at this hour. _Probably close to three, _she thought. Before she knew it she was standing in the hospital wing, having slowly pushed open the doors she quickly made her way towards the medicine cabinet, moving around favourite small bottles of pain releaver, and bone growth medicine.

After what seemed like ages of debate, she grabbed a bottle of Dittany, a bottle of pain releaver and one of the many chocolate bars before slowly making her way out of the room, closing the door quietly behind her.

As she reentered the common room, her Disillusionment Charm already taken off, she saw Sirius awake, sitting up and looking at the remains of his shirt. 'You know' he admitted upon seeing her, 'This was my favourite shirt'

She rolled her eyes walking towards him, 'You can always mend it with a simple charm' she countered

He just shrugged in reply, 'Not really a point now, it's in a bunch of pieces and covered in blood'

'Your blood, I might add' interrupted Lily, however he continued on as if it didn't faze him.

'Plus I'm rubbish at charms'

'I thought that was James' she asked, unstoppering the first bottle,

'It's a chain effect, we're both rubbish at it and since Moony rarely lets us use his notes, or takes notes for that matter..'

'You could always take your own notes' she suggested, however he just chuckled in agreement, 'Yeah I didn't see that happening' she agreed.

'I don't even know why you brought it up' he quipped,

'Alright' she started 'Lie back down, I need to put this on the cuts'

'They're hardly cuts, more like deep bloody gashes throughout my whole body' he retorted, following instruction and lying down, 'I don't see why you have to put that stuff on it though, you've done a fine job'

She rolled her eyes 'I don't want the wounds to reopen,' Lily stated, eyeing the dittany in her hand, 'It's gonna sting a little bit' she warned him, however he seemed unfazed. Lily poured some of the potion open all the open wounds and watch as they healed themselves even more. Sirius hissed under his breath every time the liquid make contact with his skin, but refused to show pain.

'Are you alright?' questioned Lily, to which Sirius nodded, sitting back up, with her help. 'Now this,' she stated, handing him another bottle.

Sirius eyed it curiously, 'What is it?' he slurred, attempting to make out the small print on the bottle.

Lily sighed, taking the potion from his hand and condguring a mug, pouring exactly half of the bottle over. 'It'll ease the pain a bit' she stated, passing him the cup, which he quickly gave back to her.

'No need' he retorted, 'I doesn't hurt, honest'

She rolled her eyes, forcefully handing over the cup once more, 'Alright then, it doesn't hurt, but for me, would you please?' He shook his head, causing her to angrily place the cup down on the table in front of them, 'Fine then,' she stated, picking up the healing book from the ground and proceeding to read, 'We'll just sit here until you drink the mug'

Frustrated, Sirius stared at the mug, contorting his face to one that hide the pain he was feeling. There were sharp stabbing pains that faded on and off all over his body, however the most pain came from his chest and after another shock of pain, in which he found himself grasp his side and hiss in pain, he quickly snatched the mug from the table, downing it quickly.

In less than five minutes, the pain was slowly starting to fade away, when suddenly a thought occurred to him. 'Lily?' he questioned with a raised eyebrow turning towards her. 'Where exactly did you get the potions?'

Her eyes shifted nervously as she blankly stared down at the page of her book, 'I.. well.. you see..' she started, avoiding his gaze, 'I just didn't know.. what to do.. exactly.. you were bleeding a lot and J-james was gone'

He put a hand on her knee, 'You took them from Pomfrey didn't you?' he whispered, to which she nodded guiltily.

With one look in her direction Sirius burst into laughter, 'It's just' he explained at her confused expression, 'We borrow from her all the time, seeing as this kinda stuff happens more than you like it would'

She smiled along in spite of him before turning back to her book. Seconds later it was torn from her hands, 'You're not actually going to sit there and read all night are you!' he demanded, haphazardly throwing her book across the room.

Lily crossed her arms, 'Well, clearly not now' she replied, sarcastically. 'Well then, what shall we do?'

'We could play exploding snap' he suggested, which she responded by making a disgusted face. 'Or chess'

'I rubbish at chess' she explained, to with he groaned quietly.

'Alright then' he stated, perking up 'Tell me a secret then'

Lily looked at him, slightly confused 'I'm sorry?'

'Tell me a secret' Sirius repeated, causing Lily to flush, the mention of secrets was too much for her, since she had too many.

Quickly she rose from the couch, 'You don't suppose James has exploding snap cards?' she questioned, however he quickly grabbed her around the waist and forced her back into her previous position.

'I don't want to play exploding snap anymore, I want a secret' he wined.

Lily crossed her arms over her chest, 'Why don't you ask one of your, _fellow Marauder's_, for a secret'

He was too quick to respond, and Lily felt her argument getting weaker and weaker, 'They're busy, plus, there are no secrets between us, they tell me everything'

She nodded, thinking a moment before a grin grew on her face, 'So you've told them then?' she questioned

'Told them?'

Her smirk, if possible grew bigger, 'That you fancy Marlene'

Silence filled the room as Sirius tried and failed multiple times to come up with a clever retort, opening and closing his mouth many times while Lily just watched extremely satisfied with herself. Sirius huffed angrily, and made an attempt and standing from the couch however with one single movement he felt a terrible pain flow it's way through his foot all the way to his forehead. He groaned, clutching onto his side, muttering furiously about his inability to get up and walk away.

Lily's eyes widened when she realized how much pain he was in, making a fuss as he breathing became quicker and his eyes remained tightly closed. She was quickly to make sure that none of the wounds had reopened, and she, once again, forced a cup of pain relief potion into his hands, which he drank much faster than the last.

'And for the record,' gasped Sirius, placing the cup on the table, 'I do not fancy Marlene' She laughed, a cheerful, high pitched laugh, that caused a smile to grow on Sirius' face no matter how much pain he was in. 'Fine' he stated, hopefully passing off as a slight bit angry, 'I fancy Marlene, as much as you fancy James'

Lily gasped, and a smile flashed across her face, before disappearing, changing into a scowl. 'I do not..' she started, however stopped short, there was no possible way for her to win in this situation. 'Luckily,' she stated, getting to her feet, 'I can walk away'

'No' he protested, attempting to reach out and grab her, however retracting his arm as pain resurfaced. 'Stay, I didn't mean it' Reluctantly, she walked back over towards the couch, seating herself down at the end of it. 'But I don't know why you don't just tell James,'

'Because, I do not like him!' she retorted,

Sirius rolled his eyes, letting out a bitter laugh, 'Yes, so it didn't bug you at all when you saw him snogging that sixth year the other night' Lily's eyes widened as she bit back another retort, dropping his gaze and looking to the floor.

'You want to know why' she demanded sharply after a few moments, 'For that exact reason, he goes around kissing random girl's all the time! How do I know I'm not just some random girl!'

'No!' interrupted Sirius, 'You're not just some random girl to him, he's been wanting a date with you for over three years. Lily if you were just another random girl he would have given up by now, he likes you. He really does'

She shook her head stubbornly, 'No, he likes the idea of me. The unattainable, fiery red head, that has always turned him down!'

For the second time that evening, Sirius found himself at a loss for words. _Next time_, he thought, _when Lily comes up in conversation, knowing James she will, I'm definitely going to think twice before saying things like, she's never given it a second thought or stating that she's heartless.._. Suddenly, a terrible memory came rushing back to him.

His own voice echoed in his head while he stared at Lily, who once again, made a huge effort not to meet his gaze. **_'I might break a different girl's heart every week, but you've broken my mate's heart everyday for the past five years! You probably wouldn't know what that feels like since you don't even have a heart to begin with, if you had you would give Prongs a chance! You know what, you're right Evan's, we're not even close to being the same person, you are much worse than I am!' _**

Sirius reach out, placing a hand on her arm, causing her to finally look up at him. Deep down inside he could have sworn there were tears in her eyes, however chose not to mention it, inside he spoke, 'You're not heartless'

'Sirius..' she started, urging him to stop however he put up a hand to silence her.

'I mean it Flower,' he said 'What I said to you on the train, well I didn't know what I was saying, I guess I was just angry after seeing my family at the train station, who didn't even look twice when seeing me. And tired, from James' constant talk about you all through the summer. I just took my anger out on you and I'm really sorry, truly sorry'

A small smile grew on her face and she leaned into hug him, however she lost her balance on the sofa along the way. Lily then proceeded to fall off the couch, right onto her back side. Sirius looked down at her completely shocked, before the two of them burst into uncontrollable laughter. It only increasing when Lily accidentally whacked the side of her head against the table, causing a small little red bump to appear.

Lily was laughing so hard that sparks started to fall from her wand and what she would later swear was a complete accident, a blue spell shot from her wand, making contact with Sirius. The pair of them froze in shock as Lily watched in horror, as the tips of Sirius' hair slowly faded into a light blue, creating a chain reaction and turning his whole head baby blue. 'What happened?' asked Sirius, not being able to see his hair, however once more Lily dissolved into laughter. Through gasps of air managing to non-verbally condgure a mirror.

As Sirius stared wide-eyed into the mirror, Lily spoke 'You know, I never really pictured that colour to actually suit you' Quickly he grabbed his wand off the table sending a hex in her direction, which she easily blocked.

'Change it back!' he cried,

Laughter creeping up on her once again, she made her way around to the other side of the room, using other objects to hold herself up right. 'I' Lily started, wiping tears from her eyes, 'I don't know what spell I used'

Furious, Sirius stood and before Lily could protest, he sent another hex her way. 'You are so going to pay for this' he said, a mischievous glint in his eyes. A battle issued between the two of them, Lily easily blocking every jink Sirius sent her way, however laughter kept creeping up at her, as she pictured Sirius wearing big red shoes and a nose, jumping around on a Pogo stick.

As she doubled over in laughter, Sirius disarmed her, but her laughter didn't stop. He approached her as she rolled around on the ground, sending a spell her way and magically removing all her hair.

Suddenly her laughter stopped, and she stopped up looking absolutely furious, which only made Sirius laugh harder. 'Change it back!' she screamed, after seeing herself in the mirror. Although he just shook his head in response, she fiercely grabbed her wand from the ground and pointed it at him, through multiple jinx in his direction. Lily smirked, holding back her laughter, as he stood from the ground, wearing clown make up, big baggy pants, and big red shoes.

* * *

><p>James walked back to the common room under his invisibility cloak, sporting a wicked cut across his shoulder and was extremely happy to think, that in just a few moments, he would be able to collapse into his four poster bed.<p>

Half asleep, he muttered the password to the Head's common room, and traipsed over to the staircase that leads to his dormitory, however he stopped short upon hearing a rather large snoring noise from the couch. Backing up in his path, his eyes scanned over the common room, to see Lily, curled up in the arm chair, sleeping peacefully and his best mate, lying spread eagle on the sofa. He stood for a moment, chuckling at the pair of them before transfiguring two blankets and heading up to bed.

In a few hours, before they went to breakfast, he would ask Lily to take a look at his shoulder, and they would go see Moony. Putting on happy faces, to make him believe that last night went smoothly, (although he wouldn't, he never believed them, whether they were telling the truth or not).

He quickly pulled of his shirt and removed his shoes before jumping into bed, falling into a deep slumber. Thinking to himself just as the sun started to make its way over the horizon, that today, ignoring it's rocky start, would be a good day.

* * *

><p><strong>Another chapter for you,<br>It would make me oh so happy,  
>For a Review! :)<br>**


	10. Chapter 10

**_Saturday, October 24th_**

'Prongs mate' said Sirius, following James through the Head's portrait hole into the common room, 'What are you on about?' He shrugged in reply, plopping himself down in his favourite arm chair just as Peter and Remus came running in after them.

'I'm just saying' he started explaining for the fifth time that morning, 'That I think we should just tell Lily'

Remus nodded, taking a seat on the couch, while Peter looked around nervously before seating himself on the floor, his back to the fire. 'Now why would we go and do that' demanded Sirius, standing over the three of them, arms crossed. 'Once you start telling people, they tell people and before you know it everyone is going to be running-'

'Padfoot!' hissed James, cutting across him, sending him a disgusted glare.

'I was saying' he continued, running a nervous hand through his hair, a habit he picked up from James 'They would be running towards us because no body really cares about-'

'Just stop' interrupted Remus, 'You and I both know that if people find out, everyone will hate me and run away. I'll probably have to leave Hogwarts and never show my face around -'

'Both of you!' stated James, getting to his feet. 'Just be quiet!' Sirius made to protest however James quickly covered his mouth with his hand. 'Do you hear that?' he inquired

There was a slight humming and all four boys looked at each other questioningly before Remus spoke, 'Lily's not upstairs is she?' he asked, to which James just shrugged in reply. 'Dammit James!' he hollered getting to his feet, 'What if she heard you, what if she heard _both_ of you.'

'Moony, just calm down' started Sirius, however Remus continued to mutter furiously under his breath.

'She's one of my best friends outside of this group!' he stated, 'I can't loose her, I've already lost so much because of my stupid lyancorthepy.'

'Remus,' started James, 'She's not that kind of person to just give up on her friends like that'

'Are you really trying to tell me that she would be happy hanging around a monster for the rest of her life? No! She wouldn't! She would have to be out of her mind!' he cried in retort

'W-we don't m-mind' muttered Peter, from the corner of the room where he had backed into.

Remus turned furiously towards him 'But you're all out of your minds!' he stated before turning back to James and Sirius, 'And don't you think I didn't have these same thought with you three, because I did! Don't you think that I'm over reacting because I'm not!'

Suddenly the room fell silent and all that could be heard was Remus' panting from all the yelling he had done. Just as James was about to say something, he heard Lily's door open upstairs and her light footsteps descending into the common room. They all shared nervous glances before she emerged into the room. She stopped abruptly upon seeing Peter curled up in the corner of the room however didn't question it, 'What in the world is going on?' she questioned, making her way around the room, picking up various objects, 'What were you four screaming about?'

Neither of the four of them answered as they watched her, with arms full of different books and quills, turn towards them eyebrows raised. 'Nothing, we were just-' James stopped speaking as he realized that his best mates were glaring at him, 'Chatting' he finished lamely.

She nodded, 'Well alright, must have been a pretty exciting conversation with you four making all that noise' she hummed quietly to herself as she scanned over the books on the shelves. 'And Sirius how are you?'

'How am I?' he repeated.

'Yes,' she agreed, inquiring for an answer, 'How are your cuts, they haven't reopened have they?'

'Cut?' Remus questioned, raised eyebrows.

Sirius cleared his throat awkwardly, 'Good' he whispered, 'I'm good'

Lily nodded, 'And James?'

'Also good' he responded sharply.

She flashed them a smile before turning back to the shelves, 'Lily?' questioned Sirius, 'What exactly are you doing?'

'Packing' she stated plainly.

'Packing?' Remus repeated, slightly worried, imagining the worst. _'I figured out you are a monster and I can't live to be near you' , 'My parents are making me come home because I told them what you were' , 'You disgust me so much that I'm leaving'_

'Yeah' she stated, dread in her voice, 'My sister's getting married this weekend so I'm going back home for a few days' Remus sighed audibly, 'I tried to convince my parents to just do the wedding without me, it's not like my sister wants me there anyway, but they're ordering me to come home. I was sure I told you that already'

The three boys shrugged in unison, 'When are you back?' asked James,

'I should be back late Sunday night, or around lunch on Monday' she answered, making her way towards the staircase, 'Oh and Remus,' she asked, turning around, 'Would you mind if I borrowed your notes on Monday, that is, if I do miss any classes'

'Yeah' he replied, 'It's not problem'

'You're a life saver, honestly what I would do without a friend like you,' Lily started, smiling in spite of herself, 'Well, I just don't know.' She crossed the room to her staircase and slowly start to ascend, closing her dormitory door once inside.

The moment James heard her door close tightly, he burst into laughter, chuckling while making his way over back towards the couch. 'Honestly Moony' he stated, putting his feet up on the table and his hands behind his head, 'You worry too much'

XXX

Half an hour later, they heard her door open once more and down marched a frustrated Lily, holding two different colour dresses. 'Alright,' she stated, walking around the couches to stand in front of the four boys, 'White?' she asked, holding up the knee length, strapless white dress white a small flower design around it's waist, 'Or Black?' she questioned, holding up a plain, black dress that fell a little longer than the one before.

They all regarded her completely bewildered, 'Flower,' stated Sirius, 'Wouldn't you be better off asking Marlene, or Mary, or Alice?'

She sighed, running a frustrated hand through her hair, 'Yes, but as you can see, they aren't here' she huffed, once again, holding both dresses against her body and asking 'White or Black?'

'White' Sirius responded, however James quickly shook his head

'No, black' he countered, 'The white is too short'

Lily rolled her eyes, looking at Peter, who didn't dare meet her gaze, then Remus. 'Neither' he responded, getting to his feet, 'If you wear the white, you'll look to much like the bride, if you wear the black it will look like you're dressed for a funeral'

'It's my sister's wedding, it may as well be a funeral' she retorted under her breath, however after observing the two dresses she sighed, 'You're right' before angrily tossing the two dresses aside, and groaning. 'That's it' she stated seconds later, 'I'm not going!'

Sirius, James and Remus all sighed together before turning towards her, 'Alright,' said Sirius, getting to his feet, joining Remus. 'Let's go see what else you have in that closet of yours'

She looked at him, her mouth hanging open in surprise as Remus pulled her towards the staircase, Sirius following closely behind. James quickly, along with Peter, got to their feet and followed the others.

Lily was forced to sit on her bed while Sirius went through the cluster of dresses hanging in her closet. Remus stood next to Sirius, watching his every move, while James had seated himself next to Lily and Peter had occupied her desk chair.

Within five minutes Sirius had sorted through half her closet, showing her various dresses which she was quick to refuse. 'What!' demanded Sirius, pulling out an extremely short pink frilly dress, 'Is this?'

She snorted, getting to her feet, and taking the dress from him. 'I can't believe I still have this!' she cried, a smile growing on her face as she remembered the memory, however it quickly faded once she realized the four Marauder's were staring at her in complete shock. 'I had to do with a bet back in fifth year between Marlene and I'

'Alright' started James, 'Now I'm interested'

'Yes' agreed Sirius, 'Please to explain'

Remus took over going through the rest of the dresses as Sirius and James sat on her bed while she explained the story behind the pink dress. 'Well I bet Marlene that by the end of fifth year, she would snog a certain bloke, although she thought the idea was completely ridiculous. So together we created this' she said, gesturing to the dress in her hand, 'And the loser had to put it on and run through the school'

'How did we miss this!' cried Sirius.

James rolled his eyes, pushing his best mate off the bed, 'So who lost?'

Lily smiled mischievously, 'I'm sorry' she answered, 'But I can't answer that, I made a promise'

Before either of the two Marauder's could protest, Remus pulled a dress out from behind her school robes, 'Lily' he stated, turning towards her, 'This one' She walked over towards the boy, taking the dress from his hands.

'I forgot I brought this' she exclaimed, 'I don't even remember what this looks like on me' she whispered under her breath, completely mesmerized with the dress in hand.

'Gone on then' stated Sirius, getting to his feet and pushing her towards her bathroom, 'Put it on'

She stopped quickly, 'Now?' she demanded

James quickly got to his feet walking over towards the pair of them and helping his best mate force her into the bathroom, 'Now' he repeated, closing the door tightly behind her, after shoving her into the room. 'It's not too short?' whispered James to Remus as she change.

'No' he responded

'Or too.. interesting'

'No Prongs'

'Or too-'

'Why don't you just see for yourself' interrupted Remus, turning James around to face Lily. He stood in complete shock as Sirius made her twirl around to fully take in the dress. I was a sweet heart neckline, floor length emerald green dress, that matched her eyes perfectly, it clung to her body nicely however just above her waist the dress fell downward, puffing out ever so slightly. There was a thin band that wrapped around under her bust, he eyed her up and down and had the sudden erge to run his hands all over her, to hold her, to kiss her.

'I guess that's a yes' chuckled Sirius, as Remus lightly punched James' arm.

Quickly he tore his eyes away from Lily, shaking out of the state he had been in, 'What's a yes?'

'I asked you if you liked the dress' repeated Lily,

'By the way you couldn't keep your bloody eyes-' Sirius quipped, however quickly stopped after a sharp elbow in the ribs from James.

'It's great' he stated, taking a step towards her, 'You look absolutely beautiful' Lily quickly dropped his gaze, turning around to look at herself in the mirror. She stared at herself, adjusting bits of the dress, her hand eventually wondering up to her neck, that all of a sudden, looked extremely bare. As if reading her mind, she looked into the mirror to see James looking through the small drawers of jewellery on her desk. He turned towards her, holding out a simple, gold locket. Lily nodded, turning around so her back was to him, 'Will you?' she asked, however he had already undone the clasp.

She moved her hair out of the way, as James swung the necklace around her neck, having a bit of trouble with the clasp from his shaking hands although worked through it. He looked at her in the mirror, noticing once again how breath taking she looked, and noticing how good they look there, standing next to each other.

Unsure of how long they stood gazing in the mirror, however James hand had some how found her waist and it was again there where he felt the erge, to hug, to hold, to kiss her.

Sirius cleared her throat pulling the pair of them from their thoughts, Lily's eyes widened in the mirror and she whispered a small thanks before rushing into the bathroom to change once more.

James whirled around to come face to face with his three best friends, all arms crossed, all raised eyebrows. He made to speak however before he could even make so much as a sound, Sirius cut over him, 'We will talk about this later' he stated, dropping his arms as the door to the bathroom opened and Lily emerged, holding the dress.

She tossed it quickly into her bag and zipped it closed, picking it up and walking towards the door, stopping abruptly when she realized she wasn't being followed. 'You know, I would rather you four not be in here'

'Say no more' interrupted James, guiding his three best mates out of the room and down the staircase. Lily smiled, closing the door behind her and following the four Marauder's back into the common room.

'Thank again for the help' she said, as the four Marauder's retook their previous positions, making her way towards the portrait hole. They all nodded in response, however the portrait hole quickly swung open and in stumbled Marlene.

'Lily' she cried, 'I'm so sorry I'm late! Come on let me help you find a dress'

'Marlene' Lily replied, pushing past her, 'Don't worry about it, but I really have to be going now or else I'm going to be late, it's going to take me forever to walk down to the Hogwarts gates'

'You know' interrupted James, getting back to his feet, 'I could always fly you down their on my broom'

Lily laughed at the ridiculous offer before thanking the four Marauder's and pushing past Marlene. Once the portrait hole closed tightly behind her, Marlene turned, arms crossed, towards the four boys. 'Trying to steal my best friend are you?' she inquired, seating herself next to Sirius on the sofa. 'Well, which dress did she choose?'

Remus made to answer however Sirius cut across him, sending James a mischievous glance in the process 'We'll tell you, if you tell us'

'Tell you what?' she demanded,

'Who lost the bet in fifth year, and who had to run through the school in the pink thing' stated Sirius.

'It'll be easy enough for you to figure out' countered Marlene, 'Did we snog in fifth year?'

Sirius looked at her completely shocked, and slowly his smile faded away, 'Padfoot' demanded James, leaning forward in the arm chair, 'Did you?'

'I' he stated, 'I can't remember' they all groaned, while Marlene sat next to him, beaming. 'I've snogged a lot of girl's since then'

The other three boys huffed angrily as Sirius tried to remember, Marlene however, sat on the couch completely pleased with herself and after a few moments of watched Sirius think she burst into laughter, soon followed by the others.

* * *

><p>After exiting the boundaries of Hogwarts, Lily turned on the spot and apparated, the Hogsmede village quickly disappearing and turning into her childhood street. Fixing her bag on her shoulder she began to slowly make her way towards her house.<p>

With each step a new memory formed in her mind taking her back in time, she passed their neighbours house, an old lady used to live there and smile at her each time she passed on her way home from school. She passed the park, where she had first learned about her abilities, where Severus and her had spent all of their time. Quickly she forced herself to think of something else, the bus stop where she always caught the bus to school, the fence that Petunia had once fallen off of, breaking her elbow in the process.

Soon she was walking up the familiar steps that lead her onto the front porch, smiling to herself, excitement bubbling inside her, she pushed the door open. 'I'm home' she called through the house, however no one responded. She set her bag down, hanging her coat in the closet before walking down the hall into the kitchen.

Immediately she was met by the smiling face of her father, 'Lily-pad' he exclaimed, getting up from the kitchen table, where he sat reading the paper, to greet her. She quickly ran over to him, pulling him into a tight hug, 'Oh I've missed you so much' he was quick to pull away, 'Now' he stated, eyeing her, 'Let me look at you'

A small blush crept onto her cheeks as he pulled her close once more, telling her that she had grown up to be a beautiful young woman. They pulled apart after hearing a door slam above them, and muffled shouting. 'Your sister's a little stressed' he explained, pulling out a chair for her. 'I suggest you drink lots of tea, it definitely helps'

Lily laughed, 'If that's your way of offering me tea, I would love some' she said, 'You wouldn't believe how cold it's gotten out there'

'You wouldn't believe how crazy it's gotten around here' he countered, filling the kettle and placing it on the stove.

She smiled, picking up the paper he had been reading, 'Oh, I think I just might'

He quickly sat down in the chair he had previously been sitting, 'So, Lily-pad' he stated, taking the paper from her hands, 'What's new, tell me everything'

'Everything?' she inquired, 'Well I've kept you and mum up to date in all my letters, I don't really know what to tell you'

'You could tell me about that boy' he countered, looking at her over the rims of his glasses.

Lily looked slightly taken aback, 'What boy?' she demanded, 'There's no boy!'

Before her father had the time to question her further, her mother had burst into the kitchen, 'Lily dear!' she exclaimed, walking over towards her and pulling her up into a hug 'I thought I heard you come in! Oh we've missed you so much!'

'I missed you too mum' she said, pulling away and seating herself once more in her chair.

The kettle started to whistle and Lily quickly shot up out of her chair, ordering her mother to sit while she fixed their drinks, 'So tea?' questioned her mum, 'What have you two been talking about? Something serious I bet'

'Honestly Mum, how do you get serious from tea?' answered Lily, as she grabbed four mugs from the cupboard.

'Whenever there's tea brewing in this house, you just know it something serious.' stated her mother, 'So.. What is it you were chatting about?'

Lily's father cleared his throat, 'Lily-pad was just about to tell me about that boy she been writing about'

Her mother's face lit up at the mention of him, 'Ooh!' she squealed, as Lily took her seat across from her once more, handing them both their teas, 'James, is it?'

Lily sighed, sipping her tea, 'There's nothing to tell, he's my co-head' she stated, 'Just a friend, I assure you'

Her parents eyed each other before both turning back to her, 'He doesn't seem like just a friend' her mother countered, with much agreement from her father. 'By the way you describe him dear, I would say you fancy him' Lily blushed slightly, much to her parents enjoyment, however before she could come up with a cleaver retort her sister burst through the kitchen doors, frowning upon spotting Lily.

'Oh you came did you?' she demanded, 'It's so fortunate that you could, I was thinking that you wouldn't be able to'

'No' Lily said, 'I just had to talk to a few people, pull a few strings, they were completely alright with it'

Petunia nodded, grabbing an envelop off the table and exiting the room, muttering a barely audible, 'Pitty' under her breath, that didn't go unheard by neither Lily or her parents.

'Well' stated her father, 'We're happy that you could make it' Her mother nodded in agreement, before finishing off her tea, 'However, this James is probably devastated that you've left him'

Lily rolled her eyes, sipping her tea once more, and picking up the paper, clearly intent on ignoring her parents and any other comments they had towards her _secret love for Mr. Potter, _as they so put it.

* * *

><p>Lily made her way up the steps of her great aunts house, where Petunia had decided to hold the reception. However from Lily's perspective her great aunt didn't live in a house, a few years ago, when they had officially informed the family that she was going away for the year (off to Hogwarts, however they couldn't tell them that), her aunt had bought an extravagant looking mansion. Equipped with a large dinning hall where the meal would be served along with twenty-seven other rooms, and to Lily's frustration a large walk way, that made it's way around the entire garden before finally reaching the front door. She pushed the small gate open at the beginning of the walk, carrying her plain white heals in her right hand while balancing the six bags of rubbish her sister had insisted on her bringing to the house.<p>

She had driven herself to her aunts when her sister and parents had left her to wake up to a empty house to find a note on the fridge, explaining where to be and at what time to be there. So here she was, promptly at 3:30pm, pushing open the grand doors into the threshold of the house. 'Hello?' she questioned, jumping slightly when her own voice echoed back.

'Finally' shouted her sister, coming down the hall rather angrily, 'Where have you been!'

'What are you on about?' asked Lily, 'The note said to be here at 3:30-'

'No!' retorted Petunia, looking into the many bags Lily held in her hands, 'The note said to be here at 1pm'

'It definitely did not' said Lily, however her sister paid no more attention to her, and had painfully started to take the multiple bags from her arms. Not expecting this, Lily fell off balance, sending most of the bag crashing to the ground. Petunia looked at her in horror, when the four bags came in contact with the floor, followed by the sound of shattering glass and other unhealthy noises.

'What do you think you're doing!' shouted Petunia, examining the damage of the objects. 'You've barely been here two minutes and you've already started ruining things for me!'

'Don't worry' started Lily, 'We can fix this'

Without thinking she pulled her wand out of her purse, giving it a small flick and watching as ever object that had broken was quickly pieced back together. Realization suddenly hit her when she set eyes on her sister's face, that if possible had grown even angrier. 'You freak!' she cried, pushing Lily back forcefully into the wall behind her, 'Get this through your small brain, there will be absolutely none of this abnormality tonight, at my wedding, or ever again! If you ruin my wedding, I'll ruin you, and that's a promise.' Sighing as Petunia whirled around and stormed back down the hall way, Lily picked up the other things, before following her down the same hall way.

She was put to work over the next two hours, setting tables and running around the massive house before the guests arrived. Slowly but surely as the hours passed the guests soon began to arrive, Lily made it her job to greet them, however they all did their best to ignore her, sending her dirty looks as she took their coats.

It was a small rehearsal dinner, her sister had placed her at the farthest table with their bosses friends and old high school friends that they hadn't seen in years, she questioned the fact on how her parents even allowed her to be placed at this table, however dropped it upon remembering how stubborn her sister could be. Petunia had purposefully placed her at the table that didn't belong, as a terrible reminder that she was different and truthfully didn't even feel welcome in the muggle world.

The food had been satisfactory, obviously their table got to eat last and the food had already been sitting in the kitchens for over an hour. Lily joked to the old man across from her, who had excused himself various times to the loo, that it would have been better off if they had just given them the frozen food instead, he failed to see the humor, and she quickly turned back to her plate, pushing the items around, not daring to eat them. There was only three others seated at the table fit for at least ten, all who had chosen to sit as far as possible away from her, excluding her from all conversation.

She sighed, taking another sip of her water, _maybe I should have accepted James' offer to accompany me here, _she thought, watching as the tables across the room, laughed together, toasting to the bride and groom, _yes, I definitely should have accepted the offer. _And just when she thought it couldn't get any worse, the night made a quick turn in the other direction and she felt a small smile grow on her face when she witnessed the empty chair beside her being pulled out and a familiar face seating himself down next to her.

'You know' stated the voice, placing a glass of champagne down in front of her while sipping his own_, _'I heard this rumor' Lily raised her eyebrows, picking up the glass and sipping it before muttering a quiet 'Oh' urging the man to continue. The man nodded in reply, 'It turns out that the sister of the bride is here, no ones heard from her in years, only heard the terrible stories from her Petunia'

'Oh really?' questioned Lily, putting down her half empty glass, 'And what are these stories the dear bride has been telling people may I ask?'

'I once heard one that said her sister had attempted to rob a bank but was caught, getting herself locked up in jail, although that one wasn't all that believable. The one that everyone seems to be contemplating, is that Lily Evan's, the kind, generous girl we all once knew, finally snapped and out of fear her parents sent her off to the all girl's school for disobedient children'

'And which one do you believe?'

He shrugged, draining his glass, 'Neither' he replied simply causing Lily to break out into a huge smile, the man mirroring her face. He quickly pulled her into a hug, 'Lily!' he whispered, 'Years, I haven't heard from you in years!'

He pulled back to see her eyes slightly redder, 'Jacob, I'm sorry' she muttered, not making his gaze. 'Something big happened, and I can't.. I mean.. I wanted to tell you.. but I couldn't you see'

'Yes because best friends always keep secrets from each other' he hissed sharply, 'Honestly, how do you think it felt, one day we were skipping stones in the small river by the park and the next day my best friend had skipped out on me'

'Jacob, I-' she started, tears threatening at her eyes.

'No' he interrupted, 'Forget it, I didn't come over here for an explanation, It doesn't matter. All that matter's is that your here, well and alive' Jacob quickly put down his champagne glass, pushing his chair back from the table and gazing down at her. 'Come on' he stated, holding out his hand 'Let's dance'

'Jacob' she responded, 'Can you even dance at these things?'

'People dance at weddings all the time'

'Yes, but this isn't a wedding, it's the rehearsal dinner' she countered

Sighing he took his seat once more, 'Alright fine,' he stated, 'You win, but tomorrow however, come hell or high water, you and I are going to get up and dance, even if I have to drag you up there' Smiling she complied, 'Good, tomorrow we dance and catch up, the toasts are about to start so I better retake my seat'

'It was really nice seeing you' she called at his retreating back.

He turned around baring a smile on his face, 'You too Lils' he replied, weaving his way around the many tables. _Maybe, _she thought, _this won't be so bad after all._

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I've been gone the past few weeks and unable to write or post anything for that matter. Anyway, I was back this weekend and did some writing, however I'm going away again for the next two weeks. <strong>

**I scrapped something together and came up with this chapter, so please Review, I hope you like it, and have a great few weeks! **_  
><em>


	11. Chapter 11

'Now wait just one minute!' interrupted Jacob, crossing his arms over his chest while Lily continued to laugh at his expression, 'I absolutely did not kiss Amelia Yakcovitch at the end of forth grade'

'You did' countered Lily, voice rising in excitement, a joyful laugh threatening in her throat. 'You came over to me after it happened, and you gushed for the next half an hour, how it was, and I quote, _the perfect first kiss._'

Jacob violently shook his head as he downed his second glass of champagne, 'I think I would remember my first kiss, and that definitely wasn't it' Lily once again threw her head back in laughter, he smiled in spite of her however it quickly faded. 'You know what I don't get Evan's'

'Don't call me Evan's' Lily protested sharply, he shrugged in reply.

'What I don't get _Lily_, is that here you sit, in front of me, after disappearing off the face of the earth for six, seven years..' he stated, 'Now I'm not going to hiss at you like I did yesterday, I admit, it may not have been the best way to approach the situation, but we talk today like we talked all those years ago. It's like you.. Like you were never gone' he finished in a whisper.

'I-'

'Now I know you can't tell me exactly _what _you've been up to' he reasoned, cutting across her attempt to speak, 'But as my best friend I still expect some effort'

'Well, if you're going to make such a fuss about it' she sighed, putting on a face. 'And for the record, we can talk like we were never apart because we're such good mates'

Jacob crinkled his nose at her, as if smelling something rather disgusting. 'No, that's definitely not it'

Lily flashed him a smile, 'Now, I don't want to go boring you with my life story' he snorted in response, 'No! I'm serious!' however with an exasperated eye roll from Jacob she quickly added, 'Alright fine, I'll bore you, but only after I hear what you've been up to these past years'

'Alright, if that's the only way I'm going to hear about you, then fine' he stated, throwing his arms up in surrender. 'Well then, where to start, where to start' he muttered, playfully tapping his chin as he mimicked searching through the deep insides of his brain. 'The morning after I ran into your sister who had told me that you had died'

'What?' demanded Lily, eyes widening in horror, 'You didn't believe her did you?'

'Of course not!' he laughed, 'I was only joking' Lily huffed, folding her arms over her chest as he continued to chatter on about the many escapades him and his new best friend Michael had gone on. He told her about the teachers and the students, mostly the female population, which he had apparently gotten along well with. So good that he had his fourth girlfriend by January of that year. However, as interesting as his stories were and as much as she wanted to hear every single detail, Lily couldn't help herself from gazing around the room ever so often, letting her mind wander.

She noticed her sister seated with her new husband across the room, she watched as she laughed, her smile actually reaching her eyes, and as she frantically wiped tears from her eyes scared that they would ruin her makeup once again. In truth, Lily hadn't seen her sister that happy since the evening before she had received her Hogwarts acceptance letter. Suddenly she felt jealously anger grow inside of her, _Why did I have to get that stupid letter?_ _Why couldn't I just be normal for once? Why can't we just get along like we used too? _And then there was a voice, much like her own, screaming at her from inside her head. _What are you on about? _It demanded, _That Hogwarts letter saved you. You didn't belong in the Muggle world, they didn't like you! You should be thankful it came, that it is you who is lucky enough to study Witchcraft and Wizardry at the best school for Witches and Wizards there is! You would've never have met your best friends, Marlene, Sirius, Remus, Alice, Mary and even Peter.. You would have never met James. _Lily gasped audibly, and suddenly she was overwhelmed with guilt.

'I know right' stated Jacob, 'Absolutely unbelievable' Lily nodded in agreement, smiling along as he continued on with his story once more, now telling her about how some other bloke tried to snog his girlfriend.

Lily once again found her gaze wandering around the room, her eyes scanning right over her sister and husband to fully take in the room. It truly had been a beautiful wedding, her sister's dress made her look like she had fallen out of one of those fairy tale books her mother used to read to her. She had smiled the entire way down the aisle, she carried a red rose that matched those all around the room. Lily swore she even saw her sister with tears shining brightly in her eyes as Mr. & Mrs. Dursley strutted back down through the rows of chairs together for the first time. She hoped that she would live forever happily, like she knew her sister would.

'Earth to Lily' hissed Jacob, waving a hand in front of her eyes pulling her from her thoughts. 'You've been staring down at your hand for so long I thought you were trying to summon a ring onto your finger'

Lily laughed, a small blush creeping onto her cheeks, 'She really does look absolutely lovely tonight' she admitted, gesturing to her sister.

He shrugged, 'She looks alright, I guess' he mumbled, 'Not nearly as good as you do' she quickly waved off his complement, shaking her head in disagreement, however before he could put up more of a fight, a small humming started in the corner of the room slowly turning into a louder sound, until the speakers suddenly filled the room with a fast waltz.

'Now, ladies and gentlemen, if you would please turn your attention to the dance floor, The Dursley's will share their first dance together as a married couple.' said the announcer.

All to quickly people had gotten up from their chairs and hustled over to the edges of the dance floor. Lily watched as her sister slowly allowed herself to be led towards the floor by her husband, and chuckled as he failed to spin her around properly, occasionally stepping on her feet. Soon the whole room was trying very hard to contain their laughter, and before Lily could fully register what she was doing, she pulled out her wand and cast a quick charm onto Vernon, turning him from a foot crusher into the most brilliant dancer the room had ever laid eyes on. She watched with joy as the slight frown on her sister's face turned into a huge grin, causing the whole room to erupted into cheers as the song came to a close. The two once again took their seats as the band got up on stage, tuning their instruments and tapping on the mic, before a wave of jazz music spread across the room.

'Now come on then' Jacob said, a small smile growing on his face, and extending his hand for her to take 'You made a promise remember?'

She nodded, taking his hand and allowing herself to be pulled to her feet then led to the dance floor, 'And for the record,' continued Jacob, twirling her towards him, 'You would have looked ten times better than Petunia did in your mother's old wedding dress' Lily stole a glance at her sister, who appeared to be glaring at her with a furious look.

Choosing to ignore it she turned back to Jacob, shrugging in the process 'I don't believe I could have even come close to how beautiful she looks tonight'

'Oh but you did' he whispered into her ear, spinning her round and round, watching as the dress and her hair when flying around with her. He laughed at her beauty, before pulling her quickly towards him, taking in every aspect of her face. Without thinking he slowly edged his face close to hers, her close breathing encouraging him on, eyes lightly closing just as they were inches apart.

'Get out' she hissed, causing both Lily and Jacob to jump in surprise neither having seen Petunia walk up behind them.

Lily looked utterly shocked, dropping her arms from around Jacobs neck and allowing herself to be dragged from the room by her sister. 'What are you on about?' she demanded, as she pulled her into the coat room, frantically searching through them.

'You heard me!' retorted Petunia disdainfully, snatching Lily's coat from a rack and throwing it, with much added force, at her. 'Get out of here! You've ruined everything!'

'I've ruined everything?' she echoed in shock, 'How? may I ask'

'I gave you one rule, and you had to go and break it! I will not tolerate your freakish behaviour at my wedding, this is my day, and you've gone and bloody ruined it with your magic! I knew it was a mistake to have invited you, mum and dad promised me that you would control yourself and just be normal, but I should have known better than to believe them! It's who you are, you're a freak!' Shouted Petunia maliciously, while Lily stood in shock, still holding her coat in her arms, as her sister stood, eyes furiously glued to her. 'Now get out!'

'Tunie, I was only trying to help' Lily pleaded, 'People were laughing, I had to do something, I couldn't-'

'See that's where you're wrong, you didn't have to do anything! We were getting along just fine without you' Petunia countered in a condescending manor, 'And don't call me Tunie, you lost that privileged a long time ago'

'Alright then' Lily breathed, after a few moments of silence, 'I'll go if that's what you really want' She turned on the spot, pulling open the coat room door, walking down the hall with her head hanging towards the man in an expensive suite stood to open the door.

'And don't bother coming back' she heard her sister yell after her, 'Ever, we'll be far better off without my freak of a sister hanging around our family' Without another word, Lily allowed the door to be pulled open for her and she tore out into the windy October evening, frantically pulling on her coat as she quickly ran down the steps.

Just as she was about to turn on the spot and disaparate to her family home to grab her luggage and leave note to her parents, she heard her name being calling out behind her. and she whirled around to see Jacob running out after her. 'Lily?' he cried, 'Where in the bloody hell are you going?'

'Home' she answered simply.

He nodded, 'Oh alright, well maybe I'll stop by then tomorrow? Around noon?'

'No' she interrupted, 'I mean- I won't be there, that place hasn't been my real home for seven years Jacob'

'Then where are you going?' he demanded, slightly worried for her well being.

She hung her head, zipping up her coat in the process, 'My school is my home, and I don't know when I'll see you again, or if I will ever see you again. So please, live a strong and happy life for me, succeed in whatever you do, I really have to go' Lily finished, turning around and proceeding to walk down the side walk until she was out of his view, however she felt a hand in hers and suddenly she was turned around facing Jacob once more when he smashed his lips against hers.

Lily stood in shock for a few moments, before her brain finally kicked in and she pushed him off of her. She observed how he stared at her, taken aback and slightly embarrassed, 'Goodbye Jacob' she finished, before taring down the sidewalk at a very quick pace. Disaparating the moment she was sure no one could see her.

* * *

><p>Lily watched as her family home faded away and she felt the uneasy, but familiar, pull, twist and squeeze of aparation. Suddenly she felt her feet hit the hard ground below, and slowly the long winding road leading to the Hogwarts castle came into view. She sighed, pulling her wand from the small bag slung around her shoulder and muttering the proper spells that allowed her to enter the grounds that Professor Dumbledore had shown her upon her depart. The tall, rot iron gates parted slightly, letting her pass, before closing tightly behind her. Lily glance up towards the warm castle, and determinedly, she wiped the tears from her eyes and marched up the hill, her long emerald green dress dragging behind her, collecting mud with every step she took.<p>

A small smile threatened at her cheeks when she pushed open the huge door just enough to let her pass through and enter into the castle. Lily made quick work of walking to the Head's dormitory, desperately wanting to shower and collapse right into bed, however upon muttering the password to the portrait, she was met by a unexpected surprise. As she pushed through the hole she heard a deep chuckle, which could only be the Head Boy's, followed by a higher pitched giggle. Lily felt her heart plummet into her stomach and a small lump begin to grow in her throat, _No! _She attempted to convince herself before turning the corner, _It can't be, it's not true. _

She took a deep breath and turned the corner, coming face to face in which what she feared most. She stood in shock as James quickly pulled his lips off of Jessica Phillips', another Gryffindor in their year that always seemed to be challenging and constantly trying to outshine Lily. She looked extremely displeased by his removal, while James scampered to the other side of the couch, trying extremely hard to hide the blush on his cheeks.

'Lily!' he exclaimed, recovering from the surprised and embarrassment, pulling Lily from her stated in the process. 'You're early!' She stared at him quizzically, 'I mean..You're back!' he quickly corrected himself. She nodded her head in agreement, making an effort not to roll her eyes. _I am definitely not in the mood for this, _her eyes rolling on their own this time.

'How was the wedding?' he questioned her, trying to fill the silence.

Lily shrugged, taking her bag over towards the bottom of the stairs, catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror as she passed. Seeing that most of her makeup had run down her cheeks, leaving big black streaks, and her dress, torn and splattered with mud, she figured that James could answer that question for himself, but answer none-the-less. 'If you must know, it was absolutely dreadful'

'Oh?' he said in what seemed as forced disbelief, 'Is there anything I can do?' he offered, jumping off the couch, stepping over Jessica and facing her.

She shook her head violently, 'No, that's really not necessary. If you don't mind I'm just going to quickly grab a few things and then I'll be on my way' James nodded, turning back towards the couch and taking his spot once more as Lily climbed the staircase towards her bedroom. She quickly pushed her door open, closing it softly behind her before angrily tossing her bag across the room, causing it to knock into her bedside table sending a picture of her and her parents at Kings Cross station, first year. She rushed over to the broken frame, placing it back onto her table, not bothering to fit the crack. Instead she grabbed a pair of comfortable sweat pants and a t-shirt, her wand from her bag and left her room, descending the stairs to find James and Jessica still sitting awkwardly, as far as possible, from each other on the love seat.

'Would you happen to know where Marlene is?' she questioned, not even batting an eyelash in his direction. She waited with a hand on the portrait for an answer.

'Last time I saw her, she, along with Remus and Sirius were headed off to Gryffindor tower, you know it's after cur-'

'Thanks' she muttered, pretending she didn't hear his warning about curfew and quickly exiting their common room, into the cold, dark hall way.

She didn't linger long in the corridors, determined to get to the Gryffindor common room as fast as possible, but just as determined to prevent herself from running down the corridor at full throttle. The fact that she knew it was after curfew, didn't seem to bother her as much as if would have last year. She turned sharply round a corner, catching herself by surprise when she bumped right into a lanky figure with shoulder length, greasy, jet black hair. 'I'm so sorry' she started, getting to her feet and extending her hand to help the boy up, however she quickly retracted it upon spotting who it was. 'On second thought..'

'Lily' stated Snape, scrambling to his feet and stepping in front of her, 'How have you been?' he questioned, eyeing her up and down, that made her extremely uncomfortable.

'Not now Severus,' she started,

'Why are you such a mess?' he interrupted sharply, 'Did Potter do this to you, because I swear..'

'He didn't' she cut across him, making an attempt to push past him, however all too quickly she heard more footsteps from the other end of the corridor. Snape swore under his breath, then muttered something about them being early, before worriedly looking up at Lily.

'You have to get out of here' he stated, pushing her further down the hall.

Lily, however, planted her feet and whirled around to face him, 'I don't have to listen to you' she said sharply, 'Besides it's past curfew, all of you should really be in bed'

'Please Lily' he begged, 'It's not safe, go get a teacher or something, even Potter and his gang will do, just not alone.. they'll easily hurt you, or at least try'

She sighed, 'Alright, I'm going'

He beamed, 'Oh and Lily, for the record, I am truly sorry'

'You worn out sorry a long time ago, Severus' and with that she quickly tore down the hall towards the Gryffindor tower.

XXX

Sirius sat with his arm lazily looped around Marlene's waist, preventing her from positioning herself in any other way besides resting her head on his chest, seated with her legs draped over his own. However her position didn't prevent Sirius from occasionally reaching over to where Remus was seated in the arm chair beside them, frantically flipping through a Potions text book talking quick and clear notes from that days lesson, to snatch the page from him, or hit the book to the floor, making it virtually impossible for him to get any work done. Although just before he could shout at Sirius for the fifth time that evening, Peter's eyes widened as he watched the Marauder's map.

'What day is it today?' he questioned, looking up at his three mates.

Sirius rolled his eyes, turning his head towards Marlene to plant a light kiss upon her cheek as she too flipped through a novel. 'It's only Saturday, Pete' replied Remus, picking his book up from the floor once more.

'But isn't Lily supposed to be getting back from her sister's wedding tomorrow?'

Marlene looked up from her book, 'Yeah, Pete, she is' she stated, raising an eye brow in question.

'Then why is she currently headed towards the Gryffindor common room?' he demanded, indicating her spot on the map.

'What?' cried Marlene, jumping up off of the couch and running over towards where Peter was seated, following his finger where indeed Lily Evan's was headed towards them. 'This can't be right!' she stated picking the map off of the table and bringing it over towards both Sirius and Remus, 'It has to be a mistake, right?'

They both scoffed in protest, 'The Map is never wrong' Remus retorted.

'I honestly can't believe you would accuse of such thing,' agreed Sirius, 'It's like you think we're a bunch of stupid pricks'

Marlene rolled her eyes in response, handing the map to Remus, as he further examined it. 'You don't think that she knows about James and Jessica, do you?' All three boys stared at her blankly for a few moments before she slowly turned around, to see Lily standing in the common room, only a few paces behind her. 'Lily!' she cried, much like James had done only minute before, 'You're back!'

'And so glad to be' she added, walking over to the couch, and throwing herself into the arm chair across from Remus. She sighed as she fully took in her surroundings, _it's good to be home, _she thought to herself.

'So' Marlene started, pulling her from her musings, 'Why are you back early? Is everything alright?'

Lily smiled to herself as the five of them made their way back over towards the fire. 'Don't ask, after running into Snape a few minutes ago..'

'Did he happen to look like he was seeking revenge?' questioned Sirius, cutting her off. Lily, thankful that he had, thought back to minutes previous and shook her head.

'Well that could be a good sign' stated Remus, putting his homework down on the table.

'Or it just means the prank didn't work Moony' wined Sirius.

'Prank!' interrupted Lily, looking at the three Marauder's skeptically, before shrugging, 'Ah, whatever, it's not like I really care anyway' the three of them gasped while Marlene reached across Remus to feel her forehead.

'Lily are you sick?' she questioned worriedly.

'I might be coming down with something,' she stated, letting out a quick chuckle, 'Funny story actually, a few minutes ago I go to drop off my bags in the Head's common room, and boy you wouldn't believe it, I think I'm seeing things.. You know, maybe I'll head up to the Hospital Wing, ask Madame Pomfrey to check me out'

'Lily..' started Marlene, putting a reassuring hand on her shoulder. 'I was going to owl you, but it would have just been horrid to find this out in a letter'

'Yes, definitely more horrid then walking in on it' she replied sarcastically. 'But it's not a big deal really, I'm happy for them truly, I just wish I had known earlier you see'

Remus and Sirius starred at her unblinking, 'Flower?' demanded Sirius, getting off the couch and walking over towards her, pulling her to her feet to take in the state of her dress, 'What in Merlin's pants happened to you?'

She shrugged in reply, falling back into the couch once more, 'Nothing new, went to my sister's wedding, she eventually threw me out and I came here in the cold and wet weather'

'She threw you out?' echoed Remus, the shock on his face, mirroring on both Marlene and Sirius'.

Lily rolled her eyes, 'Not literally of course, she just yelled at me and told me to leave. Who was I to stand in her way of getting what she wanted..' she stated, however this didn't seem to cure the shocked state of her friends, 'Alright, well, If you'll excuse me, I'm going up to my old dorm to change.. Seeing as that okay?' she added, turning towards Marlene, who just nodded in response.

Lily shot all four of them a smile before walking up the girl's staircase, head hanging ever so slightly. 'Well this certainly isn't her day' commented Marlene, after she was out of earshot. 'Just think of all the ruckus that had gone on at the wedding, and then to come back to Hogwarts to see..' Marlene pointed to James and Jessica, who seemed rather close together in the Head's common room, 'Well that'

She shuddered, quickly looking away from the Map, collapsing back into the couch, retaking her spot with her legs draped over Sirius. 'What are we going to do with her?' questioned Remus, picking his homework back off of the table.

'Whatever we do, we're definitely not sending her back to the Head's common room tonight' retorted Marlene, grabbing her book and opening it to the book marked page.

'She seems really bothered by this James thing..' started Sirius, however continued paying no attention to the furious glare Marlene was sending him, 'I would think it wouldn't faise her at all, seeing as he's just an _arrogant, bullying, toe-rag._'

'You know she hasn't called him that in over a year,' hissed Marlene, under her breath as she heard the door to their dormitory open upstairs.

Sirius nodded, and after a few moments of silence he spoke again, 'Well we can do one of two things.. Convince James to shag Jessica and be gone with her.. or get little Miss. Evan's a man of her own. You all know how jealous that bloke gets..'

'Or' interrupted Marlene sharply, 'We could just do nothing' she stated to which Remus agreed.

Sirius held up his hands in defence, 'Fine, have it your way. But when Lily comes crying to you..' he stopped abruptly as she appeared from the stairs, wearing sweats and a tank-top, her long red hair pulled up in a messy ponytail, forever leaving his sentence unfinished.

* * *

><p><strong>Reviews are nice :)<strong>


	12. Chapter 12

**_ Saturday, October 31st_**

James slumped down to breakfast, lazily walking down the countless flights of stairs until finally reaching the Great Hall which was already buzzing with excited students. He spotted the three other Marauder's seated in their usual spot and quickly made his way over towards them, rubbing his eyes and plopping down next to Peter.

'Blood hell' exclaimed Sirius, not bothering to swallow his food, 'You look awful mate?'

'I feel awful' he muttered, serving himself some of the delicious food that had been laid out in front of them. 'Jessica had me up all night' All three boys raised they eyebrows in response, causing James to sigh and frantically shack his head, 'No' he assured them, 'Not like that, I was up all night tutoring her in bloody muggle studies'

'She claimed that it was a stupid subject and stormed out of the library, only to come back minutes later, angrier than before and force me to continue helping her' he continued, moving the food on his plate around with his fork, 'Then when I suggested that we should get some sleep, she got even angrier, calling me every name in the book'

'Arrogant toe-rag?' Sirius questioned, a smirk playing at his lips.

James shook his head, 'Everyone except for that'

'Right' agreed Sirius, 'That's Lily's thing' he rolled his eyes in response before silence fell over the four of them, while they all ate their food.

'Prongs mate' asked Remus, 'Don't you have some sort of Head's Duty thing? I would assume, with the first Hogsmede trip in just a few hours, you and Lily would have to do something?'

'No, he doesn't' replied Lily, sitting down next to the four of them, Marlene and Mary doing the same. 'I was up early this morning and took care of it all'

'You didn't have to do that' interrupted James, passing her the same strawberry jam she put on her toast every morning.

'A thank you would do just fine' she continued, 'After all, you and Jessica were in the library longer than I was yesterday. Plus, to top it all off, it was a Friday night. So, I just did it, thinking you could deserve a break'

He smiled, 'Well then thanks'

'So when are we all meeting up?' demanded Sirius, 'I was thinking the three broom sticks at around 3?'

The others nodded in agreement, 'I don't know, I'll have to convince Jessica, or I might even have to bring her along'

Sirius, Remus and Peter all groaned in unison, 'Bloody hell mate,' started Sirius, 'I thought you only started going out with her for some stupid reason, if I had known you were going to actually be, dare I say it, committed, then I would've most certainly tried harder to talk you out of it'

'That's me as well' interrupted Lily, before the argument could get to heated between the two boys, 'I'm going to have to check with Amos, but I'm sure it won't be a problem since he promised to study with me yesterday then blew me off'

Marlene and Mary both rolled their eyes, 'I honestly don't understand why you're dating him' stated Marlene

'We're not dating' Lily corrected her, causing James to smile ever so slightly, however it was only missed by Lily herself, who was to busy glaring at Marlene to notice. 'Honestly we studied once together, scratch that, we had plans to study once together. He's taking me to Hogsmede, it's really not a big deal'

'He's a prick, Lily' cut in Mary, 'What's it going to take for you to see that?'

Frustrated, she stood from the table, 'Well it's better than going alone.' she whispered, picking up her things and walking from the Great Hall. All six of them watched her go, both Marlene and Mary sighing as she turned the corner.

'What's gotten into her lately?' asked James, setting down his fork and looking over towards the two girls, 'She's been acting all strange ever since she got back from that wedding of hers.. Does anyone know how that went?'

'Didn't ever talk to me about it' shrugged Marlene, 'I didn't even know she had gotten back the night before until I saw her at breakfast the next morning'

'What do you mean you didn't know?' demanded James, gazing at her confused, 'She stopped by the Head's common room to drop off her things, then she hightailed it out of there. She asked if I knew where you were, so I just assumed she went and found you' Suddenly he groaned, spotting Jessica quickly making her way over towards him, 'I have to go' he mumbled, pushing back his plate and getting to his feet.

Once he was out of ear shot, Sirius and Remus both turned on Marlene, 'Why in the world did you just lie to him?' asked Sirius,

'She definitely found you' added Remus, 'She found all of us'

'Honestly' mumbled Mary, sharing a look with Marlene, 'You two just aren't observant at all. We even talked about it in the common room that night'

'There was a lot going on that weekend' answered Sirius, winking at Marlene, 'It's not my fault I forgot the conversation that night, so if you would mind just refreshing out minds'

'Speak for yourself,' Remus cut in, 'I know exactly what their talking about'

'And we're not going to refresh your mind, Black' added Marlene, getting up from the table, Mary following her actions. 'You're on your own for this one' He groaned in frustration, mumbling to himself angrily and crossing his arms over his chest. However both Marlene and Mary simply laughed as they walked away.

'Oi!' hollered Remus at their backs, 'We'll meet you two down here around noon alright?'

'Sure thing' Mary replied, before turning her back once more and walking with Marlene from the hall.

* * *

><p>'We're never going to be able to find a table in here!' shouted Sirius to the three others, over the noise of the three broom sticks. 'We should just wait outside for everyone, go somewhere else maybe'<p>

Both Remus and Marlene nodded, following Sirius towards the door however the fact that Mary hadn't moved caused them all to stop to turn and face her. Noticing their questioning glances she spoke, 'Let's not go yet, I have this feeling'

'Alright' agreed Remus, moving up beside her and grabbing her hand leading her through the crowd, 'Anywhere in particular?' She smiled up at him, nodding towards the usual corner which they sat in.

Sirius huffed as he watched his mate lead his girl through the crowd of people, 'You know' he said turned to Marlene, snaking an arm around her waist, pulling her in towards him, 'We don't have to stay with them, we could go somewhere.. just us, I'm sure they wouldn't even notice' She kissed him lighting, taking his hand and leading him in the same direction that Remus and Mary had gone.

'Look at that' she said, nodding towards the corner to see Remus and Mary taking a seat down next to Lily. 'A free table'

'I wonder how long she's been there' stated Sirius as they neared the table, 'Do you think that he-'

'No' interrupted Marlene, 'He wouldn't stand her up twice in one weekend' Sirius nodded as they neared the table, both of them taking the spots on either side of Lily. 'Are you alright?' Marlene whispered, barely audible over the sound in the three broom sticks.

'Yeah' responded Lily, 'I've just been reading..'

'Must have been a sad book' she stated, observing Lily's slightly red eyes and small sad smile.

Ignoring her completely, Lily turned to the rest of the group, 'So,' she questioned loudly, 'What have you four been up to today?'

'We only all just met up a few minutes ago, when we ran into each other on our way here' said Remus, 'Otherwise, we have just been walking around the town, enjoying the freedom'

'Yeah' agreed Sirius, 'Us as well'

Within minutes, after they had convinced Sirius, much help from Marlene, to get up and get them all drinks. James, dragging Jessica behind him, walked into the three broom sticks, pushing their way over to the back table. Instantly after spotting them, Lily shrunk further in her seat, the only time she actually wished Amos to be there so he could see her, happy with another bloke, but he wasn't there.

_Maybe he won't notice, _she thought to herself, slightly hopeful. 'Hey there' he greeted them, pulling out a chair for Jessica, who smirked in triumph at Lily.

'Hey yourself' answered Marlene, searching the crowd for Sirius.

'Lily?' James continued, taking a seat himself, 'Where's Amos? You mentioned earlier-'

'He's not coming' she cut him off sharply. Sighing inwardly, _so much for not noticing. _

James nodded, taking Jessica's hand under the table, 'Maybe he's just a little late..?'

She groaned, attempting to flash Marlene some sort of signal for help, however she was too busy scanning the crowd. 'If he is,' she replied, 'He's over three hours late'

'Well you know Lily' started Jessica, 'He might have something more important to do, after all, Amos can't give up every minute of his time to spend with you'

Offended, Lily nodded, pretending to actually care and getting to her feet, grabbing her coat and bag off the chair she walked into the crowd. Mumbling something to the group about going to help Sirius, however they were all far to occupied to notice her bag and coat in hand. Her shoulders slumping and head hanging she walked away from the table.

'Flower!' exclaimed Sirius, after having her almost walk into him as she walked past the counter where multiple students were shouting their orders. 'Where are you headed, I'm just getting the drinks now'

'I've actually got somewhere.. an essay.. homework' she started, putting her hand in her pocket digging for change, 'Homework, I just remembered that I haven't finished my essay for Slughorn due Monday'

He nodded, pretending to believe her lie 'You can't stay? For Butter Beer, I have yours here'

She shook her head, handing him exact change for the drink, 'Its getting a little crowded back there actually, so here, drink mine or give it to someone else. It doesn't matter really..'

'He asks about you' Sirius whispered, just loud enough for her to hear, causing her to stop in her tracks, 'Always asking about you and never getting a straight answer out of any of us'

'So?' demanded Lily, 'What's that got to do with anything?'

Sirius sighed, 'I'm just saying, that if you have a problem with her, much like the rest of us do, you're probably going to be the only one he's going to listen to. Trust me, I've tried to convince him. Moony has even tried. But even both our opinions combined doesn't measure up to yours'

'But you're the Marauder's, you value each others opinions more than anything'

He shook his head, trying to find the right words to say, without giving too much away. However suddenly he heard the door chime open and instantly his heart sank. 'Lily!' shouted the voice, pushing it's way through the crowd. 'Oh there you are!' Amos exclaimed, finally spotting her, ignoring Sirius completely. 'I've literally been looking for you everywhere'

She raised her eyebrows in response, 'Well where have you been looking?'

'Everywhere, all over the school, I've gone into countless shops. No ones seen you all day, where have you been?'

'She's been here' interrupted Sirius.

Amos rolled his eyes, 'I'm sorry _Black_, did I ask you?' he hissed, throwing an arm around Lily's shoulder and slumping forward slightly, putting most of his weight on her. 'I remember asking my girlfriend, so if you will excuse us'

'Don't you talk to him like that!' defended Lily, stepping out from under his arm and standing in between the two boys, slightly closer to Sirius. 'He didn't do anything to you' However suddenly she froze, realization of what he had just called her finally hitting her. 'Girlfriend?' she whispered. Sirius grabbed her hand as if to keep her from making a terrible decision and made an attempt as to pull her closer towards him. Although Amos would have none of that and grabbed her by the waist, pulling her into him.

'Yeah girlfriend' he said, 'I really like you Lily, I truly-'

'I'm going to stop you right there,' she interrupted, putting and hand on his chest and separating their two bodies, 'You stood me up yesterday and then again today. Both times in which I've waited over two hours for you to show up, if this is how you treat your girlfriends, then you have my blessing to find yourself another girl. There's no way I'm going to put up with you being my boyfriend if you're going to act like this'

Sirius smirked as Amos spun on his heal and headed for the door. 'Lily that was brilliant!' he exclaimed, 'I have never been so proud! If only James had seen that!'

'Stop' Lily whispered, 'Don't tell him'

'What do you mean?'

She sighed, 'He's happy Sirius. Doesn't that mean anything to you?'

'Of course-'

'He's happy with _her_ and I'm not going to get in the way of that. I'm not going to talk to him and convince him to break up with her, if James is happy, I'm happy'

'That's rubbish.. you're lying' Sirius whispered as she turned her back on him, headed for the door. 'You're not happy and you won't be as long as James is with any girl other than you' She kept walking, her pace quickening, pretending to not have heard Sirius.

* * *

><p>Lily groaned, angrily slamming <em>An advanced guide to Tranfiguration <em>and tossing it to the end of the couch, by her feet. She closed her eyes and brought her hands to her temples, making small circular rubbing motions. Forcing herself to take deep breaths, she finally felt her frustration slowly start to melt away and her thoughts began to drift from the task at hand to earlier that day.

It had only been around three hours since she had heard Sirius whisper the ugly truth. She just couldn't seem to shake the feeling that she would never truly be happy watching James be with another girl. Sure, she would put on her best smile when they were around and fake it as best she could, but never would she be happy about it. They were manly all she thought about, and how Sirius knew this she doesn't know. However whenever Lily sees James with Jessica, she's jealous and angry. Angry because after all these years he has chased after her, then finally when she's ready to admit to the world that she's fallen for James Potter, he moves on.

Suddenly, a gust of wind flew in from the open window, sending shivers down her spine. Sighing, she picked her wand off of the coffee table and following the exact instruction from her textbook, she attempted to conjure a blanket for herself. Although, Lily frowned when it failed to work and frustrated once more she snatched the book from the end of the couch and frantically searched the book to find out where she went wrong.

_Wand should be held at around arms length, comfortable grip (not too loose, not too tight) and directly pointed in the space in which the witch or wizard wishes the object to appear. _

Lily nodded along with the text, following the instructions, step by step.

_Flicking the wand in a circular, down wards motion, think strongly in what you want to conjure and articulate the word, Appareo (APP-R-O)_. _A Latin word meaning to become visible, or to appear._

Taking a deep breath, she thought hard of a nice warm blanket and moved her wand in the proper motion. Slightly more positive she opened her eyes to find, once again, just an empty couch. Enraged by her lake of ability, she picked up her text book and hurtled it towards the portrait hole.

'Oi!' said the familiar voice of James Potter, striding into the light of the Head's common room, 'Watch where you're throwing things'

'Sorry' she replied, sitting up a little straighter and extending her hand as he returned her textbook, 'I didn't hear you come in'

'Would you have not thrown the book if you had known?' he asked

Lily shook her head, 'No, I just would have thrown it at the opposite wall'

He chuckled in response, seating himself on the couch next to her. 'Why, may I ask' he said after silence fell over the pair of them, 'Did you throw your transfiguration book?'

'Because I've been trying to conjure a blanket for the last twenty minutes, however no matter what I do, it always fails' she replied, angrily.

He smirked, pulling her wand from his back pocket, 'It's not all that hard, actually' James started, twirling his wand in his hands. 'Here' he added, flicking it in one fluent motion causing a warm, wool blanket to appear draped over her legs.

She rolled her eyes in response, 'Well you don't have to go and show off Potter' she shot back, vanishing the blanket in the blink of an eye.

'Well you don't have any trouble vanishing objects' he pointed out, 'But if you would like, I can show you a little trick that I picked up on to conjure objects' Lily smiled slightly in response, 'Not tonight though, it's the feast.. which I really should be getting to'

Before she could answer, the portrait hole swung open and in strode Jessica. 'James' she wined, 'You were supposed to meet me five minutes ago, what in the world have you been doing?'

'Sorry Jess' he murmured, getting to his feet. 'We just got talking, I'm sorry'

She shrugged, taking his hand, 'I guess it's alright' she replied, putting on a face, 'Are you ready to go then?'

'Yes,' James said, dropping her hand, 'Just let me run and grab something, It'll only be a second' she nodded and James tore up the staircase towards his bedroom.

Silence fell over the two girls, and sighing, Lily picked up her transfiguration book once more to read the instruction one last time before heading down to the Halloween feast. 'You stay away from him, alright?' demanded Jessica, who had moved closer towards Lily.

'What?' she replied, looking up from the book.

'Stay away from James' Jessica repeated, slower as if to further Lily's understanding. 'I see the way you look at him, and you're jealous. He chased after you for years, and you know what. You've lost your chance now, he's moved on'

'I don't know what you think you know, but if you're accusing me of having any feelings for James other than friendship. Well, you are wrong. We're just friends, and always will be.. nothing else' however hearing herself say it, Lily wasn't convinced. Jessica nodded though, and appeared to believe her. Giving Lily the chance to politely turn back to her book, just as James came bounding down the stairs, holding the folded Marauder's Map.

'What's that?' demanded Jessica, gesturing to the old parchment in his hands.

James glanced down at the parchment and held it up to make it seem like it was worthless, 'Just some old parchment I borrowed from Sirius a while ago'

'What's on it?' she asked, reaching out for it.

However James moved it away from her hands, 'Just some Quidditch strategies,' he lied, 'Sirius and I thought them up a long time ago while in detention, and he's been bugging me for the ideas because he wants to try them out to see if they're any good'

Jessica nodded, instantly becoming uninterested and grabbing James' hand. 'We're going down to the feast,' he announced, 'Do you want to walk down with us Lily?'

She shook her head, 'You go on ahead, I'm just going to read this one last bit'

'We don't mind waiting, it's not a problem'

Lily smiled slightly, 'Just go on, you must be extremely hungry'

'Alright' he replied, letting Jessica pull him towards the portrait hole, 'See you down there' he called as they left the room.

Lily closed the text book and got to her feet, waiting exactly two minutes before leaving the common room and making her own way down to the feast. With only her shadow in the light of the full moon to accompany her.

XxX

'I bloody hate that bloke' muttered James, under his breath, 'And you're sure he stood her up?'

Sirius and Remus both nodded, 'You should have seen her when we got there, she just looked so..' started Sirius,

'Broken' Remus finished for him, to which he nodded in approval.

James shook his head, 'There's got to be some way we can prevent her from going out with that bloke any longer' he began, looking at his two mates for ideas.

'We could always get her to catch him with another bird' answered Sirius, 'She would stay away from Diggory forever that way' he continued. 'No more competition for you'

James rolled his eyes and continued, 'Honestly mate, it's not a game, not a competition, not anything. She's moved on and.. ' there was a slight catch in his throat, which he quickly covered as a cough, 'so have I' Sirius and Remus both raised their eyebrows.

'Besides,' added Remus, 'We can't do that to her, if Lily found out you were interfering again. Well let's just say, you definitely wouldn't be able to convince her that you really have changed from fifth year. A regular person can only take other people meaddling for so long.'

Sirius and James nodded in reply, 'Although Moony' agreed Sirius, 'You're forgetting one very important detail'

'And what's that?' he questioned.

James smirked, 'Evan's isn't just any, regular girl'

* * *

><p><strong>Reviews are great! I love Reviews.<br>**


	13. Chapter 13

_**Sunday, November 8th**_

'No Sirius' Remus repeated, for what seemed like the ten time as he rubbed his temples, becoming more and more frustrated with his mate, 'It's impossible. There is absolutely no way that the four of us are going to be able to fit under the invisibility cloak just to sneak into the Slytherin common room to steal the underwear of a bird that told the rest of her house that you were rubbish to snog'

'Oh come on Moony' Sirius wined, putting on his best puppy dog face, which was surprisingly very good, considering the facts. 'Where's the Marauder in you, where's the need for adventure, your want for mischief?'

Remus looked up at Sirius making eye contact, and for a moment it had seemed that he was going to give in. 'No' he restated, causing the quietly working James sitting beside the pair of them to smile into his transfiguration essay. 'It's not happening'

'Alright fine' he pouted, 'Prongs and I will just have to go without you then'

James looked up from his essay, the first time since the three have them had taken a seat down at the small square table in the back of the Head's Common room, making direct contact with Sirius before responding. 'No' he echoed Remus. 'Definitely not happening'

Frustrated, Sirius crossing his arms over his chest, slumping back into his chair. 'Besides,' James continued, after closing his transfiguration text book and pushing the finished essay off to the side, 'It's not like it really matter's to you what the Slytherin house thinks of you'

Sirius scoffed in reply, 'Oh?' he countered, 'And why's that?'

Both Remus and James shared a look before turning back to face Sirius, both baring the same mischievous smirk. Neither making any sort of movement to respond, instead watching in amusement as their mate suffered under their accusing looks. 'Oh come off it' Sirius hollered, 'Have you two gone mad or something?'

James nodded, 'Yeah, but the worlds mad.'

'Alright then' continued Sirius, leaning forward in his chair, hitting the table with every word, 'Then. Stop. Smirking.'

Remus rolled his eyes, leaning forward as well, making it seem, to an innocent passer-by that the three Marauder's were planning one of their very famous pranks. 'Come on Pads' he whispered, 'Even Pete's noticed'

'Oh yeah?' he demanded, 'And what is it that _everyone's _noticed?'

'I just don't understand why you didn't tell us' started James, 'I mean, we're your best mates, your fellow Marauder's, I find it ridiculous that you would think that we wouldn't figure it out for ourselves anyway'

'Please' muttered Sirius, 'Enlighten me on what it is you think you know'

'Don't talk rubbish' retorted Remus, 'We know you fancy the pants off a certain someone'

'And who?' said Sirius, 'Do you think that is?'

'McKinnon' James stated, as if it was extremely obvious. 'You're completely taken with her'

Sirius stared at his two mates, remaining expressionless as they both gazed at him expectantly, 'Well you would just know all about that now wouldn't you Prongs' he hissed, 'Head over heals for a bird that hasn't even looked your way, so you choose to snog some other bird to get her attention but she still remains happy as ever with Diggory'

'Padfoot' James warned, 'Stop it'

'No you stop it, you don't like Jessica. You hate her as much as the next bloke, but there's someone that hates her more, which somehow makes it worth it for you.'

'I don't like Lily' James hollered in retorted, causing Sirius to smirk.

'I never said you did mate,' he added, with a shrug, leaning back in his chair, 'I only said that you didn't like Jessica'

'But you mentioned Diggory, you were definitely implying her' James retorted, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

'A ton of birds have dated that bloke' admitted Sirius, 'Although I can't really see why, he's a prick'

Both James and Remus nodded in agreement, 'So' started Remus, somehow making an effort to steer the conversation in a different direction, 'Speaking of Lily, where is she tonight? I would have thought she'd be working on her transfiguration essay that's due tomorrow'

'You know her well enough to know that she finished it weeks ago' replied James, 'Beside, I don't know where she is, I don't have to know where she is at every moment of the day.'

'A simply no would have been just fine Prongs' he answered, turning to face him, smirking slightly, 'Besides isn't that what we invented the Map for? So you could know the exact location of Lily at every time of day?'

'Yeah Prongs' added Sirius, 'Aren't you just dying to pull it out of your back pocket, say though wonderful magic words and figure out if she's off in a broom cupboard snogging Diggory senseless or not?'

James shook his head in response, and to push him even further Sirius held out his hand, 'While give it here then, I'm interested to know and I'm sure Moony is as well'

After a few moments were neither boy moved, James finally shifted in his seat, reluctantly handing over the Marauder's Map. Sirius beamed, snatching in from his hands and beckoning Remus to say the magic words, as he so put it.

'So what are we going to do with the map once we leave?' questioned James, making a move to distract his best mates.

'What do you mean?' Sirius questioned, scanning the Map for the footprints entitled Lily Evan's.

'Well we're not going to have much use for it' admitted James, 'I doubt we'll even return to Hogwarts. Why would we need a Map of it?'

'So you're suggesting we leave it here?' said Remus, leaning over the table to help Sirius scan various parts of the Map.

James nodded, 'We could always hide it, or give it to one of the house elves in the kitchens to give to future Marauder's'

However the conversation was quickly dropped when Sirius' hand stopped moving over the Map and stopped on a particular spot, tapping it twice to show Remus, and upon seeing what he was pointing at he immediately looked up from the parchment and shared a look with Sirius. 'What is it?' demanded James.

Sirius raised his eyebrows in response, 'I though you didn't want to know' he echoed.

'I lied alright,' he muttered under his breath, however loud enough for a wide grin to spread across Sirius' face before he, some what hesitantly, placed the map on the table, pointing to the two footprints labelled Lily Evan's. James took one look at the Map and was up on his feet, storming from the room, Sirius and Remus both running out after him. 'Prongs' Sirius shouted, as he and Remus tried to keep up with him, 'Calm down, just hold on for a second'

'You've heard the rumours, you know how he acts when she's not around' he hissed in retorted, stopping in his tracks and whirling around to face him, causing Sirius to almost walk right into him. 'If he hurts her, I will never forgive myself'

'I get it Prongs,' Sirius continued, as James once again began to walk. 'But, like she's told you before, she doesn't like you always looking out for her.'

'She doesn't know what she's talking about,' he argued, 'I've always been there, protecting her, helping her'

'Exactly, you've always been there' Remus emphasized. 'Maybe it's time to let her just figure this one out on her own'

However, no matter what the two boys said, or tried to say, James continued down the corridor, taking sharp corners, threatening to break into a run. Quickly making his way towards the broom closet on the forth floor. Tearing around one last corner before spotting the closet, he flautered slightly, stopping in his tracks. Although shaking his head he quickly closed the distance between him and the door and he reached out, expecting it to be locked, and to his surprised was able to turn the knob and wrench the door open. Revealing both Amos and Lily, seated in the middle of the floor, his arms wrapped around her.

Without question, he reached into the broom closet, grabbing Diggory by the collar and pulling him with much force off of Lily and into the corridor, sending him flying into the wall opposite them. 'Potter' started Lily, coming out more scared then she had expected. 'What in the world?'

Sirius and Remus rounded the corner and approached the group just in time to witness James draw his wand, pointing it threateningly at Amos. 'Give me one reason not to' James hissed under his breath.

They observed while both Lily and Amos stood in complete shock, and while James scanned his brain for the right hex to use. Sirius made to move towards James, slowly drawing his wand ready to intervene. Although Remus, not paying attention to James, had his eyes fixed on Lily. And watched as a small, sliver, tear drop slowly slide down her cheek, eventually slipping right off and falling to the ground, smashing into a million pieces as it hit the stone.

'James' he heard Lily say, her small whisper, echoing off the walls of the corridor, 'Don't do this, we were just taking'

Quicker now, Sirius pulled his wand right out into the open disarming his best mate before he could do anything that he would regret. 'Prongs mate' he said, gripping both their wands in his hands, 'Come on, let's go'

There was no movement from any of the boys. Eventually, James nodded, lowering his head and turning his back on both Diggory and Lily, however, instantly Sirius saw a mischievious glint in his eye. Before he could protest, James had quickly turned around and delivered a swift punch to Diggory's jaw, knocking him off balance, causing him to fall backwards onto the ground.

'You prick!' Lily shouted, making her way over towards James as he glared down at Amos on the ground. She put herself between them, forcefully shoving James back down the hall towards where Sirius and Remus stood. 'He didn't do anything to you! We were just talking you daft idiot!'

Sirius watched as James face suddenly fell. He placed a hand on his shoulder, watching as his mate didn't dare look Lily in the eyes, and guided him back down the hall, Remus lingering a few seconds longer before following them. As they turned the corner, they could hear as Lily quickly fussed over Amos, obviously helping him to his feet and after he bluntly refused to go to the Hospital Wing, she had drawn her wand and mended his jaw herself, his hissing in pain echoing all the way down the hall.

* * *

><p>Later that evening, after Lily had finally convinced Amos to get checked out by Madame Pomfrey, she made her way down the many staircases and stormed right out of the castle, everyone in her path instantly clearing the way, her temper was famous around the school from the multiple fights between her and James over the last few years. It was true that this year had been one of her better years for keeping her anger in check, however the moment the students saw her as she marched across the grounds towards the Quidditch pitch, red hair flowing madly behind her, they knew that the monster had been unleashed.<p>

She, however, paid no attention to the students quickly walking in the opposite direction and continued, furiously down the hill. Upon arriving at the stadium, she tore open it's door, storming right onto the pitch. Up above her the Gryffindor Quidditch team, was practising multiple manoeuvres however once she spotted the two boys she was looking for, she did not hesitate to yell.

'Potter!' she cried, 'Black!' Instantly the players above her stopped moving, and slowly, one by one they all turned to face her.

'Oh have fun with that' muttered Jackson Bones, the third chaser on the team next to James and Remus, being quiet familiar with all the fights involving James and Lily because they always seemed to effect his playing skills.

'Prongs mate' started Remus, flying up beside them, 'What in the world did you do this time?'

'She's never interrupted practice before' added their seeker, Abby Vance.

'I actually have no bloody idea what I did' he admitted, staring down at Lily below them. Her arms crossed and brow furrowed, he shook his head and sighed, turning to Marlene. 'Can't you do anything?' he questioned 'Calm her down, convince her to hold off, at least until practice is over'

She however shook her head, 'You see how furious she looks,' Marlene said, 'Like hell I'm going down there,'

James glared at her in response, sighing once more. 'Laps' he told his team, before starting a descent. He could hear Sirius beside him, making a move to continue with the rest of the team, however with one fierce stare from his best mate he followed him down towards Lily.

'Flower' started Sirius, dismounting his broom, 'You know we're kind of in the middle of practice'

'How dare you!' she hissed, 'You bloody pricks, attack my boyfriend..'

James snorted, cutting her off, 'Boyfriend' he echoed, 'You mean you're still dating that git?'

'It's not like you gave me a good reason not to,' she hissed in retort, both boys made to respond however she cut them both off, 'But I didn't come here to quarrel like an old married couple'

Both boys raised their eyebrows, 'So what did you come here for Evan's?' responded James sharply.

'An apology' she told them, uncrossing her arms and putting her hands on her hips.

I took all they could for Sirius and James not to laugh, both sharing multiple looks and smiling uncontrollably. However, Lily, sensing this, crossed her arms once move over her chest, only becoming angrier by the second. As bursts of laughter slowly started to escape their mouths, she rolled her eyes and made to leave the pitch.

'Evan's' she heard James say as she made her way towards the castle. 'Out of curiosity, what is it that we have to apologize about?'

'Stop interfering in my life Potter' she warned, hissing under her breath, 'For years I've dealt with your constant jealousy! Hexing my boyfriends since fifth year, scaring them away from me. Then a boy finally comes along and actually fancies me, who doesn't think I'm just another girl he can shag in a broom closet, and there you are, ruining everything once again. So, this is my final warning' she continued, stomping her feet towards him and jabbing him sharply in the chest with every word. 'Stay. Out. Of. My. Life'

He scoffed in reply, as Sirius slowly backed away from the pair of them, unnoticed. 'You think he fancies you!' repeated James, raising his eyebrows in what could only be thought of as a arrogant manor. 'Honestly Evan's, for the brightest white of our age you can sure be real daft. He doesn't fancy you, don't you get it? For years I've beaten Amos at everything, better in every class, Head Boy, Quidditch star. He's getting back at me with you'

Anger boiling inside of her, she felt her hand edging towards her wand uncontrollably. 'Oh here we go again. He's just going to hurt you. He's using you to get to me. He doesn't really fancy you. He's lying to you..' she mimicked him, rolling her eyes and waving her hands about as she did so, 'Don't you get it Potter. I don't care what you think. I've never cared for your opinion, although you always seem to bore me with it anyway'

'Well I'm sorry for caring' James shouted, watching out of the corner of his eye as Sirius remounted his broom and joined the others hovering above them. 'I won't _bore_ you with my worries anymore! I don't know why I even keep doing it, it's not like you're grateful!'

'Oh look,' Lily approved, 'He's finally getting it'

He whirled around, snatching his broom from the ground and proceeding to mount it. Hovering ever so slightly in the air he turned to face her. 'Now get off my pitch' he ordered, 'I'm in the middle of a practice'

'You're pitch?' she repeated, 'Last time I checked-'

'Oh shut it will you!' James hollered as he rose higher and higher.

Offended that he cut her off, she angrily made her way back towards the castle, 'You're such an arrogan-'

'Yes, yes' he agreed, waving her insult off as if it was nothing, as if she was nothing. 'An arrogant toe rag, I know!'

He payed no attention to her as she left the pitch, instead turning his full attention back to the rest of his team, who all eyed him worriedly. 'Prongs,' started Sirius, flying over towards him, however James cut him off.

'I don't remember telling you to stop doing laps,' he commanded, raising his eyebrows as the others sighed and continued circling the pitch. James fallen behind and watching them pull ahead, stopping to hover in mid-air. _The worst part about that fight_, he thought to himself, _Was that Sirius was right. Of all people, it honestly had to be him. _He sighed, picking up speed on his broom, sharing a look with his best mate as he flew past him, _he's never going to let me live this down. _

* * *

><p><strong>I like Reviews :)<strong>


	14. Chapter 14

_**Monday, November 9th**_

James checked glanced down the hall out of the corner of his eye, before glancing at his watch. He was standing by the Defense Against the Dark Arts class room, barely listening as Jessica continued to babble on enthusiastically. He mirrored her smile, and was just about to tell her he really had to get to class when he heard her. Smiling to himself, he listened as Lily and Marlene drew nearer.

'He made us do sixty extra laps because of you' he hear Marlene say in an irritated whisper. 'Sixty!' she exclaimed, a little louder than she thought, 'We were out on the pitch until curfew! I thought I was going to fall right off my broom by the end of practice'

Lily could only have rolled her eyes in response, he reasoned with himself as he failed to here a response from her. 'He's scheduled the pitch five times this week, not including the game we have on Saturday!' Marlene continued, 'I swear, if he has us doing a crazy amount of laps every practice, I'm going to personally hurt you'

'Oh come on' replied Lily, causing James to smirk, 'You're completely overreacting'

'Oh really?' smirked Marlene, rubbing her lower back, 'After you do sixty laps on top of the twenty we already have to do every practice, come and talk to me. Then tell me that I am still overreacting.'

James remembered as Lily had stormed off the pitch the previous night. He held back a laugh of triumph. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched as the two girls strode right passed him, not even looking his way. He quickly laughed obnoxiously to catch their attention and stared down at Jessica affectionately. 'So as I was saying' he heard Jessica tell him, 'A long story short, Sirius Black is up to his old habits again, poor Melody, actually thinking she meant something to him'

Even though he had not seen it happen, he could only image how Marlene's face dropped. If they hadn't noticed him and Jessica standing there earlier, they sure knew now.

'What did she just say?' James heard Marlene whisper from down the hall. He flashed Jessica a worried glance and attempted to cover up what she had just said with another burst of laughter.

'I'm sure you heard her wrong' Lily assured her, 'Besides who could hear anything with Potter over there laughing so obnoxiously, I'm almost having to yell just to have a conversation with you'

He instantly looked in their direction, pushing himself off the wall and taking a few steps towards her, Jessica rooted in the same spot she had been for ten minutes. 'What was that Evan's?' he demanded. 'Do I sense a hint of jealously that I'm not laughing at something you said?'

She whirled around to glare at him, taking a swift step towards him, jabbing him in the chest with her finger. 'No you certainly did not' she replied harshly, 'I honestly pity the girl who's dumb enough to go on a date with you, and worse, actually agree to being classified as your girlfriend'

'Oh really?' he asked, smirking slightly, 'Because it seems only a few months ago you were begging me to go out with you'

'Has Black hit you over the head too many times?' Lily retorted, 'That is certainly not what happened, besides, a lot can change in just a few months. For instance, you changing from alright to completely unbearable to be around'

Marlene had retreated into the classroom, unable to listen to another argument between the two of them. No matter the out come she was going to suffer, either from a very tough practice from James, or irritable Lily. However upon entering the room, she heard the same piece of information, causing her legs to suddenly freeze up.

'Did you hear? That sixth year Ravenclaw, Melody Thinble, was with Sirius Black last night' said a girl to the right of her, who was quickly shushed by her friend.

Marlene turned to face them, unable to take it anymore. 'Did you say this Melody was with-' She felt her voice catch in her throat, finding herself not able to finish the sentence.

'I'm sure it's just a rumor,' the girl told her, 'Just something someones made up'

She nodded, turning on the spot and walking over towards her seat. If she listened closely she could still the girl's words ringing in her ears. However no matter how much she willed it to be untrue, no matter how much she tried to convince herself that it was just a rumor. A part of her knew it was true, after all, she didn't see Sirius after practice last night.

XxX

Remus ran around the corner, Sirius hot on his tracks. 'Oh stop running' repeated Sirius for what seemed like the tenth time, 'We're not going to be late,'

'I can't risk it' Remus replied, picking up the pace darting around another corner and down the hall towards the defense room. Quickly coming to a halt upon spotting James and Lily in a very heated argument. Rolling his eyes he turned to Sirius, who had just managed to catch up with him, 'Should we even bother to stop them?' he questioned. However at that exact moment he saw Lily quickly draw her wand, as James' hand flinched towards his own. Both Remus and Sirius groaned, before taking off down the hall towards the pair.

'Now, now' started Sirius, as he sauntered up beside James, 'Is this really the way our two Head's should be behaving?'

'Oh shut it Black' hissed Lily's, not taking her eyes off James.

He raised his eyebrows, nudging Remus in the side, 'Did you hear that?' he asked him, 'Black she called me. She only does that when she's furious' Remus nodded in agreement, reaching into his own pocket for his wand. 'Honestly Prongs,' continued Sirius, turning to James, 'What did you do this time?'

'Me?' he hissed in retort, 'You mean her'

Lily raised her eyebrows, flicking her wand threatening in James' direction as he continued, 'Her existence just irritates me, Pads'

'My existence?' hollered Lily, causing the Sirius and Remus to jump backwards slightly, however James remained rooted in his place. 'You are so thick. I was getting along just fine until you decided to fall into my life, you pestered me to go out with you for years on end, scared multiple boys away from me, and, single handedly ruined the friendship between my former best friend and I. So I find it extremely hard to believe that my existence irritates you because from day one I have been tell you one thing, and one thing only. To bloody stay out of my life'

Sirius and Remus turned to James, both wearing extremely shocked expressions, expecting James to mirror theirs. However upon setting eyes on him, they noticed, that he appeared to be smiling. 'It's funny you see. Ever since I, as you said, ruined your friendship with Snape, you haven't been able to keep your eyes off me'

Reacting instinctively Remus quickly drew his wand and cast the strongest shield charm he could imagine just as Lily had fired off her most powerful jinx. Lily's spell had smashed through Remus' shield charm and hit James, resembling a baseball that had passed through a window, cracking it only to watch it shatter to pieces moments later. James staggered backwards, somehow losing his balance and falling to the ground. Both Remus and Sirius, suddenly fearful for their own lives, took multiple steps back from where she was standing.

'Let me make myself perfectly clear Potter. I have not, will not, nor ever will fancy you' she stated, staring down at him, emphasizing every 'not', before retreating into the classroom.

Sirius whistled once he was sure she was out of ear shot. 'For the sake of Merlin, Prongs' he said turning to give his best mate a hand, 'Did her spell actually just go right through Moony's shield charm'

James shrugged, 'That's only because Moony wasn't fully focusing,' he assured them, looking around before and wondering to himself when Jessica had decided to leave. He flashed them a smile before walking into the classroom.

'The funny thing is' said Remus 'That was probably one of the strongest shield charms I've ever done'

'That can only mean one thing' responded Sirius, 'You either need to practice your spells,' to which Remus glared at him, 'Or that if she wanted to, Lily could kick some ass'

XxX

Lily sat in the armchair by the fire in the Head's common room, reading her favourite Jane Austin novel in attempts to keep her mind of the arrogant-toe rag she shared the room with. Just as her eyelids began to droop, and the fire was only ashes, the portrait hole opened. The person walked into the room and over towards her, casting a shadow on her.

'If you know what's good for you, you'll turn around and walk right out of here' she hissed, not even bothering to open her eyes, suspecting it could only be James standing in front of her.

He cleared his throat, 'I was just on patrol' he stated, 'And I thought I would come by, no one's seen you since defense'

Peeking through one eye, she saw Remus standing before her. With a sigh she swung around in the armchair so she was facing him. She looked up at him, an exhausted expression on her face. He flashed her a small smile and extended his hand, offering it to her. 'Come on Lily,' he said as she took his hand, 'Lets go walking'

XxX

'You're lying' exclaimed Remus, a few minutes later, as he and Lily continued to patrol the halls of the school. 'She didn't say that to you!'

She shook her head in response, 'I'm not lying, Jessica accused me of being extremely jealous of her and James. That I've lost my chance and he's moved on,'

'And this' continued Remus, 'Probably just made you hate her even more' Lily nodded in agreement, 'For one she's dating James, and secondly, she right' he whispered under his breath, regretting the words the moment he said them.

She rounded on him, 'I do not- Am not jealous of her!' she retorted, while he continued to walk down the corridor, shrugging at her attempts to convince him otherwise.

'You have to understand Remus,' Lily continued, 'She's just a horrible person, she's not right for him.'

Remus sighed, peering into a classroom, 'You know, if you said that to him, anger aside, he would probably end it with her'

'But that's not the point, because if I tell him that, then he and Jessica would be right. Besides, it's all about him being happy. If he fails to see the, dreadful, extremely horrific person that she is, well then what would that make me if I showed him all these things?'

He smiled in response, 'You know you're much easier to deal with than a jealous James, you'll at least listen to reason and put up a well constructed argument. He'd just yell and probably storm out onto the Quidditch pitch'

Lily playfully punched him in the shoulder, as silence fell over them. The only sound coming from the sound of their shoes against the cold stone floor. 'So,' said Remus, letting the word hang in the air for a moment, 'How is Mary doing?'

'I suspect she's good' replied Lily, sending him a questioning glance, 'Why?'

He shrugged in return, 'Am I not allowed to ask how she is?'

'You know what I meant Remus, don't play dumb with me' she said, 'You're way too smart for that'

He let out a small chuckle, before rubbing the back of his head messing his hair up a little, reminding her of James. She shook her head at his antics, 'She won't speak to me'

Lily gasped 'Did she? Did you tell her?'

'First off, who told you?' he demanded, 'Was it James? And I know he's a good person, and he would never do it on purpose, but sometimes, when he gets around you.. I mean.. He just lets things slip, by complete accident of course'

'I figured it out for myself, thank you very much.' she replied slightly offended by the fact that he thought someone had have to have told her. 'Back in forth year, I mean, it wasn't all that hard, considering you had to miss our patrols once every month, assuring me that time and time again you needed to return home because your mother was sick.'

Remus chuckled at his past self, 'I was never good at lying to you, or lying to anyone for that matter' he said, 'But you're okay right? You're not going to run away screaming or anything?'

She started to laugh at that insane idea, when it dawned on her and she quickly sobered, 'Oh Remus,' she replied, pulling him into a hug, 'I won't tell a soul, and I'm certainly not going to go running off. You heard what I said a few weeks ago when we were in defense, you're one of the most bravest, kindest friends that I have. One just doesn't go throwing away a friend like that'

He sighed, 'If only everyone thought the same way you did Lily,' he stated, 'My life would be so much easier'

'Please tell me that Mary didn't?' demanded Lily, stopping in front of him, forcing him to look her in the eyes.

Remus shook his head, 'She doesn't know.' replied Remus, side stepping her to look into another classroom. 'I keep hinting it to her, hoping that she'd just figure it out. The worst part is, I think she does know, and she's just pretending she doesn't because she's scared that she'll be right.'

'Mary's not that kind of person-'

'I didn't think any of my friends were, but once they found out they ran. They were so scared, that they ran from me, me and my family. We had to move Lily, our neighbours hated us that much!'

'She wouldn't do that-'

'I love her Lily,' stated Remus, forcefully cutting her off. His voice echoing down the empty corridor. 'If I told her and she did what everyone else did and ran. Well I don't think I could bare the pain, and that's saying something'

'What you have to understand Remus,' started Lily, trying to meet his eyes, 'Is that just because you turn into a werewolf once every month, doesn't make you a bad person, what you need to know is that if someone close to you doesn't see this, if the person you're thinking about spending the rest of your life with, doesn't understand that they're not worth it' she held his hand in hers, 'It'll be hard, neither you nor I can predict how she'll react. But I will be here, whether she's with you or not, forever standing by your side.'

She took a deep breath, and waited a few moments before speaking once more, 'You should tell her soon, figure it out, otherwise you're just setting yourself up for even more pain Remus, and I just can't bare to see you do this to yourself one more day.'

He squeezed her hand, 'No wonder James fell for you'

She dropped his hand, bringing it up to her face in attempts to hide the small blush. He laughed at her, and kept laughing until they had reached the Head's common room, only stopping upon hearing shouting from inside. Slowly, Lily pushed open the portrait hole and cautiously entered the room to find both Marlene and Sirius standing on either sides of the coffee table, looking absolutely furious with one another.

Upon spotting them, Sirius stormed over and grabbed Remus, pulling him back over towards Marlene. 'Tell her Moony' he exclaimed, 'That last night, I was with you after practice. How we both went down to the kitchens with James!'

Marlene rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest, 'Now don't you go dragging him into this'

'I wouldn't have to if you would just believe me, instead of some stupid rumor you heard!' Sirius countered, dropping Remus' arm and pointing an angry finger at Marlene.

'Well I could believe you if you didn't have a cheating reputation, or if you had denied the fact that I accused you of snogging some stupid sixth year instead of just replying with some cheeky smirk' she said, her voice rising.

'I thought you trusted me enough to know that I wouldn't do such a thing' he shouted, matching her voice.

Marlene rolled her eyes, 'Oh please, like I could trust you after all the things you've done!'

'You have every reason to trust me!' he hollered back, 'I haven't done anything,' to which she rolled her eyes.

'Oh yeah?' Marlene started, 'Hannah Stone,' she started, to which Sirius cocked his head in confusion, 'I ran into her the night after we had broken up for the first time in fifth year, she confessed to me how you snogged her in a broom closet the day before.'

'That's rubbish' he whispered, however she continued as if having not heard him.

'Then there's Abby Cornwall, I heard her talking after we had just gotten back together, telling her best friend about the best afternoon ever she had had with, none other than, Sirius Black, two days previous.'

'We did nothing but study that afternoon, I assure you'

'Rachel McNeil, two weeks before the summer break, after that row we had had at Hogmede, now there were all sorts of rumors about the two of you, but I didn't dare listen to any of them because I knew they were true.'

'Nothing but rumors'

'And finally, Melody Thinble, the girl you were with last night, snogged you in a broom closet last night and was simply torn this morning when she had heard you hadn't dumbed me for her instead.'

'I don't even know who that girl is!'

'You're a pig!' Marlene spat, 'What I ever saw in you, I have no idea. Why I kept coming back to you..'

'Now don't go saying things like that' Sirius attempted to reason with her, 'I never did anything with any of those girls well we were together, they're rumors, just jealous girls making up stupid stories I promise you.'

'Well it doesn't matter anymore, they can make up all the stories they want' she countered, 'Because, I'm done, I can't take it anymore!'

He stared at her in shock as she pushed past him into towards the portrait hole, flashing Lily an extremely upset look as she went.

'Hold on Marley' cried Sirius, 'It didn't happen, It would never happen' he attempted to convince her, 'Don't go, come back and we'll settle this' he hollered after her, however instantly sank into the couch as the portrait slammed behind her.

Silence hung in the air as Sirius fell onto the edge of the couch, his head in his hands. Lily and Remus shared worried looks, 'This is all my fault isn't it?' whispered Sirius, through his hands.

Remus shook his head, as Sirius slowly raised his own to look at him, 'You know she'll come round' he stated, in attempts to reassure him, 'She always does'

'Not this time mate,' he replied, 'You should have heard the thing she was saying, you only caught the end of it. To tell you the truth that was definitely not the worst of it'

'How long were you fighting for?' asked Lily, making her way over towards the couches.

'James told me to meet him here, don't know where he went off to, but he said it was important so I came. But Marlene was already here, probably waiting for you. But she was all quiet and I questioned it, then a few minutes later, she just exploded, accusing me of snogging some sixth year after practice last night'

Lily sighed, 'It's going to be fine Sirius.' however by the look he gave her, she could tell he was unconvinced, 'I'll go talk to her,' assured Lily, making her way back towards the portrait hole, 'See what I can do' Sirius thanked her just as the portrait hole swung closed.

Much to her displeasure, she turned the corner and saw a tall figure and a smaller one walking towards her. She sighed, realizing it must be James, and slowly made her way in their direction. He sneered at her as she walked by, and felt a pang of dread for Sirius as she witnessed the two, absolutely absorbed in each other walk by.

'I wouldn't go in there like that' she warned them, the two sounds from their steps stopping abruptly.

She could almost hear James raise his eyebrows, 'And why is that?' he hissed, causing her to turn around to face the couple.

'Because, if you have the slightest bit of kindness in your body you wouldn't since your best mate and Marlene had just had some wicked row and are now off again. Also since Sirius is completely torn up because Marlene swears that they're done for good.' replied Lily, rather harshly.

'Don't speak to him like that!' shouted Jessica, as James stood beside her, unresponsive. 'He's very kind and he cares a lot about his friends'

'Oh yeah, definitely' Lily whispered, sarcastically under her breath, though she was sure they both had heard her.

'Besides,' continued Jessica, much to Lily's displeasure, 'You don't have to go making up fake stories about Black just because you're jealous, and you hate seeing James with someone that's not you'

Lily raised her eyes, chuckling at the girl in front of her, 'Oh, you' she muttered, 'Saying mean things, making up stories, threatening me, flaunting your affection when I'm around. It's really quiet pathetic'

'I beg your pardon!' hissed Jessica, taking a step towards her.

'It's pathetic, that you think I'm such a big threat to your relationship that you have to go to such extremes. However, because I know you haven't figured it out yet, for one, I am currently in a relationship of my own with Amos Diggory, and secondly, I have not, nor will not be ever interested in the arrogant-toe rag you call your boyfriend.'

Both Jessica and James made to counter her, however she interrupted them, 'I'm sorry' said Lily, as calmly as she could, flashing them her most genuin smile.

'I really have to go, you know, better things to do, better people to see. But I'm sure that was a really thought out and well planned argument, that I've almost certainly heard before. I hope you two have a lovely evening' she finished, before turning on her heal and continuing down the hall. Leaving the stunned couple in her wake.

xxx

It wasn't until two hours after curfew that Lily had left the Gryffindor common room, bearing an exhausted expression. She had been trying, with not much luck, to calm Marlene and to convince her that Sirius was telling the truth, however as the conversation progressed Lily eventually came to realize that Marlene had multiple good arguments against him. After Lily had finally decided that it would do no good as to further attempt to convince her that night, she heaved a great sigh, wishing her old roommates a good nights rest and left the dormitory.

She wasn't thankful when she entered the Head's common room to find the four Marauder's huddled around the fire, not speaking. They all instantly looked up at her, causing Lily to sigh, as she realized she was going to have to break the bad news to Sirius.

'Flower, please tell me you-' he started, however stopped after seeing her sympathetic smile.

Lily stepped towards the boy, 'Sirius..' she answered, her voice catching in her throat as she found herself at loss for words.

'You know' he continued, standing from the couch and pushing past her, 'It doesn't really matter, I don't really care, she's just another girl right? No biggie, I can have another girlfriend by tomorrow' he finished, not daring to meet any of their eyes. '

'She'll come round mate' assured Peter, however Sirius just shrugged in reply.

'I'm really sorry' whispered Lily, so loud so only Sirius managed to hear her.

He shrugged again placing his hands in his pockets as he did so, 'It's not your fault, you shouldn't be sorry. You tried and that's fine, besides maybe it's time for Marlene and I to end. I mean to really end, all we ever do is fight anyway'

'Pads' interrupted James, 'You don't mean that, you'll get her back, you always do'

Sirius just shook his head in reply as he pushed the portrait hole open and slipped into the hallway. Remus and Peter rose from their spots as well, making their way to leave as well.

'Don't worry about him,' Remus told Lily, 'He'll be alright, we'll straighten him out'

Lily nodded in agreement, bidding them a goodnight just as the portrait hole swung closed. Sighing she whirled around, half expecting James to be standing behind her, waiting for her to tell her exactly what Marlene had said in attempts to somehow find someway they could get them back together. However she was surprised to turn around to an empty common room, the sound of James' door closing just as she did. Finding herself a little disappointed she made her way up to her own room, perfectly happy to go to bed that night.

* * *

><p><strong>Review, si-vous plat :)<strong>


	15. Chapter 15

_**Friday, November 13th - late evening,  
><strong>_

'You told him to do what?' shouted James, his voice carrying through the Head Common room, as he glared furiously at Lily.

She stared at her hands picking at one of her nails, unable to look him in the eye, 'I mearly suggested.. that it might be a good idea to.. tell her.. and figure out where they stand'

'A good idea?' he retorted, his face turning redder by the second, 'Well, please, tell me if you still think it was a good idea! He was happy, we had never seen him smile like that before! And now I doubt we'll ever see him smile again'

'He wasn't being-'

'They were happy, he was happy with their relationship and so was she'

Lily raised her eyebrows, still not meeting his gaze, staring out the window behind him, 'Happy with a relationship built completely on lies! You know he wasn't truly happy-'

'Bullocks!' James shouted, so loud it startled her, 'You saw them! You saw how happy they were. We all saw it'

Shaking her head, Lily continued, not bothering to get frustrated by the fact he kept cutting across her, 'They weren't happy James!' she hollered, letting her words hang in the air for a moment before continuing, 'You only saw what they wanted you to see, what they wanted everyone to see. In truth, Remus is so overwelmed with guilt about lying to her that it's all he ever thinks about causing his grades to drop. And Mary, made the connection that he was lying to her about something a long time ago, which has resulted in her following him around the school at night sometimes just to make sure he isn't cheeting!'

James made to speak however she put up her hand silencing him, 'Although because of that stupid Map of yours, Remus figured out that she was following him. You know how scared that makes him, that one day she'll follow him out onto the grounds, on the night of a full moon, and he will-' she swallowed hard, unable to bear the thought.

'He won't, he wouldn't' countered James, 'We would make sure that didn't happen!'

Lily cocked her head in question, causing James' eyes to widen in horror, 'How would you have any control about what he does?' she interrogated him, rendering James absolutely speachless. As silence fell in the room, it finally dawned on Lily, specific passages read from her defense against the dark arts text book in third year coming back to her. _During transformation, the werewolf is not able to keep it's mind, resulting in a loss of control. Nor can they control when they transform, while Animagi can do both... Although, as werewolves only harm humans, Animagi, once in their animal forms, are safe to be in the company of werewolves. _

'You had no right to urge him to tell her! You can't just push someone towards a decision like that!' James yelled, his anger returning, quickly brushing off what he had just let slip.

'She already knew James' Lily retorted, 'There was something wrong and she knew it, if he hadn't told her, she would've figured it out eventually. Besides, with all the hints Remus has been letting slip, I'm surprised she didn't comfront him about it before'

Silence hung in the air as James continued to grow redder, 'Stay away' he whispered under his breath, frightingly calm. 'Don't you dare come near him, or any of us for a long long time.'

'James..' Lily started, shocked.

'He's broken, and you'll only make things worse' he admitted, clenching his fists.

Lily drew a deep breath, hanging her head, 'I'm sorry, I wouldn't have, I didn't think she would say'

'Of course you didn't think!' he exploded, causing Lily to jump back in alarm, his voice echoing through the Head's common room, 'You never think about anyone but yourself! If it's not in a book you can study, or taught to you, you don't understand. You've never understood how people feel, how what you tell them changes them, how the way you threat them!'

Lily watched in horror, as James furiously walked around the room, throwing objects as he clenched and unclenched his fists. She was overwelmed with regrett, closing her eyes to keep her head from spinning. Opening them to see James in front of her, looking angrier with every passing second. He raised his hand, then suddenly everything went black.

xxx

**_Friday, November 13th - early morning_**

Remus awoke well before everyone else in his dormitory, which wasn't much of a surprise seeing as both boys would sleep until christmas if he didn't spend an hour of his morning waking them up. While his thoughts were continued to be drowned out by the loud snores of his roommates, he rolled out of bed, shivering as his feet touched the cold wooden floors, and made his way over towards the bathroom.

He entered locking the door behind him, turning the shower on to it's hottest temperature. All thoughts about the day ahead of him were pushed to the back of his mind after catching a glimps of himself in the mirror. He traced his fingers over his new scars, his old scars, and the ones he doesn't remember getting, thinking about Mary as he did so.

He began to fade in the mirror, it begining to steam up. Unable to see himself a few minutes later he sank to the floor, suddenly feeling overwelmed with guilt. Remembering how only just a few days ealier he had lied to her, in attempts to cover up the events that would take place that night in the light of the fullmoon. He told her, with a heavy heart, that because of NEWTS he would be spending the night in the library. Understanding as she was, she believed him, telling him not to worry. However the next morning at breakfast, after he had spend the early hours of his day in the Hospital Wing, she confronted him for she had gone to the library last night, planning on doing a little studying herself although she hadn't, nor had anyone else, seen him that night. And once again, he lied to her.

He sighed to himself, getting up off the floor and stepping into the shower. Lily's idea of sharing his secret with Mary, seemed like a better idea with every passing day.

* * *

><p>Marlene rolled out of bed, to a quiet dormitory. Checking to make sure both Mary and Alice were still sleeping soundlessly, she grabbed the nearest pair of socks lying around on the floor near her bed and wedged her feet into them. Having fallen asleep in her clothes from the night before, she mearly walked out of the dormitory, closing the door quietly behind her.<p>

Not in much of a mood to do anything, care about anything, or feel anything. She walked down the dormitory staircase, through the portrait whole, taking a short cut through the portrait of a llama, straight to the Head's common room. Muttering the password, the young lady in the portrait smiled down at her.

'My, my dearie' she said, 'Are you feeling alright?'

Marlene simply flashed her the best smile she could muster, before slipping into the room behind the portrait. Collapsing onto the couch, in front of the long died out fire. She sighed, debating whether or not to climb the stairs to Lily's room and wake her up. She needed a distraction from her own thoughts, she had recently figured out spending too much time in her head was not doing her any good. Her thoughts always somehow returning to him, and how heart broken she is, how heart broken he looked only a few days previous. Knowing it would be smart to ascend the stairs to her best friends room, she still decided against it. Remaining motionless on the couch, coming to the realization that she could simply lie there forever.

The room's temperature began to drop with every passing second, the cold winds outside, coming in through the cracked window in the farthest corner of the room. Wishing that she hadn't left her wand in her bedside table drawer, she searched the room for something to keep her warm. Minutes later, she found, wedged deep into the couch, a large jumper, which she quickly pulled over her head. As her body temperature stabilized, she was met by an all too familiar smell of dirt, sweat, cologne and rain all mixed together creating a heavenly smell.

'Marlene?' she heard a deep, raspy voice say, coming down the stairs into the living room. 'Is that you? What in the world are you doing up this early?' She sniffed, trying to remember how long she had been crying for. She cast her gaze away from James, in attempts to wipe away the tears before he noticed, however she was already certain that he knew.

'What are you doing here?' James asked, moving her feet and taking the spot next to her on the couch.

She sighed, tucking her long blond strands of hair behind her ears, 'I couldn't sleep, and I didn't want to just hang around in my dormitory, so I came here to see if Lily was awake.' she whispered.

'Come on' he added in good humour, 'You and I both know, although Lily's super organized, and never late she does enjoy her sleep.'

Marlene nodded in agreement, swinging her legs off the side of the couch and away from her body, allowing James to see what she was wearing. 'Where in the world did you find that?' he demanded, motioning to the jumper, a smile growing on his face.

'It was in the couch, I was cold so I put it on' Marlene answered, crossing her arms and pulling the sweater closer to herself.

'I haven't seen that in months, since our train ride to Hogwarts' James admitted, 'You realize, it's Sirius'-' he stopped himself, suddenly struck with a thought.

'That's not why you were-' however upon spotting her face he knew the answer, 'Oh I-'

'Don't worry about it' she assured him, getting up from the couch, intending on ending the conversation as fast as she could. 'It's nothing really,'

'But Marlene-' James started, although she interrupted him,

'You know,' she said, headed towards Lily's staircase, not wanting to talk about him, most of all with James, 'I think I'm going to take a chance with her, if you hear someone screaming, you know she's killed me'

James nodded, a smirk on his face, as she retreated up the stairs. He did wait a few minutes for yelling, however it never came. Smiling to himself, he got up from the couch, grabbing his wand and heading out of the portrait hole.

* * *

><p>'Alright' announced James, waltzing into his old dormitory, where both Sirius and Peter lay sound asleep in their four poster beds. 'Time to get up princesses! I actually want to get to breakfast before it the food gets cold. Besides I have to find the rest pf the team, we've got to get back on the pitch tonight if we want to beat Hufflepuff in next weeks match'<p>

There was no answer from either of the boys, however James didn't expect one. Silence hung in the air, the sound of the water running in the bathroom telling him that Remus was already awake. Smirking to himself, he placed himself directly opposite of Sirius' bed, 'I'm warning you Padfoot, if you don't get up right now, you'll regret it'

He glared at the curtains, 'Oh, come on, I thougth we were getting a little too old for this pretending to still be asleep nonesense'

After another few seconds of silence, James sighed, 'Alright, I'm giving you to the count of three' he threatened, croutching down a little as if to prepare to pounce across the room.

'One!' he counted allowed, as Remus came back into the room, fully dressed and ready for the day ahead, rolling his eyes at the scene before him.

'Two!' James was sure he saw the curtains move ever so slightly, although he wasn't feeling very merciful.

He winked at Remus, and he returned him a nod of approval, before shouting 'Three!' lanching himself across the room, taking off from the ground and landing right on top of Sirius, much to his displeasure.

Angry, Sirius growned and pushed his best mate off of him, sending him to the floor. 'I honestly can't believe you just did that Prongs. I thought we were too old for this nonesense' he said, smirking into his pillow.

'Do you hear this Moony?' demanded James, looking at Remus as he tied up his shoes.

'Besides,' added Sirius, swinging his feet off of the bed, purpousfully stepping on James' torso as he made his way over towards the bathroom. 'I prefer to think of myself as more of a Queen.'

James and Remus shared a look, as Sirius closed the door behind him, not bothering to hide the smiles on their faces. 'So Moony, old pal.' said James, getting up from the ground and proceeding to throw every object in view at Peter's sleeping form. 'Get lots of rest?'

'Yeah,' Remus added, a hint of sarcasm to his voice, 'More than usual, that's for sure'

'Well, you look loads better mate,' James agreed, picking up a transfiguration textbook and lobbing it across the room at Peter, causing him to quickly open the curtains to glare at James, only to shut them again moments later.

'Don't make me lanch myself on top of you too Pete' hollered James, 'I've been up since the crack of dawn, literally, Marlene was in the common room this morning, being extremely noisey.'

Remus looked at James, eyebrows raised, 'What was she doing there?'

James shrugged, 'Waiting for Lily, well that's what she told me at least. Seemed to me as if she was crying, but who am I to argue with her about that?'

'Usual the first in line' Remus said, dropping his voice low, eyeing the bathroom door. 'Have you seen them though? They both want to talk to each other, to work things out, but both are too completely stubborn to do it'

'This is more your area of experties' admitted James, tossing one of Sirius' shoes at Peter.

Remus smiled in agreement, 'They'll come around though, they always do'

* * *

><p><em><strong>Friday, November 13th<strong>_ _**- late afternoon**_

James glanced lazily around the classroom, trying to find something to occupy the time with while he sat through one of Professor Binns' lectures. No one was jotting down notes, even Lily had given up on them after fifteen minutes of class, finally realizing that she could pass the course without them. He smirked as he watched her charm different pieces of parchment into various different types of birds, making them fly over towards Marlene in an attempt to cheer her up. Although when Marlene set fire to a robin that had been fluttering around her, Lily took the hint and turned back to face the front.

Suddenly his eyes drifted over towards the window, when something caught his eye. 'Padfoot,' he whispered, although his voice woke multiple people in the first row. 'Pads!'

He rolled his eyes, as Remus whirled around in his chair across the room, given him a questioning look. Excited, James motioned towards the window, hoping Remus would be quick to understand what he meant.

James watched as Remus quickly turned around, scribbling something on a parchment, before lobbing it across the room hitting a sleeping Sirius right in the head. Much to their displeasure, he didn't move a muscle. Smirking, James pulled his wand from his pocket, pointing it straight at the parchment that was tangled in Sirius' hair. 'Incendio' he whispered, and watched in amusement as the note caught fire.

At the smell of burning hair, Sirius awoke in a start. His eyes going very wide and both his hand instantly flying to his hair, as he frantically tried to brush the burning parchement off his head. Although before he could turn around to see the mastermind behind it was, he was met with a jet of water.

A soaking wet Sirius then instead turned to glared at Remus, who was just stowing his wand, 'Sorry,' muttered Remus, with a shrug, 'I couldn't tell if you're hair was still on fire. I decided I wasn't going to take my chances'

'You'll pay for this Moony' he retorted, 'I will get you back, and that's a promise'

'Well,' interupted James, moving his chair from the back of the room to where Sirius and Remus were. 'What better way then to get back at him then lobbing a nicely packed snow ball at his face?'

Sirius' eyes filled with joy as he excited turned towards the window to see thick flakes of snow falling to the ground. 'I recon by the end of lunch we'll have about seven inches out there.' stated Remus, as a matter of fact like.

'How am I supposed to wait until after lunch!' exclaimed Sirius so loud that a seventh year hufflepuff sitting in the second row awoke from his sleep with such a start that he fell right off his chair.

Sirius wined for the next half an hour, while the others tried to find another way of distracting themselves, until finally James heaved a great sigh, 'Alright' he said, shutting his best mate up, 'I doubt Binns would even notice if we left anyway'

'Yes!' Sirius shouted, jumping from his chair and thrusting his fists in the air.

Professor Binns looked up from the book, right at Sirius, 'You, boy!' he exclaimed, 'What in the world are you doing?'

James quickly got to his feet, pushing Sirius over slightly, 'Sir, I think he's going to be sick' admitted James, as Sirius quickly caught on faking a cough, 'He hasn't been looking too well the entire class, I better take him to the Hospital Wing'

Their Professor looked unconvinced, 'He's right Sir,' agreed Lily from across the class, 'Besides we wouldn't want Black to be sick and contaminate the rest of us. Like the wizarding plague that went around in the 1800s.'

'Right you are Ms. Evan's, you better go with them to make sure Mme Pomfrey knows what she's dealing with' he replied, as Lily stood, ignoring James' hurrying look.

'But Professor, if you remember, in the 1800s even if the air was contaminated everyone in the room had a chance to catch the plague. I think it'd in your best interest to dismiss the entire class early' Lily stated as a matter of factly, flashing Marlene a look, which, upon seeing it, she instantly started coughing. She was soon joined by the rest of the class, and when the look of terror crossed Professor Binns' face, Lily knew she had him convinced.

'Alright' he shouted, 'All of you out, get out! And don't bother coming back until you're better. I don't want to catch whatever you have' he told them, retreating to his office.

Excitedly, everyone in the class gathered up their books, 'Snow ball fight outside in five minutes!' shouted Sirius, 'Everyone for themselves!' the group nodded in approval and ran off to their domitories to put on their coats and scarves.

'But Lily' whispered Marlene, as multiple people thanks her, 'Professor Binns is a ghost, he couldn't have caught a plague even if there was one going around'

Lily just shrugged in reply, 'Maybe teaching all these years has finally started to have a bad effect on his memory'

XxX

'You might be good and talking everyone out of class' stated James, with Sirius and Remus standing next to him, all holding multiple snow balls. 'But there's no way your getting out of this one Evan's'

The three of them had her cornered, Mary had been hit in the back earlier in the game and had retreated into the castle with most of the other students. One hit, and you were out. It was the only rule when you played with the Marauders. Lily frantically looked around for Marlene or Frank, who she had seen only moments before.

'Oh come on James,' she said, half pleading, 'You wouldn't'

He seemed to have faultered slightly, lowing his snow ball ever so slightly, 'If he doesn't' stated Sirius, throwing one of his up and catching it only moments later 'Then I'll just have to do it for him.' he said with a wink.

'Remus..' she started looking towards him, in hopes that he would be forgiving.

'Sorry Lils,' he responded, 'I guess this is just pay back, for all of the detentions you've gotten us into, after all you were the one usually ratting us out when you caught us pranking'

Lily rolled her eyes, 'I only ratted you out because they weren't very good pranks' Sirius gasped, offended, 'Oh please Sirius, you know they were childish,' she added.

'Prongs!' shouted Sirius, turning towards his best mate, 'Are you listening to her? Our pranks were brilliant!'

Remus shook his head, 'Come on Pads,' he stated, putting his hand on his mates shoulder, catching his attention, 'You know they weren't all that good, most of them were, kind of childish'

'How dare you!' exclaimed Sirius, 'Disgrace to the Marauder name-'

'Wait!' shouted James, cutting Sirius off, 'Very cleaver Evan's, turning us against eachother, I never thought you'd have that in you. Good try though, but you can't fool us'

'On the contrary,' Lily stated, pointing at Remus, as a snowball slid down his front.

Remus frustratedly rolled his eyes, 'Really Pads,' he sighed, throwing the two snow balls in his hands to the ground, 'Thanks a lot mate, now I'm out' shaking his head he walked towards the entrance hall, getting out of the cold. 'You two don't stand a chance,' he shouted over his shoulder to James and Sirius, upon spotting Marlene and Frank hiding behind the nearest wall, a large stack of snow balls beside them.

James glared at Lily, 'I can't believe you,' he stated, 'Lily Evan's who are you? Who have you become?'

She laughed in response, 'The real question James, is when did the Marauders become so easy to beat at a snow ball fight?' the two boys looked at her utterly confused, and before they could respond Lily was shouting.

'Now! Marlene! Frank!'

Out of the corner of his eye, James watched as the two in question came around the corner with two snowballs in their hands. 'Prongs' whispered Sirius, 'We're going to.. there's no way.. we're out numbered'

The snowballs made contact with the two boys at the exact same time, hitting them square in the face. 'Brilliant!' they heard Lily shout, 'Better luck next time boys, honestly, you really shouldn't let me talk'

Slowly James and Sirius returned to the castle, trying to figure out exactly when Lily had known she was going to be able to beat them. They never lost, however the events of the game quickly left their minds when they walked into the castle, shocked at what they were seeing.

'Mary' shouted Remus, emerging from the Great hall, hot on her tracks. 'Wait! You can't just run away!'

He grabbed her arm and whirled her around, shocked to see fear in her eyes. Overwelmed with hurt, he dropped her arm. 'I'm not going to hurt you,' he whispered, 'It's not a big deal, I'm still Remus'

She shook her head violently, 'I-I can't be around you anymore' she muttered, under her breath, only audible for him to hear, 'I can't be around someone like you, knowing what you are. I can't believe just yesterday I was thinking about spending the rest of my life with you. You're a horrible thing, do your friends know? I doubt they would stick around if they did, Remus you're a monster!'

'Mary,' he said, 'We can fix this,'

'No!' she shouted, heads turning now, 'Just stay away from me! I can't ever be near you again!'

He watched her go, unable to feel his legs, although he willed them to move, to get out of there. Lily was right, I had to tell her, he tried to convince himself, but somehow couldn't help but blaming her for this. He turned around, and there she was, leaning up against the wall behind him, waiting. He took a step towards her, but was suddenly overwelmed with hurt, and looked back up at her suddenly furious, how she thinks she knows everything, that she can just give advice like that. Remus glared at her before turning on his heal and walking in the oposite direction, knowing that just around the corner was a passage that would take him up to the Gryffindor common room, where he would pack his bags and leave Hogwarts. Mary was going to tell people, and by morning the whole school would know.

Sirius worriedly, made his way over towards Lily, 'Don't' James stated, his arm out in front stopping him, 'Go to the common room, if I've learned anything from Remus is that he's going to want to run, and goddammit Pads, if you don't do everything you can to change his mind I will personally hurt you'

'I'll sit on him if I have to Prongs,' assured Sirius, 'Hell, it's never failed me before'

'Good, alright' agreed James, walking in Lily direction, 'I'll be up in a bit, I've got to deal with her'

He mearly walked by her, making eye contact before muttering under his breath, and giving her a small push down the hall, 'Head's common room, now'

XxX

_**Friday, November 13th - late evening,**_

'James' said Lily the second the portrait hole swung closed, 'Just hear me out'

He glared at her, 'If you had anything to do with this, I swear Lily. Did you see how happy they were together? How they were thinking about spending the rest of their lives together' he demanded,

'They couldn't have spent the rest of their lives together James, she knew, Mary knew and she was trying her best to ignore it. Remus can't change who he is, I'm glad he told her. He did the right thing, now he can get over her and move on to find someone who will love him every day of every month of every year.'

Silence hung in the air for a while, as James connected the pieces, 'What did you do Lily?' he hissed,

'I just helped him, I gave him a little push in the right direction' she admitted, 'Assuring him that just because he becomes a werewolf once every month, doesn't make him a bad person. What he needed to know is that if Mary didn't see that, the girl that he's thinking about spending the rest of his life with, well then they're just not worth it.'

'You told him to do what?' shouted James, his voice carrying through the Head Common room, as he glared furiously at Lily.

Lily stared at her hands picking at one of her nails, now unable to look at him in the eye, 'I mearly suggested.. that it might be a good idea to.. tell her.. and figure out where they stand'

'A good idea?' he retorted, his face turning redder by the second, 'Well, please, tell me if you still think it was a good idea! He was happy, we had never seen him smile like that before! And now I doubt we'll ever see him smile again'

'He wasn't being-'

'They were happy, he was happy with their relationship and so was she' he interrupted

'Happy with a relationship built completely on lies!' she shouted angrily, 'You know he wasn't truly happy-'

'Bullocks!' James shouted, so loud it startled her, 'You saw them! You saw how happy they were. We all saw it'

Shaking her head, Lily continued, 'They weren't happy James!' she hollered, letting her words hang in the air for a moment before continueing, 'You only saw what they wanted you to see, what they wanted everyone to see. Remus is so overwelmed with guilt about lying to her that it's all he ever thinks about causing his grades to drop. And Mary, made the connection that he was lying to her about something a long time ago, which has resulted in her following him around the school at night sometimes just to make sure he isn't cheeting!'

James made to speak however she put up her hand silencing him, 'Although because of that stupid Map of yours, Remus figured out that she was following him. You know how scared that makes him, that one day she'll follow him out onto the grounds, on the night of a full moon, and he will-' she swallowed hard, unable to bear the thought.

'You had no right to urge him to tell her! You can't just push someone towards a decision like that!' James yelled, his anger returning, quickly brushing off what he had just let slip. 'Just stay away' he whispered under his breath, frightingly calm. 'Don't you dare come near him, or any of us for a long long time.'

'James..' Lily started, shocked.

'He's broken, and you'll only make things worse' he admitted, clenching his fists.

Lily drew a deep breath, hanging her head, 'I'm sorry, I wouldn't have, I didn't think she would say'

'Of course you didn't think!' he exploded, causing Lily to jump back in alarm, his voice echoing through the Head's common room, 'You never think about anyone but yourself! If it's not in a book you can study, or taught to you, you don't understand. You've never understood how people feel, how what you tell them changes them, how the way you threat them!'

Lily watched in horror, as James furiously walked around the room, throwing objects as he clenched and unclenched his fists. She was overwelmed with regrett, closing her eyes to keep her head from spinning. Opening them to see James in front of her, looking angrier with every passing second. He raised his hand, and her head began to spin, as she felt herself losing her balance. She wobbled back and forth on her feet, before tumbling over. Her vision blurred and everything went black before she hit the floor. James, curious, turned around to find Sirius standing behind him, his wand drawn.

'What in the world did you do that for?' demanded James,

Sirius walked over towards Lily's unconsious body and picked it up, placing it on the sofa. 'Now she'll just think that she went back to the common room by herself and fell asleep here after Remus had stormed away from her.'

'Padfoot, I don't understand' James admitted, figuring the wand in his hand, not remembering when during the argument he had drawn it. 'You didn't have to stun her'

'Oh really Prongs' he stated, 'Because from my point of view it looked like I did. It was only so long before you were going to do it, so I thought that I'd perserve the little bit of friendship that you two have left and prevent you from doing something you would surely regret'

'I wouldn't have regretted it' James muttered, glared down at her on the sofa, 'She would have deserved it, the things she's caused, the people she's hurt.'

'Did I derserve it then?' Sirius asked, throwing a blanket over top of her, a genuin feeling of hurt in his voice, 'When I was your personal punching bag for months in fifth year? Did I deserve it?'

James frowned, in no mood to be sympathetic, 'Did Snape deserve it?' he hissed back.

Sirius froze, his gaze dropping to the floor, 'I put a sticking charm on Remus when I realized what you might do, he must be furious stuck to his four postered bed. We better be getting back there, after all, I think this is a two person job'

The two boys instantly dropped the topic of fifth year and briskly walked from the common room, each equally as frustrated with the girl they were leaving behind.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Lily and Marlene wouldn't join the Marauder's for breakfast, while Mary would fail to show up at all. Remus and James would take turns glaring in their direction, each stabbing the food at their plates, unable to take their anger out on anything else. Sirius would sigh, shaking his head, while Peter remained confused as ever, having been stuck in detention last night.<p>

In fifth year, it was mainly Remus and Lily's relationship that held their group together. In sixth year, it was his and Marlene's on and off again dating, as well as Alice tutoring Peter in tranfiguration. Earlier that year, it was Mary and Remus' relationship, and Lily and James' head duties, holding them all together, but now there was no one.

There had always been a reason to see eachother at meals and in class, to hang out after hours. There had always been time for the people within their circle. They were going to fall apart, they had no reason to forgive one another.

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry for the long wait, and I'm sorry for any spelling mistakes you might have found, please Review anyway. :)<br>**


	16. Chapter 16

**_January 29th, 1966  
><em>**

_The light from the living room flickered from brighter shades of blue to darker shades of grey every few seconds, while a quiet murmur echoed through the halls, lingering just long enough for Lily to make out the loud, obnoxious voice of an infomercial. Yelling at, what she assumed to be her dad, from inside the big black box, showing repeatedly the one or two functions that the item could do. 'Like none other vacuum you've seen before' the lanky man with big, black rimmed, speckles would say, 'This EZ-vacuum has multiple features..' which they always failed to actually list._

_Slowly, Lily sat up into a sitting position, looking anxiously around the room, squinting her eyes as they adjusted to the sudden change of lighting. She listened, hearing nothing but the down stairs television and the slight calm breathing of her sister, sleeping in the bunk above her. Sure Petunia had her own room, however they preferred to stay together, as they both told their parents, they felt safer. Like nothing could hurt them in anyway, as if they were surrounded by a magical force._

_Without realizing what she was doing, little Lily Evan's swivelled in her bed, looking over it's edge, down at her pink rabbit slippers. With a loud and sudden snore from her sister above, she quickly shoved her feet into the shoes, grabbing her stuffed bear and running from the room as fast as possible. Once in the hall, she could see that all to familiar light, coming from downstairs. She peaked over the banister, seeing mixed in with the light the darker shadow of her dad sitting in his favourite arm chair. A small smile grew on her face as she patted her way down the stairs, gripping her bear as to make sure she didn't drop him._

_She lingered in the hall, just round the corner, out of the view of her father. She could hear his soft breathing now over the television, which comforted her. 'Lily-Flower' she heard her dad's calm voice say, just as she was about to retreat to her bedroom, in case Petunia woke up and didn't know where she was, 'Is that you?'_

_Realizing that she had been caught, she walked into the light of the living room, eyes looking up at her father innocently. 'Daddy' she whispered, 'I can't sleep..'_

_He smiled in spite of her, 'Come on' he said, beckoning her over with a wave of his large hand. Lily's smile grew as she almost ran over towards her dad, allowing herself to be lifted up onto his lap. They sat in silence for a while, watching and listening to the infomercial man, finish speaking about vacuum and moving onto different coloured pots and pans, 'to make life in the kitchen a little more extravagant' he would say._

_'You know' started her father breaking the silence that had fallen, 'Tomorrow a big day for you.. A good night's rest would do you good'_

_Lily shook her head, her short red hair flying from side to side. 'No' she stated, hugging her dad's chest, 'I want to stay with daddy'_

_Unable to say no to the innocent eyes staring up at him, he nodded. Both of them turning their attention back to the television. However as soon as the man had pulled out his third 'unique item' the bear in Lily's arms began to become much heavier than usual. Slowly her eye lids started to droop and she leaned into her dads chest, the quiet voice of the infomercial man and her father's steady breathing lulling her to sleep._

_He looked down at her and watched with amusement as his daughter cuddled into him and fell asleep**.** 'That seems like the right idea' he mumbled, bringing his free hand to his face as he yawned. Slowly, taking her in his arms and careful not to wake her, he stood from the chair, turning off the TV and making his way up the stairs. 'Seven' he whispered, 'Tomorrow my little Lily is turning seven, soon you'll be off to highschool, making friends and meeting boys'_

_'But don't you go falling for their tricks' he warned her, a smile playing at his lips, 'No, you're to smart for that. Always remember that no matter the boy, the most important man in your life is your father, just like you're the most important girl in my life'_

_He pushed her and Petunia's bedroom door open with the tip of his toe, slowly making his way over towards the set of bunk beds, the two girls had begged them for. He softly lowered Lily into her bed, removing her rabbit slippers and placing them in the exact same place she had taken them from, not even an hour ago. He kissed her forehead, while pulling the blankets up towards her shoulders, smiling down at her as he did so. 'I guess I'll have to stop calling you my little Lily. After all, you're not so little anymore' he whispered, kissing her again and backing away. Stealing a glance at Petunia to see her also sleeping peacefully, then turning to the door, closing it, half way, behind him._

_He soon entered his own bedroom, sitting on the edge of his and Lily's mothers bed, peeling off his socks and getting under the covers. He moved closer towards his wife, draping an arm around her waist, pulling her closer towards him. She however rolled over so they were face to face, 'Remember when I first told you I was pregnant with Petunia' he chuckled under his breath at the memory, 'You freaked out for weeks, everyday telling me that you were going to be the worst father'_

_He nodded, pressing their foreheads together, 'Now look at you' she said, 'You couldn't be a better one'_

_'If only my present self could go back in time and tell my past self that, it would've saved us a lot of arguments, that's for sure' Silence fell over the two of them briefly as they fully took in the other person._

_'It was Lily?' she questioned, closing her eyes ever so slightly._

_'Yes' he answered, 'Same thing as last night, came down around midnight and was fast asleep in my arms by quarter to one'_

_He watched as his wife's breathing slowed and watched her drift into dreamland. 'I love you sweetheart' he whispered, kissing her on the forehead before closing his own eyes._

* * *

><p><em><strong>January 29th, 1967<strong>_

_Lily Evan's tossed and turned in her bed, firmly shutting her eyes, just to open them seconds later. She sighed in frustration, trying an old trick that her mum once told her, and flipping over her pillow, smiling as the side of her head was met by the cold underside. However in under a minute that side was just as warm as the previous one had been. She could hear her sister's louder breathing, and after sitting up, only to angrily fall back down, Lily finally decided to spring up from bed. Grabbing her bear in the process before shoving her feet in the same rabbit slippers and heading out of her bedroom, into the corridor._

_She was met by the familiar flicker of the television screen, the light shifting in colours ever so slightly. As she came to the staircase leading down to the main floor she could make out the quiet murmur of the people on the big black box. Almost happily she make her way down the stairs, taking once step at a time as to stall time ever so slightly._

_Without hesitation this time, she walked right into the light of the living room, catching her father by surprise. 'Dad' Lily whispered, as he turned to gaze at her expectantly, 'Anna said that magic doesn't exist, but I told her that she was wrong' He nodded along with her words, 'Is magic real, dad?'_

_It had been a heated debate, while Lily furiously attempted to convince one of her best friends, Anna Tiller, that magic existed, the other girl fought back with the same amount of determination to prove the exact opposite. Eventually they had been told to quiet down, causing the conversation to end, never brought back up during the rest of the day. However the thought that there was a real chance that magic didn't exist lingered in Lily's mind for the rest of the day and even through most of the night, because after hearing what Anna had to say Lily wasn't too sure anymore._

_'My little Lily' he countered, waving a hand in the air, beckoning her closer towards him, pulling her onto his lap once she was in arms reach, 'Of course it is real! There's so many different types of Magic, you wouldn't believe me if I told you all of them'_

_'Really?' she questioned, an excited sparkle twinkling in her eyes, 'Like what kinds?'_

_'Well I can only tell you of one, the others you'll have to figure out for yourself.' he started, 'It's called, the magic of love. It has the power to make your tummy do flip-flops, and your cheeks to hurt from smiling so much. It has the power to warm your heart and soul, nurturing it and cleaning up all the messes. It can heal and break you, it has the power to be both kind and evil at the same time. It's the strongest form of magic in the world, a simply, uncontrollable, brilliant thing that touches each and every one of us, even if people don't show it.'_

_'I..' started Lily, looking up at her dad in confusion, 'I don't really understand daddy'_

_He shook his head, staring back down at her, 'No, of course you don't' he mumbled in good humour, 'But one day you will sweetheart, I promise you that.'_

_'But how do I know what it feels like?'_

_He smiled down at her, 'My Little Lily, you'll just know'_

_'I'll just know?'_

_'Yes' he agreed, 'Just like you know that mum and dad will always be around to help you. Just like you know that every night the moon and the stars come out to stay hello, even if we can't see them. Just like you know that whenever dad's cooking to pick up the phone and order a pizza. Sweetheart, you'll just know'_

_'Just like I know that my daddy loves me more than anything in the world' she added excitedly, burrying her head into his chest as she did so. He nodded, and could almost fell her smile get even bigger than it was before._

_'Daddy?' Lily questioned after a few moments of silence, while the only sound could be heard was the sound of the men of the television. 'How do you know what the power of love feels like?'_

_He smiled, 'You can blame your mother for that one' he said, chuckling to himself._

_'Is she a witch daddy?' asked Lily, happily, 'Like the ones in the stories?'_

_'She's a special kind of witch, only like the good ones in your princess stories. She spreads happiness and laughter, always smiling and very quick witted she is. One day you'll grow up to be an even better person than she is, I'm sure of that'_

_'Are you saying that I'm going to be magic too?' Lily demanded, hope glistening in her emerald eyes._

_'That's exactly what I'm saying!' he responded enthusiastically, pulling her close into his chest as she giggled happily. 'You'll be the best there ever was, the greatest witch of your age!'_

_'I can wait to grow up!' she exclaimed, covering her mouth as she yawned._

_He picked her up, turning off the TV and heading up the stairs, 'Well you can just take you're time. No hurry on that one' he stated, carrying her up the stairs and down the hall. Pushing her and Petunia's bedroom door open with the tip of his toe, edging his way into the room and over towards Lily's bottom bunk bed. 'Now you sleep well alright?' he stated, tucking her into bed, making sure that she was comfortable. 'Dream about all the things you'll accomplish with all the types of magic'_

_Lily nodded, her eye lids drooping, before drifting off to sleep, a ghost of a smile on her face. He planted a kiss on her forehead before exiting the room, leaving it half way open as always._

_He quickly hopped into bed, kicking off his slippers as he did so. 'You know' he whispered, pulling his wife in towards him, 'You really shouldn't wait up for me, you need your rest'_

_She shrugged, cuddling closer to him, 'I can't go to sleep without you here anyway, sweetheart' she stated, tilting her head up to place a quick kiss on his lips before settling back into him._

_'Well I'm here now' he countered, kissing her hair, and drifting off to sleep._

* * *

><p><em><strong>January 29th, 1969<strong>_

_'You take that back!' she cried, tears streaming down her cheeks, 'You take that back right now!'_

_Petunia rolled her eyes, while her sister continued to glare daggers at her, 'Well you can't say it's not true' she countered, 'A load of rubbish he's been telling you lately. You're a witch Lily' she mimicked him, 'I've been watching you, those weird things that have been happening can all be explained.. If only you'd give me your time'_

_'Stop it' Lily cut in sharply, as the two of them stood in the middle of her bedroom, the hot afternoon sun, streaming through the window, making it almost unbearable to be cooped up inside all day._

_'He's a nutter' Petunia continued, not even acknowledging the fact that her sister had spoken. 'Do you know what mum would say if I told her that you've been seeing him? The one thing that she practically forbid you from doing' more tears rolled down Lily's cheeks, blurring her vision completely, 'Lily, he's not a good person and I'm just looking out for you when I say, stay away from him, he's different.. He's a freak'_

_'Is not!'_

_'And if anything he has told you, about your so-called magical ability, is true. Well then you're just as much as a freak as he is'_

_'Get out!' she whispered, her head hanging, not daring to look at her sister in the eyes, 'Get out!' she hollered moments later, gesturing furiously towards her bedroom door, while her sister remained motionless in front of her._

_'You can't be serious?' she demanded, finally finding her words 'Honestly, don't make me laugh..'_

_However, Lily pushed past her, walking around the room gathering various objects that didn't belong to her. Petunia stared in amusement as Lily paraded around the room, although the hilarity of the situation quickly faded when she stormed from it, carrying all of her things._

_'What are you doing with all my things?' she demanded, following Lily out of her bedroom, down the hall, towards the room Petunia hadn't slept in for years._

_'Putting your things back where they belong' she hissed in return, 'Not near any of mine!'_

_'You're overreacting' Petunia sang, picking up the things that Lily had angrily tossed to the ground in her old bedroom. 'I was just looking out for you' she added, dusting off one of the shelves with her sweater and placing various objects onto it. However there was no response from Lily, and intrigued Petunia turned back round to face her sister, only to be facing a closed door._

_XxX_

_That night their father waited down in the living room, steeling a glance at the doorway with every passing minute. After hearing the terrible argument between his two daughters that afternoon, and having to sit through dinner in silence while the two didn't even share a look, he had expected that Lily would come down to talk with him. She always had, after all. Whenever something was wrong or had upset her, she had always come to him, for everything. So he had been right to assume that she would descend the staircase around twelve and they would talk, only for him to carry her back up to bed half an hour later._

_He heard footsteps walking down the upstairs hall, they neared the stairs and proceeded to descend them. Happily he turned towards the archway, expecting to see his daughter. 'You should really come to bed dear' whispered his wife, edging closer towards the chair he was seated in, directly across from the television._

_He shook his head however, 'She hasn't come down yet'_

_'I know sweetie' she continued, rubbing his head affectionately, 'I don't think she's going to'_

_'She will' he insisted, causing his wife to drop her hand from his head and sighed._

_'Just don't stay up too late, alright?' she said, walking back towards the hall and ascending the stairs once again_

_'As long as it takes' he whispered, barely audible._

_He finally excepted the fact that she wasn't going to come downstairs just as the sun rose over the horizon. Sighing, he clicked off the television and made his way up the staircase, stopping at her door with his hand on the handle. He turned it however did not open the door, the small sound of, what he thought to be crying, stopping him. Upset, he backed away from the door and headed towards his own._

* * *

><p><em>XxX<em>

_Little Lily Evan's, just having turned eleven, rolled out of bed with a smile on her face. Opening the window to find a new layer of snow on the ground, much whiter and cleaning than the previous one. Excitedly, she pulled on the thickest pair of socks she could find, protecting her feet from the harsh cold of the hardwood flooring that ran all the way through her house, and she quickly swung her door open, walking into the hall._

_As she passed Petunia's bedroom door, she could hear her loud snoring, that seemed to be getting louder with each passing day. Lily smiled to herself, thankful that they no longer shared a room, and she proceeded down the hall towards the staircase. However as she stood at the top of them, she was met by a very familiar and delicious smell, 'pancakes' Lily said to herself, her smiling growing even bigger._

_She quickly ran down the stairs, bursting through the hall door into the kitchen. Where her mother frantically ran back over towards the pan, tossing the pancake in the air and catching it again afraid to burn them, while he father laughed at her antics, drinking his morning tea. 'Good morning Lily love' he stated, putting down the newspaper, 'Did you sleep well?'_

_'I sure did dad,' Lily replied, walking over towards the table, sitting in the chair next to her fathers. 'What about you?'_

_'Horrible' he joked looking up at his wife, 'You're mother was snoring so loudly the whole night'_

_'I was not' her mother protested coming over towards the table and placing a steaming plate of pancakes down in front of them both, before retreating to the counter grabbing a plate for herself and returning to the table, sitting herself across from Lily._

_'Petunia was snoring when I walked past her door this morning' stated Lily, pouring a river on syrup onto her plate._

_'Yes' commented her mother, elbowing her father, 'She get's that from you' He laughed in response, taking a large piece of pancake and shoving it into his mouth._

_Just then, her mother's ears perked up, 'Mails here' she mumbled, tossing her napkin onto the table and getting up from her chair. Briskly exiting the room, returning seconds later with four letters. 'One for you dear' she stated, passing a letter to her husband, 'Looks like your bother has finally written back'_

_Lily's father nodded in response, putting the letter in his inside coat pocket, patting it as if to remind himself that it's there. Lily watched as he mother looked at the next two letter's, holding one out to show her father, before he took it from her hand placing it along with the other one in his coat. She rolled her eyes and tossed the third one aside, muttering something about the damn advertisements. However she stopped upon coming to the last letter, 'Lily dear' she asked, 'Have you been writing to anyone?'_

_'No mum' she replied simply, suddenly interested._

_Her parents shared a look before her mother handed her the envelope, 'Well someone's written to you sweetheart, why don't you open it and read it aloud' Lily nodded, taking the letter from her mothers hands._

_'Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry' Lily read aloud, tearing the seal and pulling out two pieces of parchment. 'Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore (Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)'_

Dear Miss. Lily Evan's,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall Deputy Headmistress

_'Mum?' asked Lily after finishing reading the first page, 'What do they mean by we await your owl? Surely they can't mean actual owls?'_

_Again her parents shared a look, 'I recon they might sweetheart' answered her father, intrigued by the strange contents of the letter, 'What does the next page say?'_

UNIFORM First-year students will require:

sets of plain work robes black)  
>plain pointed hat (black) for day wear<br>pair of protective gloves (dragon hide or similar)  
>winter cloak (black, with silver fastenings)<br>**Please note that all pupil's clothes should carry name tags.**

COURSE BOOKS All students should have a copy of each of the following:

1. The Standard Book of Spells (grade 1) by Miranda Goshawk  
>2. A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot<br>3. Magical Theory by Adalbert Waffling  
>4. A Beginner's Guide to Transtiguration by Emeric Switch<br>5. One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi by Phyllida Spore  
>6. Magical Drafts and Potions by Arsenius Jigger<br>7. Fantastic Beats and Where to Find Them by Newt Scamander  
>8. The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection by Quentin Trimble<p>

OTHER EQUIPMENT

1 wand  
>1 cauldron(pewter, standard size 2)<br>1 set glass or crystal phials  
>1 telescope<br>1 set brass scales

Students may also bring an owl OR a cat OR a toad.  
><strong>PARENTS ARE REMINDED THAT FIRST YEARS ARE NOT ALLOWED THEIR OWN BROOMSTICKS<strong>

_'Broomsticks!' Lily shouted, bring the paper closer to her face acting if she had read the word incorrectly. 'Mum, I don't quiet understand, what is this?'_

'_It's rubbish' interrupted Petunia's voice, having come into the kitchen unnoticed as they were all far too interesting in the letter._

_'It is not!' Lily retorted, when suddenly it hit her, Severus had been right, he hadn't been making all this up. This was the Hogwarts he was talking about, this was the letter he mentioned. 'Mum, Dad!' Lily shouted excitedly, the letter falling from her grasp, 'I'm a Witch!'_

_However before the surprised faces could be wiped off their parents faces there was a knock at the door. Quickly Lily ran down the hall, swinging the door open and smiling brightly at the tall, bearded man that stood before her. 'Hello' he started._

_She beamed happily back up towards the tall man, whos beard had been even longer then her fathers after he refused to shave for a month and whos bright blue eyes seemed to dance and sparkle wildly behind his speticals. Lily had never before seen a man as strange as the one that stood before her, dressed in long purple robes on a hot august day. However she recogonized him instantly,_

_'Hello' she greeted him cheerfully, extending her small hand up towards the strange man, 'I'm Lily Evan's'_

_He smiled down at her, taking her hand in his and happily shaking it, 'Good' he said, 'That means I've come to the right house. I'm Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardery.'_

_If possible her smile grew even bigger, as she quickly invited him in, 'We just got your letter!' she announced, as her parents entered the hall, making their way towards the door. 'Is it true?' she continued, 'Am I really a witch?'_

_'Of course it's true' he responded, 'However I think I should have a word with your parents first' he stated, looking up at them, 'You are, after all, the first in your family to ever possess magical ability and this whole situation is probably very exciting for you and also very new.'_

_Smiling down at her, he followed Lily and her parents into their sitting room, careful to explain things clearly to issue the understanding of both the parents and Lily herself. As Albus Dumbledore continued to explain the wonderful things about the wizarding world, Lily felt it neary impossible to contain her excitement, sharing looks of pure happiness with her dad as the conversation progressed. It was so hard to believe, one single letter was going to change her life forever._

XxX

_**Saturday, November 21st, 1979. Present day.**_

Present Lily, sat on the couch in the Heads common room, the image of her parents as they came rushing into the hall, so extremely proud of her and so very excited by the idea of having a witch in the family so fresh in her mind.

She turned a different letter in her hand, this letter wouldn't bring happiness. She wouldn't read it aloud to her confused parents, she wouldn't look up to see them almost bursting with curiousity, they wouldn't be there. They would never again be there.

Lily had seen this letter before, she recognized it from the fourth year Ravenclaw that had received in only a few days ago. She felt frightened by the letter, for the moment she tore the seal, the moment she slipped out the small piece of parchment was the moment when she would have to except it, no more denying it.

'You know' interrupted a voice from behind her, pulling her from her thoughts. Much to her surprise Lily found herself to be crying, gripping the letter with so much force that it was started to deform. 'You'd be better off just to open it'

'I can't' Lily muttered, 'I just can't'

'But you know what it says' the voice countered, 'You already know what happened, you can't deny the truth. It's not like not opening that letter will do you any good, it won't make it any easier on you'

'I don't want to' Lily stated more strongly this time.

'For the sake of Merlin' the voice huffed angrily, strutting over towards her and taking the letter from her hands, 'They're dead Lily' he said harshly, getting frustrated with her now. 'Whether you read that letter or not'

She watched as he started to tare open the steal, and for a moment she thought that she was going to let him. But there was some sort of comfort that came with the unopened envelope. The sealed envelope was like a moment frozen in time, if she opened the seal, the moment would continue. However if it remained closed, time would be frozen, her parents still happy, still alive.

Furious, tears now streaming down her face even more then before, Lily stood to face him. 'Get out of here!' she hollered pointing towards the Head's portrait hole, and snatching the letter from his hands.

'Get out of here right now!' she growled, shoving him with much force towards the door. She snatched her wand from the table pointing it in his direction as he once again made a move back towards her. Fear in his eyes, he backed away quickly, running from the Head's common room.

She stared down at the letter, the seal ever so slightly opened. New tears streaming down her cheeks, she crumbled to the floor. Still unable to bear the thought that one letter could change her life forever.

* * *

><p><strong>Reviews are nice!<strong>

**So**** there might be a little confusion here, so let me just clear things up a little.**

_Italic_ - Are events that had happened years previous,

Everything in normal font, it happening presently.

*Please pay attention to the dates!*

I feel like that helps a lot with understanding. And if your worried that it might be getting a little too dramatic, or sad, well don't you worry, it's going to be picking up again real soon.


	17. Chapter 17

_**Sunday, November 22nd  
><strong>_

_'Lily Evans...' _he heard the voices whisper,

_'Parent's killed... someone called death eater's'_

_'Prophet... warning people.. telling everyone to go into hiding..' _

His heart beat was beating faster and faster as his pace quickened, taring down hallways, taking sharp corners. However no matter how fast he ran he still felt as if he was standing still. 'James' he heard his name being called behind him, not even thinking about turning around, the only thought on his mind was getting to the Great Hall.

_'Muggles.. they didn't stand a chance' _

_'They're calling him he-who-must-not-be-named..'_

He neared the Great Hall, the smell of a well cooked breakfast wafting through the halls. He tore down the aisle between the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff table, making his way towards the end where he could see her tea from that morning still sitting on the table. Quickly glancing around the table at the empty plates around her teacup, he felt his heart drop even further in his chest.

There was a hand on his shoulder and he whirled around, slightly frightened, to find him staring into the eyes of Amos Diggory. He instantly felt a burning anger for him, and pushed in down, repressing it with all his might. 'Dumbledore has gone to the house.' he informed him.

'The daily profit' James muttered, until it finally clicked having missed the paper with his first glance at the table, 'She was alone, and she didn't even know it was coming.' He turned on his professor, keeping his voice dangerously quiet.

'She knew last night, the letter came after curfew. You'll be happy to hear you missed her shouting and her crying. By the end of the night I was glad she threw me out' muttered Amos, rolling his eyes

James stared at Lily's boyfriend, shocked at what he was hearing. 'She knew last night? She could be halfway around the world by now!' he exclaimed, causing Amos to quickly shush him, assuring him that Lily wouldn't have left the school.

'There's no way she's still here!' hissed James in retort, 'And don't you even think about going near her ever again, consider this conversation, me breaking up with you for her'

Amos rolled his eyes, 'It's like you own her or something' he responded, 'Always telling her what to do, who she can talk to her, she's already got a dad for that you know,'

'Not anymore,' he whispered, his voice catching in his throat as he walked briskly away from Amos.

_'Ministry must've sent her a letter'_

_'She was sitting alone with the post arrived..'_

_'What if my parent's are next?'_

Within seconds he was outside of the Gryffindor common room, muttering the password and bounding up the steps to the boys dormitory. He wrenched the door open, letting it slam into the wall, making the previous dent even larger than before.

'Where's the map!' he demanded, not bothering to take in the shocked expressions of Remus and Sirius, making no move to roll his eyes as Peter remand sound asleep.

'Top drawer of Moony's dresser' replied Sirius instantly.

Frantically, he searched through the dresser, pulling out various objects and tossing them behind him. He found multiple journals and muggle novels, flipping through the pages quickly before chucking them aside. It was only until the drawer was completely empty did he turn around, ruffling his hair up in a nervous manner and closing his eyes. 'It's not there, where is it? Where have I seen it?' he questioned, expecting no reply.

'Prongs?' questioned Remus, putting down that mornings profit. 'What's going on?'

_Jess and I were there last night, _he muttered to himself, completely oblivious to the fact that Remus and Sirius had both gotten up and walked over towards him, hanging off of every word he said. _She had it in her hands, I told her it was rubbish, she nearly threw it in the fire. _He heaved a great sigh and ran another hand through his hair, _I summoned it while she wasn't looking and put it.._

'In the couch?' Sirius suggested, and instantly James' eyes shot open.

'In the couch' he repeated, a grin edging it's way onto his face. However as he made for the door, Remus blocked his path, looking extremely nervous, he hesitated for a moment, before Remus asked once again what in the world was going on, demanding an explanation before James went anywhere else.

'I don't have time for this' James hissed under his breath, making a move to push past Remus however Sirius had joined him at his side. The could over power him, easily, he told himself. Silence hung between the three boys before James dropped their gaze, his eyes darting around the room.

'The profit' James muttered, eying it lying on Remus' bed. 'For the sake of Merlin, Moony, it was on the front page'

He shrugged, 'I don't read the front page, it's all rubbish these days. It starts to get real a few pages in' stated Remus, walking over towards it and examining the front page, Sirius peering over his shoulder.

'There's nothing on here Prongs,' continued Remus, as he skimmed every article. 'It's all about some Muggle family, two people, they have two daughters, who survived, one was out of the house, the other is abroad. Ah, here we go,' he exclaimed, 'A next door neighbour was quick to identify the bodies. Mr and Mrs-' however Remus stopped short, his eyes widening in horror.

'The last time anyone saw her was a few minutes after curfew, when she kicked Amos out of the Head's common room.' he told them, 'Where was I last night? Why wasn't I there? I've always been there.'

Sirius looked at his two mates who remained routed in their spots, each staring at the floor. 'Well what in the bloody hell are we just standing around for?' he demanded sharply, before running through the already open dormitory door, James and Remus hot on his tracks.

* * *

><p>They ran down the hall, turning corners and taking the fastest short-cuts he could remember. Arriving at the Head's common room to see Marlene standing outside of it, banging on the portrait, threatening to blast it off the wall. 'Lily!' she cried, her fists pounding on the portrait, the young lady in the picture taking cover behind a sofa.<p>

'Lily! Please' she cried, a lump growing in her throat, tears welling up in the corner of her eyes, 'Please, let me in'

Sirius ran right towards her sweeping her off her feet and carrying her to the opposite side of the corridor, where he hugged her tightly while she sobbed into his arms. 'I just heard' she whispered through her tears, 'I-came r-right away'

'She's not in there' he pointed out, wiping away as many tears as he could, 'You know our Lily, she would've gotten out of this school as fast as she could.'

Marlene relaxed into his arms, crying into his chest, 'Sirius,' she muttered, frantically trying to wipe the tears from her face, 'She's a muggleborn. They're killing muggleborns, and their families. If she's out there alone, there's no saying what could happen to her.'

James and Remus shared a knowing look, too worried about Lily to share their opinions on the current situation. 'Alright' James stated, rubbing his hands together and cracking his knuckles, 'Let's get in to that common room'

'As long as you don't hit me dear,' said the young lady in the portrait, coming out into the open, taking her seat on the sofa once more.

'I don't suppose you can just let me in? You surely must recognize me by now?' he pleaded,

She sighed, shaking her head that it wasn't possible. 'No one can enter this common room without a password, strict rules made up by Dumbledore himself'

'Alright, that's fair. Here we go, Lily always made a fussed about out passwords having no significance. Which means she wouldn't have just picked one at random.' James turned to the others behind him, rubbing his hands together, 'Here we go gang, let's put our heads together and figure out this password.'

Without hesitation, the four of them began to quickly throw ideas out into the air, however none of them were a match. After guessing both her parents names, her full name, her favourite flower, her favourite class and teacher, only to still be locked out of the Head's common room 5 minutes later, they became very frustrated.

'No, no' muttered James, 'They're not personal enough,'

The lady in the portrait cleared her throat, attracting their attention immediately. 'If I may interrupt, she did mention something that you might find rather helpful when she made the password late last night.' Remus ushered her to continue, 'She said if someone tried to guess the password, the only person that would be able to figure it out would be the Marauders, having all been there'

'What?' demanded Sirius, 'The password is about us?'

'I don't understand, what would it, what could it possibly be?' added James, both boys stared at each other in confusion.

Remus, however, had figured it out almost instantly, 'Prongs, what did you say to Lily the day Snape called her.. well..' his gaze dropped to his feet, remembering not having done anything to help her during that afternoon, '..you know'

'Oh the usual, _leave him alone!_, _what's he done to you?_, compared going out with me to the giant squid..'

'No, I mean, well something that's significant, something you would've said to her all the time or something that would've really stuck out in her mind.' added Remus, 'What did you first say to her? When she stormed over?'

'Of course he probably ruffled his hair' added Sirius, mimicking the action.

The three of them thought for another few moments, 'We're not getting in there,' Marlene muttered after a minute of silence, 'There's got to be a better thing to be doing right now then just sitting around here!'

Remus walked over to her, putting a hand on her shoulder, 'We can't go tearing the castle apart right away, it's only been fifteen or so minutes. For all we know, she could be in there Marlene' he said, turning back to the portrait.

'I guess that's true,' she admitted, 'I just hope she's alright'

James looked up from the floor, smirking, 'Oh my god,' he muttered, 'I know what it is'

The others stared in amazement as he walked over towards the portrait, 'All right, Evans?' he said, making the tone of his voice exactly how it had been that day. Pleasant, deeper, more mature.

The lady in the portrait smiled and opened, revealing the passage way behind the picture leading into the common room. James quickly ran over towards the coffee table, snatching a large piece of parchment off the table, walking over towards Remus, who had followed him along with Marlene and Sirius, his wand already drawn, muttered the magic words. All four of them began to scan the Map, searching every inch of the castle, then double checking it. 'Would she have left?' demanded James, looking to Marlene 'She can aparate yeah?'

Marlene nodded, and continued to scan the map along with the others, 'Where would she have gone?' questioned Sirius.

Silence fell over the group as they all seemed to contemplate the idea, 'Hold on' muttered James, running up the stairs retreating to his bedroom. The three of them stood in the middle of the room, neither daring to say a word. The only sound that could be heard came from the slight patter of the rain falling against the window. 'Oh that girl' they heard James say coming down the stairs, smirking.

'Why?' demanded Sirius, 'What did she do?'

James let out a small laugh, putting his hands in his pockets as he did so, 'She stole my invisibility cloak, is what she did'

'She didn't' exclaimed Remus, looking up from the Map, officially giving up the search for her.

'But it means sense doesn't it?' continued James, 'The whole schools buzzing, so obviously she wouldn't want to stay here, and she definitely wouldn't want to be seen leaving the school. So what better than to use an invisibility cloak, completely and one hundred percent effective.'

'Wait?' muttered Marlene, 'Does this mean we could have walked right passed her on our way over here?'

All three of the Marauder's nodded, 'We probably did' Remus added, folding the Map up and shoving it into his pocket, 'Now, where would she have gone?'

'Home?' questioned Sirius.

'Definitely not' retorted James, 'Her sister made her home life miserable. She's got to have gone some place meaningful. Somewhere probably where she went as a child, before she even knew she was a witch'

The three Marauder's each seemed to stop and scan their brain for each and every conversation they had had with her, trying to find any kind of hint. 'Honestly, you three' whispered Marlene, heading towards the door, 'Someplace from her childhood? You've heard all the stories.. they were friends way before Hogwarts'

'No' responded James, shaking his head, 'Not him, not anything to do with him'

Marlene simply raised her eyebrows before running from the room.

'It makes sense though Prongs,' admitted Sirius, 'If you ever asked her, the happiest day of her life was when she first discovered she was a witch. Imaging you're Snape, you've seen the signs before, you know she'll be headed to Hogwarts. You'd tell her Prongs, you would tell her all the stories that your parents told you. The day she discovered magic, was the day she met Snape.'

'Bugger' his hissed, briskly walking from the room after Marlene.

* * *

><p>They entered the Great Hall, just in time to see Marlene stomp over towards the Slyterin house, walking all the way down the table and seating herself down right next to Snape.<p>

'I didn't touch her,' he told Marlene, just as Remus approached the pair.

Marlene silenced him, paying no attention to the other Slyterins around them, 'You listen, I'll talk' she told him, 'Where did you first tell her about magic? Where were you?'

'I assume she first found out about magic when she got her letter' he sneered, going back to his meal.

'Now you listen here' interrupted Remus,

Seeing him, Snape rolled his eyes, 'Lupin, I'm surprised to see you're awake at this hour, since I know you rather enjoy long late night walks in the moon light.. Didn't the full moon just pass a few days ago?'

Marlene grabbed Remus' wrist, getting off the bench and standing beside him, 'Now listen here Snape, I don't care about who you think you are, but Lily's in trouble, so if you care about her in the slightest you'll tell us where you first met!'

He sighed, looking around to see that his fellow Slyterins had lost interest in their conversation, 'There was a park, a little ways down the street from her house, Willowdale park'

'If she's anywhere, she's there' Snape added as an after thought, 'Now get out of here, you're ruining my breakfast'

Without another word the pair of them walked off back towards James and Sirius, who were watching from the other side of the Great Hall. Marlene walked right passed them, still pulling Remus along behind her by his wrist. 'It wouldn't have killed you to have come over there' she told them, slightly angry.

'We only would've made it worse' stated James, putting his hands in his pockets, retrieving his wand and flicking it down the corridor, 'Now where am I going?'

'What do you mean?' demanded Marlene, 'Where are you going?'

'I assume you got her location from Snape, so I'm asking you, where am I going?'

'No Prongs,' interrupted Remus, 'She means why are you the only one going?'

He shrugged, looking down at the ground, 'I think she'd want me there, because she can hex me and yell at me. Or cry or scream, and I'll take it. I will always forgive her and always go back to her. She needs me there because I won't ever leave, and I'm not saying you guys will, I just..'

'Willowdale park' muttered Marlene, watching as James' broom came flying down the hall into his hands.

'Gotcha' he finished, mounting his broom

'Prongs' started Sirius, slipping a small mirror into his hands, ignoring everyone's confused looks, 'Let us know when you have her, alright?'

He nodded, kicking off the group and flying out of the castle door towards the gates, intending to aparate the second he's far enough out of boundaries of Hogwarts.

* * *

><p>The three of them would wait impatiently in the Head's Common room all night, neither of them would speak or move. It wouldn't be until the sun began to rise the over the horizon the next morning, when they had all fallen asleep, would James finally walk into the common room. He would toss his broom down on the carpet, his hair windswept and bags under his eyes, he would see Marlene, Sirius and Remus, but walk right passed them. James would climb the stairs to his bedroom, entering and locking his door behind him. He would lie on his bed until the sun shown brightly into his room, unable to fall asleep.<p>

He would remember it so clearly in his mind, searching the park for her, wondering if Snape had given them the wrong place. He wandered the streets until he found, what he could only imagine, Lily's parents house. James drew his wand and raised a shaking hand to knock on the door. It opened, and he can honestly say he had not been expecting the person who had led him into the house, shown him and described to him exactly what had happened, then forcefully demanded that he return to the school.

His would be pulled from his musings by pounding on the other side of his door. 'James Potter!' a voice would shout, 'You open this door right now!'

Frustrated, he eventually would roll of the side of his bed and stride over towards his door, snatching his wand off the floor as he did so and cast a very strong silencio charm before turning back to his bed.


	18. Chapter 18

_**Monday, December 13th**_

The Great Hall was filled with the laughter and the chatter of other students. Marlene looked up from her plate and glanced around the room, she was frustrated with the fact that the other's didn't even seem to notice, or rather they noticed but simply do not care enough to ask. Her best friend was missing, she hasn't been seen on Hogwarts ground for weeks and this doesn't seem to bother anyone besides her.

Her gaze briefly caught Sirius' as she stole a glance at the three Marauder's sitting around her. She shook her head, maybe she wasn't the only one that was worried about Lily. Since the day that James had locked himself in his dorm room, neither of the Marauder's had even bothered to talk to each other.

Although it appeared that the four of them were repressing their feelings, they were all dealing with their worry in separate ways. Marlene, being best friends with Lily ever since the moment they drifted up towards the castle in their small row boat at the beginning of their first year, was having a hardest of times. She would try each day and fail to continue on normally, however each night she would toss and turn until the sun rose over the horizon.

Sirius on the other hand, couldn't do anything but sleep. The other's were a little frustrated to see that Lily's disappearance didn't seem to be affecting him as much however they were completely wrong. He chose to fall into a deep sleep to escape his reality, something he constantly did during the summers he stayed with his family. Sirius had a terrible childhood, with his friends and family constantly disappearing, this situation just hit too close to home for him. Subconsciously he found himself falling back into his old routine.

James spent every hour of his day outside on his broom stick, rain or shine he would rise into the sky until the huge Hogwarts castle was the size of a peanut. He would only ever come down when Professor McGonagall would storm out of the castle and screamed at him until his feet touched the ground once more. James would then wait until she had gone to sleep before sneaking down the halls and out the doors, back onto the pitch.

Remus, in his opinion, seemed to be the only one actually doing anything to find her. Every night he would constantly be going through his old note books and journals. During his fifth year, when he could barely remember the nights when he transformed, he began to write everything down encase he were to ever forget vital information. He was also taking the time to learning old charms and spells that were rumoured to help in the search for a person, he brewed and drank multiple potions that he created that helped with memory loss. He knew the answer to finding Lily was somewhere in his brain, he just had to find it, and wouldn't stop until he was successful.

Marlene looked back up at the three Marauder's, the only sounds between them were their metal forks scratching the plates. 'So have either of you started the potions essay?' she asked in hopes of starting any kind of conversation.

'Nope' Sirius and James replied in unison, smirking at each other then going back to their food.

Remus shrugged, 'I have it finished, I'm just very unhappy with it, I'm thinking about asking for an extension. I'm not sleeping all that well, unlike some people' he said sharply, glaring at Sirius out of the corner of his eye.

Angrily, Sirius threw his cutlery down onto the table, raising his voice ever so slightly, 'Don't even Moony.' he warned, 'I do not have to explain myself to you, or to anyone for that matter.'

'Sorry' Remus mumbled under his breath, realizing he had gone too far, 'Last thing we need is to be at each other's throats,'

The four of them silently agreed to that statement and conversation quickly died once more. Exhausted Marlene put her head down on the table, her long blond hair falling into the gravy on her plate. 'Can you three just at least try to make conversation, this silence will be the death of me I swear.' she muttered into the table. 'I honestly prefer you arguing, it's hell of a lot better.'

Sirius removed her hair from the gravy, 'We're sorry Marls, I think none of us want to talk because we won't be able to talk about anything other than Lily. Personally, it's just too frustrating and tiring, conversation these days is only going to end in a fight.'

'Fine' she agreed, picking her head off of the table, 'Well, no offence, but I'd rather suffer through the silence on my own in the comfort of my four poster bed than in here while other students are having the time of their lives.'

Just as she stood from the table, the entire Great Hall fell silent and their attention turned towards the staff table. Sighing, as Dumbledore prepared to speak, Marlene retook her seat.

He cleared his throat and spoke, 'Now, I'm sure you've all been reading the profit. Lately there have been certain threats on some members of the wizarding community. It is for this reason, and many others that we have extended the winter holidays this year.'

There was exciting mumbling throughout the dining hall, from everyone besides Marlene and the three Marauder's. 'Now I understand this may come as a surprise to you all, however the train will depart from Hogsmead at 10am on Saturday morning. We highly encourage all of the students to go home this break and spend time with their families, however if you are to stay we will be more than happy to have you.'

'If you have any further questions, I would encourage you to ask your Head of Houses. Sleep well tonight, for your teachers have most likely prepared very hard lessons since they're loosing a week of teaching due to the break this year.' with a flick of his wand the tables cleared and the students all stood to head to their separate dormitories.

Marlene sighed as they all stayed seated, 'I suppose you're all going home then?' she questioned,

'I'll mail mum in the morning, Sirius, I bet she'll be happy to hear that we're coming home early.' James said, 'Anyone who wants to come over either for the whole break or at least some of it, we'd be more than happy to have you.'

Remus shook his head, 'I think I'm going to spend sometime with my family'

When Marlene failed to answer, the three of them looked to her, 'I think I'm going to stay here, my family is all in the working, they'll be busy and me being there earlier than usual will just be a problem for them.'

'You should go home Marlene' James replied, 'I'm sure you're family will be happy to see you'

She simply shook her head in reply, 'Besides, if Lily comes back to Hogwarts while everyone's on break at least someone will be here to be with her'

'Do want me to stay here with you?' questioned Sirius as they all took their regular spots in the Gryffindor Common room, 'It's not a big deal, I love Hogwarts over the break anyway'

Marlene shook her head, 'No, you go on and enjoy a nice break with James and his family'

They nodded in reply, silence falling over the group. With high hopes of falling asleep, Marlene wished them all a good night and headed to her dormitory.

XxXxXxX

Sirius placed his luggage on the over head rack, and sat down beside Remus. He glanced out the window as the train started to pull away and heaved a sigh. 'I should have stayed at the school' he muttered under his breath.

James rolled his eyes in reply, 'You've changed your mind about this multiple times, Pads. You're being absolutely ridiculous, she doesn't need you by her side, she's a big girl'

Sirius simply shrugged in reply, however Remus couldn't help but snort in reply, 'That's kind of the pot calling the kettle black there Prongs.' he admitted. He was about to return to his book, however closed it upon seeing his two best mates confused looks. 'It's just, Sirius has stated multiple times this morning that he should stay with Marlene, to which you've replied, each time, that she's a big girl and take care of herself. Now, I realize that everyone's worried about Lily, especially you Prongs, but Lily's a big girl as well.'

Silence quickly fell over the group, and awkwardly Remus went back to his book. 'Moony,' started James, 'Her parents were killed by Death Eaters, a group of dark wizards that are against her and everything she is. Her sister is completely un-supportive and no doubt blames her for the whole event because it was her people that caused it. There's no way she's able to handle all that on her own, and when she goes to her boyfriend for comfort he completely ignores her.'

'So you're right,' he admitted, 'Lily's a big girl and can take care of herself, but right now, she needs someone.'

Remus looked up, 'I'm extremely sorry, I just, I don't know what I was saying. You're right'

Sirius let out a bark of laughter, 'Did you hear that Prongs!' he shouted, 'Remus just admitted he was wrong! He never does that, please can we get that in writing!'

It took him a minute, however James smile slowly grew, until it reached his eyes for the first time in days. 'If only we had recorded that or something. To play it back to him whenever he's wrong again, because you know what Moony always says!'

'If you're wrong once, you'll be wrong again!' finished Sirius.

Remus however rolled his eyes, 'I do not always say that!' he retorted, a smile growing on his own face, 'I don't think I've ever said that! Besides I didn't even admit to being wrong, I simply admitted to James begin right,'

'Ohhh! But you totally say that all the time!' shouted Sirius, jumping up and down, wagging his finger in Remus' direction. 'Whenever we're wrong!'

'Which happens to be a lot' Remus muttered under his breath in reply, looking up from the ground in hopes that neither of his two mates had heard him.

Whether or not they did hear him, Sirius and James ignored his comment. In reply, James had simply hoped up onto the seat and began rummaging through his luggage, pulling out a stack of cards. 'Alright men,' he exclaimed, shuffling the deck, 'It's time for a few rounds of exploding snap'

XxXxXxXx

Marlene slumped down in her four poster bed, she didn't dare look around the empty room. Both Mary and Alice had packed up their trunks, the moment their last class had finished yesterday night, and left for the train that morning, along with James, Sirius and Remus. She had mailed her parents about the long Christmas break last night, to inform them she was going to stay at Hogwarts. There had been no reply, and she highly doubted that their owl got lost on the way to deliver the letter.

They were busy, she was well aware of this. It still broke her heart that they didn't even bother to reply, she loved her family, although it sometimes seemed that they didn't return the same feelings. It was her second-cousins, much more like her bothers, Fabian and Gideon Prewett that on more then one occasion had dragged her to the family events. It wasn't as if her mother and father would've noticed if she didn't show up anyway.

Tears streamed down her cheeks as she realized her parents would never notice her unless she shown so much, unless she had so much success in life that they were forced to be proud of her. In the peace of the empty dorm room, Marlene closed her eyes and began to doze. Falling asleep for the first time in weeks.

She slept through the night and descended the stairs to the Great Hall the next morning for breakfast. The four rows of tables that usually separated the students by house were gone, a small number of tables replacing them at the end of the dinning room. As she walked towards the tables, she recognized most of the students there.

'Good morning' she said, half-heartedly, taking the empty spot next to Frank Longbottom.

He turned towards her, baring a shocked expression. 'Marlene!' Frank exclaimed 'I would have expected you to have gone home over the break, aren't your cousins back yet?'

Marlene sighed, 'No, they haven't returned yet' she muttered, 'I don't even know where they are, and every time I ask they always tell me that it's confidential.'

He nodded, 'Well, I guess that's understandable. They can't let that information get into the wrong hands, you know they're on a very important mission for the Auror cooperation's.'

'Yeah' she agreed, 'I just.. I'd feel happier knowing, I know that probably sounds stupid. I just want them to be safe, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything happened to them.'

'It doesn't sound stupid,' Frank admitted, 'I can relate'

Marlene simply smiled in response, 'So what's the gossip for this years break? Any ideas on what Dumbledore's got planned?' she asked, loudly so others around her could here.

A 5th year Ravenclaw, sitting across from Marlene and Frank was quick to join in on the conversation. 'I heard from my friend Abigail that he was going to charm the entire castle in Green and Red colours.'

'That would get very frustrating,' Frank said 'You would loose all of your Green and Red belongings in all those colours'

'I heard one year that there was a ball!' exclaimed a Hufflepuff boy from across the table, 'The whole Great Hall was decorated in white, my sister told me it was one of the best nights of her life at Hogwarts!'

Marlene nodded in agreement, 'I sure remember that being an absolutely wonderful night,'

Frank couldn't help but nod in agreement as he pulled a list from his back pocket, filled with the wondrous things they could do with the castle all to themselves.

XxXxXxXx

After a fun filled day, Marlene finally climbed the stairs to her dormitory at one o'clock in the morning. She was quick to climb into bed, as her eyelids became heavier and heavier. Although, just as she would begin to drift off to sleep, a tapping noise would wake her up once more. Frustrated, she first thought it was rain falling against her window and she debated on picking up her wand and casting a silencing charm. It was only until she heard a muffled chirp that she realized it was not the weather.

Quickly, she threw her blanket off of herself and ran over towards the window, pulling it open as fast as she could. Instantly, she recognized the barn owl that had quickly flown into her room. She fished an owl treat, that she kept for her own owl in her top drawer, and fed it to the bird. In return, he happily let her untie the note from his leg.

Marlene sat on her bed and tore the letter open.

_Dear Marls, _

_Now I realize you've most likely been extremely worried about my well being over the past few weeks, and I'm extremely sorry that I haven't found the time until now to write to you. It is only know, that I write you this letter, do I actually realize how much pain and suffering I've probably caused you and a few others. This makes me feel even worse, and I hope that you are all able to forgive me._

_I just wanted to let you know that I am fine. Well, as fine as I can be considering the circumstances. I hope to soon return to Hogwarts and finish the term, however I have to sort out a few things back here before I can. There is no saying how long that will take. Now, I'm not saying 'goodbye' in a letter, that's too impersonal. I just need you to move on, get back to doing well in your classes and having a laugh with the boys. I can't express to you how important that is, because I only know realize how precious those moments are._

_Stay strong Marls, yours truly,_

_Lily. _

_P.S. I'd ask you not to reply to this letter because I doubt it would ever get to me, besides who knows who's intercepting the mail these days. I'm also assuming Ben is very tired from his flight, after all it is quite the distance, lock him in the dorm this evening and then let him out in the morning. _

_P.P.S. Stop trying to find me. I say this with a heavy heart, I don't want to be found._

Marlene read over the letter twice, noticing the second time the tear stains at the end of the letter. She placed the letter on her bedside table, and once again, failed to fall asleep that night.

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry for the late update,<br>Review Please!**


	19. Chapter 19

_**Thursday, December 16th**_

Lily opened her eyes not bothering to move as she watched the clock on her bedside table click to 6:44am. She sighed, closing her eyes for only a few seconds before the loud and obnoxious beeping sounded of the alarm. When it did, only a minute later, she quickly lifted her arm out from under her blanket and turned it off, sitting up in her bed and swinging her legs around the side placing her feet on the cold wooden floor.

She threw on her house coat and walked out into the narrow corridor that lead to the small kitchen she had in her extremely small flat. Once she arrived, she turned the radio on and poured her coffee, leaning against the cold stone counter watching the few cars pass by her building down at the street below.

"Gooood morning London!" exclaimed the announcer on the radio, "It's a bright and beautiful day, hopefully the great sun won't melt the snow on our doorsteps just yet"

"I suggest putting on a jumper before you leave your homes this morning, it looks as if the cold winter winds have come early this year, now to Frank for the update on yesterdays game."

Lily sighed, the voice of the man on the radio fading into the back of her mind as she observed her place. It was a small flat, but she had been thankful to find a place in such short notice.

You enter through the front door right into the living room, straight ahead there's an archway and beyond it the kitchen is placed. In the far corner of the living room there is another small archway that leads to her bedroom and an extremely small bathroom. Although the whole apartment seemed to look much smaller in her opinion, as she glanced around at the dozens of boxes, most of which were filled with the remains of her parents stuff that her sister was prepared to throw carelessly into the garbage. She was never going to get around to unpacking them, it was going to be such a long task, one which she was definitely not prepared for.

Shaking her head, Lily walked down the narrow hallway back into her bedroom, throwing her housecoat on the bed and picking yesterdays work clothes up off the floor. She quickly dressed, pulling a fresh pair of socks from her truck that rested at the foot of her bed.

She brushed her teeth before sticking her feet in her work shoes, catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror beside her front door. She looked absolutely ridiculous, she looked dreadfully tired and dirty. Her work shirt was wrinkled and the slightly green tinge to it clashed with her red hair. She had put on a black skirt and pulled her white socks up so they sat just below her knees, so she could safely have her wand on herself without anyone noticing.

_Magic. _She had promised herself one thing after her sister had screamed at her, she was done with it, she was done using it just because she could. Sure, it made her life much easier, however she couldn't risk it. Every time she picked up her wand, the reminder of her parents came crashing down on her making her feel even more guilty than usual. She had promised herself that she would only ever use magic in moments of extreme danger.

Nodding at herself in the mirror she grabbed a thin coat and left her apartment. It was a quick walk to her work, on cold nights it would only take her ten minutes to get home. She had been lucky to find work at a small coffee shop across from which she recognized at the pub entrance to Diagon Alley. It was very rare for any sort of witch or wizard to enter the shop, although in the odd case that one did, Lily could instantly pick them out from the crowd and would quickly duck into the back of the shop. To run into someone that recognized her could put her in even more danger, it was better no one knew where she was, it was better that she was alone.

Lily dug through her pockets and pulled out a small sliver key, carefully placing it into the lock. She figured out the trick to it on her second day, you simply had to pull on the door and turn the key in one swift motion for it to swing open with ease. "Good morning!" she shouted as she closed the door behind her, "Is anyone in?"

There was the clinking of dishes from the kitchen, and a voice shouted in reply, "Lily? Is that you?" they said, "I'm just in the back cleaning up from yesterday"

She followed the voice through the back door into the kitchen, "How are you this morning Clive?"

He sighed, turning to face her, his hands covered in what she would assume as yesterdays coffee grinds. "I'm brilliant thanks, I just love to come into the kitchen in the mornings to find that Alice didn't clean up from the night before."

Lily let out a laugh, grabbing a pair of rubber gloves from under the counter, "I know exactly how you feel, that's usually my job first thing in the mornings."

He smiled down at her as she took the place beside him at the sink, "Why haven't I fired her yet?"

"Because she's so good at her damn job" replied Lily, "You see how she is with the customers, if you fired her, none of them would ever come back."

He nodded in agreement, "You're right" he said, backing away from the sink and removing his gloves, "As usual"

Lily laughed again, plunging her hand into the sink for another cup to clean, "Alice put the money in the office last night, if that's what your wondering,"

"I was" he said, "And how did we do last night?"

"Good," she replied, "Better than usual, considering it was a Tuesday night."

"Fantastic" Clive replied, doing a small dance to show his excitement, "I love when we make more money than usual. It just such a nice feeling, when I first opened the shop two years ago, my parents were not supportive, they said, 'Clive, you're not going to make any money selling coffee, you should go back to school and get your PhD.'"

"And what did you say to that?" Lily demanded, draining the sink and taking off her gloves.

"What I always say when people tell me I can't do something." he replied, "Just watch me"

She smiled at him, trying to keep her mind of her own parents. It was the perfect moment, Lily thought to herself, it would just be so much easier to tell him, of course then the whole staff would find out but that wouldn't be the complete end of the world.

"And what about you?" he questioned, coming back into the kitchen, the tray of yesterdays money in hand. "Your parents must be so extremely excited to hear that you're working in a coffee shop"

She shrugged, "They don't really say much, although I am still in school, I'm not a complete screw up"

"I never said you were, that's not what I meant" he quickly reassured her, "You're still in school though? It's the middle of December, last time I was in school the holiday break didn't start this early."

"Last time you went to school, times have changed since the dinosaurs roamed the earth." Lily quipped back,

He rolled his eyes, "Wow, for a girl who claims to be so mature that was a pretty immature come back. Hasn't school taught you anything about how to insult someone properly?"

"I guess there where just more important things to learn" she admitted, grabbing the her black apron off the hook in the kitchen.

"You're school sounds absolutely charming" Clive replied, grabbing his own apron off the wall, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Lily had to hold back her laughter, "You have no idea" she answered, walking across the small cafe, switching the closed sign around to the open side.

"Oh!" Clive shouted from the doorway of the kitchen, "I need you to close the shop tonight"

She spun towards him, hands on her hips, "And what if I have plans?"

"What if I said I'd pay you over time" he bargained, smirking slightly.

Lily nodded, grabbing a cloth and wiping off the tables, "They'll probably fall through anyway."

* * *

><p>"James Potter! Sirius Black!" shouted Clara Potter from the bottom of the stairs, "Come down here please!"<p>

Sirius bounded into his room through their adjoining bathroom, "You think she knows?" he asked, a worried look on his face.

James sighed, "She knows, you can tell by her tone."

"What do you think it'll be this time? Maybe she'll take away our brooms!" Sirius gasped, following him out of his bedroom and towards the stairs.

It had been an accident, Sirius and James had been practising throwing a Quaffle around, being completely innocent. However at one point it had gone soaring through the sky, past both of them, right through the bay window in the dinning room. Both boys had instantly whipped out their wands and muttered the right spells to put the thousands of broken glasses pieces back together, however it seemed that no matter how well they hide something, it was impossible to keep it hidden for very long in the Potter household.g

"Yeah mum?" James replied, bounding down the stairs into the kitchen where he was sure she would be, Sirius not to far behind him. "Is everything alright?"

"Oh yes," she replied, turning to face them, popping her hip out and placing a hand on it.

She was a skinny woman, her short brown hair cut neatly to frame her slender face. Her blue eyes danced behind her square glasses, she might need them to read literature however she could read the two boys in front of her without them. She was tall, however the shortest in the family, both Sirius and James having out grown her in their fifth year.

"I was simply wondering if you boys could help me carry a few things in from the garage" she continued. Her request had seemed so simple and innocent, although she was perfectly capable of doing these things herself and constantly reminded the two of them of that. Even if she didn't wish to carry the things in the muggle way, she was a very talented and smart witch. Too smart, in James' opinion.

"Sure" replied Sirius, "What would you like?"

"Just the Christmas boxes and that one box of canned food I need to restock the pantry, besides we simply have to much extra food in that garage, we should be giving some of that away." she answered, turning her back to them.

"Oh" and she added as they left the kitchen, "When you get back in you can tell me what happened to the window"

"Bugger!" Sirius hissed, "I thought she hadn't noticed, I thought we'd got away with this one."

James laughed, pulling open the door into the garage, "Like she wouldn't notice, she always notices"

After a long explanation about the window, where Clara looked all too happy to have yet discovered another thing that her boys had tried to get away with. She had agreed with their please and came to the conclusion that it was truthfully an accident, instead of taking away their brooms, which they would've easily gotten back if she had, she asked them to spend the day helping her in the garden. Neither boy looked too pleased about the idea, but they agreed nonetheless, just happy that they weren't in any more trouble.

At five o'clock, she had sent the boys in the house to get cleaned up and had begun to prepare dinner. The smell of a roast, potatoes and vegetables filled the rather large house. "It smells absolutely wonderful in here"

Clara turned to come face to face with her husband, "Oh Harold," she exclaimed, dropping the wooden spoon in her hand onto the counter and wrapping her arms around his neck, "I didn't even hear you come in, how was work?"

"Alright, you know how it is these days," he replied, "We all really missed you there today, especially me"

She laughed, "You know they gave me a few days off to recover from the last mission, but don't you worry," she added, picking her spoon back up, "I should be back at work tomorrow, unless they send me home again"

He hugged her from behind, resting his head on her shoulder. Harold Potter was a tall man, slender like his wife, but had a slightly muscular body that had developed because of his work. He had short dirty blond hair, that was slowly turning grey. "Where's Sirius and James?" he questioned, washing his hands in their kitchen sink and grabbing four plates from the cupboard.

"Upstairs washing up" Clara answered simply, "I made them help me in the garden today"

Harold raised his eyebrows in amusement, "Because of the window?" he asked, smirking at the idea of the boys in the garden.

She turned to face him, an amused expression on her face, "You noticed too?"

He nodded in reply, "Of course I noticed, although they do very well in school, neither of them is an expert in charms. They either need to develop those skills so we stop noticing, or stop breaking things all together."

"What we really need," interrupted James, coming into the kitchen, "Is Remus over here so he can do all the charms, you never notice when he fixes the things we break"

His mother raised her eyebrows, "Oh?" she questioned, "What else have you broken?"

"Only the hearts of girls that adore us" answered Sirius, laughing as he paraded into the kitchen, "There's only room for one girl in our hearts, we simply can't make everyone happy,"

"Ah, the problem with being so good looking" replied Harold, taking his seat at the head of the table.

"Excuse me?" demanded Clara, bringing over the hot plates of food, ushering the two other boys to sit down.

"Oh honey," he said, winking at Sirius and James "You know you're the only one for me"

"Yes, yes dear, I know" she answered, turning towards the two boys, "What I'm really curious about is who our boys have given their hearts too, after all they can't make everyone happy, so who are the two luckiest girls in the world?"

Sirius and James shared a look, "Prongs," ushered Sirius, "Why don't you take this one, and I'll get the next?"

He smirked, "Well if I must," James answered, "I noticed recently that Sirius has taken-"

"I met you!" he interrupted, "I meant you tell them who it is you fancy, besides it's not like it's a secret, the whole school knows anyway!"

"I noticed recently that Sirius has been spending a lot of time with Marlene McKinnon" James replied, winking at his best mate, "You guys know her parents, they were at the Christmas party last year"

"The blond girl?" questioned Harold, looking to Sirius.

Clara smiled, "Oh I remember her, she was simply wonderful! Such a kind heart, and she was so smart!"

Sirius blushed, "Well, James fancies Lily Evans!" he shouted in vengeance.

Both his parents remained frozen in their seats, "Thanks mate," James muttered under his breath, nudging Sirius in the ribs.

"Hey" Sirius hissed back, "It's a one way street, you tell them would I fancy and I just had to return the favour"

Clara was first to speak out of the two of them, "Wow, James. That's wonderful, I don't think your father or I have ever met her, but from what we hear she sounds great!"

Harold nodded his head in agreement, "Of course! Simply wonderful things from the other Auror members. I recall Dumbledore mentioning her a few times as well, she seems like a very smart girl from what he tells us."

It was common knowledge to James that the only thing anyone has ever heard about Lily is her poor story about Death Eater's tracking down and killing her parents. They probably blamed her for what had happened, somehow pining their deaths on her. It sounds much like Dumbledore for him to stick up for one of the best witches at Hogwarts, he knew how wonderful she was, he knew that she was kind and incredibly smart.

What James didn't know however, was that every member of the order knew where she was. They followed her home every night to assure her safety, now Lily returning to Hogwarts to finish her education was none of their business. They had been strictly informed by Dumbledore that they were to do their jobs, keep her safe, and nothing else.

"Oh come off it," admitted James, "You know nothing about her besides the fact that her parents-"

His father cut in, "Now James, I will not have the conversation with you again. I already told you to continue on with your studies and mind your own business on this matter."

"Because Lily's involved, because of the danger she's in, because I care so much about her, this makes it my business dad" he retorted back, frustrated with his father's perspective.

"Prongs" muttered Sirius, under his breath so only James could hear him, "Just don't, not here"

"It is none of your business," replied Harold sharply, "End of discussion."

James nodded, thanking his mother for the meal and clearing his plate, leaving the table and marching up the stairs. Sirius sighed, and proceeded to do the same, following James into his room.

"He just really gets on my nerves sometimes Padfoot," argued James, "You saw him down there, staring at me like he's the boss, telling me what I can feel and what I can't"

"You know him" agreed Sirius, "He's probably just had a bad day at work and you got caught in it"

James sighed, frustrated, "I was thinking we should leave in an hour or so, before the sun goes down" he said, "Is your bike ready?"

"I can't get it working," Sirius replied, "I need to go into town tomorrow and get the right gears, but I was thinking we could just take our brooms, it would save having to sneak down the stairs and out the door instead we could just fly out the window."

"And you told Moony were coming tonight right?" he asked, pulling his broom out from under his bed.

"He was reluctant, he said we shouldn't waste our break with him just because of his furry little problem" Sirius said, retreating to his own bedroom, "I told him we were coming anyway," he added over his shoulder, closing James' door behind him.

* * *

><p>"Lily?" asked Stacy, another waitress at the small coffee shop she worked at, "You're going to come out with us tonight, right?"<p>

She sighed in reply, wiping off the counter, "Not tonight, I'll come next time"

"No you won't" replied Alice, coming out from the back room, "You said you'd come next time the last time, so you basically have no option here. You're coming with us."

"It will be fun" said Stacy, seeing Lily's unamused expression, "It's just going to be Clive, Kevin, John, Meredith, Hannah, Alice and I, and now you"

"Yeah, everyone you know from the shop, just a bunch of work friends hanging out together" agreed Alice, "Besides Clive told us that you said your plans had fallen through"

Lily sighed once more, "Alright. If it will get both of you off my back I'll come, what are we doing anyway?"

Both girls shrugged, "Well get Clive to come and pick you up before he heads over to wherever, so you don't have to worry about a ride. He knows where you live right?" said Stacy.

"I assume so, he's dropped a bunch of pay checks off to my house before when I couldn't come in and get them." Lily answered, serving their last customer for the day.

"This is going to be so much fun!" shouted Alice, hanging up her apron and heading towards the door, "I'll see you girls tonight!"

Lily checked the clock on the wall of the coffee shop just as she locked the door. Stacy had left not even five minutes after Alice did, telling her that she'd tell Clive to get her around 8 o'clock. She took the short way home, snow just beginning to fall before her. She fumbled for her keys at the front door, sighing and deciding it would be much easier to buzz her neighbour to let her in.

"Hello?" the intercom asked,

"Hey Garry," Lily answered, "I can't seem to find my keys, can you-"

"Say no more," he replied simply, "You know, you should put your key on a chain or something, so you don't loose it as often"

The door clicked open and she climbed the stairs to her own apartment door. "Now I just can't seem to wrap my head around something, care to enlighten me?" asked Garry, as she passed by him standing in his apartment's doorway.

Lily sighed, leaning up against the old wooden rail a little further down the hall way in front of her own flat. "I'm listening..." she replied simply, the smallest smile on her face.

"It's just.." he began, not knowing how to continue, "You seem like such a responsible girl, you remember the paper and give your rent in on time."

"How do you know that?" she demanded, raising a skeptical eyebrow.

He shrugged, a grin growing on his face. "You could say Beatrice and I are pretty good friends" he admitted, "You were a new neighbour and I wasn't sure if you were the good kind, so I chatted her up and she told me"

"So you only talk to me because I hand my rent in on time?"

Garry shook his head, "No, no, that's not it. Just by knowing that one detail I could tell you were a good person, I've been living in this part of town, in this apartment, long enough to figure that out."

"Fine, fine" she replied, brushing it off, "But you just think you're so wise don't you?"

He nodded, "Well I can't disagree, I did graduate from high school at the top of my class"

Lily laughed, "High school?" she said, trying to fight the smile from growing on her face, "How old are you?"

"Like 19" Garry replied,

She shook her head at hearing that, "No you're not, don't lie to me now!"

"Fine, 21, and that's the actual truth," he admitted, "If you don't believe me I'll go get you my birth certificate."

"That won't be necessary, I believe you" she replied, "Now, go on, get back to whatever you were doing"

"Shooing me away, huh?" he said, with a chuckle, "Big night out on the town?"

Lily shrugged in reply, "You could say that,"

"Alright fine" Garry concluded, "I'm off, just, try not to forgot your keys next time because one day I'm not going to be home and you're going to be stuck outside, stranded in the cold."

"Oh please," she said holding back her laughter, "Like you ever leave your house!"

"Shut up, I have a life, unlike you" he added with a smile, retreating into his apartment, "You child", he called her before closing the door.

Being absolutely positive that no one was watching her, Lily pulled her wand from the inside of her sock and muttered a quite unlocking charm before retreating into her apartment.

The clock on her wall read 7:45pm, she had just enough time to change and unpack at least one box before Clive was going to arrive to get her. Butterflies in her stomach, excited to be finally getting out of her apartment for the first time, she took off into her room.

XxXxXxX

"Lily!" the intercom screamed at five after eight, "Are you ready to go?"

She ran over to the system from the kitchen, leaping over a few boxes. "Yeah," she replied, "Almost ready, I'll buzz you in. Second floor, the door at the end of the hall."

"Alright fine" Clive responded, the intercom system clicking off at the sound of him opening the main door.

She quickly stashed her wand in the right black boot she had on, mentally reminding herself not to forgot her keys for the second time that day.

Clive had knocked once then proceeded to walk right into her apartment, "Wow" he exclaimed, "Look at all these boxes! You should really unpack a few of these sometime soon"

Lily nodded in agreement, coming into the living room from the hall, "Yeah, I've been telling myself to do that for a while but I just can't seem to find the time"

"I'd offer to help," he started, "But if you think you're busy.."

Lily shook her head, "Don't worry about it, I probably would've declined the offer anyway" she said, grabbing her warm black coat and ushering him out the door, "Come on, we don't want to be late"

Clive laughed, unable to disagree.


	20. Chapter 20

_**Saturday, December 18th **_

"James and Sirius" shouted Harold from the doorway, impatiently checking his watch for the fifth time over the course of two minutes. "I hope you're ready because if not your mother and I are leaving without you!"

"Coming" they both replied in unison, laughing together as they walked out from James' room and descended the stairs, running right past their parents and out the door into the yard.

"Now" started Clara, catching up with the pair of them, "We'll meet up outside the pub in about 5 minutes alright? I just have to quickly run this box of cans to a Muggle shop across the street." she added motioning to the rather large box in her hands.

"Mum," suggested James, taking out his own wand "Why don't you shrink the box to fit into your pocket and then return it to it's normal size after you've arrived safely, I would hate for you to splinch yourself just because of a few silly cans"

She shook her head, "I am perfectly capable of apparating with this box at its normal size, besides if we're going to start fussing about splinching I think you should be more worried about yourself wasn't it just yesterday you arrived to the neighbours without your eyebrows?"

"Now that wasn't my fault" James said, in an attempt to defend himself as Sirius dissolved into more laughter.

Clara nodded, kissing her husbands cheek before turning on the spot and disappearing. "Come on boys" stated Harold, just before he too turned on the spot and apparted away "We don't want to give her too much of a head start"

"Now don't forget your eyebrows mate" added Sirius, laughing as the image of him and the Potter house faded from James' view and the image of the small alley way next to the pub entrance to Diagon Alley came into view. James quickly walked out of the dark alley into the light of the busy street. It seemed as if everyone was in a great big hurry and unable to find either Sirius or his father, he scanned the shops across the street for any sight of his mother.

* * *

><p>"What's all the commotion today?" demanded Lily, running into the back to put in her latest coffee order. "I've never seen it this busy"<p>

Clive simply shrugged in response, handing her two lattes, "Must be the holiday shopping or something, either way we're making money and having a ball so it doesn't really matter the reason, does it?"

"I suppose not," Lily replied, whisking away back into the crowded table area. She placed the two lattes on the small table in front of her, scanning the crowd outside the shop, when a tall woman carrying a box that appeared way too heavy for her small figure was bumped into by a man in quite a hurry. She wobbled slightly and all to quickly went tumbling to the ground, the cans in the box that she had been carrying rolling all over the street.

Without warning, Lily pushed past the waiting customers, out into the street rushing over to her aid picking up multiple cans as they rolled away. "I noticed that you might need a helping hand" she said, offering her hand to the woman who was quickly trying to scramble to her feet.

"I just pray that my husband and sons didn't see that," she said in reply, a big smile on her face for a woman who had just fallen in front of a number of strangers. "I would never live it down, if you know what I mean"

Lily laughed in reply, picking up the box and filling it once more with the scattered cans, "Oh trust me, I know exactly what you mean"

The woman made to take the box from her however Lily shook her head giving her a kind smile, offering to take it instead to which the woman ruthlessly agreed to, "I assume you were carrying them over to the donation box over there?" Lily asked, nodding her head in the direction of the shop.

"Yes, I was" the woman replied, "I have far too much to not give things away, especially at this time of year."

"Well why don't I just go on and bring these over there for you so you can get back to your husband and sons, who I'm sure would love to hear about your little trip there" Lily offered, smirking slightly at her comment.

The woman sighed, "I wouldn't want you to go to any trouble, I can do-"

"It's not trouble," Lily interrupted, still smiling, "I work right over there anyway, so it's no problem."

"That is so very kind of you," the woman agreed, "You should stick around until my son comes looking for me, maybe you're kindness will rub off on him."

Lily couldn't help but imagine her son to be an extremely polite boy after growing up with such a magnificent example, "I would, but I really must be getting back to work" Lily answered, "My boss is probably not to thrilled that I just ran out into the streets, it's not quite my lunch break."

"Just tell him that you made an old woman very happy," she replied, with a small chuckle "Thank you very much, maybe I'll stop in to your shop sometime"

"We'd love to have you!" Lily shouted in reply, making her way through the crowd back towards the shop, placing the box into the larger one before returning to her job.

Alice saw he re-enter the store and pulled her over, "You know, we're not really allowed to just run out like that" she said, smiling as she cleared and wiped off one of the tables. Lily just nodded in agreement, rushing over to the tables patiently waiting to place their orders.

"I just don't understand how you're so kind to everyone all the time" she continued, following her around the store and wiping down a few tables, "Do you ever have a bad day, or are you perfect twenty-four seven?"

"I don't even come close to perfection" Lily told her, "Besides, flaws are what make people interesting, they're the best part!"

Alice rolled her eyes in reply, mumbling something under her breath that Lily chose to ignore going back to taking orders and running them back to the counter.

* * *

><p>"Mum!" shouted James, finally catching sight in the crowd of people as she slowly weaved her way through they making her way towards the pub, "Where have you been?"<p>

She smiled in spite of him as he ran over towards her, "I got held up darling, don't worry about me too much I can take care of myself."

"The box was too heavy wasn't it" he demanded, smirking slightly because he knew he was right, "You should have just let me carry it, it would have made your life so much easier"

"It was not a problem" Clara replied sternly, scanning the crowd for her husband and Sirius, "A young red-headed girl came and carried the box over towards the donation bin when she noticed I was having a bit of trouble. Incredibly kind she was and beautiful, I should send you back there it's about time you meet a nice girl."

"Mum, we've talked about this before. Sirius and I can take care of ourselves, we'll find someone sooner or later and though we do appreciate your help. We got this." he told her, the image of Lily in his mind again.

She thread her arm through his, chuckling to herself, "You keep saying that James, but when was the last time you were remotly interested in a girl, like truly interested?"

"Did the red-head give you a name?" he questioned in attempts to change the subject, frustrated with the constant nagging from his mother to find a nice girl.

"No sweetheart," his mother said, sighing at the sudden change in conversation. Spotting Sirius and her husband standing by the entrance to the pub and ushering James in their direction, "She didn't say."

"Too bad" he told his mum, waving in their direction to catch their attention.

"There you two are!" exclaimed Harold as they arrived, however upon seeing their faces he worried, "Is everything alright?"

Clara answered before James had a chance, "Everything's absolutely wonderful, it just took me a little longer then I expected to take the box over." she replied, taking her husbands arm, "Now that we're done with that, why don't you boys go off and do your own thing and we'll meet you back here around 8?"

"That's sounds great" replied Sirius, pushing James into the pub through the back doorway, "I mailed Remus and Peter yesterday, they're going to meet us outside Ollivanders"

"Perfect" he agreed, taping the correct pattern on the brick with his wand and pushing through the small path that had cleared.

The two scanned the crowd, a mild wind blowing as snow began to fall from the sky. Slowly they made their way over towards the wand shop, taking their time to stop in front of every Quidditch store on the way.

Remus was the first to spot the two other boys standing in front of a window gazing adoringly at the latest Cleansweep. He tugged Peter by his collar in their direction pushing through the crowd, not bothering to apologize after bumping into multiple people.

"Gosh Moony," stated Peter, "I figured you'd still be in a mad mood but I didn't think it would be this bad, you just knocked over an elderly woman"

Remus simply ignored his mate, continuing to pull him along until they reached the two other boys. "There you two are!" he exclaimed, tapping them of their shoulders, "We've been looking for you everywhere, you know you're about 15 minutes late"

Sirius and James shared a look before responding, "Haven't been sleeping that well have you mate?" admitted Sirius, noticing the bags under his best friends eyes and taking into account his horrible attitude.

"Shut it" Remus spat, "You try turning into a Werewolf a day each month and not have it effect you at all. If you only knew of the kind of pain-"

James put his hand on Remus' shoulder, "You don't have to lecture us about this" he said, throwing him a sympathetic smile. "We've seen, we know, we've had to go through a ton of pain as well"

He closed his eyes to take a few deep breaths before responding, "I told you that you three coming along on the nights of my transformations was a bad idea.."

"No" interrupted Sirius before Remus could develop anymore guilt concerning his condition, "That's not what James meant by pain, sure we've got a few new scars every month, but he meant seeing you in so much pain days before and after the full moon. It kills us, it's so hard to watch something so horrible happen to someone who you care about so much."

The group fell silent for a few moments as his words sunk in, James and Peter nodding along in agreement. "Merlin," whispered Remus, "That's probably the nicest thing you've ever said to me Padfoot"

"That's probably the nicest thing he's ever said in general" corrected James, earning him a swift kick in the chin from Sirius who had only acted offended at his words.

"Come on" said Peter, "It's bloody cold out here, let's go sit down inside somewhere"

They all nodded in agreement, following Peter into a small pub across the street from where they had been standing, the warm air rushing to meet them the moment they stepped in to the shop.

At a quarter to 8, Sirius and James said goodbye to Remus and Peter disappearing into the crowd to meet up with Mr. & Mrs. Potter. However as they drew nearer to the pub they could see that it was just their mum standing alone in the cold. Quickly James tugged off his coat and marched over to her placing it over her shoulders.

"James Potter" she hissed through chattering teeth, "Put this coat on right now or you're going to catch a cold"

He shrugged, refusing to take his coat back, "It seems to me mother," he added cheerfully as Sirius took some of her bags from her, "That you're the one that should be worrying about a cold"

"Yes, well" Clara agreed, "I had taken off my coat earlier and given it to your father to hold, then he left without returning it to me a few hours ago"

"Where did dad go?" asked James, following his mother back through the brick passage way, through the pub and out onto the muggle street.

"There was an emergency at work that simply couldn't wait" she told them, "He told me it was very important and that he would hope to be home before midnight"

"You should have come to find us!" exclaimed Sirius, "You could've spent the rest of your day with your favourite boys, instead of spending it all by yourself"

She looped her arms through each other theirs, laughing at his offer, "Oh you wouldn't have enjoyed having to spend the day with your mother trailing along behind you" she said, warning them briefly about their departure before the image of the snow covered muggle street melted away, replaced with the large Potter house dancing with light against the night.

"I am never going to get used to that feeling" complained James, pulling out his wand and unlocking the front door.

Clara laughed in reply as the boys both held their heads, "Go put on some warm clothes and meet me down in the kitchen in a few minutes for some hot coco" she told them, taking the other bags from Sirius and walking up the stairs towards her bedroom.

"Prongs?" asked Sirius, walking into his mate's bedroom after he had changed into dry clothes, "Can I ask you something?"

James nodded, putting down his homework and sitting up in his bed. "Sure Padfoot, what's going on?"

Sirius dropped his gaze to the floor, "I was just wondering, how you knew.." he started, "I mean, you used to talk about it all the time and I know you still do, but I don't think I ever understood how you just knew.."

"How I just knew what?" he interrupted, cocking his head in confusion.

"How you knew you loved her?" Sirius added, glancing up at his mate only for a second before returning his gaze to the floor.

"Jessica?" James questioned further, "How I knew I loved Jessica?"

He rolled his eyes in response, "You don't love her Prongs, you just tell yourself you do to avoid having to face the fact that you're still head over heals in love with Lily"

"That's not true" James countered, crossing his arms over his chest, "Besides, how would you know or even understand what love is and looks like anyway. You haven't been in love, you don't know, that's why you're asking me."

Sirius chuckled to himself, staring up at James, "You do realize how defensive you just got right?" he asked, to which James simply glared at him in reply, "Now will you just answer the question.."

James sighed, "Alright," he agreed, "It was in sixth year, after I had realized I wasn't just into Lily for the chase. She was, after all, the first girl to have ever turned me down which made her a challenge. Although, when I stood up for her at the end of fifth year in front of everyone and she accused me of being as bad as Snape, I figured out that I actually cared what she thought of me."

"I started to do everything in my power to make her like me, when I started to actually change my habits and personality for her well I just knew, in that moment, that I had fallen head over heals in love with the only girl who hated my guts."

Sirius shuttered, looking slightly worried, "Have I changed?" he questioned James.

His mate shrugged, "Well you no longer pull random girls into broom closets" he informed Sirius, "And you're need for mischief and pranking has sure decreased in the past year or so. I've also never before seen you fight so hard to save one of your relationships until a few weeks ago when you and Marlene had that falling out.."

"Do you think I'm in love with her?" Sirius asked, unsure of the answer.

James raised his eyebrows as he thought about his answer, "I don't think I can give you the answer you want to hear," James told him, "You're on your own for this one mate, I can't tell you what you're feeling"

Sirius sighed, heading towards the door, "I figured you would say something like that," he stated stepping into the hall.

"Although" he added over his shoulder, "You might want to owl Jessica, it might be good for her to know that your relationship is over, you're too busy being in love with Lily to even give her the time of day."

James rolled his eyes, "Shut the hell up" he muttered under his breath, getting up off his bed and heading down the stairs towards the kitchen.

* * *

><p>On the very outskirts of London, in a small hut that hovered on the water only visible to those who knew what they were looking for, sat a few members of the Order of the Phoenix. Over the past seven years they had each, along with numerous other witches and wizards, separately been confronted by Albus Dumbledore, in the dead of night, out of few from everyone, in the most secretive and safe places. Individually, he had informed all of them of a secret society that he was forming, linking together the best of the best.<p>

It was rather unclear to all of the newly recruited members why they had all been chosen, and what they would have to be fighting against. However, as the days went on it seemed that there was a new kind of magic lurking in the shadows. A darker kind, a kind that none of them would have ever deemed possible, spells that none of the members would dare to cast.

Of course it had seemed rather quite harmless, a bunch of teenaged witches and wizards having a bit of fun after recently graduating. They were wrong. Over the past few weeks, out of nowhere, it escalated. It wasn't vandalism or stealing anymore, instead those mostly harmless pranks turned into kidnappings and murders. The group of misfits slowly began picking people off, one by one. Although, the most terrifying thing of all is that it wasn't just anyone. It was Mudbloods, the witches and wizards that most Purbloods believed to be lower class, fifth, unworthy.

Harold Potter remembers meeting with Albus in private as he informed him of their Headquarters. "You'll know when you're needed. You'll know when it's time." his old Headmaster had whispered to him before leaving. He then walked out into the night, no word of a meeting time or anyone else involved.

Now, sitting in the same location Albus had first told him about, Harold could not believe how far they had come. The information they had collected, hiding in the shadows and talking the most dangerous of people. The things they had seen, murder of their closest friends right before their eyes and the death of those they barely knew. He had not signed up for all the things he had done, although could not find the courage to tare himself away from the task. "They're building an army" he had informed his wife after she had showed up to one of the very first meetings, "We need someone to fight for us, for our side."

She couldn't have agreed more.

He ran a hand through his hair, nervously shifting his glance to the members that sat with him that night. "I don't understand," he said, trying to comprehend the information they had just told him. "They're not done with her, they want something." he muttered, refusing to believe it.

"She just slipped right through our fingers." another man tried to explain, "We saw her one moment, then within the next two she disappeared."

"Did she leave anything behind? A note, a trace of magic?" he demanded, to which there came no answer.

Harold sighed, as the tension grew thick, "Any word from Danielle?"

"I can go find out if she's seen anything" another woman by the name of Julianne Turner volunteered, standing from the table and walking out the door. Apparting away just before she made contact with the lapping waters below them.

"Someone's going to need to visit Hogwarts and speak with Albus and the others, I'm sure they'll be interested." Harold told those seated with him, "Perhaps he can keep an ear out or ask her friends some questions,"

The other's nodded in reply, "I'll go after the meeting" suggested one of their newest members, Amelia Bones.

Harold agreed, nodding to the wizard who was at the scene when they lost track of her, "You better go along with her, Jeffrey" he told him, to which he was quick to agree too.

Silence fell over the group, as time appeared to slow down. Although it felt like hours had gone by, in actuality it had only been fifteen minutes when Julianne and Danielle apparated into the doorway.

They all looked up at them expectantly and the two women retook their seats before beginning, "There was nothing" replied Danielle, "I searched the area we lost sight of her for at least an hours, using every kind of spell I could think of. No trace of magic, no trace of her apparating, no trace of anything. The only thing she could have possibly done is simply walked away, in which case we would have seen her.."

"Curious" replied John Whent, "Very curious, I don't believe what I'm hearing."

The others nodded in agreement and the room fell silent once more as they took in the new information.

"Alright," stated Harold, disrupting the silence, "This is what is going to happen. We are going to continue to have eyes on her flat, workplace, Hogwarts, as well as her parent's and sister's houses. She's bound to reveal herself sooner or later and when she does, you'll approach her, get her to come with you or if you have to stun her and then bring her here."

"You mentioned before not to use magic on her, just to watch her from afar." protested a lively woman named Ruth Buttermilk.

"Forget that," he retorted, "This situation has become much too serious and I'm putting my foot down. She is not safe and will continue to be in danger until she is in our care. These Death eater's will not spare her and you've heard what Dumbledore has to say about her. Now, it is quite obvious that there's something he is not telling us, but at this time it doesn't really matter, all that matters is that we find her before you know who does, before she's killed like her parents."

"Sorry? Harold, you want us to bring her _here_?" demanded Jeffrey, "That would reveal to her the secret, she would always be able to return to here"

He nodded, contemplating the argument, "Alright" Harold eventually agreed, "Bring her to Hogwarts then,"

The other's agreed, "We'll be sure to tell Albus when we get there" stated Amelia, standing from the table, every one following her lead.

"Now go on home and see your families," Harold told them, ushering them all out the door, watching the apparate one by one before he did so himself, "Or get to your posts, we will continue rotations as usual"


	21. Chapter 21

_**Wednesday, December 22nd**_

"Sirius" Marlene whispered into the small pocket mirror he had left with her. An idea that James and him came up with from being constantly in separate detention rooms, it was a two-way mirror that permitted you to talk with another person. It was untraceable and no one could ever interrupt the connection; it was genius. "Sirius Black" she said again, this time louder than the first.

The mirror was a blur of different images then focused when a sleepy head suddenly came into view, his hair was messier than usual and his face looked dirty, small amounts of facial hair coming in down his jaw line. "What?" he hissed, rubbing his eyes with the hand not holding the mirror. "Do you know what time it is?"

"I know it's early, and I'm sorry." she replied, "But this is extremely urgent, and I needed to do this at a time when I was sure no one would over hear me."

In the image, Sirius had balanced the mirror on the side of his bedpost and lazily lay with his head on his pillow, looking at her through barely open eyes. Too exhausted to notice that the sweater she was wearing was his Quidditch jumper that he had long given up on finding.

Marlene sighed as she realized that this was not going to be an easy conversation, "Can you just please pay attention, this is not something that you'll be able to understand when you're half asleep!" she said loudly, causing him to glare at her through one open eye.

He yawned, sitting up in his bed a few moments later, looking extremely displeased, "Well maybe it would've been a better idea to tell me this in the morning when I'm not in the middle of a very nice sleep" he snapped back, irritatedly running a hand through his hair.

"It really can't wait" Marlene said, emphasizing her every word. "So you're just going to have to listen to me"

Frustrated at his inability to get her to leave him to go back to sleep, he held back another argument. _We spend far too much time arguing anyway, _he reasoned with himself before encouraging her to get on with her point. It was then that he realized this was one of the first real conversations they had since they ended it. Even after Lily had run away she refused to speak with him, and that's not to say he didn't keep trying.

"Well, it suddenly occurred to me at dinner a few hours ago when Frank mentioned something about his parents, he said that they constantly were away, which doesn't make all that much sense." she began, talking much to fast for Sirius to fully understand exactly what she was getting at.

He glared at her through the mirror as she continued to talk about Frank and his problems, "Marlene" he hissed, "Get to the goddamn point"

"There's no way they would've let Lily just go wandering about with her in such danger" she spat out, glaring back at him, "There's a cooperation that some of our parents are apart of, a secret group of the best witches and wizards that Dumbledore put together to fight against whatever is coming because the Ministry refuses to believe anything is wrong"

"I still don't -" Sirius tried to say, his sentence cut off by another yawn

Marlene sighed, mentally reminding herself to never talk to Sirius about anything important at three in the morning. "Let me finish, Black" she told him, "I'm guessing you haven't been reading the profit so I'm going to fill you in. There has been more killings over the break, more families dying just like Lily's, but they're not targeted at random, all these families -"

"Toujours pur" he whispered in reply under his breath, interrupting her train of thought "I know these kind of people Marlene, I was one of them before I came to my sense. They want to keep magic in the pure-blooded, the others are dirt to them"

"But that's not the point I want to you focus on" she continued, flashing him a sympathetic smile, "I understand that some of our closest friends are in danger, but this secret group that Dumbledore put together is made up of the best and brightest, I can think of a number of people who are definitely a part of it"

"Are you trying to hint that James' parents are in this so-called _secret society_?" Sirius demanded, feeling slightly offended at the almost accusation, "There's no way Marlene, they wouldn't -"

"Are you sure?" she interrupted, watching him think the idea through in the mirror, "Just really think about it, when you two talk about them you make it seem like they're not the type of people to just sit around and accept their fate. The ministry is ignoring these attack because their terrified, they refuse to believe them because everyday the attackers are growing stronger and stronger, and the ministry knows that they have no chance of stopping them."

"But that means.."

"For the sake of Merlin" hissed Marlene, "Sirius, get there faster!"

"It's your bloody fault for calling me at three in the morning!" he shouted back, surprising himself with his outburst, "You're either going to have to tell me or just be patient while I get there myself"

Marlene raised her eyebrows in the mirror, taking a few deep breaths as she watched Sirius' brain start to put the pieces together. Slowly she watched as the idea suddenly occurred to him, his eyes widened slightly and his lips parted.

"No!" he exclaimed in disbelief, shaking his head in disagreement, "They wouldn't.."

She smiled in response, "Folks, I think he's got it" Marlene said in reply to no one in particular.

He glared at her, watching as she looked down to hide her slight embarrassment, "They wouldn't know where Lily was and then watch us sweat about it, they would trust us and tell us"

"Are you positive?" she kindly asked him,

"Yes" Sirius replied forcefully.

She continued to look at him through the mirror, "You're sure?"

He heaved a great sigh before answering, "Positively sure!"

Silence fell over the two of them as Marlene remained skeptical and Sirius remained extremely defensive of the family that had taken him in, that had been so kind in exchange for nothing.

"It doesn't matter whether they know or not" Marlene stated, catching his attention quickly, "Because they've lost her, she's out smarted some of the most brilliant minds put together!"

"What do you mean they've lost her?" he demanded, "They couldn't have.."

"But they did, she outwitted them," Marlene replied,

Sirius glared at her, skeptical of the source of her information, unable to believe that she could discover it all on her own, "But how do you even know all this anyway? Where did you learn all this?"

"I didn't learn it, or discover it in a book" she hissed, slightly offended at his skepticism. "I just put the piece together, from what Frank was telling me yesterday, from what the daily profit has said. From the fact that Dumbledore demanded whether I had been in contact with Lily within the past four days and whether I knew where she was. He seems frustrated and is very serious about the matter, which has led me to believe that whatever information or location they had on Lily is either wrong or she's figured them out and made herself untraceable."

"Why do you seem so happy about that?" Sirius whispered, "Isn't it a bad thing?"

"A bad thing?" Marlene demanded, having not considered it, "Well I guess that all depends on the way you look at it. From one perspective, Lily is gone and is no longer being protect by the members of a mysterious group put together by Dumbledore himself. Or, from the other perspective, she's now untraceable, even to the brightest witches and wizards, which means she's untraceable even to the ones that have set out to hurt her."

"She's a better witch then I ever believed her to be," continued Marlene, "I mean, I've always known she was brilliant, but this is just.. she's just"

"Beyond anything I've ever imagined," finished Sirius, "Bloody hell, what has Prongs gotten himself into?"

"Is that really all you can think about right now?" she asked, "About what your mate has gotten himself into, aren't there so many more important things you should be thinking about?"

He rolled his eyes at her, "I just, I'm having trouble understanding just one thing" he said, continuing upon seeing Marlene's curious look, "If the most strongest witches and wizards are unable to find her, how are we ever going to? What if she decides to never come back?"

Silence fell over the pair as his words rung in her ears. In ever scenario that Marlene had imagined, based on her current knowledge, Lily had always come back to Hogwarts. After all her problems had been resolved, she returned because she needed them, never fully able to move past or heal. Yet, Marlene and the others would always keep trying to get her back on her feet because deep down inside she wouldn't have resolved anything after being away.

They stopped talking shortly after, Sirius complaining about being too exhausted to continue to hold a conversation. Upset and tired, Marlene was in no place to argue with him, so she gave in and let him go back to sleep.

"You don't actually realize how big the castle is until everyone's gone" she mumbled before he put the mirror down. "It's so... lonely"

He stared at her, discovering the exact reason she had woken him up so early in the morning and feeling suddenly guilty for having constantly tried to get rid of her so he could return to sleeping. "But you're not alone" he stated, "Frank's there, and all those other people.."

"A bunch of them realized they were crazy and went home to their families a few days ago on the second train" she replied, "There's only about five of us still here"

Sirius found himself at a loss for words, "It's fine" she continued, "Don't worry about me, I must be tired or something and I'm probably just being over dramatic. You go on to sleep, I'm sorry for keeping you up so long."

He watch as she put the mirror down, "Goodnight" he mumbled quickly before the mirror faded slightly and all he could see in it was himself.

Sirius lay in bed for a few minutes before falling asleep, mentally slapping himself for listening to Marlene when she told him to go to James' over the Christmas break. He should of just stayed with her, especially because of the things she must be going through knowing that at any possible moment her best friend could be killed.

* * *

><p>"Garry" Lily moaned into the microphone, "I know it's early and you're probably just trying to get back at me for not remembering my key, but I'm begging you. Please buzz me in. It's bloody freezing out here"<p>

She took her finger off the button, pulling the invisibility cloak around her even tighter in attempts to shield herself from the bone chilling winds that blew that morning. Frustrated by the lake of response, debating whether to simply risk it and use magic to open the door, Lily sat down on the stoop.

The sun had just begun to peek over the horizon, however the semi-tall buildings that lined her street blocked out the beautiful sunrise. Sighing, she pulled her wand from her boot, fingering it before quickly returning it to it's place. Usually she would've simply use her magic, but now that she was fully aware that she was being followed and watch, it wouldn't be safe to use it.

She was exhausted, tired of running, and traveling under an invisibility cloak even though she had only started doing it four days ago. However, that Saturday night on her way home she had discovered that she was actually being followed she had deemed all the precautions that she thought she would have to do, completely necessary. From that moment on, Lily had vowed not to use magic, not matter what, for it was easily tracked especially for extremely advanced wizards.

She had stepped out early in the morning just as the sun was peaking over the horizon. She handed in a resignation letter at her work, apologizing greatly for the lack of a notice. She had decided she would not go back to work, it was too common. They would surely be looking there, observing it, whoever _they_ were. No contact with any of the people she had met, they would know her friends inside out by now. The danger she had put them in, just by knowing her, was unimaginable.

If her situation was going to do anything, it was going to help her grow. Lily was going to change. She had unwillingly climbed out of bed and thrown James' invisibility cloak over her head, she needed to be unrecognizable, she needed to blend in with everyone around her. With the little money she had she traveled to the furthest convenience store, buying a pair of scissors, a small bottle of bleach and a box of hair colouring.

In the closest gas station washroom, using the sink and mirror she rinsed the bleach through her hair. Within minutes her fiery red hair was discoloured and faded. As she waited for the hair dye to change her hair colour completely, she picked up the scissors.

As she excited the washroom, she glanced around the road and slowly pulled the invisibility cloak of herself. Stopping only for a second when catching a glimpse of herself in the reflection of the shop. Her long red hair was short and blonde, a colour that mirrored Marlene's. No longer could she hid behind her bangs, or feel the winds blowing through her hair.

"Good god" hissed Garry, running across the street towards where she currently sat on her apartment steps, "Is that really you?"

Lily jolted out of her musings, staring down at the ground as she slowly nodded her head, feeling embarrassed but having nothing to hide behind, "I left when it was still dark out to go to the drug store and pick up a few more things."

"What in world have you done to your hair?!" he demanded, still in shock.

"Changed it" she replied defensively, "Besides, where the hell have you been? I didn't even think you ever left your apartment!"

He sighed, pulling his keys out of his pockets, "I was at work, usually I'm back before now but it was a rough night." Garry said, unlocking the door and ushering Lily inside to the warmth of the building.

"Why were you waiting outside anyway?" he asked as they climbed the stairs towards their floor.

At first she didn't answer him, knowing that he wouldn't be pleased with the answer, however he was extremely persistent. "I forgot my keys" she whispered under her breath.

"You've been sitting outside all this time?" Garry exclaimed, stopping on the steps, glaring at her. "It's freezing out there, and who knows what kind of dangers were out there!"

She glared back at him, "You're protective behaviour is starting to really get on my nerves." Lily hissed back in reply, turning and continuing back up the stairs.

"I'm just looking out for you" he reasoned, following in her footsteps.

Lily arrived at her door and pushing it open, "Well, don't. I've got enough people looking for me" she drew a short breath before correcting herself, "enough people looking _out_ for me"

Garry raised his eyebrows, "A boyfriend?" he demanded, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned against his own apartment door, "Where's this guy when you're in such a mess? Because don't think I haven't noticed, somethings wrong. Something you're not telling me."

"Not a boyfriend" she replied sternly, mumbling about her ability to take care of herself.

He let out a low whistle in reply, smirking at the tone of her response. Although when she continued to glare in his direction, he dropped the subject, unlocking and opening his own apartment door,

"Well, I'm off to bed after the night I've had. You know where to find me if you need me" Garry said, walking into his apartment, "Oh, and don't go wandering off again" he added, before closing his door behind him.

She sighed in frustration, making her way into her own apartment and locking the door behind her. _James, _she thought to herself, _if only he could see me now. Unstoppable; hidden in plain slight. _

* * *

><p>Remus woke that morning and remained motionless in his bed as his head throbbed with pain. His transformation six days ago was one of the worst ones he can remember. It had seemed as if this time the small part of him that usually remained had completely been replaced. All his anger and frustration surfacing forcing him to take it out on himself.<p>

Across his cheek bone there was a fresh deep wound, that Remus was sure would never fully heal, no matter how many charms and potions his parents tried to use. Frustrated after having spotted his reflection the previous morning he had vanished all reflective surfaces from his room, too ashamed of himself. It wasn't one of his most brilliant moments as a person, although he reasoned that vanished them was better than smashing them all to pieces.

His parents always avoided him during the few days before and after a full moon, only entering his room to bring him healing potion or food of some sort, which he refused to eat. They would eventually notice the absence of mirrors in his room, however would cease to question him. They would never admit it but they're terrified of him, the things he does on the night of the full moon. It seems as if even the people closest to him, although they would never say it, are extremely frightened by him.

All except for one, he reasoned with himself, Lily. There was just something different about the way she reacted, not surprised or shocked. She had discovered it on her own and had adored him all the same. She saw things in him that everyone close to him failed to see, even himself. It was weird to think, but he missed her, it had never occurred to him how much he cared for her opinion and her presence. It was the smile that she would give him after his transformation, she doesn't just simply ignore his condition, when no one else is around she'll bring it up and ask him questions as if it's completely normal.

Remus knows that she isn't afraid, although she's never really had a reason to be. His fellow Marauder's have seen him kill and hurt, they even have their own scars because of him. His parents have had to watch and hear all the horrible things he's done even as a child, but they're tired and he can tell. They want out, they don't want to have to deal with him any more, it's been going on for too long already. He would leave the house eventually, the moment he's finished school. They'll never admit it, but it'll be one of the happiest days of their lives, he's ridding them of a burden that they've had to deal with for of so many years.

Remus rolled out of his bed and quickly dressed, opening his window and climbing out on to the rooftop. He scaled over towards the trellis leaning up against the outside of their house, he used it as a ladder like many times before and took off down the street towards the small town a few miles away. After he had been bitten they moved into a small house in the middle of no where so he wouldn't accidentally run into anyone during the nights of his transformation and hurt them.

"Ah, Mr. Lupin!" exclaimed the book store owner. "You'll be glad to here about the new releases were getting in, oh boy, aren't they a good read."

He smiled brightly, walking up to the counter, "The Tale of Two Cities, unedited, re-released." continued the owner, studying the few scars on his face, "Have you read the original?"

"Oh of course I have," Remus responded, not realizing what the man was staring at, "I couldn't put it down"

"Well then, you'll simply love this version," he added, taking a copy out from under the counter and sliding it over towards Remus. The scars looked new and the owner couldn't help but wonder what the boy had gotten himself into.

Remus dug through his pocket, pull out a handful of change. "How much is it?"

The owner shrugged, "How much you got?" he replied. _Maybe his situation was finally getting to him, a poor family, having had to move around so much neither of his parents could hold down a steady job, _he thought to himself, _it's a real __shame to see such a smart boy getting into trouble like that. _

Remus eyed the change in his hand, placing it all down on the counter, "Looks to be about four-fifty" he said allowed, inwardly sighing.

The owner slide the book further over towards Remus, taking the money he had put on the counter, "That's absolutely fine!" he exclaimed, "Consider it an early Christmas present,"

"Thank you very much!" he replied enthusiastically, "I really appreciate it!"

The owner shrugged in reply as if it was nothing, "Have a very Happy Christmas!" Remus said, heading towards the exit.

"Now, you stay out of trouble boy!" the owner replied, waving as he walked out into the cold morning, "And a Merry Christmas to you too!"

Remus thought nothing of the concern in the man's voice, although as he rounded the corner towards his street it suddenly hit him. Quickly he ran a hand across the scar across his cheek bone and realized that if it looked as bad as it felt then the owner had every right to be worried about him. He flushed in embarrassment, dropping his head down low to avoid the eyes of all his neighbours.

He sighed upon climbing back in through his bedroom window, pulling the drapes closed behind him he grabbed a pen and paper. Wishing he could talk to Lily, wishing he could write to her. Frustrated, he tossed the items aside and collapsed into bed, vowing to stay in the darkness of his own room until he could return to Hogwarts.


	22. Chapter 22

_**Friday, December 31st**_

Harold Potter tossed in his sleep, the idea of a targeted teenaged girl gallivanting around London completely invisible to the most strongest witches in wizards in which most of them excelled in tracking and monitoring. It seemed almost impossible that she could simply be there one moment and gone the next without leaving any trace of magic behind her.

Frustrated at his inability to fall asleep, he rolled up into a sitting position and placed his feet on the ground. Harold Potter heaved a great sigh, running his hands through his hair before standing and walking over towards the bay window in their room that over looked a large, dark forest behind their house. Everyday that she remained hidden made it harder for the Order to continue to hope that she was still alive and had not been murdered shortly after the deaths of her parents.

"Hun?" he heard his wife whisper into the darkness, "You need not worry about that girl, I hear from James and Sirius that she's very strong and extremely capable of taking care of herself."

He sighed, "But, what if this time the other guys were stronger?" he responded, hanging his head in disappointment, "It's our duty to protect those who need protection, Clara, and lately I find we're constantly failing to do so."

She urged him to come back to bed, "Sweetheart, you're doing the best you can."

"I can't sleep, Clara, because every time I close my eyes I see her helpless and dying, and no one is around to save her." He confessed, "I'm so overwhelmed with guilt, I find that I'm unable to do anything else because of that."

"Harold," continued his wife, sitting up in the bed. "Did it ever occur to you that maybe this girl didn't want to be found, maybe she wants to just be invisible for a while."

He nodded his agreement, repeating her words in his head when he suddenly had an idea, "Invisible.." he muttered under his breath, "She was there one second and then, simply, gone. Like magic except there was no trace of it.."

"Hun, I don't think I understand where you're going with this.." Clara stated, placing a hand on his shoulder.

He looked at her, a new light in his eyes. "She's not gone! She's just invisible" he said once more for his wife, hoping that she could piece the rest together herself. "I need to speak to James and Sirius,"

"No," retorted his wife, pushing him down to prevent him from getting up, "This can wait, you can talk to them first thing in the morning."

"I don't think you understand the seriousness of this situation, Sweetheart" he informed her,

Clara rolled her eyes, "I understand alright," she said to him, "You have a saving people thing."

"What do you mean?"

"You constantly have to be the hero, you constantly have to save people who you think are in trouble." she bluntly told him, "A quality you unfortunately passed on to your son, and I'm even starting to see it in Sirius as well these days!"

"How is having a saving people thing bad?" he demanded, kissing her on the forehead.

She sighed, "Because you aren't able to tell when people don't want to be saved. Sometimes people just want to disappear, they want to be alone or with people who don't know who they are, that don't have the slightest idea about what has happened in their past."

"But that's a horrible way to deal with grief or depression!" Harold retorted,

His wife did not disagree, "Sometimes at the start of things, it's easier to hide from the truth and to pretend nothing happened just for a little while. Until people are ready to face what they've run from."

"So, what you're saying.." he continued, "Is that you don't think we should continue looking for her, that we should just let her be?"

Clara nodded, "That is correct," she said, "Although, I know you, and you won't stop looking. It's just who you are, you never give up, another quality passed on to James." she added, smiling to herself, "Sirius mentioned to me that he's been chasing after this one girl for years!"

"That sounds familiar doesn't it?" Harold demanded, pulling his wife closer to which she simply laughed in reply. "He'll end up with her though, I know he will."

"Oh?" asked his wife, "And how can you be positive"

He shrugged as if he wasn't sure, "Because I got my girl eventually"

The two were quick to fall back into an extremely peaceful sleep in the safety of each others arms. Dreaming about their years at Hogwarts, all the moments Harold spent chasing after Clara, the moment when she finally stopped running and let herself fall in love. Neither of which had any clue as to how similar a situation their son was going through, although if they had they would've smiled knowing at each other. They both knew, that no matter how long you ran from something, it always caught up, in the end you would always have to face it.

The sun rose over the horizon the next morning as snow continued to fall. The euphoria of the night earlier, reliving all his past memories, quickly fading as his guilt resurfaced upon feeling the cold winter winds blow into their warm house through an open window. Harold knew his wife was right, he would not stop looking for the Evan's girl and with the terrible weather he questioned how she could ask him to stop.

* * *

><p>Lily had returned to her building around the same time that Harold Potter had woken up with worry the same night. After having done a small bit of Christmas shopping at the twenty-four hour superstore with the very little money she had earned working at the Coffee shop, money that hadn't been spent on rent or groceries. She rummaged through her bags, standing outside the building entrance in search of her keys. After what had seemed like an hour did she find her keys, closing her fist around them and pulling them out, shoving the correct key into the lock as quickly as possible.<p>

It was warmer inside the threshold now that she was shielded from the horrifying cold wind. There was an eerie silence that hung in the stairwell, the small wall light flickering on and off with every few passing seconds. Lily pulled her wand from the inside pocket of her winter jacket, playing with it in her hands as she climbed the stairs to her apartment.

Her stomach began to turn with every step she took. She kept climbing, ignoring her gut feeling to discard her bags and run from the building. She finally stopped upon spotting her slightly ajar apartment door, trying and failing to find a reasonable explination for why it would be left open. The broken lock hung in many pieces from the knob, at that sight she reached into the bags once more and pulled out James' invisibility cloak. She placed her bags on the landing of the steps and quietly edged closer towards the broken door.

It made a terrible creaking sound as she pushed it open with the tip of her toe. Once inside, by the light of the moon shining in from the outside, she could tell that everything in the room was overturned. Her parents old boxes had been blast aside, her furniture torn apart and windows broken. In the back of her mind she heard her friends worried comments, trying to convince her to turn around and run, to leave and never come back. But, through the terrible pounding in her head she could hear a small voice, edging her on. _Do it.. do it.. look around.. you have so many questions and no answers. _Too bad her friends weren't here, she reasoned, otherwise they might have actually succeed on getting her to abandon her curiosity.

She made her way around the room looking behind objects and into dark corners, in search of something, of anything that could give her an answer. _Who are they? What do they want with me? Why did they kill my family?_ The questioned seemed so simple but they were the ones that kept her awake every night.

There was a small noise from somewhere close to pulling her from her musings, causing her to jump. She moved slowly over towards the source of the sound, making her way down towards her bedroom. "You're sure this was the place?" she heard someone whisper, although before she could move any further three figures appeared in the hall, quickly walking towards her. Invisible to them, she jumped out of their way just in time for them to pass.

Cowering in the perfect corner just beyond the archway of the hall, she had view of all three figures as they searched once mroe through the kitchen and the livingroom. "Are you doubting me" the other more female voice responded, "I thought you were smarter than that"

"I'm just worried because if we return with nothing to show for this" hissed the other in response, "He'll have our heads"

The voices continued to whisper, pointing out certain distincful objects that would only suggest she was a Hogwarts Gryffindor student. Lily thought after a few minutes that she had begun to recognize the voices but she couldn't quite remember where exactly she had heard them before. They spoke calmly, though if she listened hard enough she could hear the worry in their voices, not having anything to show for their raid.

Just as it looked as if they were about to give up and leave, taking a few objects that could help them prove their night wasn't a huge wait of time, just as Lily was sure they were about to aparate away back to wherever it was they came from, she heard someone start to come up the stairs. In her head she prayed for them to ignore her discarded bags and the broken door, or better notice them and leave to return with the police by which time they would all be gone. Unfortuntely, they did eventually call out into the darkness,

"Lily?" they asked, "Are you in there? Is everything alright?"

Her heart sank when she realized it could only be Garry returning home after one of his last late night shifts. The three figures shared a few looks, whether or not they were worried or happy Lily could not tell. "Well, well" said the third voice, "It looks as if we might actually have something of value to show for this evening."

Quietly, Lily rose from her corner and walked into the main room just as Garry pushed open her front door. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust, and there was another silence as he took in the destroyed apartment, the broken windows and the three dark figures standing in the middle of the room. "Who are you?" he demanded, barging into the room trying to turn on the lights that had also been broken.

"Where is she?" one asked in reply, taking a steps towards him.

Garry gazed urgently around the room for anything he could use to defend himself, having not have entered with anything in his hands. "Clearly not here" he answered bravely, "Besides, I couldn't care less about her or her whereabouts."

One of them laughed, a high pitch giggle that sent shivers down Lily's spine. "He's lying" spoke the person, a voice in which Lily was sure she had heard somewhere before. "Look at the way he came in here to her rescue"

Lily watched as the three figures drew what must have been their wands from their pockets. "We don't like being lied to" one of them informed Garry.

"I'm not going to tell you a thing!" he shouted in reply, not knowing what the people standing in front of him were capable of. They each pointed their wands at him and all screamed in unison one of the worst unforgivable curses.

However before they had the chance to begin to torture her friend with magic, she ran over towards him, pulling him down to the ground and under the invisibility cloak. Instantly she motioned for him to be quiet as the three figures glanced around the room in confusion, "Where did he go?" shouted one of the figures after watching him disappear out of thin air.

"He's just gone!" replied the other, "As if like magic!"

"But he's a muggle" added the first, "He couldn't possibly have been able to escape that"

They were quickly silence by the third, who Lily would've assumed to be the leader of the group. The figured removed her hood to reveal a large head of curly hair, "She's here boys" she informed her accomplices, laughing once more.

"Come out, come out wherever you are!" she shouted, continuing to laugh along with herself, "We've been waiting for you Lily Evan's and finally you've come out to play"

Under the cloak, Lily motioned for Garry to stay hidden in one of the furthest corners of the room, squeezing his head she ducked out from under it and stood to face the intruders. Without any sort of warning, she shot off her best stunning spell hitting one of the men square in the chest. "Oh look here, Little Lily has finally come to join in our little game, so sad that I'll be her last" hissed the leader.

Within seconds they were dueling, Lily strongly fought of two of them as the other remained unconscious on the ground. She saw out of the corner of her eye as the two attempted to slowly move her into a corner and before she could react, her back met two walls. Lily faltered quickly and she was hit in the chest, screaming in pain her wand slide from her grasp as she crumbled to the ground.

"Now we'll be straight with you mudblood," hissed the male figure, standing over her figure,"Tell us what Dumbledore is planning and no one will get hurt."

She gasped for air as the earlier pain suddenly stopped and the spell that had been cast was lifted. "I don't know anything, I don't know what he's planning!" she retorted, finding herself quickly obeying and answering the two in front of her.

"You're lying!" shouted the female leader, and Lily was met by another one of her Cruciatus Curses.

Blood began to drip down her nose and she could taste in within her mouth. "I don't know, I really don't know" Lily muttered weakly, desperately trying to find her wand on the ground before she was hit again.

"Liar!" the female shouted again, hitting her for the third time with the unforgivable curse. "The filthy mudblood!"

She felt herself begin to feel extremely dizzy, and just when she thought that there would be no end, that she would never live to see any of their faces ever again she felt the familiar carvings on her wand lying next to her. Before she could torture her further, Lily cast the strongest shield charm she could imagine causing both the figures to fly backwards.

She wiped the blood from her face and stood. Casting multiple curses until the only one that remained conscious was the leader of the group, "Oh little Lily," the witch began to say, "You have no idea what kind of plans we have for you. This is just the beginning"

Just before Lily could stun her, she aparated away leaving her two partners behind. She walked over to the unconscious bodies and pointed her wands directly at their temples, "Obliviate" she whispered under her breath, feeling the memories of her opponents as she erased them entirely.

"I don't understand" she heard Garry whisper from somewhere within the room, "What's going on?"

However, he never did get an answer because the moment he revealed himself she stunned him as well. Lily walked over to the man who had been so very kind to her and realized that there was no other option, they would find him and she couldn't risk it. She slowly raised her wand to his temple like she had done the two others.

"Goodbye, Garry" she said to his unconscious body, replacing and erasing every memory of her in his mind. The next morning he would discover a certain ambition to travel the world, and if Lily had preformed the spells correctly he would leave on a long journey and never return to this exact spot.

She gathered her belongings, restoring the apartment to it's original vacant state, and quickly fled the scene, aparating Garry into his apartment before she ran out into the streets below.

The cold wind blew strongly lifting the invisibility cloak every so slightly with each steps as she marched off down the street, she turned into a small alley way and frustrated pulled the cloak off of her head. She held it in her hands momentarily before folding it neatly and placing it in the small bag on her back.

Lily checked her watch before leaving the alley and continuing down the street, she now realized how much danger the people around her were in and decided to visit their homes and erase every memory of her. Then, before she would return to Hogwarts, she would go and see her sister. Even if Petunia hated her, she had the right to know what was going on, how much danger she was in.

* * *

><p>Lily arrived at Vernon Dudley's house just as the sun began to peak over the horizon. The house was bigger than she had remembered it being, it had a massive bay window that looked out onto a wonderful garden filled with hundreds of different coloured roses. It was a two floor house that looked from the outside to have at least four upstairs bedrooms. The whole house surrounded by a white picket fence that was beginning to chip off, Lily pushed open the small gate and walked up to the bright red door. She raised a small fist and knocked three times, praying that they wouldn't be too angry to be awoken at such the early hour.<p>

It was only until five minutes later, and Lily had knocked on the door for the fifth time when she realized that they weren't going to open it for her. The curtain in the living room had moved ever so slightly and it could have been her sister peeking out from the inside. Lily knocked one more time, and waited another few minutes before giving up. It seemed almost predictable that her attempts at warning her sister would end like this.

She sighed, mumbling to herself before frustratedly turning on the spot and heading down the first few steps. "Lily?" she heard someone ask from behind her, "What are you doing here?"

Lily turned around to see her sister standing in her nightgown on her front porch. Rubbing her eyes, Lily watched as her sister began to register who was standing in front of her. Looking past her short and blonde hair, she could tell her sister had figured out who it was.

Petunia's gaze turned instantly hard, "What do you want?" she demanded crossing her arms.

"I just wanted to talk with you," she answered, "At least, this last time.."

Her sister eyed the small luggage case next to Lily, "And what's that for?" Petunia retorted, raising her eyebrows. "You're not going to ask me to let you stay, because I can save a long conversation and tell you right now that it's not going to happen."

Lily smiled slightly, arguing with her sister felt so familiar she couldn't help but be a bit happy, "No, you don't have to worry about that, I just wanted to speak with you."

Petunia seemed to contemplate the idea, glancing around the house quickly, "Alright," she told her, turning around and walking towards the back of the house, "Come on in, Venon's still asleep. I'll make tea."

Lily nodded, leaving her luggage next to a small cupboard under the staircase and following her sister into the kitchen. They sat and waited together in silence, neither of which knowing what to say. It was slowly becoming overwhelming for Lily, "So," she blurted out, "How have you been?"

The kettle started to scream before her sister could offer a sarcastic comment and avoid her question. "You want tea?" her sister offered, grabbing two cups from a cupboard.

"Yeah," Lily agreed, "I take it-"

"I know how you take it," her sister cut in, "You had tea every morning for years, and you always took it the same way. No milk and no sugar, plain and boring."

Lily shrugged off the insult, and gladly took the tea from her sister. "It's really nice to see you," she stated, smiling into her cup, "I really didn't think I was ever going to see you again."

The two sisters made close to no conversation, each avoiding each others eyes as they sipped their tea. "It's boring around here," Petunia stated after a few long minutes of silence, "Sure, some days are wonderful, but it's lonely. Vernon's always at work, our neighbours are simply annoying. I don't like this neighbourhood."

"It seems nice" Lily pointed out,

Petunia shook her head, "It's not, instead it's filled with old couples that argue about the mail carrier, and loud barking noises from the dog a few doors down."

"Why don't you get a job?"

"I've applied for an office job," she said, shrugging slightly, "I doubt I'll hear back from them, I'm not qualified for the job, and Vernon's not too sure about me working anyway.."

Lily took the empty cup from her sister standing and walking over to the sink. "You can just leave them on the counter," Petunia said, biting on her nails, "I'll wash them later today,"

"Are you sure? I really don't mind" Lily replied,

"I'm sure, come sit." she assured her, "And could you grab the pack of cigarettes from the top drawer next to the sink?"

Lily stopped in her tracks, placing her hands on her hips, "You smoke!" she exclaimed, "Since when do you smoke?"

Petunia sighed, ushering her sister to bring them anyway, "I started a few months ago, with Vernon bringing home his stress from work, and me not having a job, or a future." she explained, "Also it might have something to do with this huge empty feeling I have inside me, after mom and dad passed it appeared and it only goes away when I.. well you know.. smoke.."

Lily raised her eyebrows, retaking her seat as her sister lit a cigarette. "Don't look at me like that" Petunia countered, "I rarely smoke, just sometimes."

"You already know my opinion about the disgusting habit, so I won't bore you with it," she pointed out, watching her sister taking long drags. As if she had been in a dream state, Lily suddenly felt herself wake up and remembered the real reason to why she showed up on her sister's door step.

"Petunia, if you hate the neighbourhood why don't you try moving?" she advised, "A new house could be a good change,"

"Vernon is really attached to this house," Petunia countered, "I just couldn't make him part with it. I don't expect you to understand, when you find someone you'll realize that the things that are important to them, become important to you."

"I know what you mean.." Lily began, however her sister cut her off.

She smiled, "Have you met someone?" Petunia demanded, leaning forward.

Lily shrugged, "Not really," she admitted, "Well, kind of.. I'm not really sure.."

Her sister smirked in reply, taking another long drag, "What's that look for?" Lily grumbled, "I don't like it"

"It's nothing really," she replied, however before she could explain further there was a distinct noise from the room above them. Quickly, upon hearing it, Petunia extinguished her cigarette and stood, crossing over and opening the window, "I think you'd better go, and take these with you" she stated, putting the cigarettes in her hand.

Lily nodded in agreement, looking with disgust down at the box in her hands, however refusing to argue knowing that if Vernon was awake, she didn't want to be around, "Alright" she agreed, following her sister back down the corridor towards the door, "But Petunia, there's something important I really have to tell you.."

"Really Lily" she interrupted, "You have to go, if he finds out you've been here.."

She put a hand on her sister's shoulder, "This can't wait," Lily pleaded, "It's extremely important."

Petunia nodded, ushering Lily out the half open door, however the noise sounded again and it the information didn't seem as important to Petunia than getting her sister out of that house. "Merry Christmas, Lily" she whispered, closing the door.

"You're in danger" Lily cried out before it closed, watching as her sister opened it ever so slightly, a sign for Lily to go on, "There's a war going on in the wizarding world and I'm being targeted. They would do anything to get to me, which means they might come to you first."

"Stop with this nonsense" she sputtered in reply,

"Just be careful" Lily reiterated, "You're in danger because of me, and I can't let anything happen to you."

"I'll be fine" Petunia assured her, smiling at her sister, "But you be careful alright, don't you dare go and do something stupid."

Lily nodded, proceeding down the path, "I won't" she promised her sister, whispering her goodbye just as she closed the door.

As she continued down the street, she didn't feel accomplished like she had hoped. The feelings of guilt and upset still remained in the pit of her stomach, and suddenly seemed all more clear to her. She had suppressed up until her sister had mentioned having the same feeling. It was in that moment that she realized she had been away for too long.

Still holding the cigarettes in her hand, she began to wonder whether they helped with the feeling she was not yet ready to face. She realized she wasn't going to be able to do this by herself, she needed her friends back, but maybe that wasn't enough. Without even realizing what she was doing she took a cigarette out of the small box, and using her wand, she lit the tip.

It was as if her problems were suddenly gone, no war, no worries. Just relief in that moment. Smiling to herself Lily shrunk the trunk she dragged behind her enough to fit into her pocket, and continued down the street in the direction of the park she had always gone to as a child. Smiling to herself, she stowed her hands in her pockets, feeling uplifted. One more stop and that was that, Lily was going back to Hogwarts.


	23. Chapter 23

_**Sunday, January 2nd**_

The hole, like her sister had promised, was gone. Although, as an unfortunate side effect, so was at least half the pack of cigarettes that her sister had shoved into her hands as she rushed her out her door. Gone; just like she had been for nearly two months. But she was back now, she argued, staring up at the snow-covered Hogwarts grounds. She shoved the pack of cigarettes in her coat pocket and with all her force, pushed the Hogwarts gates open.

The grounds seemed foreign, as if she hadn't been there in years when in turn, it hadn't actually been that long. With determination, she trudged up through the snow towards the castle doors. The edge of the Black Lake was frozen enough for her to stand on, which she did in fact do, only lingering for a second before continuing on. It was a beautiful sight in the winter, she particularly loved staring out at the Black Lake, watching as it went on forever.

The Quidditch pitch looked odd to Lily, it being completely deserted and she couldn't help but wonder how the Gryffindor team had done in her absence. She imaged James, Marlene and Sirius delaying practices and not playing to the best of their ability in the game, she imaged the Gryffindor team losing and the deadly quiet common room that followed. The idea that she had most likely worried them so much that the entire house was paying for it. Overwhelmed with guilt, she felt the hole in her chest again start to form and she reached for box in her coat pocket, but deciding against lighting a cigarette.

What would people say? What would she tell them?

The Head girl had suddenly disapeared and was now back, with no explanation, no good reason to have left. _You had a good reason, _Lily argued with herself, as the main doors grew closer. _You're parents had just been murdered and your sister was threatening to throw everything that they owned away. You had to sell their house, see to their belongings, most of which now lay in the bottom of her suitcase having been shrunk to fit inside. _But she couldn't explain that to everyone, not yet anyway.

Arriving at the main entrance, Lily pushed open the doors with all her force, slipping into the warmth. A smile grew on her face, and for a split second all her worries and fears were gone, the familiar Hogwarts feeling filling her up inside.

Her smiled faded when all her previous feelings came rushing back, this feeling of wanting and security didn't exsist in the real world. She feel asleep terrified every night and woke up just the same, her apartment had not been inviting but dirty and disgusting. She hated the Hogwarts for making her feel so happy, when everything outside of it's walls was falling to pieces. Inside, there was no war or death, there was no sadness or anger, but it was a lie. Hogwarts was just there to sheild us from the horrors beyond the grounds, the murder and torture, the death of innocent people.

The hole was back now, and bigger than ever before.

It was all a lie.

* * *

><p><em>Nearly 24 hours before<em>

Professor McGonagall seated herself in Dumbledore's office, patentially waiting for him to return from a meeting with a few of the Order members, conserning the new changes that would have to be put in place now that it had been weeks since they had last seen Lily Evan's.

Upon his return, the Headmaster quickly informed her of the discussion from the meeting and waited in silence as she digested the different opinions that had been given that morning. He had thought most of them to be highly too pessimistic for his liking, but had considered them along with the others.

However, Albus still felt unsatified, as no one seemed to offer an answer to the question they were all asking. After what seemed like an appropriate amount of time, he spoke again, "Now, with all of that in mind," he began, "What is your opinion on the matter? Do you agree with the majority, should we be accepting the worst? Or hoping for the best?"

"Albus" Professor McGonagall muttered, her eyes glistening with tears, "I think it's time that we stop lying to ourselves. This has gone on long enough, and if it was anyone else.."

He nodded along with her, deep in thought, "I have full confidence in her abilities, it is for that reason I have remained so hopeful. I do not doubt she is still alive" he responded with a steady tone

"The Order can't find her" Minerva replied, "They've been looking for weeks, and they have gotten no where. The group is made up of some of the most brilliant minds that have ever walked these halls, if she was still out there, they would've found her."

The Headmaster sat, peering at her over top of his half-moon spekticals, as she continued to speak, "I think we should go about telling her friends, that it is most likely she has been-" the words caught in her throat, "that she might be-"

After a deep breath, Professor McGonagall found her voice, "that it is as we feared,"

"I will talk to Mr. Potter this evening, and I will discuss the situation at hand with him before we come to any rash decisions," Albus informed her, "As Head boy and as a dear friend to Ms. Evans, I would appriciate what he has to say,"

"He's just a boy" she retorted, "You can't go putting this on him! Albus, it would distroy him."

"I have no intention of mentioning your suspicsions, as you said, telling him such a thing would in fact distroy him. I'm mearly wondering about his imput, how he thinks she's holding up, whether or not he feels the same way as you do, Minerva."

"Alright" she agreed, standing from her chair and making her way out of the office. She really did hope that she was wrong, that her predictions were incorrect. She prayed that Lily Evans would come back to Hogwarts.

* * *

><p>James, Sirius and Remus trudged through the snow from the Hogwarts gates to the castle doors, pushing them open so they could slip inside into the warm air of the castle. They brushed the snow off their clothing, dropping their bags to the ground.<p>

"Why we thought it was a good idea to walk back up to the castle, I do not know," admitted James, pulling out his wand and casting a warming charm on his feet.

"I wasn't that bad" countered Remus, "You're just overracting, Prongs"

Sirius agreed, pulling out their map from inside his bag, muttering about finding Marlene. However before he could even find her footprints, they heard a familiar voice sound behind them,

"Oh thank Merlin" they heard Marlene exclaim, running over towards them, as Sirius quickly returned the map to his bag,"You didn't tell me you were coming back early!"

Sirius pulled her into a hug, "We wanted it to be a surprise," he told her, pulling back to allow her to be hugged by both James and Remus. "Happy new year, by the way"

"Oh you as well," she replied, positively extatic to see them, "I trust you had a wonderful break? Being away from here must have been nice, how's the outside world been? Have you three been reading the profit?"

They all stared at her in bewilderment, as she continued to question them, not waiting for a response. "Marlene" Remus interrupted, "What's gotten into you? What's with the interrogation?"

She sighed, taking a few deep breaths, "I've been alone too long, I guess. The quiet of an empty Hogwarts starts to really eat away at you when you experience it for too long,"

"Come on Marlene," James started, sligging his small bag over his shoulder once more and making his way towards Gryffindor tower, the others following in his footsteps, "tI couldn't have been that bad without us,"

She shook her head, linking her own arm through Sirius' as they walked, "It was torture, everyone went home a few days after and I was left alone with a few Hufflepuffs. It was that bad."

"Have you had any word from-" started Remus, however she silenced him with the shake of her head.

"Dumbledore and McGonagall have called me into their offices to talk multiple times, wanting to know everything." she replied, "But sadly, I haven't heard from her at all, I recon that they're getting a bit worried,"

The three of them nodded along with her as she continued to speak, "Surely she's alright though, I personally don't think we have anything to be worrying about. She's brilliant, there's not a doubt in my mind.."

Marlene lowered her voice, "They think that she's been taken by-" she looked around caustiously before continuing, "By Deatheater's, they think that she's being tortured. They think that they killed her parents to get to her, because she has something that they want.."

"Gillyweed," James said to the portrait, as they arrived at the entrance, and it swung open, revealing a deserted common room.

They all filled up the few couches in front of the fire place, "What does Lily have that they want?" hissed James, angrily running a hand through his hair, "What do they want from her?"

"Prongs" Sirius said forcully, so that he could not argue, "They haven't captured her, she's fine."

"How do you know?" James demanded, "You haven't heard from her, for all we know-"

Marlene cut him off, "It really doesn't matter what we know, Dumbledore is most likely going to call you three into his office. He's definitely going to want to speak with you," she stated, motioning to James "You may as well make your way over there now, save him the trouble of tracking you down,"

James nodded, getting to his feet, "I've got to talk to him about some things as well. You two coming?" he asked, looking over at Sirius and Remus.

"I suppose he'll probably just want to talk with you alone," Remus mused, "It seems likely he'll want your opinion since your Head boy. I doubt he even wants to talk to Padfoot and I,"

The Head boy shrugged in reply, "Suit yourselves," he agreed, walking over towards the portrait hole and disapearing into the corridor.

The three of them made sure that the portrait had closed shut before continuing, "Alright" Remus said, turning to Sirius, "Spill it,"

The boy in question raised his eyebrows, "Why, whatever are you talking about Lupin?" he asked, innocently.

"Tell us what you know about James," Marlene cut in, smirking slightly, "You've been dropping hints about something in all of your messages, what's going on?"

Sirius smiled, leaning in closer towards Remus and Marlene, lowering his voice, "He's going to tell her" Sirius whispered, happy to finally get the secret off his chest,"The next time he sees her, James is going to tell Lily,"

* * *

><p>"Ah, Mr. Potter" started the Headmaster, "I was beginning to wonder when you would come and see me. I trust you had a good holiday?"<p>

James nodded his head, approaching the desk and sitting down in the chair opposite to Dumbledore, "I did, however I'm guessing that my holidays aren't the reason you've wished to speak with me," he replied, a serious look on his face.

Dumbledore chuckled at the Head boy, although quickly grew sober, "As much as I would like you to tell me about the time you spent with your parents and Mr. Black. You were right when you said there is something more important I wish to speak with you about," he began, "Ms. Evan's has been gone nearly two months, without any communications to any of her friends, or to any one else for that matter."

James agreed, though said nothing, ushering his Headmater to continue, "Professor McGonagall has already expressed to me her opinion on this matter, as well as other teachers and Auror's involved. I have taken into consideration all their ideas and opinions, although I find that the most important opinion is that of the people closest to her"

He looked at James over top of his halfmoon spekticals, rather expectantly, "You want my opinion?" James asked, slightly shocked, "Out of all people, you want mine?"

The Headmaster nodded, "Not just yours, but those of Mr. Black, Mr. Lupin, Ms. MacDonald, Ms. McKinnon, and Mr. Pettigrew" he further explained, "Although above all, yours. Over the years you have been closest with Ms. Evans, and as Headboy, I appreciate what you have to say."

At first, the Head boy had been hesitant, and the two men sat in silence. James fought with his inner self, unable to come to a decision of confessing what he was truly thinking to Dumbledore. He had said his opinion was important, however it seemed highly unlikely that he would want to hear what he has to say. His thoughts on the subject, were not good ones, they were not those of worry or upset. Finally, he cleared his throat, realizing that he should tell someone or else he might express these feelings at random and really hurt someone.

"I think she's an idiot" James stated bluntly, finally admitting what he had been thinking for the past few months, "Running off like that, abandonning her friends and the safety of Hogwarts. She's put herself in so much danger, and although I can't relate to what's happened to her and my opinion may be a little biased, she's put herself in danger because she's too afraid to face the truth. To accept that she needs us to help her, she's running away from reality because she's too much of a coward to face it herself."

"She's put us all through so much, she's worried us so much that we can't focus on anything but her. At one point we were fighting because it seemed as if no one was putting in any sort of effort to get her back! It was stupid for her to run away, we could've helped her and kept her safe. If I weren't so terribly worried, Headmaster, I would be furious with her. She's irresponsible, inconsiderate, and completely mad."

"And I know what people are going to say, I know what other's are thinking, it's what we, as her friends, dare not too." James continued, and Dumbledore listened without offering any sort of reaction. "They think that she's been taken, or worse, that she's dead. Most of us can't even bring ourselves to say it! We refuse to believe it."

"I know she's fine," James concluded, "And I know what I've said is horrible, really terribly mean. Her parents were murdered, and she blames herself for it. I refuse to pitty her, because I've seen her at her worst, when it looked like her entire world was crumbling down around her, she still had her head held high and fought harder than ever. I know she's brilliant, and I know she's still alive and safe. Please understand when I say, that the next time I see her, all this anger and resentment will be gone because I will be so overjoyed to see her."

Silence hung in the air, as the two men digested what had just been confessed.

"Mr. Potter, I want you to know that I think it's completely normal for you to be angry with her. She's deserted you, leaving you with worry and responsibility. However, I would advise you not to share this opinion of yours because others are not going to be as understanding. Others will not be able to see, that you are more frustrated with the fact that you have not been able to do anything to help her, rather than angry with Ms. Evans for being, as you put it, cowardly." The Headmater told him, sitting up in his chair and leaning over his desk towards James, "I am grateful for having heard your opinion, if there is nothing else you wish to disguss, you may be on your way."

James wanted to ask about what he was doing to find her, whether they had stopped looking, whether they had any firm evidence that she was alive or dead. He did not however, "I was just wondering, Professor, if, until Lily's return, Remus could help me complete some of my responsibilties as Headboy. And I know I don't have to ask you for permission, but because of the circumstances.."

Dumbledore smiled at him, "Of course," he replied, "Do whatever it is you feel necessary,"

James nodded, retreating towards the door and closing it in the hall. The things he had just confessed came rushing back to him, now in the silence of the corridor. After having kept his opinions to himself for months, he thought it would feel good to get things off his chest, he thought he would feel better and unburdened.

Sighing James realized this wasn't the case, now having admitted it, he just feels guilty and unloyal._  
><em>

* * *

><p>Professor McGonagall couldn't imagine James Potter seated in front of Albus, completely furious with Lily Evans. She had expected him to be upset and worried, demanding all sorts of questions about their search for the Head girl. She tried to piece together the information, unable to see things from his perspective.<p>

And through all his aingst, Albus had informed her that he had remained hopefull, that James Potter had been absolutely sure that Lily Evans was alive and well. However, she couldn't help but believe that he had been wrong, much like he had claimed Ms. Evans was doing, he was lying to himself, unable to face the truth of reality.

She imagined James Potter along with his friends mourning for her, the image of having to relay the information to them. Knowing deep down inside that because she would have to tell them that they had no found proof, and because of that they would never truly believe her.

They had not been able to find Lily Evan's in weeks, only finding a destroyed apartment, and a small trace of magic that someone had wiped the memory of her neighbour to prevent him from ever remembering her again. She was gone, dead or captured. They didn't have enough information about the rising group of so-called Death Eaters to be able to track the place where they would be keeping her. She was as good as gone.

She shook her head in disbelief, unable to grasp her sense of pessimism. She was pulled from her musings when she heard a pair of footsteps approached her door and someone softly knocked on the other side. She had expected it to be either a fellow professor, or at worst one of Lily's closest friends demanding her to tell them any information she had. Although when she beckoned the person to enter she had almost cried in relief.

"Professor" Lily stated, her change in appearance catching her head of house off guard, "I need to speak with you about changing my career path"

She sat in shock as her student sat down in the chair before her as if she hadn't been missing for months. "Ms. Evan's don't you think it would be a better idea for us to talk about where you've been?" the professor asked, "Or better yet, why don't we go up to Professor Dumbledore's office?"

"I'm here to talk about changing my career path," Lily repeated, as if not having heard McGonagall. "I hardly think that's a matter that would concern Professor Dumbledore."

The elder woman shook her head in disbelief, "I don't think I understand Ms. Evan's. You've spent the majority of the season in hiding, completely undetectable, but now you've returned and simply wish to speak to me about your career path?" she stated, looking at her over top of her glasses.

"Yes" Lily told her, "That is exactly right"

McGonagall sighed knowing that she was going to get no information out of Lily Evan's at that time. Waving her wand in the air, she summoned the multiple different brochures she used when helping the Gryffindor fifth years with their career decision. "Now Ms. Evan's I'm more than happy to help you figure things out" she began, "You have previously told me that you would like to become a Healer, although based on this meeting I'm assuming you're second guessing this idea?"

Lily smiled, pushing her blond hair back out of her face, "You guess correctly, Professor"

"Alright" she agreed, pulling out the previous notes she had made at Lily's first career ideas, "What is it you would like to do after Hogwarts, if you no longer wish to become a Healer?"

With the utter most confidence she took a deep breath and plainly stated, "I want to be an Auror"

Her professors quill froze on the page beside her, and she sighed deeply. The Head of House took off her glasses and looked at the troubled teenager in front of her in the eyes, "I'm not sure if that's the right decision" she began, "You'd need top grades for that career path. They ask for a minimum of five NEWTS, and nothing under 'Exceeds Expectations'. You are way behind the other NEWTS classes you would need to take, having been gone for the past few months. You would also be required to undergo a series of character and aptitude tests at the Auror Office. It's a difficult path, they only accept the best Ms. Evan's."

"I am the best" Lily told her, "I have top grades in all my classes, and I plan to achieve way more than five NEWTS all 'Outstanding'. As for the character and aptitude tests, I promise you I will not have any difficulty what-so-ever. I am going to be an Auror, I promise you that, Professor."

She sighed, realizing that she was fighting a battle she was surely going to lose. "I have the greatest confidence in you, Ms. Evan's" she told her, "But I wish for you to think about this before you go making any big decisions."

"I'm going to become an Auror, I am sure of this decision" Lily said, standing from the chair and heading towards the door. "I will need to meet with you soon about a few Head Duties. As well as, I'm sure you're going to need a few days to inform my other teachers of my switch."

"Two days should give me enough time," the Professor told her, "I will see you on tuesday"

"And I'm going to have to change your timetable to place you into the classes that focus more on what you would need to learn to become an Auror" Professor McGonagall continued, "Although, I was hoping that because I'm doing something for you then you could do something for me."

Lily nodded, urging her to continue, "Please meet with Dumbledore and I later this afternoon. That gives you time to head to bed and then you can meet with us during your lunch."

"You read my mind Professor," she replied, "Thank you for your help,"

She pulled open the door, her back to her professor, "Welcome back, Ms. Evan's" she added as an after thought, "Hogwarts has missed you while you've been gone"

The sun was just beginning to fill the dark Hogwarts castle as Lily walked its familiar halls. She only assumed that her head of house would quickly tell Dumbledore and the other teachers of her return. She had fooled them, and they were so curious about how. She chuckled to herself, knowing that her future employers were the ones who she had baffled.

Suddenly, Lily felt herself longing to sleep in the comfort of the Hogwarts castle, just like her Professor had assumed. She turned down the corridor towards the library, in search of a secret passage way that Remus had once showed her that brought her straight to the corridor around the corner from her dormitory. Although as she passed, she glanced in through the glass doors and in the darkness of the room saw a small light on.

She entered, observing the deserted room and continued to the back. She spotted the cause of the light, seated at her usual table having fallen asleep after a long night she assumed, was Remus Lupin. Lily grabbed one of the nearest transfiguration textbooks off a shelf and sat down across from the sleeping boy, who awoke suddenly at the slightest movement of the table he had been resting on.

"Lily?" Remus asked, rubbing his eyes to make sure it was actually her, "Lily!"

She shushed him, "Keep your voice down" Lily hissed in a joking tone, pointing to her textbook, "Some of us are actually trying to work"

"But.. You're here, you haven't been here in months!" he retorted, still in shock, "And.. You're hair! I'm dreaming, I must be dreaming."

She had forgotten her hair, feeling slightly embarrassed she pulled out her wand and quickly transfigured it back to its normal deep red and long length.

She laughed as he continued to stare at her in complete shock, realizing that with his lack of sleep, this situation was probably too much for him to handle. "I'll explain everything later, but right now let's just get you to bed," she replied, standing and extending her hand to him.

"We've been so worried," he began to explain, "All of us, we haven't slept, or ate, we've been falling behind in school, certainly Quidditch.."

Lily nodded along as he continued to chatter on to her, his lack the main cause of his lack of knowledge, "Come on" she said, pulling him up out of his chair.

He heartledly agreed, snaking his arm around her waist and pulling her in close to his side. They walked out of the library, and he lead her through the passage that opened up just down the hall from the portrait hole to the Gryffindor common room.

"I've missed you so much" he retold her, as they walked into the common room and up the staircase towards the dormitory he shared with the three other Marauders. "We've been miserable without you,"

Remus opened the door to reveal his three sleeping mates, "I'm actually surprised they're asleep," he told Lily, "They rarely ever sleep these days, too busy up worrying about the girl they care so much about. Prongs doesn't even go into the Head's common room anymore, he has been sleeping in his bed here ever since we return after Christmas,"

She smiled, feeling even more guilty as he continued to tell her about the horrible things she had put them through, "When is everyone supposed to be coming back from Holidays?" Lily asked, watching as Remus fell into bed,

"Sometime next week," he mumbled, pulling the curtains of his bed slightly closed. "I'm so glad to have you here, safe." he told her, smiling into his pillow. Lily made no reply, realizing that he probably wouldn't have heard it anyway, for moments after lying down, he had fallen into a deep sleep.

Lily nodded, turning back towards the door, her hand on the door nob. However stopped short and turned around, walking over towards the sleeping James. He looked tired, and she couldn't help but feel guilty for making him worry. She missed his sarcastic comments, his protective tone, she missed him much more than she realized she had.

In that moment she had a sudden erge to pull his blankets aside and slipped into the empty space next to him. He would surely wake up at the presence of another person in his bed, and would pull her close to him once he realized she was safe. For the first time in a long time, she would feel it as well, and maybe she would finally be able to get to sleep.

However, like the past few nights, the idea of what lay behind her close eyes frightened her so much that she chose to avoid sleep entirely. She turned towards the door, and slipped out into the dimly lit hall. Slowly making her way back towards the Head's tower, santering through the hallways and fully apprichating her return to Hogwarts.

Instantly, she dove into her work, _there were plenty of things she had to do before she could even think about resting, _Lily reasoned with herself. Pulling out dust covered text books and Head duty sheets that needed to be filled out, that James had rightfully neglected while she had been away. As the night came to an end, and morning rolled around the corner, Lily had completely forgotten about sleep, instead using a quick charm to overide her feelings of exhaust.


	24. Chapter 24

_**Monday, January 10th **_

James had awoken at the very early hours of the morning, and paraded down to the Quidditch pitch to try out a few plays before he began schedueling partices. The weather had been rough, and he could only stay out in the snow for a short amount of time before reasoning that he wouldn't be much help to anyone if he injured himself. He then descided, after nearly forty-five minutes of different manuvers and laps around the pitch, to retreat into the warmth of the castle.

The others were still sleeping when he entered the dormitory, and after checking his watch he chose not to wake them until after he had showered, noticing that they still would have enough time to make breakfast if he let them sleep a little while longer. He grabbed his slacks and his Hogwarts jumper, and hopped into the shower.

He stood under the warmth of the water, which felt nice against his frozen feet and hands. He quickly dressed and towel dried his hair, messing it up more than it usually is.

"Were you outside again this morning?" demanded Sirius, who sat, fully dressed on his bed, transfiguring Peter's hair repeatedly changing it's colour.

James laughed as his best mate turned Remus' hair bright pink, "Yeah," he stated, placing his Quidditch gear under his bed, "It's not that cold, you should join me,"

Sirius made a face, "I think I'd rather not," he answered, returning Remus' hair to it's normal colour and shoving his wand into his pocket, "It's not like I need the practice anyway.."

"Careful Black" James warned, "If you keep that up I'll have you doing laps next practice,"

His best mate laughed in reply, muttering under his breath that James would never do such a thing. However before either could say a word, they were interrupted by a rather displeased Marauder.

"Would you two shut up!" hissed Remus, burring his head into his pillow, "Just because you two love morning, doesn't mean everyone else does."

"Oh come on!" shouted James, "Everyone has to love the morning! It's the best time of the day,"

Sirius was quick to agree, "Yeah! There's breakfast, and bedhead!"

"And morning breath and Quidditch practices!" added James, smirking at Sirius.

"No, Prongs" the Marauder complained in reply, "Please, no morning Quidditch practices, I hate those."

Remus rolled into a sitting position, glaring at his two best mates as they continued to argue about something that he assumed wasn't worth his time. However, upon seeing him awake, the other two Marauder's seized their conversation.

"Woah!" cried Sirius, "Moony, you look absolutely exhausted, what time did you get in last night?"

"Yeah" agreed James, trying to remember the events of the previous night, "Last time we talked I think you said you were going to the library,"

"Which I really wish was a clever lie so you wouldn't have to tell us that you were meeting up with a girl, because honestly Moony, it's about time you got back to your own mischief." Sirius stated, winking at his best mate, who continued to glare at him.

Remus rolled his eyes, "Please" he begged, "Stop talking,"

"I mean, there are plenty of interested birds around Hogwarts" Sirius continued, "I've heard from multiple different ones that they find you mysterious, and the fact that you're smart.."

"Yeah" James agreed, grabbing his quaffle off the ground and tossing it up in the air, "Mysterious is always a good characteristic,"

"Stop" Remus interrupted, "I was in the library, it wasn't a clever lie. I am boring, definitely not mysterious. No one's interested, and I'm not looking. After what happened the last time, I think I've just come to the conclusion that I'm going to be alone forever."

"Oh come on" Sirius shouted, watching as his fellow Marauder got to his feet and made his way over towads the washroom, "Don't say that Moony, there are plenty of needy and desperate birds just waiting for you!"

James snorted, "That sounds like an advertisment for a cheap dating website," he muttered, unable to contain his laughter,"_Plenty of needy and desperate birds just waiting for you!_"

Suddenly, from out of nowhere, Remus turned towards his mates, scratching his head, "I think I'm forgetting something," he told them, "But I just can't put my finger on it,"

"It's okay Moony," countered Sirius, smirking at him, "I don't remember half the girls names that I've snogged, forgetting one isn't the end of the world"

In reply, Remus marched into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him, muttering about his inability to have an actual conversation with his roomates.

"Oh come on, Moony!" he continued, getting to his feet and making his way over towards the closed door, "You know I was only kidding, I'll be serious-"

He was cut off when he tripped over Remus' discarded school bag, lying at the end of Peter's bed, which he had not seen. "For the sake of Merlin!" he shouted through the door, picking up the bag and throwing it across the room onto Remus' bed. "Would it kill you to put your school bag away, or at least somewhere that I won't kill myself tripping over it!"

Moments later, Remus appeared in the doorway, tooth brush in his mouth, staring wide-eyed at his two best mates. "What is it?" inquired James, upon spotting his face, "What's with that look?"

He quickly turned around and spat into the sink, "I remembered" he answered, depositing his tooth brush on the counter, "I remember what I couldn't remember!"

The two gazed at him with confused looks on their faces, ushering Remus to further explain, "Lily!" he replied, running over towards James' bedside table and grabbing the map. He quickly located her dot, heading towards the Headmaster's office, "She's back!"

He pointed at her dot and ran out of the dormitory, leaving his two mates in his dust.

It took both Sirius and James a few seconds to recover before sprinting out of the dormitory after Remus, catching up to him very quickly, the three of them took the fastest way possible towards her.

* * *

><p>Lily walked along the corridor, having showered and now dressed in her Hogwarts uniform, she struggled to hold the multiple pieces of parchment she had finished filling out over the course of that morning, having not slept at all.<p>

She had spent the night doing the homework she had missed, and catching up on all her magic, learning six new spells and seven new charms all within six hours. Lily had mapped out exactly how she was going to spend her day. After going to see Dumbledore, she would return to Professor McGonagall's office and drop off all the Head's documents she had filled out, so she could read over them before their meeting again on tuesday.

She quickly turned the corner and muttered the password to the gargole, who looked quite surprised to see her. Although, even if he had not been expecting her, Dumbledore had, and the gargole poliety informed her that he was awaiting her arrival.

Lily thanked him and climbed the staircase, hearing somewhere far off in the distance someone calling her name, however as she turned around, the gargole was set back in place and she stared at a brick wall. She smiled to herself, and continued up the stairs, arriving at the Headmaster's office. She raised a small fist and knocked on the door.

"Come in" Professor Dumbledore told her from the opposite side of the door, and upon seeing her, his smile grew big and he looked slightly relieved. "Ms. Evan's," he began, "I was told that you had returned, I'm sure your friends are very happy to see you. Hogwarts has deeply missed their Head Girl over the past few weeks,"

She smiled in reply, taking the chair opposite to her Headmaster's desk, "I haven't actually gotten a chance to see my friends," she replied, "I arrived very early this morning, and we busy filling out this paperwork," Lily said, motioning to the stack she held in her hands.

"Yes, yes" he agreed, "I should have assumed you'd be on task of catching up as soon as you got back. Now, give all that paperwork to me, I'll go over it and then get back to you and Mr. Potter"

"We, however" Dumbledore continued, "Have some very serious matters to speak about, Ms. Evan's. Now, I already know that you've refused to tell Professor McGonagall about the past few weeks, but I had rather hoped you would tell me."

Lily nodded, "I have every intention of telling you about the events of the past month," she agreed, although before she could continue, there was another knock at the door.

The Headmaster, waved his wand and unlocked the door, beckoning them to enter.

Lily had been half expecting to see her friends, having decided that they couldn't wait to see her and gotten passed to gargole. The man that entered the room, Lily did not recognize. He wasn't a teacher, or any of the ministry members that had previously visited Hogwarts.

He was a tall man, not overweight but fit, he had jet black messy and disorganised hair, and eyes that looked all too familiar to her. "We got the message-" he attempted to say, however stopped abruptely upon seeing Lily seated in the office. "Oh."

"I'm sorry to interrupted," he began, backing out of the office, "We can talk later, Albus"

The Headmaster smiled his reply, although instead of letting him leave, he waved his wand and congured another chair. "Please, sit" he told the strange man, and he complied. "Lily Evan's, this is Harold Potter"

She stared at him, slightly shocked at the name, when it suddenly became clear to her. The messy hair, the eyes, the tall figure, this was James' father. Lily faltered slightly before addressing him, "It's very lovely to meet you, Mr. Potter" she said to him, putting on a smile.

He leaded forward in his chair, moving closer as if to inspect that she was really there. "Oh, and it's absolutely wonderful to meet you!" he exclaimed in reply, returning her smile, "But please, call me Harold."

"Lily," The headmaster interrupted, "Harold Potter, has been one of the main Auror's looking for you, and whether you know it or not, no one could find you."

She tried to hide her smirk, "I know" she whispered, barely audible.

"Well of course you knew," Harold added, "You had more then ten of the best witches and wizards looking for you, and you left no trace, you were invisible, to us and everyone else. It's completely austonishing, it's unbelievable what you've done."

"Harold," Dumbledore said, "Why don't we let Ms. Evan's explain what she has been up to the last few weeks, after you lost track of her."

"That is," Harold stated, before she could start, "If you don't mind me hearing this as well, I can go and leave you with Albus, if you prefer to speak alone."

Lily shook her head, something about Harold Potter made him very likable, and she trusted him instantaniously. "You can stay, if you'd like." she told him, and the two men before her urged her to begin, "Well, it all started when I realized that I was being followed, and at that time I didn't know who it was, so I reasoned that I should go into hiding..."

* * *

><p>"I wonder what's taking them so long.." demanded James, pacing impatiently in the corridor, a little way down from the gargole. "She's been in there nearly an hour,"<p>

"Prongs" Remus started, seated up against a wall next to Sirius, "You know that this is going to take long. It's Dumbledore, they're going to what to know every detail, every little thing, no matter it's significance."

"Did you guys see the face of the man that followed her up there?" Sirius asked, glacing down towards the entrance to the Headmaster's office, "I mean, he must be important, since he's still up there now..."

The two boys shrugged their shoulder's in reply. "Do you think she's going to tell us what happened?" Remus asked a few minutes later, as James continued to pace up and down the hall. "I mean, she might not."

"Why wouldn't she?" James questioned, "We're her friends, she tells us everything."

Both Sirius and Remus looked skeptical, "It could be really bad," replied Remus, "So bad that maybe not telling us would be the better thing to do."

"I think I'm going to go get Marlene," interrupted Sirius, getting to his feet, "I doubt she knows that Lily's back, and I'm sure she'd want me to tell her,"

The other two nodded in agreement, watching him retreat down the hall way towards the Gryffindor tower. Sighing, James slide down the wall, into the spot his best mate had previously sat.

Remus smirked, "You know she's safe now, Prongs" he said, "You don't need to worry anymore,"

James ran a hand through his hair, messing it up even more, "I know. I just don't remember what it feels like not to be worried, and I can't get over it until I've actually seen her."

Remus nodded, "This isn't a dream," he assured him, "She's actually here, she's safe"

He made no reply, and the two boys sat in silence, waiting patiently for Lily to exit the Headmaster's office, or for Sirius to return with Marlene. Although each boy was hoping for the former.

* * *

><p>"Okay" continued Harold, as Lily rapped up the end of her story, "Now, I understand the memory wiping of your floormate, we would've done that anyway. Doing the same to the two death eater's that you stunned, was also a good idea. You were hiding in your apartment, and I understand, but Lily, what are you leaving out?"<p>

Dumbledore had remained silent throughout her entire tale, he had offered no facial reaction at all, and had listened intentally as she continued to talk to the two men. She had described every relationship, every time of day, and everything else with perfect detail. However, he too had noticed that she had left something out.

Lily, though, hung her head in shame, unable to look either man in the eye. They had tortured her, the spells had kept coming and everytime she closed her eyes she still saw them. The three figures looking over her, casting spell after spell, but most of all she remembers the pain.

"It'd be better if you didn't know," she replied, dropping her gaze to the floor.

The two men shared a look, and Harold sighed deeply. He picked up his chair and moved it closer towards her, as Dumbledore stood from his chair and moving around to the other side of his desk. Lily, however, would not meet either of their eyes.

"Lily" the headmaster began, but he faltered, unable to continue. Silence hung over the three of them, as they grew more and more worried of what had happened to her.

"The Headmaster and I have seen the bad in the world, we've seen how heartless it can be. Friends, and family have been taken from us right before our very eyes, Lily. We are not going to be judgemental, or objective, we are on your side no matter what happened, because we know you have done the right thing. We don't know what you had to endure, and we only imagine how hard it was, but if you tells us we can do everything in our power, which is a lot, to help you and keep you safe." Harold Potter promised her, "You're an extremely important girl, Lily Evans, more than you will ever know."

And after a few minutes, while the two men waited patentially, Lily finally spoke. The two men had to lean in very closely towards her, and then she said it, in a whisper.

And then there was a pause, the longest pause, as it seemed to go on forever. As Harold Potter had just told her, they had heard it all, experienced the worst and gotten through it. However, as her small voice eoched in the minds, they realized they had never had to deal with anything like this.

"All I remember is pain, and all I see when I close my eyes is them," Lily continued, paying no attention to the horrified looks on the two mens face's "And I don't know how to act, or how to be. I'm scared, and I don't want to hurt anymore,"

Harold Potter grabbed her hand and pulled Lily to her feet, pulling her in tightly, "They will never hurt you again," he swore to her, and his voice was so steady that she couldn't help but to believe him. "I, along with the rest of my team, will never let them hurt you ever again,"

"Harold" began the headmaster, "I think you had better go,"

Mr. Potter nodded his head, and slowly let go of Lily. "And Ms. Evans," continued Dumbledore, "I would like you to head directly up to the Hospital Wing, I have to take care of a few things, and then I'll be along."

She nodded her head, walking shamefully out of the room, "I'll walk along with you," added Harold over his shoulder, as Lily headed towards the door, "It's been a long time since I walked these halls, I think it's time for me to revisit them."

Lily agreed, and proceed down the stairs, mentioning that she would meet him at the bottom.

"It seems things are worse then we had previously assumed," said Albus, "You better tell the rest of the Order. We will all meet tonight and disguss this new information, it seems as if we need to reevaluate,"

"I will contact everyone," Harold promised the Headmaster, running a hand through his hair, much like his son does.

The Headmaster smiled, walking over towards where Harold was sure he kept his pensive, he pulled out his wand and put it to his temple. Slowly he guided his wand to the waters of the pensive and placed the small sliver strand into it, "You've always done wonders with teenagers," Dumbledore told him, "I, myself, have never been able to talk to them with such compassion and understanding,"

Harold chuckled in reply, "I've had years of practice," he confessed, "With that son of mine, and now Sirius. Well, I would hope I'd be good at leveling with them by now,"

Dumbledore nodded, although appeared to be lost in thought. Bidding his goodbyes, Harold left the Headmaster to his thoughts and followed Lily out of the office. He stopped ever so briefly on one of the steps before making his way into the hall, taking a few deep breaths to digest the information he had just been given.

To think of all the danger that they had put her in, he couldn't bare it, because it would seem as if the Death Eater's had been after only one thing. They wanted to know the secrets of the Order, and attack Lily Evans and her family, thinking that she would some how have a direct link to them, being a muggleborn, being close with the Potter's, being close to Dumbledore.

* * *

><p>Remus sighed as James began to pace once more, watching his best mate walking back and forth was making his dizzy. He briefly closed his eyes, wondering why it was taking Sirius so long to get Marlene, he had the map, it's not like he was having trouble finding her.<p>

In the back of his mind, he heard the familiar sound of the gargole that guarded Dumbledore's office moving. Slowly, he opened his eyes, and watched as James spun on one foot and ran down the corridor towards the staircase. His best mates face lit up, and without even seeing her, Remus knew that Lily had come into view, and suddenly he knew nothing else mattered in the world to his best mate.

For a minute Remus felt extremely out of place, as he watched Lily wrap her arms around James' neck and as his fellow Marauder picked the girl of his dreams off of her feet. They spun around in circles, and the two of them laughing in delight, finally seeing each other after two months.

"Okay," interrupted Remus, tapping James on the shoulder, as he put Lily back down. "I know you may be having a moment, but I really could care less,"

His mate understood, and let go of Lily. Remus, taking the opportunity, pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her. "Oh god," he whispered into her hair, "I've missed you so much, I'm so happy to see you again, back here, safe, with us."

The sound of the gargole caught both of the Marauder's attention, and they each turned towards the entrance to the headmaster's office. Remembering at the sight of the man, that another had entered the office shortly after Lily had.

James stared at the man, in shock, "Dad?" he questioned, "What are you-? Why? Did you-?"

Harold Potter, simply raised his eye brows in response, as his son continued to ramble on. "Come on, Ms. Evans," he said, placing his hand on her back and guiding her down the hall, "Let's head off then?"

She didn't reply, but made her way down the hall. "Wait, but!" shouted James, catching up to them, "Where are you going?"

"Dumbledore wanted Ms. Evans to go up to see Madame Pomfrey, and I'd offer to walk with her there before I head back to London," replied James' father, continuing down the hall way as the two Marauder's followed closely behind.

"Dad," James started, "You can go back to London, Remus and I can take her up to the Hospital Wing, it's no trouble for us,"

"It's not trouble for me either, son" he replied, turning down another hall,

"Really, though," continued James, "Just go back home,"

"James," his father answered, "This is nothing that concerns you, you can talk with Ms. Evans later today,"

"Harold," James countered, "Go on home to mum,"

"You know what," interrupted Lily, turning towards the men, slightly frustrated with them, "If you two are going to bicker the entire way, then I'd really much prefer going on my own."

"Lily," James said, taking a step towards her, "You've been gone for nearly two months, if you think that I'm going to just let you walk away-"

She sighed, running a hand through her hair, "If it worries you that much then Remus can come with me," she stated, linking arms with him, "I will catch up with you later, and won't you please send Marlene up to me when you see her,"

Lily nodded to Remus and the two started down the hall way, "I will see you later, James" she added over her shoulder before retreating down the hall way, "and it was nice meeting you Mr. Potter,"

"But-" James called after her, "I just-"

She appeared to not be listening, and James gave up after hearing his father chuckling beside him, "Good luck, son" stated his father, turning down the hallway that lead to the main entrance,

"What's that supposed to mean?" James demanded,

His father continued to laugh, "I think you know exactly what it mean," he concluded, "And if you're wondering, though I'm certain you're not, I approve."

"Just, go home dad," he said, a small smile on his face. James then turned down the hall, running down the opposite hall way after Lily and Remus.

* * *

><p>"If I could speak to Ms. Evans alone," Madame Pomfrey asked, turning towards James and Remus who had been standing next to Lily as the Healer had ran her many tests.<p>

James appeared shocked at the request, and made to protest but was dragged out into the corridor by Remus.

Once the door was firmly closed, the young healer turned towards Lily, examing the things she had written down on her clip board. "Can you recall who tortured you, Ms. Evans?"

Lily shook her head, "I'd like you to really try and remember," Madame Pomfrey added.

She in turn, remained silent after making her request as Lily tried to recall the faces or names of the people who had attacked her. "I really can't remember." she replied, slightly shocked, "There were three people, but I think one got away.."

"Whats the earliest you can remember before everything goes fuzzy?"

She waited a few moments before responding, "I can remember visiting my sister," Lily replied, frustrated with herself that she couldn't remember anything else.

The healer took out her quill and began to write on her clip board once again. "Alright." she began moments later, "You may go, although I would like you to keep trying to recall any of the events of that night. Small details are the most important, for example, what you were feeling, the temperature, the smell. I want you to rely less on your eyes, and what you saw. Start small, and we'll work our way up to sight."

"I would also like you to come and see me every week. Once a week, it doesn't matter on the day, just whatever works for you. If you forget then I am going to have to find you and I will probably make you stay the night as well."

Lily nodded that she understood, "Sorry, but Madame Pomfrey, there's just something I just can't quite grasp."

The healer raised her eyebrows, and urged her to continue on, "What's wrong with me?"

She heaved a sigh and glanced momentarially down at her clip board, debating whether or not to tell her. "There's evidence that you were tortured, and you can recall that you were as well. But we need to figure out the answers to some questions that you are unable to respond to. There's a horrible side effect to the cruciatus curse, Ms. Evans, which makes the fact that you're unable to recall certain events very worrisome."

"But-" Lily began, however she was cut off.

"I think I've said enough," interrupted the young Healer, walking towards her office "When I know more, I will tell you."

Lily turned around, and made her way out of the Hospital Wing. As she opened the door she heard Marlene squeal in delight, to which the three Marauder's quickly covered their ears in protest.

"Oh thank god!" Marlene had cried, pulling her best friend into a hug.

"Oh Lily flower!" Sirius exclaimed joining their hug, ignoring the strange looks from James and Remus at the nickname. "We're so happy to have you back!"

Lily smiled to herself, safe in the arms of her friends, "I'm happy to be back," she replied, knowing that things could only get better from that moment on.


	25. Chapter 25

_**Wednesday, January 19th**_

Lily exhaled the smoke into the cold night air, watching as it danced before her until disapearing into the nothingness. She sat with her legs through the railing on the astonomy tower, an invinsible feeling taking hold of her mind. The world seemed so much more simplestic viewing it from above, it was mapped out before her eyes, the world seemed easy.

In the back of her mind she was aware of the footsteps that drew closer towards her. The old Lily would have been nervous, it was way passed curfew, and although she had never heard of a rule against smoking on school grounds, she was sure it was frowned upon. However, the new Lily was too lost in her own musings to fully care that someone else had come up behind her.

The person cleared their throat, though Lily continued to ignore them, "Do you mind if I join you?" ask the very familiar voice,

She exhaled again, nodding her head as the smoke drifted away once again, and out of the corner of her eye she saw Sirius sit down next to her on the ledge, the only thing preventing them from falling was the flimsy metal railing.

Silence fell between them, and she could feel him studying her. She continued to stare forward, not daring to take her eyes of the black lake below her. Sirius tried multiple times to find the right words, but was unable to as he observed the bags under her eyes, the cigarette in her hand, the lack of determination and joy in her eyes. Lily Evans had given up.

"What are you doing up here?" he asked thoughtfully, picking up her half full pack of cigarettes and rotating the box in his hand.

Lily took another drag, taking a long pause before responding, "Gaining some perspective," she replied simply, as he took a cigarette from her box and lit one for himself.

It was only then did she finally look at him, taring her eyes away from the world below, looking at him with a curious expression. He stuck the cigarette in his mouth and lit the tip with his wand.

"The world seems so much smaller from up here, doesn't it?" Sirius stated in what seemed like a rhetorical way, syncronizing with her so they each exhaled at the same time, creating double the amount of smoke.

Lily nodded, staring up at the dark sky, "How did you know I was here?" she asked a few minutes later, curiosity getting the better of her.

Sirius shrugged in reply, "I didn't actually," he answered, "A happy accident,"

"And James?" she continued, "He didn't look me up on that map of yours and then send you up here to make sure I wasn't about to throw myself of the edge, did he?"

"That depends" he mocked, "on whether or not you throw yourself off the edge,"

She chuckled, assuring him that it had not been her intentions, "James just worries too much about me lately, I wouldn't put it passed him to have tracked me down than sent you up here to spy,"

"He's just protective of you," Sirius admitted, taking a long drag as if to permit him to think about what he would say next, "He doesn't believe that you're okay, even if you keep reassuring him of that,"

"And you?" Lily inquired, showing no signs of interest in the topic, although was extreme curious. "What do you think?"

"I don't _think. _I _kno_w that you're not okay" he replied firmly, "But the difference between James and I, is that he thinks he can fix you. I, however, know better than to believe in such things."

"So you think I'm broken?" she said, somewhat affraid to hear his response, "Broken beyond repair?"

Out of the corner of her eye she saw him shake his head, and couldn't help but feel a little relieved, "I don't think it's possible to _fix _people. We can only encourage them, and give them the sentiments they need to get better on their own. Like love, friendship, kindness, and sometimes, hostility, or anger."

"I don't think you're broken beyond repair," he corrected, "I just think that James is kidding himself, thinking that he can fix you, when in reality the only person that can fix you, is you."

"I'm scared, Sirius" she confessed moments later, dropping the rest of her cigarette off the edge, watching it fall. "I'm scared that I won't ever be able to fix myself, I'm scared that I'll never go back to the person I was,"

He nodded his agreement, taking a minute to understand her fully, "I don't think you'll ever be the old you again. Too much has changed for you to be able to simply, go back. But, things will move forward, and you'll be like the person that you used to be, though stronger, wiser, better."

Lily turned her gaze towards Sirius and simply observed him, he had changed so much and it was only now that she realized that there must have been a reason.

Gathering up her courage, she followed a hunch, "Why do you smoke, Sirius?"

He frowned at the question, but she could not tell whether he was in deep thought or just displeased; he answered anyway, "My family," he replied simply, "They are horrible people. When I smoke I forget that I'm related to them, that I share their same history, their same blood. I makes me feel like a completely seperate person,"

"Is that why you've matured so much over the past few years?" Lily asked, and to her surprise he responded once more.

"I could not be the same person that my parents were," he stated, "And it was only when I was on the receiving end of their curses, did I realize that I had been treating others the same way, bullying them and hurting them. I could not, from that moment on, let anyone else feel the way I did, expecially by my own hand."

She nodded, "Since my parents have been gone, I'd been ignoring this horrible gaping hole in my chest. I pushed my feelings down, and convinced myself that feeling guilty and upset was not normal. I smoke to fill that hole, because it's gotten so big that I can't ignore it anymore."

"Are you ever going to tell us about what happened while you were gone?" Sirius asked, mentally filing away every bit of information she let slip.

"Why don't you ever talk about your family, Sirius?" she countered, and he could sense she was trying to make a point.

He heaved a sigh, and reluctantly answered her question, "They are horrible people. I don't like the constant reminder that I'm one of them, I don't like lying awake at night wondering what would have happened if I hadn't been sorted into Gryffindor." he told her, "I guess it just hurts to much to think about, let alone _talk _about"

"A lot of things happened while I was away," she finally responded, "Talking about them would be reopening old wounds; it would just be hurtful."

"I can understand that," Sirius agreed, "But you have to make me one promise, and then I will never bring this up again,"

Lily said nothing, her eyes blankly staring out into the night, but Sirius could tell she was listening and continued on, "It all comes back to bite you eventually, and well, let's just say, everybody has their bad days. I know, from experience, that these are the worst of all bad days, they don't even compare. I guess, I just need to know that when you're having one of those days, you'll tell me about it. I understand more than anyone else, and we won't talk about it if you don't want to, we can come up here and smoke if you want. It's just, being alone on those horrible days, it really sucks and I don't want you to be alone."

"I'll tell you when I'm having a day," she muttered in response, and Sirius was satisfied that he had gotten through to her. "Although, I get this feeling that everyday from here on is going to be a bad one."

Sirius nodded along, however smirked slightly, "What I've learned recently, is that good things happen everyday. Good things happen, even when bad things happen. And I believe that on a bad day, well, good things can happen then too." he told her, taking a break and letting his words hang in the air before continuing on,

"And if you ever find your day is lacking in good things, you know where to find us."

"Us?" Lily questioned, a small smile threatening at her lips.

"Yes" Sirius stated, "Us. James, Remus, Marlene, Alice, Frank, Peter even, and everyone else. We're all looking out for you,"

Lily shrugged, "You really shouldn't be," she countered, "If anything I'm just a burden, you should just forget about it, that would probably be best."

He tossed the cigarette off the edge, getting to his feet, "You can say whatever you want, but you're not a burden, and we're definitely not going to just _forget _about it." he assured her, and silence fell between them.

Sirius took the position at her side and extended a hand offering to help her to her feet."You coming?" he asked, however she declined,

"I'm going to hang about for a little while longer," she replied,

He shoved his hands into his pockets, "Just be sure to vanish the smell before you go walking through the castle, and watch out for Flitch on your way down."

There was no reply, though once again, he was sure she had been listening. Feeling slightly accomplished, he retreated back down the stairs and back towards the Head's common room, where he would explain to James that she was perfectly fine. He knew that James would have gazed at the map and spotted them together, and that his best mate probably wouldn't sleep wihtout an explaination.

Sirius figured he may as well save his best mate from the task of coming to find him, mentally reminding himself to not mention the smoking aspect of their conversation. After all James had never been too fond of Sirius' disgusting habit, it would not do any good for him to know about Lily's same habit.

* * *

><p>"What did she say?" James demanded, glaring at Sirius from the top of the staircase. "What did you two talk about?"<p>

Sirius shrugged, placing his hands in his pockets and leaning against the wall, "Strangely enough, we talked about me." he replied, thinking back to their conversation, "She wanted to know why I did certain things, so I explained things to her,"

"Things like what?" he best mate asked, descending a few steps and sitting himself down a little ways down the staircase.

"Like, why I'm always joking around, or screwing around with birds," Sirius lied, not wishing to talk about the smoking with James that night, "things like that.."

"So she basically wanted to know why you're you..?" James joked, however Sirius did not laugh, catching the Head boy off guard.

"Alright" he demanded, "Was is it you're not telling me?"

Sirius glared down at his best mate, "Why do you think there's something I'm not telling you?" he quipped, slightly defensive.

"Usually you would've responded to that with a sarcastic comment or something," James answered, "Or at least laughed in spite of me, but you didn't. So clearly there's something you're not telling me,"

"I'm chosing not to tell you because you wouldn't want to know," he retorted, shrugging his shoulders as if it was nothing. Sirius kept his face emotionless when in turn, it worried him to see Lily smoking because he knew that it was a recent development. Her new habit was anything but nothing, it was a plea for help, as if she was screaming at him through her silence. But, he couldn't let James know this, because he could tell she didn't want him to know, she didn't want anyone to worry about her.

Sirius reflected on the past few days, seeing her laughing and smiling in the halls, he thought she was happy. When in turn, those smiles never fully reached her eyes, her laughter was always a bit forced. She was putting on a act that had them all fouled, she was wearing a mask to hide her sadness and despiration from them.

"I have the right to know!" James had shouted, and Sirius was only then aware that he had been talking to him the entire time.

Sirius shook his head, "If you really want to know so badly, you can just ask her yourself." he added, turning towards the portrait hole, and making his way out of the Head's common room, "But I'm not going to tell you, tonight or probably any time soon,"

"You're a rubbish best mate" James retorted, a hint of humor in his voice to assure Sirius that his comment wasn't sincere.

He didn't respond right away, stopping with his back to James at the coffee table. "I'm taking this with me," he said, over his shoulder, motioning to the map in his hands. "You don't need to spy on her anymore tonight,"

"I recon you're right" the Head boy agreed, getting up off the stairs and retreating to his dormitory as Sirius exited into the hall, fully inclined to lie to Remus and Peter about the events that had occured that night. The cigarettes that they had shared would be their secret.

* * *

><p>Lily had awoken early the next morning, in hopes of avoiding James. He was just looking out for her, and she knew that, but him constantly breathing down her neck, demanding things of her, questioning her; well, it got a little annoying. She wanted more then anything for people to just ignore that she had run away, she wished they would just go back to normal, and all of her friends had except for him. James could not get passed it, he followed her around, and Lily was sure he was constantly watching her on that map of his.<p>

She now sat at the Gryffindor table, one of the few very people in the Great Hall, which included two of the teachers and one other hufflepuff fifth year. Lily sipped at her tea, and read that mornings profit, enjoying her time alone while it lasted.

As she skimmed over the wedding annoucements a Hogwarts owl flew into the Hall, flying right over towards her and dropping a letter down onto the table. It chirped lowdly, retreating up to the owlry.

Lily stared skeptically at the letter, trying to determine who would be writting to her. No one came to mind.

Curious, she tore open the seal and unfolded the parchment, staring at the unfamiliar script :

_Dear Lily, _

_Now I doubt very much that you expected to hear from me, and if I might say, you're not the easiest person to get in contact with. It was only after that I had knocked on your sister's front door for nearly 10 minutes that she agreed to forward a letter to you, and I'm currently sitting on her porch trying to get this all down on paper.  
><em>

_Bloody hell it's been a long time since I wrote a letter.  
><em>

_Well it here goes then : I figured that I needed to check up on you. I mean, your sister's got her fiancee, but who have you got now to look out for you? And I don't mean to be rubbing that in your face or anything, those were not my intensions.  
><em>

_But ever since I heard about- well, you know. If been wondering who's been taking care of you.  
><em>

_I did eventually realize that you wouldn't let anyone take care of you even if someone tried, because you're too damn stubborn to show anyone any kind of weakness. Anyway, I'm writing to you for that specific reason.  
><em>

_I know you too well, and I know how to put up with all your shit. With the faces you put on to hide your feelings, and your pretending.  
><em>

_Basically, this is me saying, that I'm too smart to fall for all that. And I know you're broken, I don't have to even be near you and I already know this. So, your mission, whether you choose to except it or not, is it write me back.  
><em>

_I don't care if you ramble on for two pages about what you had for dinner last night, or the amount of sugar you put into your tea, (which would be a really boring store because I already know you don't put any sugar in your tea). I need to know you're still okay, and when you need someone to talk to, someone who you trust and who you've known for many years, well then, I suppose you can talk to me.  
><em>

_And I don't know what you're going through, I doubt anyone could relate, but I'm a great listener, and I will try to help you in any way possible.  
><em>

_I miss you and love you, Lily Evans.  
><em>

_And I know that you're freaking out because I said the 'L' word, since the last time we saw eachother I kissed you. But, in my defense, I had been dreaming about that kiss for years, and you just looked so damn good.  
><em>

_I'm not making this any better am I?  
><em>

_Well, you shouldn't be freaking out. I've met someone and we're sort of a thing, I'm not too sure, she doesn't really like titles, (wonderful eh?). Don't freak out because when I use the 'L' word, it's in that kind of brother/sister type way.  
><em>

_And I know you're probably heart broken, but that guy you're in to is probably doing back flips now. (And yes, I know there's a guy. I'm kind of physic that way..)  
><em>

_Of course, I don't approve of you dating at all really, I doubt he's good enough for you.  
><em>

_I'm now realizing that I've rambled on a bit here, and well, your sister's getting really inpatient so I'm going to wrap it up.  
><em>

_Tell me about your problems, because I know you're not going to tell any of your friends. You don't like change, you never had, you telling them would mean that you were accepting the change, letting it happen, and I know you won't do that.  
><em>

_So, tell me. It's not real change because we've known each other for so long, and I know you and your situation.  
><em>

_I will be awaiting your reply,  
><em>

_yours, Jacob  
><em>

Upon reading the letter, the events of the night of her sister's wedding came flooding back. She remembered how Jacob had twirled her around the grand room which the reception was held in, and how the night before they had spent the whole rehearsal dinner catching up, and talking like they had never been apart.

Lily smiled at the memory of how beautiful her sister looked walking down the aisle, and eventhough she did not like the man she was marrying, she couldn't help but notice how happy he looked. She remebers feeling proud to be there, proud to have had such an amazing sister, who, during the years before Hogwarts, had been her best friend.

The image of her father walking her sister down the aisle popped into her head, the smile on his face, the tears in his eyes. It hurt to think about him.

Then suddenly, she remembers her mother squeezing her hand during their vows, and tears fell from both of their eyes. It hurt to think about her as well.

She tore her thoughts away from that night, having to hold back tears while sitting in the Great Hall. Remembering that her parents were once so happy, so in love with eachother, and so competely devoted to their two children who weren't on great terms.

Lily thought back to when Jacob had come running after her, and kissed her, so hurriedly but so pationately. Her thoughts drifted away from him to the Head boy.

She would never admit to anyone that while she was gone she spent many nights crying to herself, wishing that he was there, holding her, protecting her. Though, she would only cry harder at the realization that he would never be, he would never hold her because, as far as she knew, he still had a girl friend.

_Jessica_.

She shuddered at the name, praying for something to distract her to prevent her thoughts from straying towards the topic of his relationship.

And fortunately for Lily, that something was in the mist of walking into the Great Hall.

James took the place at the Gryffindor table across from her, flashing her a smile and pouring coffee into his mug. "You're up early," he stated, causing her to put down the paper she had been trying to read.

"Couldn't sleep," she replied simply, "Besides, it's not _that _early,"

He raised his eyebrows, observing the Great Hall, "McGonagall isn't even here yet," he countered, nodding towards the staff table, "And she's always been an early riser"

"Then why are you down here?" Lily asked, titling her head ever so slightly, "If it's _so _early.."

James shrugged in reply, causing Lily to roll her eyes, picking up her cup and drinking the rest of the tea in her cup. She watched intently as he made his coffee, passing him the milk before he could ask her too, which only made him laugh.

"You know what I put in my coffee?" he questioned, not bothering to hide his smirk,

Lily grinned, "You know what I put in my tea.." she stated, avoiding answering him.

"That's irrelivant," James said, shaking his head, but quickly dropping the subject upon spotting the front page of the daily profit. "Have you read the paper this morning?"

"I read the wedding announcements," Lily said, pushing the profit over towards him.

He laughed at her and opened it up to the first page.

Lily rested her head on her hand and watched as his eyes skimmed over the most recent news about the wizard who was quickly rising to power. His face remained emotionless, his mouth turned into a frown as he continued to read. The difference between the two of them was that he wanted to know about the horrible situations outside of Hogwarts, however, after having had to experience it, Lily wanted to avoid the news as much as possible. It's for that reason, that every morning when the paper came, she would instantly flip to the back, where the profit posed wedding annoucements and small articles about Quidditch and rising tax rates.

"Lily" stated James, not bothering to look up from the profit, "It's really not very polite to stare,"

She mirrored his smirk, "You've been doing it for years," she quipped,

He quickly finished reading the section and put the paper down, suddenly interested in their conversation, "Wait?" he demanded, with a joking tone, "You noticed that?"

"It was kind of hard not to notice," Lily replied, "To be perfectly honest"

"You've always been really observant," James added, taking off his glases and running a hand through his hair.

Lily laughed in spite of him, "I really didn't have to be," she said, "It's not like you were being sly about it"

He stuck his tongue out at her, snatching a piece of toast off her plate, unable to stop himself from smiling at her being back at Hogwarts with him."So Evan's" James replied flashing her his famous smirk, "Would I be wrong to assume that you're staring because you're starting to finally like what you see?"

Lily rolled her eyes, snatching the paper off the table and flipping to the finance section, assuring James that there was nothing better to read. "So am I supposed to take you reading as a hint that you don't want to talk to me anymore?" he questioned further.

She made an effort not to reply, "So we're supposed to just sit here in silence?" James demanded in mock horror.

"Yes" Lily said, not daring to look up from the paper, a small smile playing at her lips.

James crossed his arms over his chest, "Fine, we will then" he said.

But of course they didn't and were back to talking only a few moments later.


	26. Chapter 26

_**Saturday, January 29th  
><strong>_

The initial shock that Lily had returned had finally begun to die down, and it seemed as if people were beginning to forget that she had been missing at all. Everything was finally going back to normal, or going back to as normal as things could get that this point.

She sat in the Head's common room, staring into the fire, her recently finished potions essay lying beside her. She had been sitting in the same position ever since her return from dinner, when Marlene had told her that she couldn't work on homework with her because she was spending time with the Gryffindor keeper, Gregory Andrews.

She flicked her wand and the dying fire sprung to life once again. Suddenly, she felt all the suppressed emotion surface once more, and having hidden it all week she couldn't prevent it anymore. Tears sprung to her eyes, and in the solitude of the common room she began to cry, they silently streamed down her cheeks.

She had ran away to find herself, to deal with this emotion alone, but can only remember her actually facing it the first night on her own. Lily wondered if she would ever get passed this, she wondered if things would ever get better again.

Lily heard approaching footsteps, and quickly wiped her tears away before someone else could see them. Out of the corner of her eye she saw the portrait swing open and James emerge.

He walked in, however stopped upon spotting her, remaining rooted in his spot. This had been the third night in a row he had walked in on her like this, clearly something was deeply wrong. As he was about to say something, he remembered something that she had told him the first time this had happened:

_"Do you want to talk about it?" he had asked, realizing that she had been crying. Lily, though, didn't feel like talking, and didn't respond. "You can tell me, you know. I won't tell anyone else, if that's what your worried about,"_

_She sat in silence, staring into the fire. Hoping and praying that he would take her silence as a sign and leave her alone.  
><em>

_"Lily?" he questioned further, scooting closer to her on the couch, "What's going on?"  
><em>

_She sighed in response, turning her head away from him to hide her tears, realizing that the idea of him leaving her to be had been wishful thinking. James would continue to pester her until she spoke to him.  
><em>

_Admitting defeat early, she replied, her face still hidden, "Please, just leave me." she had whispered, trying and failing to keep her voice steady.  
><em>

_He placed his hand on hers in an attempt to get her to look at him, "You've been crying," he simply stated, squeezing her hand reassuringly. "I can't just let you be when you're clearly very upset"  
><em>

_"Yes, you can" she had continued, "Because I know you mean well, and I know that you think that the more noble thing to do when someone is upset is to try and help them."  
><em>

_Lily could feel him staring at her, desperately trying to get her to meet his eyes, but she would not let him see her face. "But, what you don't understand is that, sometimes the more noble thing to do when someone is trying to hide their tears is to pretend as if you don't see them.."  
><em>

_"So you just want me to leave?" he demanded in what was supposed to be a soft tone but came out rather harsh, "To _pretend _as if I haven't seen anything?" _

_She hadn't replied, but in truth, she hadn't needed to for James had gotten the message. He squeezed her hand before retracting his own and disappearing into the corridor once more, leaving her completely alone.  
><em>

For the past two days he had done what she had told him, he had pretended that he didn't see her crying. But, as the days went on he found it harder and harder not to do anything for her, and now, standing in front of her, he couldn't simply walk by.

However, as he approached her, he went about a different way than the last time. Instead of asking her to tell him, and demanding what he can do to help her, James sat down next to her and pulled her on to his lap in his arms.

She had been slightly shocked, and had gone rigid, although as he continued to hold her close, she relaxed into him, sobbing into his chest. Lily hadn't said anything, she had just cried in his arms until she had drifted off into somewhat of a sleep. He reasoned with himself that she had probably wished that he would've ignored her again tonight, but James was rather proud of himself that he didn't.

Slowly, he got up from the couch and carried her up the staircase towards her bedroom. Nudging her door open with the tip of his foot, walking into her room and placing her down on her bed. He pulled the blankets over her sleeping body, and kissed her softly on the forehead before exiting her room into his own.

* * *

><p>"Lily!" cried her mother, running down the small corridor from the kitchen towards the front hall. "Welcome home!"<p>

Her mother had wrapped her arms around her, and held her closely, her father coming up behind them and joining in on the hug. Lily laughed as the two refused to let her go, and continued to hold on to her, their arms tight around her.

However, she suddenly realized the peril of her situation as the arms of her parents continued to squeeze her tighter and tighter. Lily felt herself gasping for air, pushing against them to release her, but the arms kept on getting tighter. She was struggling and fighting against them to try and break free but with every movement she made it worse.

Lily tried to call for help, but when she opened her mouth, no sound came out. Her vision became blurry and she felt her head get extremely heavy. The world around her then went black.

"Get up!" someone cried, poking her with the tip of their foot.

She opened her eyes and was back in her apartment, Bellatrix standing over her, holding her wand menacingly. "Tell me where it is or they die!" she shouted, ushering to the four people behind her.

Lily strained her eyes, as the figures finally came into focus. They were her friends; Bellatrix was going to murder her friends. "I don't know what you're talking about!" shouted Lily in hopeful reply.

She was met by a familiar curse, the sharp shooting pain filling up her entire body, slowly moving up through her legs, in her torso, up her chest and into her head. "Please, don't hurt my friends" she pleaded, tears welling up in her eyes.

Though Bellatrix didn't even acknowledge that she had heard her and turned towards the others. She started with Marlene, and without a second thought muttered the killing curse, and the blonde fell.

Lily watched with horror as the insane woman raised her wand once more, this time pointing it at Remus. He hit the ground before Lily could even protest.

The next in line was Sirius, and although he muttered insults and tried to fight his cousin off, without a wand he was easily overpowered. He too was killed.

"Lily" James told her, as Bellatrix raised her wand, preparing for her second to last kill, "This is all your fault" and the glare he gave her was still plastered upon his face, as he too fell to the ground.

Bellatrix raised her wand and Lily let loose a sob, praying that this would be over.

However as the woman raised her wand to kill her final victim just as Lily awoke with a start.

She sat up in her four poster bed, unable to recall how she had ended up there, but she felt comfort in seeing her own room. Lily still shook with fear, and new tears rolled down her cheeks, the idea of her friends, along with her parents, dead. It was too much to handle, along the memory of that night in her apartment when three death eaters had cornered and interrogated her still fresh in her mind.

Unable to take it she swung her legs off her bed and walked over towards her door. Exiting into the hall way and taking a few big steps towards the other door on the other side of the small corridor. Raising her small fist she considered knocking, however dropped her hand to the door knob instead and simply opened the door.

Lily quickly observed the sleeping James, and found comfort in seeing him alive.

She was just about to retreat back into her own room, when his tired voice startled her, "Lily?" he demanded, squinting his eyes unable to see very well without his glasses, "Is that you?"

"Yeah" she had replied, realizing that she sounded as if she had been crying, "I was just- well I mean,"

He stared at up her in confusion, unable to understand why she was in his room at one in the morning. As she continued to stammer, he finally understood.

"Come here" he ushered her, grabbing her hand when she was close enough and pulling her into his bed, throwing some of the blankets over top of her. He pulled her in towards him, wrapping his arms around her, "Everything's okay, you're safe."

She sighed, turning to look at him, tears in her eyes. "Is this all my fault?" she whispered, "Are my parents dead because of me?"

"What?" he demanded, staring down at her, taken aback by her questions, "No! Of course this isn't your fault."

"James" she responded, curling up into him, "I'm so sorry."

He shook his head, burrowing it into her hair. "Don't apologize," he mumbled, "None of this is your fault, no one blames you for any of this,"

"Yes they do," she countered, a few tears cascading down their cheeks, "Everyone thinks this is my fault, that I put this all on my family. Me being a witch got them killed."

"Lily" he began, wiping the tears from her eyes, "No one blames you, no one is thinking any of that, and even if they were they would be wrong. You're not at fault, you didn't do anything wrong."

There was no reply, and James wasn't too sure as if she had believed him or not. He figured that it wouldn't do much good brining it up again, and he simply dropped it.

"I am sorry though," Lily said, after a few moments of silence, looking up at James, "for worrying you,"

"All is forgiven" he answered, looking at her through one open eye, "I'm just happy you're safe,"

She smiled, and he closed his eyes. "I really missed everyone," she told him, closing her own eyes, and relaxing into his arms. "I really missed you,"

"I would've assumed as much," James answered, kissing the top of her head once more, mumbling something about missing her much more than she could imagine, "Now shut it, I'm trying to sleep."

Lily smiled to herself, and eventually in the security of James' arms, fell back asleep.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Sunday, January 30th<br>**_

"Moony!" Sirius hissed, pouncing on his mate, "Get up! You have to see this!"

Remus rubbed his eyes, displeased after being awoken in such a painful way. "Padfoot" he grumbled, pushing his mate off of him and rolling over, "Go back to sleep,"

Sirius shook his shoulders, "No!" he whispered, "You have to see this right now,"

"Whatever it is" Remus answered, "Can wait another few hours"

"It's about Lily!" Sirius shouted, causing Peter to stir in the bed beside them, "She's, well, you'd never believe it if I told you, so you're just going to get up and look at the map yourself!"

Remus slowly opened his eyes, and let Sirius shove the map into his face, directing her gaze specifically at the Headboy's dormitory. He instantly, shot up into a sitting position, and grabbing the parchment out of his mates hands, staring at it more closely. "I don't believe it" he mumbled under his breath, "I really don't believe it,"

"Well, there's no way we're wrong" Sirius countered, "the map is never wrong, she's there, in his bed, with him"

Remus shook his head, "Well, I'm just going to have to go and see this for myself," he said, smiling at Sirius, jumping from his bed and making his way over towards his bedside table.

He ripped open the drawer and rummaged around inside until he pulled a small camera out, "We're going to want to remember this one" he said, gazing at the spot once more on the map, "It almost seems as if she missed him as much as she missed her,"

"Impossible" disagreed Sirius, leading Remus out the door, leaving Peter to sleep, "You should've heard him back at the house, the things he said, there's no way anyone else could ever miss another person that much"

Remus chuckled under his breath, making his way down the stairs with Sirius towards the Head's common room, "I could only imagine," he agreed, breaking into a run once they were in the corridor.

They muttered the password to the portrait, letting them into the Head's common room and crept up the stairs, "Well be quick," Remus informed Sirius, "Get in, get the picture and get the hell out"

The boy in question rolled his eyes, "Why in the world to we _have _to get a picture of this?" Sirius demanded, nudging the door open with the tip of his foot.

"So when they finally get together, after all this time, we can show this to them" he admitted, putting the camera to his eye, and placing himself in a perfect position, "And they can remember the days when they were falling in love"

"Falling in love?" Sirius whispered in reply, scratching his head, "Since when are they in love?"

Remus sighed, catching the picture and putting his camera down before turning back towards his mates, "Ever since fifth year, when James stood up for Lily after Snape called her a you-know-what" Remus told him, smiling at the memory.

"Are you mad?" he demanded, "She hated him for years after that!"

"Nah, she didn't" Remus continued, using his wand to shrink his camera to fit into the pocket in his pajama pants, "She acted like it, sure. But only because she didn't want anyone to figure it out, I doubt she had even realized it for herself. Let's just say, after being so close to Lily for years before our fifth I started to pick up on certain habits and expressions." he whispered to Sirius as both Lily and James stirred in bed.

Sirius let out a bark of a laugh, "Oh look here!" he cried, "It seems like we have a Lily expert on our hands." Smirking at Remus who rolled his eyes in response, as Lily brought her hands up towards her face to rub her eyes.

He quickly motioned to James' invisibility cloak draped over his dresser, and quickly the two boys crouched under it before she noticed that they were in the room.

"Shit" Lily hissed, abruptly jumping out of their mates bed making her way over towards the door, hoping to flee the scene as quick as possible.

"Lily" James grumbled, waking at the sudden absence of another person in his arms, "Where are you going?"

The two boys watched as Lily's cheeks turned a rather bright shade of crimson, "I really must be going, this was definitely not the smartest of ideas." she whispered under her breath and left before James could protest.

James sighed, flopping back down onto his pillow, and running a hand through his hair.

Sirius pulled the invisibility cloak off the them, "Tough luck though mate," Sirius tried, causing his best mate to jump in surprise, "But, come on, did you see her face?"

Remus nodded in agreement, "Redder than a tomato," he continued "And the way she practically ran out of here. If I didn't know any better I'd say that someone very special fancies our dear Prongs"

"How long have you two been there?" James demanded, glaring at them, "And what the hell are you doing here?!"

"What?" countered Sirius, "We can drop in on our best mate anymore?"

James shook his head in response, rolling out of bed and walking over towards the washroom. Once out of sight of his best mates, he smiled to himself knowing that they had been right. Without even realizing, he had begun to dance in the safety of the room although suddenly stopped when he heard the distinct sound of a camera flash and his snickering best mates.

He turned slowly to see his fellow Marauder's nearly crying with laughter, "That was a wonderful shot!" Sirius told Remus through gasps of air.

"Oh yes," James groaned, narrowing his eyes, "A very nice shot" he concluded dryly, firmly closing and locking the bathroom door behind him.

* * *

><p>Sirius paced around his dormitory, while James and Remus watched him intently. He had asked their opinion on something, although they had been seated in front of him for nearly twenty minutes in silence. Sirius would stop and faced them, mouth open, never able to find the right words and would continue to pace.<p>

"Padfoot" began James, checking his watch for the fifth time, "You know I have a ton of more planning to do before tonight"

He nodded, "Yes, yes" Sirius continued, "I know all about your big birthday plans for Lily to make sure this the best day, and how this all fits in with your bigger picture of your huge _finally_ winning her over plans, I get it."

James bit his tongue, with a warning glance from Remus decided against starting an argument. He heaved a sigh upon realizing that he wasn't going to be able to leave until Sirius told him what was on his mind, "Is there anything we can do to help you get this out... or what?" James muttered bitterly under his breath.

"Just give me a minute" Sirius hissed back in reply. He closed his eyes running the same scenario through his mind for the seventh time, trying once again to find the right words.

"I only have five," James told him firmly, giving him a stern look that clearly suggested for his mate to get on with it, earning him an elbow in the ribs courtesy of Remus.

Sirius walked over to James and checked his mates watch, sighing at the amount of time that had passed. "I need to get this out, it's been eating me up inside!" he shouted angrily in reply, running his two hands through his hair to calm his frustration, "But I can't find the damn words, and it's all her damn fault!"

Remus and James shared a look, and suddenly everything started to make sense. "It's Marlene, isn't it?" asked Remus, knowing he was right before Padfoot nodded.

"But she's dating Andrews, the _Gryffindor _keeper" James pointed out, crossing his arms. "If you were to mess that up.. well, we would surely lose every single game this spring."

"I know, I know" Sirius assured him, "But I just-"

He tried to explain; however, James refused to even give him a chance. "We've worked way too hard for you to go mucking it up now. Andrews would never forgive you or Marlene. Everything we've worked for, every game we've won will have all been for nothing just because you want to try things out _again_,"

Remus put up his hand to silence Sirius, watching as his mate grew angrier by the minute, "Would you consider someone's problems before your own?" he demanded of James, "Just this once, can't you just shut up!"

James, although surprised, shut his mouth.

Sirius dropped his head to the ground, as the guilt of breaking up another relationship grew inside of him. He had already considered everyone, and how they would be affected, but none of it actually seemed to matter. "I didn't mean to do it," he pleaded, "You know how I feel about her, you know that I have terrible self control!"

"What the hell did you do?" Remus asked lightly.

Sirius swore under his breath, "It was during the victory party, after Marlene and I had successfully worked together to prevent the Hufflepuff seeker from catching the snitch." he told him, "I didn't mean it to happen. Andrews was off, completely pissed drunk, talking to some other bird and it was starting to upset her. So we left, she was bothered enough not to want to stay in the same room and I was gentleman enough not to want her to be roaming the corridors on her own."

"Oh bloody hell" James muttered, "Why do I know where this is going..?"

"Yes alright, fine!" Sirius shouted in reply, "I kissed her, and hell, she damn kissed me back!"

James checked his watch realizing that he was already late, and no matter how fast he ran, no matter how many short cuts he took. He was not going to make it to the third floor staircase before she did. He swore under his breath, "Fine, I'll just catch up to her later," he told the others, however they each seemed uninterested.

"Prongs, Moony," he said address them both, taking a serious tone, "I can't watch her and Andrew be together anymore. I love her and it's killing me."

"Wait!" intervened Remus, standing to meet Sirius, "Hold that thought. You _love _her?!"

James, equally as shocked at the sudden confession, could not make it to his feet. "Since when do you even know what love is?" he asked, "I don't believe what I'm hearing."

"Both of you!" Sirius shouted, a small smile playing at his lips, feeling a sense of relief wash over him. "Won't you just shut up about it, you know this isn't knew information. You've known for months, probably longer than I've known!"

"It's just weird" Remus countered, sitting back down next to James, "Hearing you say it.."

"I'm tired of feeling this way," he replied, "When I see then together I get this burning feeling in the bit of my stomach and I really want to sock the bloke. When she talks about him, I only wish that she would be talking about me instead. When she's upset I want her to come to me, so I can make her feel better. That's why I kissed her, and that's why she kissed me back."

"Moony," started James, "I recon his _is_ in love,"

"God, where _is_ Peter?" Remus demanded to no one in particular,"He should definitely be here for this. We're dealing with a code 10 emergency."

"This is not a code 10." Sirius replied rolling his eyes, "This is a very mild situation that can easily be solved with me, throwing myself off the Astronomy tower."

James sighed once again, realizing that Remus was still in too much of a shocked state to deal with their fellow Marauder. "You're going to be fine," he assured Sirius, "I can help you,"

"Yeah, because getting the girl sure worked out for you, didn't it Prongs?" Sirius quipped, smirking as his best mate's expression fell. "It's just- when she broke up with me last time and promised me we would never be getting back together, I refused to believe it. But she's moved on and she's ridiculously happy with Andrews."

"But she kissed you back?" Remus started, an idea forming in his mind.

He nodded in reply, frustratingly running a hand through his hair, angry at his inability to find a logical solution. "There's got to be something wrong," Remus added, "There is no way she would've let you kiss her unless-"

"Unless there was something wrong with her and Andrews," finished James, high-fiving Remus in their success at getting to the bottom of the problem.

"Alright" Sirius nodded excitedly, "So what do I do? Should I talk to her? Or steal James' Valentines day plans and tell her how I feel later?"

Remus shook his head, unable to hide a smile, "No, definitely not," he told him, "If she regrets kissing you, then she's probably feeling extremely guilty for cheating on Andrews, you don't want to add to that guilt by tell her how you feel. You can't talk to her until you know if there is actually something wrong."

"But how?" he asked,

"James is going to ask Lily about Marlene and Andrew's relationship." Remus continued, patting his mate on the back.

Although, James was quick to disagree, "I can't," he replied, "If Lily ever found out that I had told you, she would never forgive me. You know how she is about secrets,"

"Since when have you given a damn?" demanded Sirius, frustrated at his best mate. "You break secrets all the damn time."

"When you care about someone as much as I care about her, the things she cares about become important to you as well." James informed them,

"One more question" he replied, unable to hid a smile, "Have you been a girl this entire time, or it is a recent thing?"

James rolled his eyes, "I'm not the one confessing my feelings here, Padfoot" he pointed out, "If anyone is a girl here, _well_, all fingers are pointed at you."

Remus interjected before the two could start arguing, "Let's just call this a tie," he said, "You're both pretty little girls"

"Hey now" Sirius started, "Neither of us said anything about pretty, but than again, we are extremely attractive."

Remus ignored his mates comment, and continued on anyway, "And Padfoot, you need not worry because James is going to talk to Lily and then relay the information back to us. You're practically a brother to him, he's not going to just sit there and watch you suffer while he could be doing something productive."

"I hate how you know me so well," replied James, checking his watch and getting to his feet, "I was going to help, but I was going to let him suffer for a bit. Thanks for ruining the plan, Moony."

The boy in question, shrugged in reply. Each of his two best mates smirking wildly.

He looked at them with his eyebrows raised, "Just get out of here, Prongs" Remus told him, "Get out of here and get us some damn answers!"

* * *

><p>James spent the entire day searching for Lily, however no matter where he looked, even on the Marauder's map, he couldn't find her. Unable to stop his mind from worrying, he asked many people<p>

"Lily?" James questioned, walking into the Head's common room, slightly horrified of the disaster that lay before him. He spotted Lily sitting at her favourite table, reading furiously, and although she appeared quite calm the rest of the room was in a very heated state. Bits of parchment flew around the room, and with a flick of her wand Lily would summon them over, making a few corrections before sending them off again. A cauldron rested on the coffee table, nearly bubbling over, however the Head girl would flick her wand once more and the ladle laying next to it would stir it down.

"What is going on?" he demanded, ducking under many pieces of parchment, "Where have you been all day?"

She ignored him and continued working furiously. After multiple attempts to deter her from her work, James pulled out of his wand and cast a freezing charm on everything in the room besides them. Instantly, the pieces of parchment stopped in mid-air, the quills that were charmed stopped mid-sentence and he cauldron stopped boiling.

Her hair a mess, and looking extremely tired, she tore her gaze away from her work. "What is it you want?" she asked politely, though he knew she wasn't pleased that he had interrupted her work.

"I've been looking for you all day!" he exclaimed, "Where in the world have you been?"

She shrugged, "I've been in the castle, talking to professors, working in the library, I was in the potions room at one point," she answered, "I've just been catching up on things. You wouldn't even believe how behind I am on my work,"

"You look exhausted," James bluntly pointed out, "When was the last time you had a decent night sleep?"

Lily didn't respond, instead she began to flip through her defense text book, picking it up off the table and walking towards him, "I was actually hoping you could help me out with this one spell," she started, pointing to the instructions which he didn't even look at, "I've been having difficulty with it and I was told that there was going to be a test any day now, I can't fall more behind."

"Lily," he answered, taking the book from her and tossing it on to the couch, "Have you been working all day? Have you even eaten?"

She shook her head, "I had something to eat a few hours ago, at breakfast,"

"Breakfast was nearly twelve hours ago," he interrupted,

She checked her watch, tapping on the glass casing, "I guess my watch must have stopped," she said, walking over towards the couch and picking up her text book, "Now, are you going to help me with this spell or not?"

"Not," James replied, taking the text book once more, "But I am going to help you,"

He grabbed her hand and pulled her from the common room, "We're going to have a little fun," he replied, leading her out into the corridor, much to her displeasure.

"I have no time for fun," she cut in, "There are too many things to do.."

"Lily do you even know what day it is?" he demanded, turning towards her, eyebrows raised.

She shrugged in reply, "It doesn't all that much matter," she answered, "Besides, I've lost track of the days. Is it February yet?"

He once again began to pull her down the corridor, "We're definitely going to do something," he forcefully told her, "It's your birthday for bloody sake, you can't spend your entire day working."

Realizing that she had no susceptible arguments, she agreed and followed him as he continued down the hall.

James had first brought her back to his old dormitory, where Remus, Sirius and Marlene were seated, all waiting patiently for her to arrive and had all jumped in excitement when she had walked through the door. There had been many exclamations of her age, and how they were all growing old so fast.

She had received gifts from all of them. She had imagined them to have been bought at the last minute, and hastily wrapped with magic. Lily sat upon James' old bed, with him next to her and the rest of their friends scattered around the room, and they all passed her their gifts. She started with Sirius', after he had pestered her into it, and opened the large box to find a small photo frame filled with the most recent picture of them. They had taken it during one of the first few days of their seventh year under the large beach tree near the black lake. Lily appeared to be pouting and upset with something Sirius had said or done, although a small smile eventually grew on her face and the two of them dissolved into laughter. She had hoped off the bed and walked over to him, whispering her thanks in his ear before planting a small kiss on his cheek and returning to her spot.

Marlene had handed her an envelope, and Lily quickly tore it open. Inside were two pieces of parchment, both of which she refused to share with the three Marauders. Lily blushed deeply, assuring Marlene that she had completely forgotten about the agreement that they had made back in forth year, however Marlene was not accepting. She had laughed mercilessly, promising Lily that the bet they had made was still on. Lily made a face of protest, although it was ignored as she was handed her next gift.

Frank and Alice, unable to be there, had left her a rectangular box. Carefully, she opened it and looked inside to find a potted lily. She pulled it out from the box and held it up for the entire room to see. Reading aloud a small note that had been attached to it's stem; _This is no ordinary lily. It's a rare kind said to be found where the mountains reach the moon. It travels backwards, starts at the end and grows until it's a seed. We, however, have slowed it's time clock so the process will continue on for the many years to come. Happy Birthday, Lily. We hope that you have the best year!  
><em>

Remus smiled at her, passing her his small gift, sitting down next to her as she opened it. Inside she found multiple copies of his books, and she knew that in every book he will have charmed something magnificent to happen. Lily remembered borrowing one of his books in their fifth year, when he had finally handed it over to her he had charmed the words to play out the scene she was reading. At the bottom of the pile had been their favourite muggle book that they had shared for the past few years and he was finally returning it to her. After every read, they had decided to add something to the book, a small marking or comment, so that there was always something new when the other person re-read it. She smiled brightly, assuring him that she would start reading them that night.

She then turned to James expectantly, and a smirk grew on his face. Suddenly he reminded Sirius, Marlene and Remus that the two of them had to go and took Lily by the hand, leading her out the door back to their common room. He demanded that she put on warmer clothes and meet him in front of the Great Hall before disappearing into the corridor once more.

Lily arrived in the Great Hall before James, and witnessed him come into the warm from outside. "We're not going out there are we?" Lily asked, shivering at the very idea of the cold January weather.

James pulled a blind fold from his winter coat, "Come on Evans," he whispered, walking over towards her and placing it over her eyes, "It wouldn't be a surprise if I told you, now would it?"

They seemed to be walking for a very long time, and on some occasions James had picked her up off her feet to avoid some sort of obstacle. "James," Lily groaned, "Are we almost there yet?"

"Just, hold on, a few more steps." he assured her, dropping her hand that he had been holding to guide her. "Okay, go on. Take off the blind fold."

The next few moments seemed to happen as if in slow motion. She removed her blind fold and in front of her was a ladder. James had left her standing in front of her favourite beach tree close to the black lake, and had disappeared into the unknown. Realizing that he had set this up, she climbed the latter to the top, where he had magically suspended a small platform big enough for both of them to sit on.

He came out from behind her, a huge grin plastered on his face, holding a small little gift in his hands. "I had Daisy make a few treats and I figured we could sit up here for a while." James said taking a seat on the wooden platform.

"How long has this been up here?" Lily asked, having never spotted it before.

James shrugged, "Remus and Peter put it up a few years ago, and would come up here when they wanted to get away from Sirius and I; it was only a few months ago that they told us about this place" he stated, gazing around at the platform in awe.

"Can you really blame them?" Lily replied, taking a seat across from him.

James laughed out loud, "No, I guess I can't. We could be bloody annoying." he agreed, fingering the small gift he had for her in his hands.

Lily hadn't seemed to have noticed the small gift and kept taking, waving her wand in the air adding a heat charm to keep them warm. "What does Peter do these days anyway? He's never with you guys anymore."

He shrugged, "He's made a bunch of Hufflepuff friends, they get together and study. Surprisingly, he's doing much better than he would be with Remus tutoring him; not that Remus is a bad tutor.." James said.

"I know what you mean." Lily cut across him, "I even tried tutoring Peter; it was hopeless."

"Yeah, it would probably be hopeless for the second best in our year." James challenged, a smirk growing on his face.

Lily raised her eyebrows, "You're not the best in our year," she argued, "Definitely not; I'm the best, Remus is second and then it's you."

"Come on!" he opposed, "Aren't I at least second?"

Lily shook her head, "Not even second."

"You're definitely wrong. But, in the spirit of your birthday I will not argue this with you, so you win." James replied, handing her the gift "Anyway, I have a little something for you and I don't want our argument to ruin this."

Lily look down at the gift in his hands and smiled. "I saw this in one of the shops when I was home over Christmas, and I thought of you so I bought it; planning to give it to you whenever I could." James started, pulling the top off the box.

She gasped slightly upon seeing the necklace, and James took it out of the box, undoing the clasp and motioning for her to move her hair out of the way.

* * *

><p>They had stayed outside for an hour or so, before the heating charm started to faulter and they decided to return to their common room.<p>

"You don't understand how much I appreciated this," Lily told him, touching the necklace around her neck, admiring it like she had done so all night.

James smiled, nodding his head. "No, I get it" he replied.

She saw right through him, smiling up at him, one of her first genuine smiles in a long time. "You don't" she countered, "You bend over backwards just to make me happy, and you do an amazing job of it."

"And I know I've been short with you, and horrible to you. Truthfully, I've probably caused you a great deal of pain over the years that you definitely did not deserve." she added,

He shook his head, "No, no" he replied, "That's where you're wrong, I definitely deserved it."

Lily sighed, dropping her gaze from his and observed their common room, realizing that she was going to have to finish all the work that he had taken her from. "Well, even so." she answered, chuckling at him as a brief silence fell between them.

"I'm glad I make you happy," he admitted moments later, tension growing between them.

In reply Lily took a few steps closer to him, standing on her tip-toes she placed a hesitant kiss on his cheek, lingering in his close presence for a moment. She closed her eyes, taking his him in fully; his smell; the small sigh he let loose as she had kissed him; his breath on her neck.

Her eyes fluttered open and she leaned slightly backwards, catching him staring down at her. She witnessed something flash through his eyes, and recognized it instantaneously, because she desired it as well.

Lily became instantly aware of how close they were standing, and she took a small step back from him. Displeased, James took a courageous step towards her, becoming closer than they had been previously.

He was leaning closer towards her, and she knew that she should stop him. But didn't.

James drew closer and closer, waiting for her to say it. But it never came. So he closed the gap between them.

His heart was beating in the back of his throat, pounding and _pounding, _up through his chest into his head.

And he was ever so aware of the fact that he was doing what he had been dreaming of for years.

And that it was exactly as he imagined it being.

He had pushed her up against the nearest wall in desperation. He craved her body against his; his lips against hers; her hands in his hair as they toyed with the small hairs on the back of his head.

James responded to her enthusiastically, moving his lips in perfect time with hers as he deepened their kiss.

A small moan issues from the back of her throat, that only encourage him on. She, in turn, felt dizzy with his body pressed to hers and as he continued to kiss her so passionately. Years worth of feeling in one kiss, and it was the best she's ever had.

She returned with ardor, kissing him so hard that he faltered ever so slightly before regaining his arrogance.

He ran his hands up and down her torso, resting his hands on her hips ever so often and pulling them close to him until they were pressed up against him. Her breath caught in her throat and she gripped his hairs to keep her hands from trembling as his hands found the bare skin under her shirt. One rested on the base of her stomach, as the other slowly made it's way up her spine.

His arms tightened around her, and they broke the kiss only for a second as she lifted his shirt up over his head. James grinned wildly, kissing her softly at first, teasing her before she deepened the kiss.

His hands found their places on her body once again.

The minutes seemed to pass in slow motion, as they remained fully interested in each other. And each of them wanting it to go on for many more, and to never end. Time stretched and he tightened his arms around her, pulling her closer towards him, trying to fed his craving. But it was never enough, and he wanted more of her.

He pushed this lips hard against hers, fighting and _fighting_ for more of her.

Lily, although wanting the moment to go on for a long time, quickly pulled away looking extremely embarrassed.

He groaned in displeasure, trying to pull her back towards him, but she took a large step away from him, towards the staircase, refusing to meet his gaze.

He had not heard his best mate come into the room, and it came as a huge surprise to him when someone cleared their throat behind him.

James whirled around to see Sirius standing in the threshold, holding a birthday present that they had forgotten to give Lily before hand. He raised his eyebrows at his fellow Marauder, trying to keep a strong composure.

Sirius made to speak, but James silenced raised one of his hands to silence him. Turning around, he expected to face Lily, slightly surprised to realize that she had managed to retreat up the staircase in utter silence.

Sighing he turned back around to face his best mate, trying and failing to not smile. "I don't know whether to congratulate you or lecture you," Sirius said, mirroring James' smile.

"And I'm debating on how exactly to murder you," James retorted, his smile faltering slightly as he glared at his best mate. "Since when do you not check the map?"

"Well," Sirius added, looking slightly embarrassed himself, "I never imagined to walk in on that,"

"It wasn't what you-" James interrupted, however Sirius instantly cut him off.

"You're shirtless, mate." Sirius concluded, nodding to James' shirt lying discarded on the side of the couch, "And well, all the clues are here. I mean, Lily was in such a disarray."

A blush grew on James' face and he put his shirt back on, causing Sirius to let out a bark of laughter. "First with you two this morning, and now with this." he muttered, through gasps of air, "This is rich!"

"Just leave that here," James responded motioning to the present in his hands, and running a hand through his hair. "Go back to your own common room,"

Sirius nodded, "I think I might just take this back with me," he confessed about the present in his hands. "It's never going to be as good as any present you'll give her."

"Won't you just shut up" he demanded, smirking ever so slightly as he leaned up against the side of the couch. "You're running this for me,"

"Oh nothing will ever ruin this for you," Sirius quipped, laughing to himself as he made his way towards portrait hole. "I'll leave you so you can go write it all down in your diary,"

"What? So you can read it later?"

"No need," he replied, "You're going to tell us all about it anyway."

Sirius pushed open the portrait hole, dropping the present on the floor, "Oh and Prongs," he said over his shoulder, "Congrats"

James only smiled in response, standing to an upright position and making his way quietly up the staircase towards his bedroom.


	27. Chapter 27

_**Friday, February 5th**_

Lily slipped into class just after the bell had rung, unfortunately for her the entire class had already all settled into her seat, and her entrance was noticed by everyone.

They all turned towards her, and although her Head of House would have previously scolded her for not being prompt, like a Head Girl must be, she paid no attention to her late entrance. Instead Professor McGonagall attacked the attention of the class once again and continued on with her lecture. As quickly as she could, Lily grabbed the only open seat in the class, at the back of the class room beside Sirius.

"You know," he stated as she took her seat, "People were initially pretty shocked when you walked into this class after Christmas break, and things would probably blow over if you bothered to arrive on time."

Lily raised her eyebrows, and chuckled to herself under her breath, "Well all be, if I had told sixth year Sirius Black that he would one day be scolding _me _for arriving late to class, he would have never believed me." she told him, and he stuck out his tongue in reply.

"Well, lucky for you McGonagall split the four of us up, so I'm all yours for two whole hours," Sirius whispered, unable to stop himself from smiling.

Lily glared at him, "What in the world did you four do now?" she demanded, a smile playing at her lips.

Sirius shrugged in reply, pretending to pay attention to their Professor, "We may or may not have been planning a small practical joke, to lighten up the mood around here, and she may or may not have overheard our conversation when she walked in," he admitted,

She nodded in understanding, "Okay, so McGonagall may or may not have split the four of you up to stop or at least delay the planning process."

"Exactly" he replied, copying down the notes that Lily had begun to take. "Why were you late anyway? You're never late for anything.."

"Does it really matter? I'm here now.." Lily answered, pulling out her wand and charming her quill to write automatically.

Sirius watched the quill slide gracefully across the paper, as Lily non-verbally told it what to write down. He nearly forgot their entire conversation, completely taken with her magic abilities; however, he quickly shook out of his stupor and responded to her. "What is it that you're hiding?" he demanded, catching her off guard, causing her quill to fall back onto the table as a result of her loss of concentration.

Sighing, she looked at him, "What makes you sure that I've got something to hide?"

He shrugged nonchalantly, "If you didn't, you wouldn't hesitate to tell me why you were late.."

"I was barely a minute late," she retorted, waving her wand once more and it continued to write.

"That's not an answer to my question," Sirius said, copying her actions and charming his quill to do the same; though, it failed to write anything down without him verbally saying it out loud.

"In my defense," she quipped, pulling out her Defense against the dark arts text book from her bags and proceeding to make notes on the chapters that had been assigned for homework. "You didn't ask me a question,"

He grabbed his pen out of thin air, and continued to take notes on the lecture manually, "I asked you two. Why were you late? and What are you hiding?" he returned, "Both of which you failed to answer.."

She did not make an immediate response, causing Sirius to look over towards her. He noticed that her pen continued to write as if it was actually living, that she was making quick notes on the defense chapters and was maintaining a conversation with him, all at once. "The thing I'm hiding from you is the reason I'm late," Lily answered, with a somewhat obvious tone.

"I gathered that, thanks" Sirius muttered under his breath, realizing that this was going to be harder than he had assumed.

As he made to question her further, the voice of his Professor caught his immediate attention as she addressed the pair of them, "Ms. Evan's" their Head of House sighed from the front of the class room, causing all the other students to turn in direction. "I did not authorize the use of magic in my classroom this morning-"

And even though she made to continue to lecture her, Lily cut her off, "Right," she interrupted, purposefully disrupting her concentration so the quill on her desk fell back to it's inanimate state, "I'm very sorry. It won't happen again Professor,"

Sighing, McGonagall turned back to the chalk board, not wishing to further scold the Head Girl as she had not been misusing magic.

Once her back was turned, Lily once again charmed her quill to keep writing, much to Sirius' surprise. "Merlin, Lily." he hissed, "Are you feeling alright?"

"What do you mean by that?"

Out of the corner of her eye, Lily saw as Sirius scribbled something down on a blank piece of parchment and then with a flick of his wand, it disappeared.

"I mean," he replied, turning towards her. "Late for class? Disobeying the rules? Doing homework last minute? It's not like you at all."

"I've been very busy," Lily answered, her temper short, "I've missed quite a lot of school, and Amos-" she instantly stopped talking, and continued on, praying that Sirius had heard nothing.

He had heard, and was quick to question her on it.

"Clearly, he doesn't think things are over between us," she stated, her quill falling onto her table as McGonagall turned to address the class. "He cornered me in the halls, and starting hollering at me for no good reason."

Once again Lily saw Sirius scramble to read something that had just appeared on the blank piece of parchment before it vanished, and he made for a reply. "What are you writing?" Lily inquired, unable to keep her curiosity at bay.

"I'm taking notes," Sirius answered, unconvincingly.

Lily scoffed, rolling her eyes and closing her defense text book. "No, really."

She picked up the blank parchment, flipping it over, noticing that although he kept writing on it, there were no traces of ink. "Besides," demanded Sirius, "How could you even notice what I was doing?"

Lily raised her eyebrows in response, handing him back the blank piece of parchment. "With everything that you were doing, the concentration all that requires, there's no way you could have been paying the slightest bit of attention to what I was doing,"

"I've developed my multitasking skills," she replied simply; though, Sirius didn't seem impressed by this.

"It's a bit creepy, dear" he told her,

She frowned at him, and went back to manually taking notes.

A few minutes later, a sentence appeared on the piece of parchment in front of Sirius and he made quick work of reading it and vanishing his own response.

Lily, who had been pretending to ignore him, had in turn been watching the piece of parchment out of the corner of her eye. It was only until she saw the message appear did the idea finally occur to her, "You're passing notes!" she whispered triumphantly under her breath.

Quickly she looked around the room and observed that Remus, James and Peter all had identical pieces of parchment on their tables as well. "When you write something on your parchment, it is magically transferred to theirs! Then vise versa!" she continued, "That's completely brilliant,"

Sirius smirked at her, "It was my idea," he said smugly, "Now, that you know the secret there's something I want in return. Well, an answer to something we're all wondering,"

She raised her eyebrows, and looked down at the piece of parchment, "What do you four want?" she hissed, looking back to her notes.

"What was it that Amos said?"

Lily gaze at him, displeased with the question, "I'm not going to answer that," she told him, going back to her note taking and vowing to ignore him for the remainder of the class, "If you really want to know you can ask him yourself."

The moment the words left her mouth she regretted them, even more so when Sirius' mouth twisted into a smirk. "As long as we have your permission," he muttered in reply, scrawling something down on the piece of parchment before going back to copying Lily's notes.

* * *

><p>Marlene joined Lily at the Gryffindor table in the dinning hall; nearly empty as dinner had finished an hour previous. "I've been looking for you; I thought you would've been in the library at this time.." Marlene started, taking the seat opposite to her best friend.<p>

Lily pushed aside the work she had been emmersed in, "Too many people have discovered the library; it's way too crowded these days, and way too loud for my preferance." she replied, pausing before speaking again to highlight the barely audible whispers in the Great Hall that evening, "It's much easier to get things done in here."

She smiled in return, "What do you think of Greg?" Marlene blurted out, catching Lily completely off guard.

"I honestly don't ever think of Greg" Lily replied, smirking ever so slighly as Marlene rolled her eyes.

"I want your opinion of him, Lily." Marlene told her sternly, "Whether you're willing to give it or not. I want to hear what you have to say."

Lily shrugged her shoulders, "He's very kind, although I've never actually had a full conversation with him, Benji Fenwick has always had wonderful things to say about him. He's a hard worker and seems to treat you right." she said, "I guess I approve?"

"I wasn't asking for your approval; but thank you for that." Marlene cut across, "Things are getting pretty serious between the two of us, and I just wanted to know if you were thinking that I was making a huge mistake."

"Honestly?" Lily asked,

Marlene nodded, "Honestly."

"I'm sure Gregory is an absolutely wonderful person; you two seem to make each other happy. But-"

She groaned in reply, "There's always a but"

"But-" Lily continued, ignoring Marlene's comments, "I think that you should be- that there's someone that you should end up with at the end of all this, for lack of a better word, sleeping around. I'm not going to name names because you know who I'm talking about. You were wrong a few months ago, and you're wrong now; he is perfect for you, and if there were such thing as soulmates-"

"Don't say it" Marlene interrupted, "He's not my soulmate; we're not meant to be together, we're not meant to have or be anything ever again."

"But why?" Lily half-winned, half-snapped.

"He broke my heart." Marlene's voice broke, and she took a few seconds, in which Lily was half certain that she was going to start to cry, to gather herself, "I gave him everything, I trusted him and he stomped all over me. I can't go through that again, I can't set myself up for another heart break again. I barely survived the last one, and I can't help but think that if he breaks my heart again, I'm not going to make it through. Personally, it's a risk I'm not willing to take."

Lily let out a sigh, dropping her voice to a whisper, "Where's your courage?"

"It was thrown off the top of the astronomy tower with your cigarette buds" she hissed back, getting to her feet and stalking off back down the Gryffindor table and out of the Great Hall; leaving Lily completely flustered, confused at how she could've been so careless as to let her best friend discover one of her darkest secrets.

* * *

><p>In the midst of writing her potions essay where she was challenged to write about a potion that would revolutionise modern wizarding society, there came a rushed knock on her door. Lily would've been surprised by the disturbance if she hadn't already heard three voices, arguing in hushed whispers, on their way up the stairs.<p>

"Come in" she sang, putting down her quill and turning to face the Marauder's as they walked into her room. She raised her eyebrows in fake shock, "Shouldn't you three be off causing trouble of some sort?"

They all shared a look before Remus answered, "We've actually just come from trouble,"

"What do I have to bail you three out of this time?" Lily demanded, heaving a great sigh and getting to her feet.

James put up his hands to stop her, "No, it's nothing like that. It wasn't that kind of trouble." he replied, "We just ran into a fellow student in the hall and had a lovely conversation, and came straight here to you to see if you had a third opinion"

"Well, technically hers would be a fifth opinion, Prongs" Sirius corrected, "Seeing as there are three of us and then Diggory"

Lily shook her head in false hope, "Please tell me you didn't confront Amos"

"You gave us permision," James and Sirius said in unison, although this did not comfort Lily.

Remus shrugged beside them, "I was dragged into the interrogation," he admitted, "You're allowed to have a personal life; these two believe differently or are really confused when it comes to the definition of a _personal _life."

Lily thanked him while he received glares from his two best mates. She retook her seat, "Alright, go on" she encouraged them, "Let's get this over with, shall we?"

"Wow," replied Sirius, crossing his arms, pretending to take offense at her tone, "You couldn't be less enthusiastic"

"Well, I'm sorry that I'm not exactly excited to discuss my personal life with all three of you." Lily quipped,

"No matter," Remus interrupted before Sirius could respond, "Can you really blame her, Padfoot?"

"I was making a joke," he said in defense, although no one seemed to be paying any attention.

Remus took a seat on the edge of her bed, "Well, Amos told us that he comfronted you about getting back together. He said that you hadn't given him an answer and were thinking about it."

"And you three are here to make sure that I don't plan on getting back together with him.." Lily added, trying to keep from rolling her eyes.

"Well" began James, "We've come up with a list of reasons, and if you're willing to hear them.."

"I'm pretty sure it's not going to matter what I want to hear or not because you three are going to list them anyway." she countered, observing the three in front of her, "You may as well just get on with it.."

"You're such a good sport, Evans" Sirius grinned, sitting himself on her three-drawer dresser, to which Lily didn't even bother protesting. "First of all, he's a prick"

"Second, he's a rubbish Quidditch player, Hufflepuff isn't going to stand a chance at the cup this year" James stated, holding himself up a little higher at the fact that the Gryffindor team was definitely going to win under his great leadership as it's captain.

"Hold on" Lily cut in, "If I'm going to have to listen to all of these reasons, you have to justify them and don't be wasting my time with arguments like how much food he can eat in one sitting or the grades he's getting in herbology; because I couldn't care less."

They each agree, and Remus continued, "Well, we believe that Amos Diggory is a prick because of the way he treats the people he cares least about; if he treated his enemies with respect than we would know for a fact that he would treat you or any other plausible girlfriend the same."

Lily nodded her head in agreement and ushered the three boys to continue, "He's not kind or thoughtful, he's playing you and everyone else." James added, "Diggory lives off of seeing other people in pain; he's vicious"

"Fifth : He goes out of his way to cause people pain." Sirius said, "On multiple occasions, he's gone out of his way to break couples up, to humiliate people; like Remus in forth year, when he dumbed pumpkin juice down the front of his trowsers."

"Thanks Padfoot, so much for keeping that a secret." Remus argued, "He spends most of his spare time in the library, charming sixth years"

"Neither of us like him," Sirius stated, after their arugments had begun to run dry. Lily raised her eyebrows in a way that ushered him to continue, as she wouldn't base her opinion off of who the Marauder's liked. Rightly so seeing as the three of them were disliked by many; if all of her friends were approved by the Marauder's, she would have very few.

"We don't even find him tolerable; and we wouldn't be able to spend any time with you if he was around. You know how much we love you, simply put: the Marauder's would slowly crumble into nothing without you; you've always been the voice of reason; the one to settle arguments. We need you to live.

Lily rolled her eyes, although couldn't help but feel a little flattered, "That was so over dramatic, Sirius; but duly noted"

"He has a huge habit of lying" Remus added, remembering back to the many nights he would be scedueled to do patrols with Amos Diggory and within the moments before they were set to start, he would develop some sort of mid-night head cold. "How can you expect to develop a healthy relationship with someone in which everything they say you're going to questioning?"

"He couldn't care less for your opinion," James emphasized, neglecting to mention that he finds her insight allurring and refreshing; quite mind-opening. "Or anything else you care about for that matter."

"He's dull" Sirius mentioned, "I understand that there are moments for being serious, it's in the name of course; but Diggory doesn't realize that there are moments to be a bit mischevious and crazy."

"Amos isn't your type" Remus concluded, "You need someone that's going to challenge every word you say, but who's going to still love you unconditionally. You need someone who knows what he has, who thinks of you as his world"

Silence fell over the group. Lily remained seated going over all the reasons they gave, although thought back to the few boys she's dated in the past and realized that none of them met all of those things; not even James. It was only in that moment did Lily notice how much hatred and frustration she held for that specific Marauder, only then did it hit her that all of the things that he had put her through made her lose complete faith in him. **  
><strong>

"Now don't you understand why we believe that it's in your best interest to not get back together with Diggory?" James asked, racking his brain for more reasons but failing, pulling her from her musings.

Lily remained silence, staring down at her feet. "Lily?" Sirius asked, hoping down from her dresser.

"I'm thinking." she replied, falling silent once more.

"You're thinking?" James demanded, "You actually have to think about your decision? He's a complete prick, Lily."

Her eyes met his and she got to her feet. "Can you two give us a second?" Lily asked, turning to Remus and Sirius, as they both took the hint and made fast work of exiting her bedroom and closing the door behind them.

"He's a horrible person, Lily" James continued, "You can't honestly be thinking about going back to him?"

"Well I am, because in some ways that you are to blinded by your hatred to see, he can be kind and down to earth. In some ways, he can be exactly what I'm looking for." She countered, hiding the hurt behind her voice.

"He wasn't there for you!" James hollered, unable to contain the thought anymore, "He doesn't deserve you because he wasn't there for you when you needed him the most; like a boyfriend should be."

"Well neither were you!" Lily cried in retort, "You hold yourself so much higher than him! You think that he's a horrible person because when my parents died he didn't care at all, but what you fail to realise for yourself is that you were so intent on ignoring me and being with Jessica that you weren't there either; I needed you and you weren't there."

Tears were forming in her eyes, "Don't you dare try and convince me that you're a better person that he is, because in my mind you're the same! I was strong, all the time, always helping you when you needed it. My boyfriend was bullying me, my sister hated me and kicked me out of her wedding, my parents died. I _needed _you"

"I didn't know that you were going through any of that," James pleaded, staring at her while tears streamed down her cheeks.

"You didn't ask, you couldn't care less." Lily countered, "Amos knew, of course he did, but what do you think is worse: knowing and not giving a damn, or not even caring enough to ask in the first place!

You were horrible to me, you flaunted your perfect relationship in front of me as a kind of sick joke; that you knew Amos was terrible to me and you knew that I was miserable with him. You neglected our friendship, our duties as a Head Boy and Girl, as a team. I can't tell you things anymore, because you left me, and that's why I've avoided sharing with you and with everyone else what happened while I was away; everybody leaves, so why am I wasting my time sharing personal things with them when in the end they'll be gone?"

"Lily, I thought we were okay, that all was forgiven.." James tried again. She wasn't yelling at him, but he prayed and wished that she had been.

"That's just more proof against you; proof that you simply don't care enough to ask. I'm not ready to forgive you, and I can't trust you anymore. You have no right, now more than ever, to be telling me who I should or shouldn't be dating."

"Please.." James begged, his voice barely audible, "What about the other night?"

"A moment of weakness; I was blinded by the past, and thought for a moment that you would never hurt me again. I was wrong." Lily muttered, turning her back. "Just leave."

He reached out and put his hand on her should in a final attempt, however she shrugged in off putting more space between them. He hung his head and pulled the door open to see both Remus and Sirius standing there completely shocked. James quickly pushed past them into his own room, closing and locking the door behind him.

"Lily?" Remus asked, poking his head into her room to see that she had taken a seat on her bed with her head in her hands and her knees pulled to her chest. She remained silent and he closed her bedroom door.

"We've got to find Marlene," Sirius whispered, "Then we'll come back and she'll talk to Lily, we'll talk to James, they'll fix this and get through it."

"I don't know, Padfoot" Remus muttered under his breath, starting down the stairs.

Sirius shook his head in disbelief, remaining hopeful, "It's just a matter of opening her eyes,"


	28. Chapter 28

_**Sunday, February 14th**_

"Marlene, get up out of bed!" Mary had shouted from the other side of the bathroom door, as Alice had already gone down to breakfast with Frank. "You're going to sleep away the whole day!"

"It's Sunday!" she hollered back, "I have the right to sleep in on a Sunday!"

Mary grabbed the nearest shampoo bottle, pulled open the door and launched it across the room in her direction. "Oi!" protested Marlene, rubbing the spot where the bottle had hit her, standing in the door way of the bathroom. "You didn't have to throw things" she stated, replacing the shampoo bottle on the edge of the bathtub.

"Are you coming down to breakfast with me?" Mary asked, "Should I wait?"

"Oh no," Marlene replied waving her hand in a hap hazardous way, "Go on ahead, I'll go down in a bit"

"Suite yourself," Mary said, shrugging her shoulders.

Marlene smiled, waving her out the door, "Tell those Ravenclaw kids you call friends I say hi," she added over her shoulder.

Mary returned her smile, but shook her head, "You know I'm not going to do that, they were never too fond of you"

"I figured," Marlene agreed, laughing with Mary as she walked out the door.

Nearly half an hour later, Marlene made her way out of their dormitory.

Slightly disappointing, arriving in the Great Hall, the only one of her friends she saw was Sirius. Sighing, she slowly made her way over towards him, finding no liable reason to not have to sit with him.

"Good morning" he greeted her as she took the seat across from him.

"Hi" she replied weakly, not looking forward to the conversation ahead.

They sat in silence as he continued to leaf through that mornings profit, appearing much older than he seemed as his brow furrowed upon reading about the latest killings. "You're going to fight, aren't you?" she whispered, fear rushing over her.

Sirius instantly tore his eyes away from the article he was reading to meet hers, "I don't have much choice. We can't go on living like this, letting these horrible people take what is ours. They will murder every blood traitor, every beast, every piece of scum. None of us really stand a chance."

"People are dying." Marlene told him, as if he already didn't know, "If you fight, you'll be among them."

"Rather die fighting then live in this world," he countered, "Besides, I'm not going to die."

He was smug, looking as if he was keeping some grand secret on how he was going to survive through the fighting, "I've got a reason to stay, I've got a reason to stay alive."

Marlene couldn't help but smile, "Well then what, may I ask, is this great reason?" she demanded,

Sirius simply stared at her in reply, looking her dead in the eyes, remaining silent because he knew she already had the answer. He dropped his gaze moments later, picking up the profit once more. "Do you and Andrews have any plans then? For today?" he asked, although Marlene knew he would rather not know.

"He's a good guy, you know" she stated, ignoring his question.

He shrugged and replied, "I never said he wasn't"

"Yes but it was implied," Marlene quipped back, crossing her arms over her chest.

Sirius sighed irritably, putting the paper down with a little too much force, "And _what _was it that I implied?" he snapped.

"That I could do better than Greg!" she added, however he was quick to respond, rounding on her.

"Because you could!" he emphasized, loud enough that multiple other students in the Great Hall turned too look in his direction for the source of the disruption.

Marlene rolled her eyes, having fought the same fight before, "With who?" she hissed back, "Because you definitely can't mean yourself!"

She had gone too far and pushed him over the edge. Sirius sat in front of her, his face flashed with hurt although was quickly replaced with fury that Marlene had thought she must have imagined his pain.

He frowned and stood from the table, leaving her without another word.

* * *

><p>Lily approached her table in the back of the library, pleased and not the least bit surprised to see it already occupied by one. She shifted the books from under her arm and placed them down on the desk, "You know that this has always been my table?" she reminded Remus; he looked up and smiled wittingly. "I'm kidding of course; always room for friends at my table"<p>

"I figured you wouldn't mind me using it since you've barely been in here these past few weeks," Remus added, marking the page in his book and closing it as Lily took the seat across from him.

She smiled, "With a private common room, that's rarely occupied, I've got all the silence I need to get my work done." Lily boasted. "And if you needed it, you're always welcome there as well."

"Thanks." He said, his gaze drifting to something behind Lily, "But, I rather enjoy working in the library; it gives me a space to observe."

She glanced over her shoulder, and caught the eye of an old friend. Her heart dropped in her chest, and she turned back towards Remus; however, before she could say anything, he spoke. "It's nothing."

"Well of course it's something," she countered, grabbing his hand from across the table.

He shook his head, swiping his hand away, "No. It's really nothing, because it can't be anything. Not anymore."

Lily hung her head, "I feel responsible." she muttered, "When I told you to tell her, I had no idea what it would unravel. I swear, I-"

"It's not your fault," Remus interrupted, "I should have told her earlier, before we got too deep into things. Before things were said; things were done."

"I didn't know you still felt that way about her," Lily started, picking up her head only long enough to see Remus staring over her shoulder at the girl behind her.

He shook his head in disbelief, "I didn't either to be honest." He concluded, dropping his gaze to his lap, before returning it to look back at Lily. "That's the thing about pain; it arises from so deep inside that you weren't aware in the slightest that it existed. Though, the second you realize it's there, everything makes sense; and you notice that it could never have been anything else, that you must have been daft not to have seen it before.

Pain is always there, even when you've pushed it so deep down inside of you."

"It get's better though," He added, taking on a happier tone.

Lily shook her head, "No." she replied, "_It_ doesn't get better. _You _get better. You get stronger and wiser, and things don't hurt anymore."

He nodded his head in agreement, "I suppose you're right,"

Lily smiled and waiting until Remus returned her expression, before getting to her feet. "I'm going to head back to the common room. Do you want to come?"

"No thanks," he replied, opening his textbook once more, "I'm going to stay here for a little while longer."

"Alright, well if you're sure," Lily said, picking up the books off the table, planning to drop them off at the book return. "I'm going to look for Sirius, would you have any idea of where he might be?"

"Checking the common room would be your best bet" he answered, going back to his work.

Lily patted him on the shoulder before making her way out of the library.

* * *

><p>Amos Diggory rounded the corner to finally find who he had set out looking for that afternoon, "Oi, Lily!" he shouted, jogging down the hall to catch up with her, "Wait up for a second, won't you?"<p>

She inwardly sighed, stopping in her tracks and turning around to face him, "Amos please," she nearly begged, "Not today, just not today"

"Oh come on Lily," he stated, coming to her side, "I just want to chat. After you had the Marauder's come after me a few weeks ago I got the impression that you never wanted to speak to me again. Hopefully that was just my mind playing tricks on me, being over analytical, like always."

"I would hate for you to get that impression," she replied dryly, although Amos wasn't too quick to pick up on her tone and flashed her a forgiving smile.

He took the books she had been holding out of her arms, "Good." he answered, "Because I was really hoping we could pick up where we left off before you got all emotional,"

Lily frowned, her brow furrowing, "Are you serious?" she demanded, sharply taking her books back from him. "Do you honestly think that I want to get back together with you? After what you put me through?"

"Oh, but sweetheart-"

"Don't call me sweetheart" she interrupted, however Amos was quick to ignore her,

"-you know that I didn't mean for you to get so upset. I was just doing what I thought was best for you. Lily, you can't honestly think that this was all my fault when you're the one that completely overreacted about the entire situation."

"My parents had just died!" Lily hollered back in reply, "And you were no where near sympathetic to that,"

He rolled his eyes, "Oh of course you would play that card, _my parents had just died. _You said you fought with them all the time, didn't they hate you anyway? What does it matter that they're gone now?"

"Stop it" she warned, her hand drifting dangerously close to her wand that was stowed in the pocket of her robes.

Amos raised his eyebrows, "What? Are you going to call Potter and Black, so they can come and fight your battles for you. Are you scared because when you were away Death Eater's tortured poor wittle Evans, and now she needs two wizards to protect her."

"How do you-"

"How do I know?" he finished for her, a smirk growing on his face, "My dad works very closely with a few of the Aurors that had to deal with you over the last few months. Of course they told him everything, and of course he relayed the information back to me. Poor Lily Evans, you know why you can't remember certain details from that night? Do you want to know what it is that Madame Pomfrey, Dumbledore and the Aurors are hiding from you?"

She made to walk away but he grabbed her arm, "Well, if you really want to know, I could tell you of course. I would want something in return, but it's nothing that we haven't done before."

"You disgust me" Lily hissed back in reply, wrenching her arm from his grasp, "Don't ever talk to me, if I ever see you again I will hex you so badly that you'll be in the hospital wing until graduation. That's a promise."

"You won't do that" he replied confidently.

She glared up at him, her hand in her pocket gripping her wand tightly. "How can you be so sure?"

"Because if you do I'll be sure to tell everyone anything and everything I know-"

"That sure as hell isn't a lot" Lily muttered, although was ignored once again,

"-about you're little adventures, about you and Potter, your smoking and your constant rule breaking. What will the school do knowing that their Head Girl has acted in such a horrible way?" Amos demanded, "I think that McGonagall will be forced to take away your badge, maybe even expel you."

"You need to stay out of my life!" she shouted, trying to step around him though he blocked her path.

He smirked down at her, "What?" he asked greedily, "No kiss goodbye? You have a reputation to uphold. No one would be happy to hear about the new side to their Head Girl."

Lily pushed passed him with all her force, using the side of her shoulder to knock him slightly off balance. In the free opportunity, she took off down the hall way. Although, just as she was about to turn the corner, she was hit with a body-binding curse and instantly fell to the ground.

"You don't want to throw your life away," Amos warned approaching her, holding his wand at his side. "We could be great you and me. Forget about Potter. He's a bully and half the man I am, you deserve better than him, you deserve me."

"I'd rather Potter than you any day. He would never be so violent," she countered, gazing up at him from the cold stone floor.

Amos grew red with anger, "I'll give you to the end of tomorrow to make your decision. Take me and your perfect reputation is saved, but pick Potter and risk everything you've ever cared about."

"I don't need until tomorrow." Lily replied firmly, "The answer is no. My reputation means nothing, I'm more worried about my character."

He laughed bitterly in reply, "We'll just see about that then, shall we?" muttering under his breath, before raising his wand and flicking it once more in her direction.

Instantly, something felt wrong as the corridor began to spin and pain crept up through her legs to her head. Lily could vaguely hear Amos' retreating footsteps, and her body-binding curse was lifted as soon as she knew he was out of her range.

Her head felt heavy and she used the wall for support in the process of getting to her feet. She was sure he had only hexed her, but usually it wouldn't affect her that badly. Using the wall, she walked as fast as she could to the hospital wing, and could feel her memory of the last few minutes with Amos slipping through her fingers. The halls continued to spin, and everything when black just as she pushed open the doors to the infirmary.

* * *

><p>Remus walked along side Sirius as he continued to mumble angrily under his breath, "Forget her, I don't need her." Sirius admitted, shoving his heads into his pockets, "She can go on and be with Andrews, see if I care."<p>

"I think you've made it plainly obvious that you do care," Remus countered, patting his best mate on the shoulder.

"And she made it plainly obvious that she didn't." Sirius pointed out, having recounted the exact story to Remus about his _delightful _conversation with Marlene that morning.

Remus sighed in response, having witnessed many arguments of theirs before. "You know that she'll come around." he reassured him, "She always does."

"Don't give me that" Sirius hissed, kicking at the asphalt of the courtyard. "I'm tired of hearing that line. It's been so over used that it's completely worn out. It truly means nothing anymore."

Remus stopped in his tracks, throwing up his hands in defeat. "Fine!" he agreed, "If you want me to tell you what I really think then I will."

Quickly, Sirius took a seat on the nearest bench, a gesture that ushered his best mate to continue on, "I've never in my life seen you try this hard to get a bird back, and I've not the only one that's noticed. Prongs, Lily, even Pete has seen the change in you, and I promise you Marlene has seen it as well. You will get her back, I'm sure of it."

"Thanks-"

"I'm not finished," Remus interrupted, "You will get her back, but it's not helping you to sit around moping and complaining about it. So, Marlene's being a little stubborn about the whole issue; what else is new? If you really want her back, if you want her to give up on Andrews then you're going to have to get up and get moving."

"Stop thinking like a bloke," he concluded, "And start thinking like a Marauder!"

* * *

><p>"Ms. Evans" Madame Pomfrey inquired, "Whats the last thing you remember?"<p>

Truthfully, the last thing she remembered was smoking on top of the astronomy tower the past night with Sirius, although unwilling to relay that information to the Healer, Lily lied, "The last thing I remember is going to bed last night. How long have I been here?"

"Nearly three hours," the Healer replied, looking slightly skeptical at Lily's answer, "Do you remember anything from this morning? What you had for breakfast perhaps?"

Lily tried and failed to recall what she had been doing earlier that morning.

"Alright Ms. Evans" she continued, making a few scribbles down on her clipboard before tucking it under her arm, "You will stay in the Hospital Wing for three to five days, depending on how you progress."

"I can't. I've already missed so much of my classes," Lily countered.

The Healer would not hear it, "The more you rest, the sooner you'll be out of here." Madame Pomfrey stated, handing her a cup filled with a medical potion she had summound with a wave of her wand.

Lily drank it quickly, wincing as it dripped down her throat, and slowly her eyes felt heavier until she was fast asleep.

* * *

><p>"Oi! Andrews!" Sirius yelled, having left Remus in mid thought and grabbed the Marauder's map to find where their Gryffindor Keeper was. "Can I have a word?"<p>

Gregory didn't look entire too pleased to see his girlfriends ex-boyfriend, however agreed. "Yeah, sure." he replied, "Although I'm meeting up with Marlene in a few minutes."

Sirius shuffled nervously, "That's actually what I wanted to talk with you about," he began, "I need to ask you a very big favor, and although you don't owe me anything I was really hoping that you would let me have this one."

"Go on then, Black." Andrews said, glaring at him "What do you want?"

"I need you to break up with Marlene," he admitted, "Well, I'm asking you politely to break up with her,"

Greg crossed his arms defensively, "And why on earth would I do that? Surely, you had your chance, and you messed it up." he argued, "You can't just expect me to give her up now that you've suddenly decided you want her back"

"I thought you would say that" Sirius explained, having already prepared his counter argument, "You know who I was, I developed a reputation for myself that I'm not very proud of. It was common knowledge that I dated and was with a lot of birds, to say the least, I really liked the attention and felt I had to impress people. So I did, and when I first dated Marlene, she was exactly like all the others and I could see things ending the exact same way as the others had ended."

"But after we had broken up, she had changed me ever so slightly and left a mark on me. Now, as a result of her, I'm a completely different person, and whether the population of Hogwarts refuses to see and admit that is not in my control. The thing is Greg, she's not just another bird anymore. I've change so much because of her and every single time we spoke she left a bigger and bigger mark on me. Marlene is a part of me, she lives in my heart and I'm not just saying all this because I'm infatuated with her, it's much more than that now. I love her, I told her everything and with the war, well it just seemed to be effecting me a lot more than most people and Marlene understood that. Then, in a moment of weakness, I lost her."

"You cheated-"

"I didn't though. Everyone else started that rumor and because the old Sirius would've done it, she believed it, forgetting completely how I had changed. I let her slip through my fingers and ever since that night I have been trying to get her back, but she refuses to talk to me or here me out. That day was the worst day of my life, my biggest regret because now she's falling in love with another bloke and I have to sit idly by and watch it happen. I can't even begin to describe to you the pain that I feel when I see you with her, and unless you've had to live through a similar situation, you will never truly understand.

And I don't know how you feel about her, or how she feels about you. I have no idea if your relationship is good or bad. All I know is that a part of her will always belong to me, because I've seen her at her most vulnerable and she's shared with me things that she probably won't ever say again. A part of her heart will always be mine, and mine will always be hers. Whenever other birds come up to me, all I do is compare them to her, and they never come close to being as good."

"I miss her so much, Andrews, I don't even- I can't even begin to explain it. I miss her heart beat against my chest, and her soft slow breathing when she fell asleep in my arms. I miss her laughter and her smile, and I once made her a promise that I would always be around to make her laugh and smile; it makes me sad that I haven't been able to keep that promise. She's my world, Marlene is my soul mate, and whether or not you believe that rubbish doesn't make a difference because you can't deny the fact that she belongs with me. She'll always be mine, even if you marry her, she'll be mine."

"Now, if you truly believe that you love her as strongly as I do, then please, don't let what I've just confessed ruin your relationship. In the end I just want her to be happy, and even if I die an old bitter man without her, knowing she was happy will be good enough. Although, if you know for a fact that what I've been saying in the truth, and that you know that your feelings for her will never match mine, then I beg you to please give her back to me. She's truly my soul mate and I know, deep down inside of my heart, that I should be spending the rest of my life with her."

Sirius took a deep breath and instantly dropped his gaze to his feet, waiting for the Gryffindor Keeper to respond. He didn't respond right away, and it scared Sirius to think that he wouldn't respond at all.

"I can't do it, mate" Greg finally admitted, "She's brilliant and I just can't give her up."

Sirius drew a shakey breath, "Yeah," he expressed, gathering himself to play the devastating response as if it was nothing to him. "Don't worry about it, Andrews. I lost my chance, I get it. Sometimes there are things we just can't control."

"I'm sorry, Black" Andrews admitted, "I really am."

Sirius shook his head, as if to dismiss the apology and turned his back. "Thanks for considering it, mate" he said over his shoulder, before ducking into one of the secret passage ways and pulling out the Marauder's map, making his way down to the Hospital Wing in hopes of talking to Lily.

When he arrived he was surprised to see her lying in on of the beds, sleeping soundly. He looked around for Madame Pomfrey, and upon seeing the time realized she would be down at dinner with the rest of the students and staff. Quietly, he crept over to the bed where she lay and sat down next to her.

Not wishing to wake her, he was slightly nervous when she stirred beside him. Lily's eyes fluttered open, and she smiled slightly upon seeing him. "Good evening," he wished her, as she came around.

"Hey there," she muttered back in reply, "What are you doing up here?"

"I think I'd better be asking you that," he countered, and she rubbed her head as if having forgotten.

Lily's smiled faded, "I can't remember," she replied, "Woke up here this morning, shortly after breakfast I'm assuming and Madame Pomfrey was asking me all these serious questions, and spoke to Dumbledore. I think there's something wrong with me, Sirius."

"There's nothing wrong with you," He countered, in a way of reflex.

She patted the bed, and he sat down next to her. "There is something though, I can't remember what happened and that scares me." she answered, "Forget about it though, we need to talk about something else, I don't think I can talk about what happened while I was away just yet."

Sirius agreed and then proceeded to tell her about his morning; his conversation with Marlene and then with Remus; how he was later convinced to confront Greg about his relationship with Marlene.

Lily didn't say anything for a while, and he was soon lost in thought of Marlene.

"It sucks doesn't it?" Lily had whispered to him, and in all truth he hadn't even noticed that she had been talking to him.

Reluctantly he pulled his mind from his thoughts and directed his attention towards the Head girl, "What are you on about?" he asked, looking around the room to see if anyone else had entered.

"Being the second choice," she finished, moving ever so slightly to give him more sitting space. "Second best, well, it really sucks."

He made to disagree, and to defend himself, however her words began to sink in and he realized how much truth they held. It really did suck, and there was no other way to describe it.

"I was second best to," she cleared her throat and glanced around the room like he had previously done, "well, to your best mate. And it sucked."

Sirius still remained silent, hoping that she would just stop talking, but Lily continued on, "But the difference between you and me is that I was stuck with being the second choice, the loser. You, however, have recently tipped the odds generously in your favor."

"What are you talking about?" he demanded, suddenly feeling slightly hopeful.

"She told me that you kissed her," Lily bluntly admitted, and rolled her eyes when Sirius appeared slightly shocked, "But she also indirectly told me that, well she didn't do anything to stop you. She's remembering you, not that she forgot you, I mean she always knew you were here, but she's remembering _you. _How you made her feel, how you made things better, everything. You and her are perfect together and she's remembering that, which is driving a wedge right between her and Andrew."

"Lily," Sirius began, "If this is some kind of joke.."

"It's not." she assured him, "I'm her best friend, It's my job to know these things, even if she hasn't told me."

"But why are you telling me all this then?" he whispered,

She shrugged in reply, "I guess I've just always been a big fan of you and her. I want the best for each of you, and it turns out the best thing is for you to be together, so I'm giving you a little advantage, helping tip the scales in your favor."

"You know," Sirius stated, "About, you know who"

Lily shook her head, "Don't start with me," she replied, "Just because I've done something nice, does not mean I was expecting something in return. You know he wouldn't want you telling me anything, besides, I don't think there's a lot of hope left for us"

"There's all the hope in the world," he muttered under his breath, and whether Lily heard him or not, she chose not to acknowledge the comment. They stopped talking and outside of the doors they could hear the familiar voices of the fellow Marauder's. Sirius moved instinctively off the bed and back to the chair he had pulled over, just as the doors burst open.

Sirius noticed that Lily looked genuinely happy upon seeing his best mate; James was always the one to make her smile reach her eyes, and laugh loud enough to fill the entire room they were in. She had spoken to him as though she had given up, but the way she always leaned on him ever so slightly, and the way she subtly batted her eye lashes. Everything she was doing made it seem like she was no where close to losing hope.

"What the hell are these?" James demanded, Remus following close behind, looking equally as angry.

In his hands he was holding an empty pack of Lily's cigarettes. "Where the hell did you get those?" she retorted, making eye contact with Sirius.

"I found them" he replied, "They were in the pocket of your cloak"

She raised her eyebrows, "You went through my things!" she hissed, sitting up in the Hospital Wing bed. "You have no right to go through my things!"

"Technically he wasn't going through them," Remus defended, "We were just hanging in the Head's common room; James went to move your cloak and they fell out on to the ground."

"Jesus Evans," Sirius muttered under his breath so only Lily could hear him, "Could you have been less careful.."

She glared at him in response, and having noticed the exchange James rounded on him instead. "Did you know about this?" he shouted, causing Madame Pomfrey to poke her head out of her office to make sure everything was alright; however, upon noticing who was making all the noise, she returned to her work, closing the door behind her.

Sirius shuffled his feet, looking over James's shoulder instead of directly at him. As good of a liar he made everyone believe he was, James was able to tell he wasn't telling the truth from a mile away. "I might have known," Sirius whispered under his breath, Remus placing himself between the two friends to be sure nothing would happen.

James immediately thought back to all the moments he had spotted Sirius with Lily out on the grounds of Hogwarts or sitting at the top of the Astronomy tower on their map, thinking to himself that it was good that they were becoming closer friends. He realized then that in all those moments they had been smoking together; Sirius was prone to have a smoke every few weeks or when something remotely related to his family happened, there was no doubt in James' mind that he had gotten her started on the horrible habit.

"Don't you know how bad these things are for you?!" James scolded both of them, "Even as wizards we don't have a cure for the horrible illness these things cause. In this world, as same as in the muggle world, you smoke and you die. How could you be so careless! Gambling your lives away like this!"

"You don't understand, _Potter_" Lily stated, swinging her legs around the side of her bed and standing to meet him. She swayed slightly on her feet, and Remus grabbed her elbow to support her, holding onto it as she shouted her replies. "That's how its been with you recently; you refuse to understand or even take the time to even consider how other people are feeling. So, it seems to me that the question isn't how could Sirius and I be so careless, but instead, how could you be so careless? You gamble away your friendships and your relationships because you refuse to take a moment to put yourself in someone else's shoes."

"I want to be able to look past this new flaw in your personality, and I might have been able to if you had taken one moment to realize that maybe I wasn't smoking because I thought it was cool. There's a hole inside my chest where my family was, and it's empty now because I don't have a family anymore. There's nothing for me in the muggle world, and I'm despised in the wizarding world." Lily's voice was reduced to a barely audible whisper, "I don't belong anywhere, so when Sirius came along and expressed similar feelings, this antidote brought us together."

"How sad it must be for you to find an antidote that is only going to end up killing you." James hissed under his breath, coming very close to sounding sympathetic, but in these situations his anger always seemed to get the best of him.

"Lily.." Remus said, his voice breaking, feeling rather guilty for having no even realized that she was upset. His grip tightened on her forearm, holding on to her as if she was slipping through his fingers. "I'm so-"

"I know" she interrupted, looking down at the floor to avoid having to face either one of the three Marauder's.

Madame Pomfrey had poked her head back out into the main wing and had been absolutely appalled to see that Lily Evan's had left her bed. Frustrated she stormed over towards the seventh years and crossed her arms over her chest, "Ms. Evan's you will return to your bed," she said sternly, pointing to the place in question, "And the three of you will leave this instant, as you all clearly do not understand the severity of Ms. Evans health at the moment. You may return with my permission only in a few hours after she has rested."


	29. Chapter 29

_**Saturday, February 27th**_

Marlene and Remus sat together in silence in the Great Hall, as she chewed nervously at the food on the end of her fork as he shook his leg under the table. "This is it" he sighed, glancing up at the ceiling of the Great Hall, as it mimicked the weather outside.

"Dammit" Marlene hissed in reply, "Where is everyone else? James calmness is always contagious."

Just as Marlene and Remus began to worry about the rest of the team, they saw a few other members of the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Their seeker, Peter Johnson, and chaser, Hallie Bloomsburry were quickly making their way over towards where they were seated. "Beautiful flying weather outside!" Hallie exclaimed, sliding into the seat next to Remus so they could go over their maneuvers.

"Hallie and I ran into each other on the way down here and decided to step outside for a few minutes." Peter continued, loading his breakfast on to his plate "There's a slight wind that we should watch out for, but otherwise I think it's going to be a pretty good match."

"Have you seen the others?" Marlene demanded, "We can't play the game with just us four,"

Peter raised his eyebrows in her direction, offering a shrug in reply. Hallie and Remus have begun to review some of the strategies James had outlined for them last practice, levitating certain objects with their wands to simulate the Quidditch game. Over come with nerves, Marlene placed her forehead on the table, closing her eyes tightly, trying to calm herself before they had to head down to the pitch.

A few minutes later, she heard multiple forks hit the table and their captain scold Remus and Hallie for potentially giving away their new strategies. He sat down next to her and placed a hand on her back momentarily. Slowly Marlene lifted her head in response to face him, "How's it going?" James asked, devoting his full attention to her.

"How do you think it's going?" she hissed back in reply, running a shaky hand through her hair. "I hate this part.."

James repressed a smile, "You always had the worst nerves out of all of us," he noted, "But when it comes to game time you're always ready to go; I can always count on that from you."

Marlene smirked slightly, "Thanks for taking the pressure off," she mumbled sarcastically, asking where Sirius and Gregory were.

"They're on their way in," James said, dismissing the topic all together, "I was thinking about heading down to the pitch a little bit early to test out the weather conditions. I'll probably do a few laps, would you care to join me?"

He got to his feet, waving at the rest of the team and reminding them to eat well before they headed down to the pitch. Marlene glanced around for any sight of her boyfriend, but quickly abandoned her idea of finding him and followed James out of the Great Hall.

"So, do you know if Lily is going to make it down for the game?" he asked as they grabbed their brooms and made their way out of the equipment room.

Marlene smiled to herself, "Is that why you asked me down here earlier? So you could ask me questions about Lily in private?" she asked, mounting her broom and taking off into the air.

James quickly followed her, catching up very fast, "That's not the only reason, I also figured it would help calm your nerves." he argued, dropping his speed so they could talk normally. "But answer the question."

"She went to the Hospital Wing this morning for a small check up and I haven't seen her since; although last time I spoke with her, she was planning to make it down in time for the match." Marlene replied, taking her hands off her broom and stretching her arms out. "But you can never be too sure with her."

"Lily hasn't really spoken to me in weeks, ever since- well you know what I mean" James continued, absentmindedly, "I just really don't understand what's going on between us."

Marlene shrugged, "You should probably just talk to her." she stated, "There's nothing wrong with that."

He nodded, making his descent towards the equipment room, Marlene following behind him. Once he touched the ground he turned to face her, "Speaking of which, have you spoken with Sirius recently?"

She shook her head in reply, throwing her broom down to the ground and sitting beside it. "Things aren't the same between us anymore. Ever since I've started snogging Gregory, he's been extremely weird." Marlene started, "I figured that he would be the first to move on after we broke up, but he hasn't been with another girl since. So naturally I feel like crap whenever I see him because we haven't been keeping a relationship a secret, so the entire school is buzzing with the idea that I was cheating on him, or broke up with him to be with Greg.."

"Has he really not snogged anyone else since you?" James asked, extremely surprised, realizing then how different his best friend had been asking. Instantly, he felt a pang of guilt from having not talked with his best friend in a while. James had been so completely wrapped up in his own world of Quidditch, Head-duties and Lily to even pay the slightest bit of attention to Sirius.

"He hasn't" Marlene confirmed, "Otherwise we definitely would have heard about it through the Hogwarts grape vine. Secrets are never kept for very long in these halls."

James smiled, grabbing the box of Quidditch balls from the equipment room and sending a bludger lose, throwing Marlene a bat. "You practice for a bit," he told her, "I'm going to run back up to the Great Hall and get the rest of the team. If you see people coming just pack these things up and head to the change rooms; we'll all meet you there"

He grabbed his broom and flew beyond the pitch towards the entrance to Hogwarts, leaving Marlene behind. As he landed, he saw Remus pointing his wand at Sirius' bloody nose. "What happened?" he demanded, marching over towards his best mates, suddenly nervous about their Quidditch match.

"It was nothing," Sirius answered casually, with a tone way to calm after having been punched in the face. "Gregory and I just made an agreement of sorts"

James looked to Remus for help, completely lost. "Sirius has been trying to convince Greg of how he feels about Marlene; he's trying to get her back." Remus started, concentrating on cleaning the blood from his mates face with his healing charm. "The agreement, as I understand, that if Gregory could punch Sirius in the face as hard as he can, then he would break things off with Marlene."

"And me" interrupted Sirius, "Being the charming and gallant man that I am, told him that he could. Heck of a right hook though, almost took off my nose."

"Alright" murmured Remus, lowering his wand and stowing it in his Quidditch robes. "You're all fixed up for the match, but you should head to Madame Pomfrey after just to be sure."

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Now that Flower's out of the wing I don't see much of a reason to going back up there." he said, making his way down towards the pitch, chuckling to himself. "I heard that she's coming to the game as well"

"Oh yeah?" James asked, "Who did you hear that from?"

"She told me about ten minutes ago, showed up for breakfast shortly after you and Marlene left." Sirius replied, "Honestly, I doubt she really cares about the game, I think she's just happy to be able to come outside and enjoy the warming weather."

"I'm sorry that I've been kind of a rubbish mate lately," James blurted out to Sirius and Remus, wishing that Peter was there as well so he wouldn't have to repeat the same apology. "I just-"

"Prongs" Remus interrupted "We get it. Things are confusing, you don't have to explain anything to us."

"We forgive you for being your arrogant-toe rag self" Sirius added, dismissing the topic and jogging on to the pitch towards the change rooms, "Now let's go win us a Quidditch match."

* * *

><p>"Lupin with the quaffle" Amelia Jordan, sixth year, announces into the microphone; her voice echoing to the ears of everyone in the stands. "Bludger headed right for him, oh but quickly deflected by Black."<p>

"He's headed for the goal posts, both Beaters following him closely behind with his fellow Chasers by his sides. He raises the Quaffle, Diggory moves, big mistake, Lupin passes to Bloomsburry and she makes the shot!" she practically screams into the microphone, "That's 120 to 330, hopefully Gryffindor keeps it up otherwise they stand very little chance at a place for the cup."

"Quickly the Quaffle is back in play, Stone, Taylor and work together, weaving through each Gryffindor player, while Scotsmen and redirect every bludger back towards the Gryffindor players. The Quaffle is thrown and Andrews doesn't stand a chance as it goes sailing through the middle hoop. It's 120-140"

"With the ball to Gryffindor, Potter calls a time out." she states, "I heard that on a match like this one, if you get close enough to Potter you can see the veins popping out of his head. Now I really wouldn't want to be a player on the Gryffindor team right about now. They head to the change rooms, and the game will continue in a few minutes. While we wait for the Gryffindor team to pull themselves together, let's recap the best moments of today's game so far"

Amelia's voice faded into the background with the closing of the change-room door. The Gryffindor team all took their usual seats and James sat down as well. In this situation, he wasn't any greater than the rest of his team. James was not the star player, he had not scored most of their points, although much like the rest of his team, the result of the game depends on how the next few minutes play out.

James ran a hand through his hair, and the only sound for a few minutes was the heavy panting of his team. "I've been saying from the very start that we have to win this, that every game will be driven by the Gryffindor team and won by them as well. It was horrible of me to put that kind of pressure on you, and for that I'm very sorry. Marlene," James said, turning towards her, "You're letting your fear of losing to keep you from playing your best, the Hufflepuff beaters shouldn't have been able to deflect your hits so easily."

"Sirius" he continued, "Focus on the game. You've got a lot on your mind, I understand that, but nothing matters more in this moment than how this game plays out because you and I both know that the story has a much better ending if we can call ourselves victorious. Remus, play the game, don't focus so much on strategy and maneuvers, it's killing you mate."

"Hallie, you're new, don't let them use that to their advantage. You're a brilliant player, now prove it to them" he added, turning to his keeper, "Greg, do not guess. You're guessing at where you think the ball is going to go. We've been over this, you have to feel it. You know that Bones always fakes left and shoots right but he's played you for a fool 10 times now. Don't think, feel."

"And please, god please." James begged, bending his knees in a slight prayer, "Peter Johnson catch the damn snitch only if we'll win, if you see it and we're too far behind you pull your tricks and make sure that Gold doesn't catch it. Wait for the prime opportunity."

"Stop playing as individuals. Play as a team, because as a team we're unbeatable." James concluded, taking a deep breath before continuing, "Now do me.."

The team flashed each other glances, and the warning whistle blew. "We can do this" Hallie shouted, getting to her feet and leading the others towards the pitch, "We're not losing, it's not happening."

Sirius hung back slightly, patting his best mate on the shoulder, "She's out there watching mate." he told him, "Second row from the top, not her usual spot, but she is there. Stop scanning the stands and help Moony and Hallie. Let's win this thing as a team."

The team made their way back on to the field; met with a loud chorus of cheers as they all mounted their broom sticks once more. The team looked even more confident then they had going in to the time out. James scanned the stands, looking in the exact place Sirius had told him, and spotted Lily. She was seated in between Alice and Benji Fenwick, laughing at something he had just said.

"What do you image he tells them?" Benji asked Frank, sitting on Alice's other side, as the girls continued to laugh.

He shrugged in reply, "Must be some heck of a pep-talk because they always somehow manage to pull themselves together..." he replied, observing each player.

"He probably just threatens them... I can see it now." Benji mused, proceeding to put on his best impression of the captain, "If you don't win this game, I will curse you all to next week! My team always wins! Get your act together!"

Frank snickered as Benji went on, "Honestly, he's a complete bully. Don't you remember how he used to prance, he used to bowl over first years walking through the hall because he believed he was so much more important. The only reason Lupin, Black and Petigrew hang around him is that he's probably blackmailing them; I couldn't see why someone like him would have friends otherwise."

Lily had stopped listening to what Alice was telling her, distracted by the boys conversation. "Stop" she demanded, catching Alice off guard as she turned towards the boys. "You know he's not like that anymore."

"Oh?" Benji began, raising his eyebrows, "Strike a nerve, did we?"

"I have a problem with you being a twat" Lily replied.

"No" he corrected, "You have a problem with me bashing on your boyfriend"

Her frustration grew as she said, for what felt like the millionth time, "Potter is not my boyfriend"

"Really?" he demanded, ignoring Frank's concerns to just let it go, "Because the way you two act around each other says something completely different."

"I haven't spoken to Potter in weeks,"

"Wait!" Alice interrupted, "Why? What in the world are you two fighting about now?"

Lily simply shrugged as if to signal to her best friend that the middle of a Quidditch game wasn't the place to talk about her relationship with James Potter. The boys, however, were not going to drop the subject that easily.

"Don't you understand, Alice." Benji added, "It's a lovers quarrel, how are we supposed to understand."

The crowd cheered as the game continued. "Come on Benji," Frank cut him off, "Let's just watch the game. It's none of our business how Lily feels about James."

"I can't just ignore it now, every time I look at Potter I imagine the disgusting sight of him with Evans." Benji continued, crinkling his nose as if he smelt something repulsive, making an inconsiderate comment about love being in the air.

"Sod off" Lily hissed, dropping her gaze from the game to her hands. Pretending to have not heard Benji whisper to Frank that he was absolutely sure she was in love with Potter.

The boys shifted their attention back towards the game just as Remus took off down the field ahead of everyone else. "Lupin with the Quaffle." Amelia announced, "Potter catches up and is passed the Quaffle. He shoots and scores, that 130-340."

"Diggory throws the ball across the pitch right into the hands of Taylor, quick shot to the middle hoop and it slips through Andrews hands. That's 140-350." Amelia screams into the microphone, "The Hufflepuff crowd is going wild. Potter's team hasn't lost a match yet this season, and it looks like this one is going to be the first."

"Andrews throws the Quaffle back out into play and Bloomsburry take it up the field. It slips out of her hands as she swerves around Taylor and falls right into Stones hands would was waiting under her for the drop. Back down the field, Stone lines up for the shot, concerned about being hit by a bludger Andrews moves out of the way leaving the hoops wide open. Goal! That's 10 points to Hufflepuff, making it 360-140."

"Mckinnon looks visibly upset having not supported her keeper. Doesn't look like the Gryffindor team is getting along quite well." Amelia states, drawing all eye to Marlene.

A number of Hogwarts students started to leave the stands as the game neared the 3 hour mark. The Snitch had been nowhere in sight and the Gryffindor team had begun to fall even further behind. Amos Diggory, captain of the Hufflepuff team, had called a time out for the sake of yelling at his seeker for not doing his job properly. A moment which James encouraged his team to rest,

"Now I know were all tired," he announced, watching as more and more students left the stands, "The wind is picking up and it's gotten much colder, but as the game goes on we have to continue to get stronger. We're going to catch them by surprise and come back stronger than ever so we can put an end to this game, once and for all."

They nodded their agreement, and mounted their brooms, taking off to the sky once more. With a new determination, the Gryffindor team started what would be known as the biggest come-back of Hogwarts Quidditch history. One by one the chasers weaved around the Hufflepuff players, making goal after goal until the they were within 160 points from the other team.

Sirius kept scanning the pitch for the bludgers as the Hufflepuff beaters were hitting them in any direction to try and prevent the Gryffindor team from scoring any more points. He watches as James quickly passes the Quaffle to Haillie, and then he sees what he had been searching for; headed right for their chasers head was an extremely fast flying bludger. As quickly as he could, he sped over to where she was, pulling his arm back and preparing to swing.

Haillie quickly swerved out of the way to make room for Sirius and the bludger went sailing down to the other end of the pitch. Although just when he felt accomplished, it was hit back towards them by the opposing team. "To the hoop!" Sirius shouted to the chaser, "I'll cover you"

Together they flew as fast as possible down towards the hoops, Sirius keeping his right arm out in preparation. The bludger chased them down the pitch, and just as they were within throwing distance of the goals, it caught up to them. Haillie having her back turned, failed to see what exactly had happened, although later she would admit to having heard a loud crack from behind her.

The bludger had made a turn unexpectedly and instead of it making contact with Sirius' bat, it made contact with his arm. The crowd had cheered, no one having noticed what had happened, as Haillie had sent the Quaffle soaring through the left hoop.

"Bloody hell" Sirius hissed, putting his bat in his left hand, flying down the pitch with his right arm tucked under his chest. James made eye contact with him, and immediately flew over, letting Remus and Haillie momentarily. to charge the hoops by themselves.

"What's wrong?" he demanded, flying slowly past him.

"I've broken my bloody arm," Sirius hissed in reply.

James nodded, flying off to help out his fellow chasers, making eye contact with their seeker, Peter. He gave him a quick nod, and instantly Peter started to scan for the snitch.

Within moments he was off down towards the bottom of the Gryffindors left hoop, the snitch fluttering just above the ground. With at least one brooms length in front of the Hufflepuff seeker, Peter was able to easily beat him. He reached his arm out and sighed in relief as his fingers tightened around the golden snitch.

The whistle blew and the Gryffindors left in the stands cheered. They had tied the game 360-360.

* * *

><p>"How was that coach?" Peter asked James, after a triumphant pat on the shoulder, still holding the snitch in his hand.<p>

James smiled brightly, "Perfect. That's what I mean when I say prime"

"So what does this mean?" Haillie asked coming up from behind them, having already been congratulated by the majority of the Gryffindors, "There had to be a winner for this game, it plays a huge role in the Cup"

"Diggory, Hooch and I are going to have to coordinate a rematch, most likely." James replied, noticing a familiar red head standing on the other side of the pitch. "Amazing work today!" he congratulated his teammates, "You should be extremely proud of yourselves!"

"Thanks James" Haillie replied, "You as well"

He waved goodbye to them, making his way through the crowd, receiving the occasional pat on the back for a game well played.

"James!" Marlene shouted, nearly running in to him. She looked extremely worn out from the game they had just played, and was holding her wrist making it clearly obvious that she had sprained it at some point during the match. Behind the exhaustion, she seemed extremely happy. "Have you seen Sirius?"

He smiled, realizing that Greg had probably just ended it between them. James excitedly scanned the crowd for the familiar set of hair, spotting his best mate standing on the side of the field, away from the crowd. He pointed in the direction and Marlene took off without another word, running as fast as her tired legs would carry her.

James, in turn, made his way over towards Lily. "Did you enjoy the match then?" he asked, grinning as he came up beside her.

"I was sitting on the edge of my seat the entire time." She replied, turning to face him, "Congratulations on your comeback, you sure had everyone convinced that you were going to go down without a fight."

"Me?" James said, putting a hand to his chest, "Go down without a fight? Never."

She smiled in reply, her eyes glazing over, falling back into her thoughts. "Is everything alright, Lily? You seem very distracted.." he muttered, more than slightly concerned for how she was feeling.

"Yeah I'm fine, James" she answered automatically.

He raised his eyebrows, "Are you sure?" he questioned further.

She heaved a great sigh, "I so utterly confused about what's going on with us, James. It doesn't make any sense, and I just don't know what we're supposed to do." she confessed, cutting him off before James could reply, "Either way, this is not the right time or place to have this conversation. Again, congratulations on your game. Go celebrate with your team and I'll see you later in the common room."

James watched Lily start to make her way back up to the castle, turning around to find Remus near by. "Prongs" he shouted, pointing in Marlene and Sirius' direction, "Are you watching this?!"

James made his way over towards his best mate, "What's been happening?" he asked, and couldn't help but feel excited for Sirius on the opposite side of the pitch.

"Nothing yet," Remus replied, "But somethings about to!"

"Sirius!" Marlene had shouted at the top of her lungs to get his attention as she ran towards him. "I've been looking everywhere for you! Where have you been?"

He smiled brightly upon seeing her, jogging slightly towards her. "Marlene" he managed to say, "I was looking for you as well, but figured that you had gone off with Andrews after the game had ended"

"But I did go off with Gregory," she replied, and Sirius' face fell slightly, "I went off with him, and he started confessing these things, and telling me all these other things about you and him, and then he ended it. Just told me it was the right thing to do and walked off, no other explanation."

"He really did that?" Sirius demanded,

"Yeah" she replied, a smiling growing on her face, "He said that I should probably come and find you afterwards as well, he said that you would have something extremely important to tell me."

"You know that I honestly couldn't have done it without you," he replied,

Taken aback by the change in conversation, it took Marlene a few seconds to respond, "Please," she stated, "You were completely brilliant and could've won the match single-handedly if the rules would allow for one beater."

"I didn't just mean the match, Marlene." Sirius continued, "I meant everything. Over these past few years, when we've been together, you've helped me grow and become a better person. You've made me realize that I couldn't keep pulling pranks forever; that I couldn't keep picking on everyone younger than me; that I couldn't keep snogging other girls to make myself feel better and wanted. You've made me realize who I want to be, and strive to actually become him. And I need you to know that because I need you to realize how much you mean to me.

When I had thought that I had really truly lost you, I felt that I had also lost myself. The part of me that you made better, was gone and there was nothing I could do about it. I understand now that I will always be who you helped me become if I always carry you in my heart. I've missed you so much and seeing you with Andrews was so incredibly painful because I knew that you were going to change him in the same way you changed me, and when that happened he would never make the same mistake that I did; he would never let you go.

And that was hard to believe, because I love you so goddamn much and I couldn't imagine being with anyone else ever again; if I could spend my life falling asleep and waking up to you every morning then I know I would need nothing else."

At this point Marlene had fallen completely silent, and just when Sirius was afraid that she would reject him, she threw herself into his arms and firmly planted her lips on his.

"I love you Sirius" she whispered, as they pulled back from each other moments later. "More than you could ever imagine."

He sighed in relief, running a hand through her hair. Placing his hand on the back of her neck, he pulled her into his chest, vowing in that moment to never let her go again.

She, in turn, rested her head on his chest, feeling content at the sound of his beating heart; knowing that in his arms is where she was meant to be forever.


	30. Chapter 30

**_Monday, March 15th_**

Lily waited in the common area of the Head's dormitories, a small rucksack, to which she had added an undetectable extension charm, packed with all her belongings that she would need for the weekend. She could hear James fumbling upstairs in his room, and decided against digging through her bag for the book she was reading. Instead, Lily let her mind wander back to a few nights earlier:

_She had sat with Marlene and Sirius, who, after having reunited, had barely left each others side. Remus had promised that he would be down shortly, having ushered them on while they waited for him in the common room, and James was nowhere to be found, leaving Lily all alone with the pair. She was extremely happy for her two friends, that they managed to work out all there problems, but couldn't help but be slightly annoyed that when they were together, no one else existed. For that reason, Lily nearly jumped to her feet in excitement when she saw James turn the corner and enter the Great Hall.  
><em>

_He quickly spotted the three of them, as Lily waved her hands in the air for him to see, jogging over towards them. "You'll never believe what I just heard" James started, taking the empty seat next to Lily, as Marlene and Sirius remained completely absorbed in each other. "They're sending us home"_

_"What?" Lily demanded, drawing the attention of a few students. "Sending us home?"_

_James smirked, serving himself dinner, "Not for very long, and it's not mandatory" he corrected himself, "They're sending us home for an early Easter break on Monday, or so I heard."_

_"Sorry" interrupted Marlene, "I didn't quite catch that.. Did you say they're sending us home?"_

_Both her and Sirius turned their attention to the conversation, "Yeah, Dumbledore is going to let us all know tonight after we eat." James added, "We may as well just wait for him to let us know."_

_Marlene and Sirius nodded in agreement and turned back to each other, leaving Lily and James to talk by themselves. "I wonder why they're letting us go home.." Lily mused, hoping that James would have an answer._

_He shrugged in reply, "It's definitely not to just see family and have a grand old-time, that's for sure" he added, somewhat sarcastically, implying that there didn't always have to be a secret meaning behind the spontaneous actions of the Hogwarts staff._

_Lily recognized his familiar tone and quickly dropped the subject, with full intent to bring it up once more when there was no one else to overhear their conversation. "So I suspect you'll be going home then?" she asked, a part of her hoping that he would stay at the school with her._

_"I haven't seen my mum and dad since Christmas so I doubt I'll have much of a choice." James replied, "They've been really worried about me recently, god knows why, something about danger and threats. To be honest, I don't really listen when they get going on that stuff. If you've heard it once, you've heard it all."_

_"I would bet," Lily added halfheartedly, turning back towards her meal._

_"Now I would usually never bore you with any of this," James continued, eying the staff table, watching the teachers all shift in their seats as they waited for Dumbledore to speak. "I just wanted to give you fair warning because they're definitely going to lecture you about safety and such when they meet you."_

_Lily looked at him questioningly, however couldn't hide a small smile on her face, "Meet me?" she asked,_

_James rolled his eyes in reply, "Well, these two" he said, gesturing to Marlene and Sirius, "haven't left each others side for weeks, so I sincerely doubt you'll be wanting to stay at Marlene's. And you could go to Remus' but let's be honest, my mum's brisket is better than his, so I just figured you'd be staying at mine." _

_"I don't know, James" Lily began, "I don't want to be an imposition"_

_"Please" he scoffed, "Dad has been absolutely dying to meet the girl who managed to live, undetected, for months. It was my dad's team that set out to find you, so he's just dying to pick your brain and figure out how you did it. And Mum wants to share knitting patterns or something.."_

_"That's the less embarrassing way of putting it," Sirius cut in, "His parents want to meet you because you're all he ever talks about when he's home."_

_James glared at his fellow Marauder, "Go back to your girlfriend," he hissed, as Sirius chuckled in reply._

_"Just tell him you'll go, Lily" Sirius added, getting up from the table and taking Marlene with him, "Otherwise I won't hear the end of it."_

_"You probably won't hear the end of it either way" Marlene added, laughing along with Sirius._

_Sirius pulled her closer to him, "And that is way I love her," he announced, as others around them rolled their eyes at their public display. "She's so quick-witted, I just love that."_

_They made their way out of the Great Hall, leaving Lily and James on their own. "Of course," James continued, moments later, "If you prefer to stay at school or go somewhere else you can. I won't take offense."_

_"Let's just see what Dumbledore has to say first." she replied, mirroring James' smile, as the Head master got to his feet._

_"Good evening to all" he announced, silencing the few students that hadn't notice him get to his feet, "This weekend you would all be given an opportunity to return home on the train that will leave Friday evening. I can't reenforce how important I feel it is for you all to return home this weekend, however if you choose to, Hogwarts will remain open for those who wish to stay. Please refer yourselves to the Head of your House if you are choosing to stay at Hogwarts this weekend, otherwise it is assumed that you will be returning home. Friday evening all those returning home must report to the Great Hall before boarding the carriages, an assortment of teachers will be here to keep track of who will be leaving."_

_"Good evening to all," Dumbledore concluded, "It is now requested that you return to your dormitories."_

_"We should help get the students back to their common rooms" Lily mentioned to James, her eyes still on the Head master._

_There was no reply from James and Lily turned around to see that he had disappeared into the crowd. Frustrated that she was going to have to help the students by herself, she began to usher them out of the Dinning Hall towards their house's prefect._

_James came up behind her, gently grabbing her wrist. "Dumbledore wants to speak with us," he informed her, weaving them through the crowd down a deserted hallway._

_She walked along side him, deciding not to question the curious hall way that he had led them down that headed in the opposite direction from the Headmaster's office. James pulled out his wand and stopped in front of an empty frame, where a portrait used to hang. He mumbled an incantation and it swung open to reveal a spiral staircase, that Lily assumed was going to lead them right to Dumbledore's office._

_"After you" he offered, extending a hand._

_Lily took out her own wand and illuminated it to light up the dark staircase as she climbed. "Now, how and when did you find this passage?"_

_"Earlier this year," James replied, following closely behind her, "Sirius and Remus found it,"_

_"Did Dumbledore say what he wanted to talk about with us?" Lily asked, assuming that James was pulled aside by the Headmaster during the short period he was absent from her side.  
><em>

_"I didn't actually speak with him." James replied, bumping into Lily as she stopped abruptly in front of him._

_She turned around to face him, "What do you mean you didn't speak with him? How do you know he wants to speak with us if he hasn't told you?" she asked, crossing her arms over her chest, realizing this could just be another one of his pranks._

_"He gave me a look as he dismissed everyone." James replied, squeezing past her and taking the lead._

_They came to a small door at the very top of the staircase, which opened to the hallway directly out side of the Headmaster's office, the large gargoyle in plain view of the passage. "We traipsed all the way up here because Dumbledoregave you a _look _?" Lily asked, skeptical of James' story._

_James continued down the hall and muttered the password to the gargoyle. It greeted them joyfully, commenting that the Headmaster had been waiting to see them, and moved aside to revel another set of stairs. James took them two at a time, while Lily followed at a more leisurely pace. When she got to the top of the stairs, James had already seated himself across from their Headmaster._

_"Ah Lily!" James exclaimed as if he hadn't been expecting her, "How nice of you to join us! I've only just gotten here myself"_

_She rolled her eyes, a smile playing on her lips, "I'm well aware you just got here, I walked up here with you."_

_Dumbledore smiled, extending his arm as an offering for her to take the chair next to James. "I'm glad you received my message," he told them both, "I was hesitant to approach either one of you because there are eyes within Hogwarts that are looking for a reason."_

_"A reason for what?" Lily asked, leaning forward._

_The Headmaster waved his hand as to dismiss the topic, "I've requested to meet with you about this weekend. As you already know, we are encouraging everyone to leave Hogwarts for the time being while we get a few things sorted."Dumbledore informed them, "The castle has to undergo some adjustments to further protect our students from unwanted visitors, but as there are students within Hogwarts that seem to be recruited by a group of extremely influential witches and wizards, we have had to send everyone home to make sure that these new adjustments remain as secret as possible."_

_"Why does the castle need further protection? Aren't there already protective enchantments surrounding the castle?" Lily asked, seeing James nervously playing with his wand out of the corner of her eye._

_"It was brought to my attention that the current enchantments aren't as strong as they could be, and as Headmaster, it is my rightful duty to make sure that the students are safe within the Hogwarts walls." he replied, pushing his spectacles up on his nose._

_"I imagine we're being protected against something outside the walls of Hogwarts, and Sir, with the uttermost respect, wouldn't sending the students away from Hogwarts be putting them in more danger?" Lily questioned, concerned for the well-being of her fellow student, surprised at how quiet James has remained throughout their conversation._

_"We have reason to believe that, this weekend, there is no threat to the students leaving." Dumbledore replied, "I assure you we are not simply sending hundreds of students out into danger. Currently, they are in more danger here than anywhere else. Besides, this is a fine opportunity for students to see their families and those closest to them."_

_"Sir?" James asked, almost whispering, "There's a war coming, isn't there?"_

_The Headmaster didn't answer._

_"It's the group that call themselves the Death Eater's." James continued, "They've traveled around the world, recruiting; they're getting an army together."_

_"Mr. Potter.." Dumbledore began, however James cut him off._

_"I want to help." he interrupted, "I want to fight."_

_"James!" Lily exclaimed, "Do you hear yourself? You're merely a student, you can't go out and fight, it would be a suicide mission."_

_Before he could argue, the Headmaster spoke, "Unfortunately, I would have to agree with Ms. Evans. You are both very skilled, however, we have reason to believe that this group has practiced a type of magic that you simply would not be ready for. It is not the wisest idea for anyone of your age to be fighting in your current state."_

_"And I'm very certain that neither your mother or father would let you upon hearing of this.."_

_"I'm seventeen, I'm of age." James replied, "My parents do not have control over me anymore.."_

_"Ah, well that might be true," Dumbledore agreed, "Their opinions still have a great influence. They did raise you after all. However, I didn't call you here to discuss this matter, rather, I asked to speak with you to remind you to always be vigilant. If something doesn't seem right, it probably isn't. Carry your wands with you wherever you go, have it close by even when you sleep."_

_"I thought you said that we were safe this weekend." James retorted, his arms crossed, suddenly defensive after the Headmaster's refusal to let him help._

_"I did, although, after what happened to Ms. Evans earlier this year, I imagine that there is a permanent watch on the both of you. I wish I could promise you that you're safe, but I feel that is not the case." He replied, "Though, as long as your vigilant, carry your wands and look out for each other, you'll be safe."_

_"Now off to bed for the both of you," he concluded, "We've got a couple of long days ahead of us."_

_They returned to their dormitories, and each went in to their respective rooms. Lily lay in bed gripping her wand so tightly in her hands, thinking about how foolish she had been to assume that after escaping those horrible people once that they would leave her alone. The truth of it being that she would never be safe. They wanted her dead and weren't going to stop until they had fulfilled their task._

_"Lily?" James whispered into the darkness of her bedroom, interrupting her train of thought._

_"Yeah, James?" she replied, propping herself up in her bed._

_"You're coming with me over the break." He firmly told her, "My parents will protect and take care of you."_

_"I'm just going to be putting you and your family in even more danger." She replied, as James crossed the threshold of her bedroom and sat down next to her._

_"We're already in danger," he told her, "It won't hurt to be in a little more. Besides I already told them that you're coming and they're very excited, so you would hate to disappoint them."_

_She nodded, climbing under her blankets. James sat with her for a little while longer and eventually got to his feet, thinking that she had fallen asleep. "Stay" she ordered, her head buried in her pillow, muffling her words._

_James had been certain he had heard her correctly, and was positive as she pulled him down next to her and curled up into his arms._

Now, days later, she waited patiently for James to come down into the common room so they could walk beyond the boundaries and aparate to his house on the outskirts of London. "James?" she called up from the couch,

"I'm almost ready! I promise" he replied, his voice muffled through his closed-door.

Just as Lily began to draw impatient, James fumbled down the stairs with his small truck in hand, knocking it off the wall with every descending step he took. "Alright then, let's go and get there before Mum starts to worry that I aparated us incorrectly or something.." he stated, taking the lead.

Lily flicked her wand and shrunk her rucksack down to pocket-sized, threw on her winter cloak and followed James out into the corridor. "You're definitely not going to be aparating us; I would like to meet your parents in one piece." she countered, watching as a smirk grew on his face.

The halls were empty and Lily assumed that the majority of the students had already left to see their families. "You don't even know where we're going; there's no way you can aparate us there."

They continued to argue until they had reached the boundary of the Hogwarts grounds, the Headmaster and McGonagall standing side-by-side at the gate. "We were beginning to wonder whether you two had changed your mind," their head of house commented, indicating that they had waited for them.

"We could have easily let ourselves out," James replied, "You didn't have to stand out here in the cold and wait for us."

Albus smiled and stared at Lily and James over top of his spectacles, "Be not afraid of what lies beyond Hogwarts," he told them, watching them as they glanced at the gate, "It will not always be there to protect you, as you will soon leave it behind. Stay strong, and vigilant while you are away."

Lily responded quickly and their Headmaster and Head of House bid them safe travels. She grabbed James' hand and pulled him across the boundary. She nodded to him, and he beamed down at her, gripping her hand a little tighter and aparatingthem away from Hogwarts to his welcoming neighbourhood. She opened her eyes to a well-lit street, the florescence of the street lamps illuminating the street so brightly that Lily imagined James as a child living on a street where night never came and it was always daylight.

"We're just a little way down the road," James told her, keeping her hand in his and leading her down the winding street. "I didn't want to land too close,"

"James, what if they hate me?" Lily questioned, a thought that had been on her mind all day, but seemed extremely obscure to her companion.

He gazed down at her, a smirk growing on his face, "What an incredibly stupid question." He stated, seeming rather harsh but she knew he meant it in the best way, "They're going to love you. I promise."

They walked in comfortable silence, their footsteps falling in unison. "Besides," he said, "It wouldn't matter if they hated you"

He didn't finish the thought. Instead gesturing to a small, quaint house on the corner lot, and ushering Lily in its direction. At first glance, she hadn't expected something so simple. It was rather well-known that the Potter's came from a long line of wealth, and she found herself pleasantly surprised at its petit exterior.

James pulled out his wand as they approached the small picket fence that encircled the lot, he pressed the tip to the small handle on the gate and it unlatched, swinging open all on its own. He took the lead, holding the gate open for her as she made her way through and being extra careful to close it tightly behind her. Lily imaged that he took so much care because the fence contained an assortment of undetectable protection charms, after all, both his parents were higher class Aurors. He raised his wand as they approached the front door, flicking it open.

There was movement from within the house, and moments later his mother appeared in the hall. She immediately walked over towards them, embracing them both.

Lily froze in place, willing her body to move, but remaining in a state of complete shock. Whether it was because the interior of the Potter's home was nothing like the exterior and was extended into a mansion; or whether it was because she hadn't been expecting such a warm welcome, and the last time she had been so lovingly welcomed into a home it had been her own. But either way, she felt an arrangement of confusing emotions; nervousness; sadness; frustration; relief.

"My darling boy" James' mother said, pulling back from both and kissing him lovingly on the cheek.

"And Lily, of course, my sweet girl" she said turning towards her, extending her hand, "I've heard so much about you."


	31. Chapter 31

_**Saturday, March 20th**_

Lily lay awake in bed, like she had done all through the night, thinking of the great danger she was putting the Potters in while she stayed with them; feeling guilty for the burden she caused. The sun had just begun to peak up over the horizon when she decided that laying in bed was doing her no good, Lily climbed out of bed and dressed for the day; it being very weird to put on muggle clothing during, what would be, a regular school day.

The large house was silent, and Lily felt incredibly out of place being awake while everyone else slept. Even still, she slowly opened the door to the guest bedroom and poked her head into the hallway only to see James' bedroom door firmly closed. She wondered if it would be unreasonable of her to creep into his room at this early hour; if his parents would be angry and disapproving knowing that she had been in there. Deciding against it, she proceeded out of her room, and crept down the hallway, thinking that she could go for a walk and explore the neighbourhood. Lily made her way down the grand staircase, completely surprised to find a light on down the hall. Slowly she made her way towards it, crossing the threshold of the hallway into the kitchen, to find a man which she could of easily mistaken for an older, more mature, James.

He looked up from his paper when he noticed her presence in the doorway, "I didn't think anyone else would ever be awake this early in the morning" he stated, "I didn't even hear you moving around"

"I didn't want to disturb anyone by making noise," she replied, advancing forward.

He smirked, an extremely familiar look that she constantly received from James, "You couldn't disturb them if you tried, James and his mother are such deep sleepers, a war could be raging right outside their bedroom doors and they would surely sleep through it."

"But not you?"

"No, hopefully not" he replied, getting to his feet and making his way around the island towards the counter. He grabbed another mug from the cupboard and placed it alongside his beside the kettle. Ushering her over to the table, to the chair across from his.

In her mind, Lily had imaged meeting James' father for the first time many times before; however, each time something always seemed to go wrong and everything felt forced. This was easy and natural, something she had definitely not anticipated. She had remembered feeling so relieved when Ms. Potter told them after they had arrived that Mr. Potter wasn't going to be home until late that night, she had remembered being so nervous before hand, but now Lily couldn't seem to figure out why.

Harold Potter had soft, welcoming features. His eyes greeted you as if he was meeting you for the first time, his voice reached out and engulfs your entire body in a deep surround sound. Lily found herself hanging off every one of his words, waiting to her the genius behind his simple phrases. In him, she saw James, and someone completely different, and, as much as she would hate to admit it, she saw her father in him as well; the protective, caring, loving father.

The kettle came to a boil and he poured them both a cup of tea. He placed the cup in front of her and retook his seat, taking a long sip from his cup before placing it down on the table.

"I've heard quite a lot about you, Lily Evans"

"Good things I hope"

He smiled, "The best. This, however, is not how I imagined us meeting. Personally, I had hoped we would meet a few months ago."

Lily didn't apologize for causing him so much stress, realizing that behind his words he was impressed with her, and instead he wanted her story of the last few some unknown reason, the story that she hadn't trusted in her closest friends, she found herself easily recounting to Harold Potter. He gasped and awed in all the right places as Lily told all she could remember.

The words that she had been unable to fid in the past came so easily to her now. She was now suddenly able to justify all her actions; finding a reason behind the large majority. She recounted the morning where she realized that running wasn't going to get her anywhere, and her only way to truly avenge her parents death was to return to Hogwarts and finish her studies.

Harold Potter seemed surprised at her, and to be fair Lily was quite surprised with herself as well. Lily made no discovery of humility in herself; her reasons for changing her career were selfish; she in no wanted to fight so that other muggleborns wouldn't have to experience the same pain of loosing someone. This retelling of events forced her to realize that the decision she made to become an Auror was out of revenge, she wanted to make the Death Eater's feel like she had felt; Lily wanted to destroy their world right before their eyes. She wanted to win.

Lily was starting to frighten herself as her inner most thoughts surfaced. She wanted the Death Eater's to suffer, and would not stop until everything they cared about was torn to pieces. A series of memories resurfaced; Snape, her former best friend, using one of the unforgivable curses on her; finding out about her mother and father's attack in that morning profit; waking up from horrible dreams where she's felt is pain. The inhuman people that did this to her deserve any misfortune to come there way.

Harold Potter sat with her while she continued to relive every horrible moment of her past, where her blood status was the cause of her pain. He cringed slightly when she disdainfully started to talk about their pureblood status, because they didn't understand what it meant to lose someone so close to you as a result of you being a mudblood. Everyone has experienced loss, but not like Lily. Her life was torn out from under her, and not just once.

"Someone's watching me, and the second they see that I am happy, for once, they go about every action to change that. Lily Evan's is not allowed to be happy. She's a mudblood, she doesn't deserve it. I'm hated in the wizarding world. And I used to go home and experience some relief because my parents were so proud to have a witch in the family, even if they would never admit to it. There's nothing there for me anymore. I'm hated in the muggle world." said Lily, "So where do I belong? The answer, is that I don't. So, Mr. Potter, my question to you, is why shouldn't I fight this out? There going to keep fighting until I'm dead, and I'm going to do the same, because honestly, I've got nothing to lose."

Lily dropped her gaze, slightly embarrassed to have unloaded on him. He, however, couldn't stop staring at her. She was so passionate to win this war; and so naive to think that she has lost everything; and so admirable. He found it incredibly obvious why his son had fallen so hard for her.

"There's an order that is assembling, and my dear I tell you this in complete confidence, an assemble of witches and wizards, much like yourself, who believe that they need to risk everything they have to win this war. I've met and seen the bravest and most passionate witches and wizards, but you my dear don't compare. They, as an order, would be extremely lucky to have someone like you," Harold Potter told her.

Lily smiled slightly, "Where do I sign?"

"Now don't be too eager," he replied, "In good time, they will come to you, that is a promise. And as I am not your biological father, or anything besides a man who thinks the world of you and cares for you, I am not allowed to influenced your decision to join or not. What I ask of you, before you make any rash decisions, is to ask yourself is it really worth risking everything you have now or even will have in the future."

The conversation went unfinished as Mrs. Potter came strolling into the kitchen. "Harold," she stated, putting her hands on her hips, "It seems as if you've found a friend." She turned towards Lily, winking as if they shared some kind of inside joke, "It will be good for him to have someone else to help pass the time."

* * *

><p>James' parents had left shortly after dinner, muttering something about a work related meeting and rushing out the door. Lily, choosing to overlook the possible connection between the conversation she had that morning with Harold Potter and their sudden leave, decided instead to indulge in one of the many books she found in the Potter's personal library.<p>

"Don't you ever sleep?" James asked, startling her as he came out from the shadows.

Lily put down her book, "How long have you been standing there?" she replied

He shrugged, he having said goodnight hours ago looked restless and exhausted. Recognizing the same symptoms in herself, Lily understood that his mind had gotten the better of him. He stared off in to space, either deep in thought or simply without thought; Lily couldn't decide. However, the more the silence prolonged, the more Lily began to worry for her fellow housemate. She said his name to try and initiate conversation, getting a response out of him on her third attempt. "What's on your mind?" she asked,

James made no effort to reply, and Lily waited before pressing the matter. "Sometimes, I can't fall asleep at night, or find myself completely distracted all throughout the day by paralyzing thoughts, and the only way to get them off my mind is for me to tell them to someone else. A few months ago I broke down in front of a fifth year because he was the only one around to listen at the time. I guess what I'm trying to say is that if that a stranger wasn't judgemental of my thoughts, than I'm definitely not going to be judgemental of yours. You can trust me, James."

Lily remembered the moment, right after her parents had been killed, where she sat on her window's edge and calculated the distance of the fall. In that moment, she had no family, her friends were unheard from and there was no one in the world that loved her. She would've never gone through with it, but the risk of sitting there, of it being so close, was enough. Truthfully, it was that moment that she decided she was going to fight in the war. No one should have to lose their family, and she, having nothing to lose, was the perfect candidate.

Nearly losing herself completely in her own thoughts, Lily was caught off guard when James finally responded. "I just want to run," he whispered, "I don't want to fight in this war, I don't want to see my friends die and I don't want them to see me die. We're not strong enough for that, we're not old enough to have to lose everything. I've barely lived, Lily. What do I have to show for my life, my job? the goals I've made in Quidditch? my pranks? my past girlfriends? I haven't even had the chance to prove myself and now I'm supposed to just through my future away because some stranger needs me to? I'm tired of being strong while everyone else is allowed to display their weakness, I can't be strong anymore."

"I'll be strong for you," Lily whispered in reply.

James shook his head, "I can't put that burden on you, Lily. Out of all of us you're the one who should be allowed to be weak."

"Then just for right now," She stated, her voice catching in her throat, "I'll be strong right now, and we can go back to how the way things _should _be tomorrow."

Lily grabbed his hand and noticed he was crying. She had always assumed that one day he would cry in front of her, but she never assumed it to be so painful. He tried to hide his face, gasping every so often in an attempt to gather himself. She took his head in her hands and pressed it to her chest. "It's going to be alright, James. We're going to be strong for each other."

At some point, Lily had enough sense to direct James back up the stairs, falling down beside him as he lay down in his own bed. "Just stay here tonight" he concluded, and Lily was not in any position to argue with him about what his parents would think when they got home.

James fell asleep rather quickly, holding her tightly to his chest.

Lily lay into him, making sure he was sleeping soundly before whispering "I love you, James"

_**Monday, March 22nd**_

"So how was it?" Marlene demanded as they retreated to their usual compartment on the Hogwarts express.

Lily looked at her questioningly, "How was what?"

"Meeting your future parents-in-law" Alice said, exchanging a look with Marlene. "Besides, you and James were alone in his big empty house all weekend and you're going to try and tell us that nothing happened"

Lily didn't think their eyes could roll further back into their heads when she told them that nothing did, in fact, happen between them; but no matter how much she insisted that what she was telling them was the truth, her friends refused to hear it.

After what felt like weeks of demands, Lily finally caved, "I told him I loved him," smirking as her best friends fell completely silent. "He didn't hear it because he was asleep, but I told him."

"First of all," Marlene started, after the initial shock had faded, "That's huge, you _love _him? I didn't even know you were capable of love at this point Evans."

Alice shot Marlene a look, shaking her head at the horrible joke, "Also, you slept in his bed."

"You know what this means, Evans!" Marlene shouted, "It's just a matter of time now, and don't think we don't know about Sirius walking in on you two."

Alice crossed her arms, "I personally can't believe you didn't tell us yourself."

Lily's thoughts began to get the best of her and the voice's of her friends faded away. She felt something inside her, a feeling that she had long since forgotten. In that moment, she realized that she was never going to let go of it ever again, because she knew that the feeling she found again inside of her is her strength. When her parents died, and she ran away, hiding out in some tiny apartment in the dirty part of London, Lily didn't know hope. But here it was again; the Potter's had ignited it inside her once more. Not only did Lily have a reason to fight in the upcoming war, she now had someone to fight for and someone to fight for her. She was so happy to have finally found hope in her bitter world.

"Lily!" Marlene shouted, "Are you even listening to us? Because we have half the mind to walk over to their compartment and tell James ourselves. You can't just keep playing around with him like this, now that you know, he deserves to know."

Lily smiled, stating that as long as they didn't beat her to it, "I'm not going to keep this a secret much longer,"

* * *

><p>"Prongs!" Sirius shouted, jumping into the seat beside him. "I missed you so much!"<p>

James rolled his eyes, "Padfoot, in all seriousness, it's only been three days or so. Besides, you'll been happy to have gotten away from me for a while once you hear what I've got planned for Quidditch practices now that we're all back at school. After all, the finals are coming up very shortly, and we still have to beat Hufflepuff in a rematch to place."

"Not only I am going to be working with a few of the team members individually, but were going to be practicing almost day and night for the next few weeks. Knowing Diggory, he going to give us the least amount of time Hootch will let him before we have to face them again," He added.

Sirius and Remus shared looks of displeasure, but knew that if practicing day and night meant they would win, it was worth it.

"Alright Prongs" Sirius said eagerly, "I'm dying here. What happened between you and Lily this weekend?"

"Would you believe nothing happened?" James asked hesitantly.

Remus snorted, "Not after what happened on Lily's birthday," with a concerned look from James he clarified, "Sirius practically shouted to the entire great hall the story of what he walked in on."

James covered his face with his hands, muttering under his breath about how embarrassing his best mates were. "But really James." Remus continued, "Shirtless?"

"Will you two drop it if I tell you what happened?" James bargained, knowing that they were definitely going to agree, and when they did. He told them what he heard Lily tell him when she thought he was asleep.


	32. Chapter 32

_**Thursday, April 1st**_

After a long night of planning and approximately 3 hours of sleep, the three Marauder's, save for Peter who had decided to abandon their plans at the last minute, grabbed their broomsticks and opened the window to their dormitory. Remus backed away from the window to indicate that he would not be the first man out, Sirius followed suit, taking one look at the drop from the dormitory window and falling in line with Remus. James hesitantly stepped up onto the ledge, praying that Remus had jinxed their brooms correctly. In one full swoop, James jumped off of the ledge, swinging his one leg around his broom, and directed his broomstick in an upwards direction so much that he nearly smashed his head on the window shutters. Sirius followed James, climbing up onto the window sill with a little more confidence and jumping off with such grace that Remus questioned whether he had done this in the past. His fellow Marauder's hovered in front of the window and waited.

"Moony!" James shouted in a hushed tone, "I don't mean to rush you, but if the sun comes up and we're not in our beds and McGonagall finds out, there's no way any of this is going to work."

Remus gulped, climbing up on the windows edge just like his mates had done, and with one big breath jumped right into the air, landing hard on his broom. He heaved a sigh of relief as the three of them flew their way down towards the Quidditch pitch, glad that his magic had been strong enough to pass through the castle's curfew charms, which prevented anyone from exciting or entering the castle, by any means, between 10pm and 6am.

They touched down in the centre of the pitch only moments later, having flown as quickly as possible in the hopes to remain undetected. Knowing that they were going to be slightly off schedule because they were one man down, the Marauder's worked much faster than intended. Barely having touched down on to the ground, James kicked off, throwing the key to the change and equipment room down to Remus, flying off in the direction of the three hoops on the far right side of the pitch.

James drew intricate webbing into each of the hoops with his wand, watching as the lines vanished before his eyes. He proceeded to draw the same design in each hoop. Sirius worked below him at the base of the hoops, casting a specific set of curses on each of them. The two boys worked quickly, and were nearly finished as Remus emerged from the change and equipment rooms, ensuring them that he had successfully completed both his and Peter's designated job.

Once they all had finished, they met each other in the middle of the pitch.

"Prongs, is there any chance we could be disqualified from Quidditch after all this?" Remus asked, "I know how important winning this year is to you."

James pretended to contemplate his question, but having already spent the better part of the night worrying about the potential consequences, he decided that it was still extremely important that they pull this off. "In all seriousness, we could all use something to laugh about these days"

Sirius raised his wand to the sky, initiating the same action in his two mates. "Remember to focus" Remus warned them, "This is going to be significantly harder with just the three of us"

"On my count then" Sirius said, the others nodding in agreement.

"3" The boys straightened their arms

"2" They each drew a short breath

"1" Channeling the majority of their energy through they wands, a bright yellow light burst through, falling all around the pitch.

* * *

><p>"Where were you this morning?" Lily asked, narrowing her eyes at the three Marauders, "I went by the common room to fetch Marlene, and neither of you were in sight."<p>

James cleared his throat, taking the seat beside her, "We may have stayed up longer than we should have last night, and may have slept in way later than usual" he said

"You may have?"

Sirius leaned across the table, "We _may_ have" he confirmed, winking at her.

"Whether you slept in or not," Lily said, "We could all use a good laugh today."

"Well at least we have Quidditch to look forward to today" Marlene interrupted, "I'll bet 5 pounds Ravenclaw will beat Slyterin today"

"I'll take that" Remus challenged.

A few hours later, the school seated themselves in the Quidditch stands and the Ravenclaw and Slyterin teams took their places on the pitch. Lily glanced at the others seated beside her, all of them waiting anxiously for the game to start. The winner of this match would face them in the Semi-finals, and the teams that won those matches would play off in the finals.

The game passed by quickly, and Lily tried her hardest to focus on the match, but something felt off to her. She felt like someone was watching her. She turned her focus back towards the match feeling slightly dizzy as the players flew around and around in circles. Her head felt heavy. In the back of her mind she heard the announcer shout out the score. She registered that Ravenclaw was winning. Sirius said something to her that she didn't hear. Lily felt as if hours had passed. The feeling that someone was watching her kept growing in her mind. Time felt like it was standing still. She felt as if she was leaving her physical body. Lily's mind wandered through the stands, examining the faces of every person. Searching. Searching for someone that didn't belong. Someone that wasn't nearly as focused on the match as the rest of the school. Her head spun. There was laughter. Then, she spotted them. Sitting on the other side of the stands, she saw the head of curly black hair. She was laughing to. Someone was holding onto her and she was struggling to get free. They had come for her again. They were going to kill her just like her parents. The grip tightened around her. There was more laughter. There was the woman's face. And then there was nothing.

XxX

Lily jolted into a sitting position, awaking from a horrible nightmare. Someone was saying her name, but she was too tired to respond, her limbs felt so heavy. Mme Pomfrey briefly came into view as she was helped back into a lying down position. Lily felt a cold liquid fall down her throat, realizing that she must have swallowed something. She heard laughter once again, and drifted into sleep with the familiar head of hair flashing in her mind.

She was walking up the stairs to her flat again, the feeling in her gut nearly dragging her down. The door to her apartment was still ajar, and she felt the weight of the shopping bags she was holding in her hand. It was still dark in her apartment, but she knew no one could see her. There were people in her kitchen, talking about being punished for not having anything to take back with them to someone they called _you-know-who. _Gary was calling her name and came into the apartment. The cloaked figures were going to kill him. She ran over towards him, throwing the invisibility cloak over both of them and pulling him to the ground to avoid the curses. She told him to be quite. She squeezed his hand. Lily suddenly remembered that this had all happened while she was on her own. She knew what was coming. The memory of the pain was fresh in her mind. She knew they wanted information from her, but she didn't have any. She remembers putting up a good fight but falling quickly. She expects the pain to stop, and the woman to disaparate, just like she had done in real life, but it didn't cease. She felt memories fading, she could barely remember her mugglelife by the end of it. What was the name of her best friend at her sisters wedding? Who first told her she was a witch? Did she used to share a room with Petunia? Did she ever meet her grandparents? She willed the pain to stop. And it did. But this time they took her. She felt the pull of disaparation and hit the cold ground. Grass. There was no grass in her apartment.

"We were beginning to worry" an eery voice said.

The shrill woman responded, "I abandoned the others. They went down without a fight"

"You were right to do so then." he replied, "I'll send someone to wipe their memories."

"I brought you a gift"

"I see that" he replied, "It's her?"

"Yes. I imagine she's weak. She's not armed."

"Get her up." he ordered. "I need to have a word with her"

Lily felt someone pull her to her feet and shove her in towards the voice. She was asked questions. She paying the price for not having some answers. They contemplated killing her on the spot. They asked her about the Potters, and about Sirius. They asked her about her position at Hogwarts and how it could help them. They asked her about Dumbledore. They changed their minds about killing her. They told someone to keep a watch on her. She felt the pull of disaparation and landing on the familiar floor of her apartment. Then she found her wand, and some strength. She woke to a cloaked figure disaparating from her living room. And she remembers discovering in her the sudden will to return to Hogwarts. A will, which she was just realizing, wasn't hers to begin with. She was doing fine on her own. She didn't want to go back to Hogwarts. But it appeared as if someone else wanted her there.

XxX

The next time she awoke in the hospital wing, she opened her eyes to see Harold Potter sitting in the chair adjacent to her bed reading that morning profit, and she heard the quite whispers of Mme Pomfrey and Dumbledore from her office.

"Poppy!" Harold Potter said urgently, "She's waking"

Hurried footsteps approached her, and she was helped into a sitting position. Once again something was trust down her throat, but this time she felt a sobering effect.

"What are you feeling Ms. Evans?" Dumbledore asked her, after waiting the appropriate amount of time.

Her head spun, "Dizzy"

"Normal." Mme Pomfrey stated, offering her no other reassurance.

"What happened?" Lily questioned "How long have I been here?"

Harold Potter checked his watch, "More than a day," he replied, "less than a week"

"Is that the short of vagueness I should expect from all of you?"

She wasn't given a response.

Harold Potter moved from his chair to the edge of her bed, offering her an empty vile and her wand. "Lily" he began, "We need you to extract your memories and place them into this vile. It's very simple. Touch the tip of your wand to your temple. Think about what you want us to know. And slowly draw your wand away from your head."

"What do you want to know?"

He heaved a sighed, "We want to know anything and everything you can give us."

She nodded, not bothering to question what they needed from her memories. There was something on the very surface of her mind that she couldn't quite remember. Her dreams were slowly drifting away from her. She did as Harold Potter told her to do and returned the vile to him. He passed it to Dumbledore, who proceeded out of the hospital wing, wishing her a full recovery before closing the door behind him.

"Who won the Quidditch game?" Lily questioned, "Surely you can answer that question."

"Slyterin" Harold replied, offering Mme Pomfrey a shrug as she retreated into her office once more.

"Is Dumbledore forming a secret army?" Lily hadn't realized the question had even occurred to her before she had asked it.

Harold Potter looked at her questioningly, offering her the same shrug as he did to Mme Pomfrey.

"Will you eventually tell me what happened?"

"Eventually"

"When can I leave?"

"When Poppy tells you your safe to leave"

"When can I see James?"

"You saw him this morning"

"I don't remember that"

"Sirius is supposed to come around this afternoon." Harold replied, "Your friends are coming in shifts. They speak with you every time they come, even if you don't remember. They know very little about your situation, so there's no point in asking."

"How many times have we had this conversation?" Lily asked, feeling a weird sense of déjà-vu

"Every time you wake"

"Which is how many times?"

"Seven."

"Funny. I don't remember any of that."

"That's are doing"

"What do you mean?"

"Mme Pomfrey is giving you a potion that is making you forget"

"Why would she want me to forget"

"Because if you're not forgetting, then you're remembering, and we want to know what it is your going to remember before you remember it." He told her, "But there's no need to be frightened. Mme Pomfrey fully intends to restore all of your memories"

Silence fell between them momentarily. No matter how many times he had probably reassured her she was still frightened, because a large part of her didn't want to remember. She had a brief conversation with Sirius before falling back asleep. He looked sad and smelled of cigarette smoke.

* * *

><p>"Okay Ms. Evans" Mme Pomfrey began, "We don't know how much your going to remember, whether some of your memories are lost forever or whether everything will come flooding back in a single moment. Drink the potion and we'll go from there"<p>

Lily drank, and suddenly the her memories of the past four days came flooding back into her mind. She passed out at the Quidditch game after witnessing one of the Marauder's famous pranks. Her friends had been visiting her everyday, and all those conversation came back to her, she remembers nearly peeing herself with laughter a few days ago after a visit from Marlene. She felt like she had before the Quidditch match: oblivious to the bad in her life.

Mme Pomfrey gave her some instructions and informed her that every night she was to sleep in the hospital wing under her supervision, but other than a few warnings, she was ready to let her get back to her life.

Lily went looking for Sirius, remembering the smell of cigarette smoke lingering on his ropes from yesterday and realizing that the hole in her heart was back. She made her way into the Gryffindor common room, curious as to where everyone. She found Marlene in the Marauder's dorm room.

"Lily!" she exclaimed, "Poppy told us you might be let out today! I personally didn't believe her. How are you? How are you feeling?"

"I don't really know what's happened over the past few days." she replied, "Something about Dumbledore needing my memories. Where is everyone?"

"Hogsmede. James scheduled an outing and forced all the other Marauder's to go down to the village with him and get some fresh air."

"Well it's good to know they're not all in her worrying about me."

"They've all taken on a different role. James is leading the entire school, things have gotten bad Lily. Remus is keeping everyone going to classes. Sirius is keeping everyone laughing and I'm keeping track of you."

Lily smiled, feeling her first sense of relief in a long time, "Do you know where Sirius keeps his cigarettes?"

Marlene didn't express any form of shock, instead walked over to his dresser and pulled out a small box. "Let go up to the astronomy tower. I could use some fresh air myself." Marlene said, leading Lily out the door.

Once they had arrived and settled, smoke lingering between the two of them, Lily finally spoke. "Marlene, I need to tell someone what happened when I was away." she told her, "And I don't want you to overreact or pity me or anything. Just listen okay?"

"Okay" Marlene replied.

And Lily began.


	33. Chapter 33

_**Saturday, April 10th**_

Lily awoke with a start, feeling a tight grip on her arm and pain. Slowly the Hospital Wing came into focus in front of her, and she relaxed into her bed. Once again she felt as if she was being watched, and desperately searched around the dark room for the source; begging for it to stop when she realized she was the only one in the Wing. She wished to understand everything that was going on with her. She needed information. She needed closure. She needed her parents.

The door to the Hospital Wing opened slowly, revealing no one. And Lily quickly wiped hot tears from her eyes. "You can take that thing off. I know you're there," Lily said to no one in particular.

She honestly expected James to reveal himself, having spent every moment he could afford at her side over the past week. Instead, she was pleasantly surprised when Remus emerged before her. He smiled and she couldn't help but mirror his emotion.

"Have you found anything out?" She whispered, as Remus took the chair beside her bed.

Remus offered her his hand, which she took. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm feeling alright. I kind of just want to get out of here."

He smiled, pulling her to her feet and throwing the cloak over both of them. "Good thing I've come here to get you. There's something you need to see."

They walked quickly and quietly through the halls. Lily allowed Remus to lead her down many hidden paths and up multiple flights of stairs, without questioning where they were headed. Anywhere was better than the Hospital Wing in her opinion. He turned to her at the top of a hidden staircase, putting his finger to his lips to ensure that she remain quiet. "We don't want to wake the portraits" he told her.

"Where are the others?" Lily asked, however he didn't respond. Instead pushing the door open just enough for them to slip through.

A blue light illuminated from the corner of the room, casting enough light on the office to reveal that they were standing behind Dumbledore's desk. Lily was shocked that Dumbledore had a secret entrance to his office. And, more importantly, that Remus knew about it. But then again, there were a ton of things that the Marauders knew about Hogwarts that she did not. She began to wonder how long they had known about the passage. How many times had they used it to sneak into his office and vanish their detention sheet, or letters from their parents ensuring that they are behaving well. Lily was pulled from her thoughts as Remus directed over towards the object omitting the blue light.

"This is a penseive" Remus informed her, pulling a vile off the shelf and handing it to her.

Lily turned the vile in her hands, revealing the date and her name. It was marked for nearly two weeks ago, the third night she had been admitted to the Hospital Wing. She knew what to do, but didn't know if she could. Remus had found her the information she needed, but now, with it in reach, she wasn't sure if she really wanted to know. Remus, sensing her hesitation, took the vile from her and poured it into the bowl. A cloud of black smoke spread across the water, until the memory floated before her. Remus took her hand, and they feel forward.

They stood idly by in her old apartment as she fought the death eaters, saved someone's life, and was tortured. Remus held her hand tightly through the entire episode. "This is where they leave me," Lily said, but Remus appeared to know better. A big haired death eater took her by the wrist and the scene disappeared before them, to reveal another.

The big haired woman spoke to a snake-like man, words that they couldn't hear. Again, Lily watched herself tortured. They kept demanding things from her, but she didn't know the answers. The memory comes back to her, and Lily remembers wishing that they would simply kill her. She held onto Remus' hand tighter, and he pulled her into his chest.

"You're dying" he said to her, and a small part of her had wished she had. Her memories had returned, and she knew that this wasn't the worst part.

She watched as they continued to torture her, as she begged them to kill her. She watched as she sobbed into the floor, small fragments of her childhood fading away.

"Please!" shouted Penseive Lily, "Please stop! Please make this stop!"

"I want to hear you beg for death" the snake-like man hissed. "I want to hear that you want nothing to do with magic, with the Potters, with your family. I want to hear that you're finished."

The woman laughed as tears continued to run down Lily cheeks. "Come on. Beg like your parents did."

Remus gasped beside her, but Lily was too interested in the scene before her to notice, tears streaming down both of their faces.

"I don't want to see what happens next." She whispered to Remus, knowing in her heart what would happen.

Penseive Lily shook her head. She wasn't going to beg, and she was going to pay for it. Remus walked over to Penseive Lily sitting down beside her, hovering his hand on her back as if he was comforting her. Lily almost remembers the feeling. She joins him on the floor. "Be strong, Lily." Remus tells them both, "You mean the world to me, and you can get through this. I believe in you."

Penseive Lily's screams echoed in their heads until the woman and the man had finally had enough. "Return her, Bellatrix," The snake-like man ordered, and the woman did as she was told.

The apartment appeared before them and Lily and Remus both got to their feet, realizing that the memory would soon be finished. Bellatrix threw Lily to the ground, inches away from her wand. She bent down towards her, putting her wand to her temple. "I could kill you, Mudblood. Right here, and no one would ever find you. But that is not what the dark lord wishes," she whispers into her ear, "You will go back to Hogwarts. You will gather intel on the Head Master and if we seek to enter Hogwarts, you will help us."

The memory vanished, Bellatrix's words echoing in Lily's head as the office comes into focus once more. She realizes that the words aren't from the penseive, but that she actually remembers them. Remus wrapped his arms around her, knowing that her memory was going to be bad, but didn't realize how bad. Dumbledore hadn't warned him for what he just witnessed.

"Thank you, Remus." Lily said, breaking the silence, "For finding my answers."

"I love you, Lily. We all love you."

"I know"

She told Remus, rather firmly, that she would walk back to the Hospital Wing by herself. Lily felt bad for lying, but she needed fresh air, and felt herself drawn towards the tower. Her foot steps echoed behind her, keeping her company on her dark empty journey. She imagined Remus had slipped under the invisibility cloak and followed her, but didn't care. Even the look of being on her own was good enough. She climbed the stairs two at a time, reaching the top in less than a minute. Breathing in the April air, the cold stinging her lungs. She gasped, releasing a heavy weight within her. She finally knew, and that in itself was a relief.

"I imagine you don't want to talk about it" someone said to her, slowly coming out of the shadows.

"Sirius" Lily sighed, "You scared me."

"That wasn't my intention."

He was smoking. Something was wrong. He saw her eying the cigarette in his mouth, out of curiosity or longing, he couldn't tell. He smiled, swinging an arm around her shoulder and guiding her over to their usual spot. On the edge.

"Don't tell James." Sirius said, handing her a cigarette from his pack.

Lily smiled, putting it in her mouth and lighting it with the tip of her wand. "I wouldn't dare."

The two smoked in silence, enjoying the company and watching as the brisk april air danced with their every exhaling breath. Neither of them bothered to make conversation, too immersed in the moment. Lily sighed inwardly, enjoying the familiarity of the situation; this was how they were after her return, he never spoke unless she initiated the conversation, and she never wanted to. After what felt like hours had past, and they had thrown their buds off the top of the tower, she turned to Sirius, now smoking what she believed to be his second. She declined his offer for another.

"How was the village?" Lily asked, leaning her head on his shoulder

"Rubbish." Sirius replied, "Ran into my brother. James and Remus pulled us a part."

"I bet he deserved it"

Sirius nodded, "That's why I like you, Evans. You're always right."

A comfortable silence fell between them. Lily closed her eyes, fully taking in his presence. Their time at Hogwarts was coming to an end, and what faces them beyond these walls are far too real.

"Marlene told me what you told her." Sirius confessed moments later, "I thought you should know."

Lily shrugged, "I probably would've told you anyway. Have you told James?"

Sirius chuckled, "That's definitely not something I want to do."

"Me neither,"

"You love him, right? And you're only up here with me because we're mates, right?"

"We're just mates" Lily replied, a smile playing at her lips.

Sirius shifted so her could see her expression, "Don't get me wrong. If Prongs wasn't head over heals for you, we'd have gotten together by now."

"You'd date me?"

He laughed, "No. I'd shag you."

"I wonder what Marlene would think, hearing you say that."

Sirius shrugged, "I told her. She said all three of us—"

"Don't finish that sentence!" Lily cut across him, "She definitely did not say that."

Sirius mirrored Lily's smirk, "Nah. She didn't. She knows you're too much in love with Prongs to even consider it"

"She knows me well"

"Will you tell him then? Because he's been driving us up the wall for like, six years"

"How about I tell him about everything else first, and then I'll let him decide if he still loves me"

Sirius nodded, "I guess that sounds reasonable"

* * *

><p>The following day, after sneaking back into her bed in the Hospital Wing just as the sun rose, Lily spend her Sunday in the potions lab, having fun concocting her own creations. She had a brief conversation with Professor Slughorn and vacated the room, deciding to make use of the empty dinning hall. Lily sat on her own in her usual spot, enjoying the quite before the school would come flooding in for dinner. She tried to stay focused on her own work, wishing that the other few students in the dinning hall would keep quite. Her eyes were drawn from the table as an owl came screeching into the Great Hall, landing hurriedly down before a student which Lily recognized as a fifth year.<p>

Had Lily been closer she would have recognized the letter, having received a similar one a few months ago. But she wasn't closer, and couldn't prevent the events that followed from unravelling. Almost as if she was watching a reflection of her previous self, she watched as the boy went ridged, the letter falling from his hands and onto the floor. Leaving her things behind, Lily got to her feet.

The boy, crushed by reality, stood from the Ravenclaw table and hurriedly made his way out of the hall. Lily, moving just as quickly, grabbed his letter from the floor and followed him into the depths of the corridor.

She crumpled the letter into her pocket, nervous that she had lost the boy. She continued to search the corridors, checking in closets and classrooms only to find them empty. Lily was beginning to lose hope, and thought she better alert Professor Dumbledore, or better use the Marauder's map to find him. She stopped, and the silence of her echoing footsteps allowed her to hear, what could only be the sound of someone crying.

She found him under a staircase, his head in his hands, his body shaking with tears. Almost instinctively, she rushed to his side, pulling him into her chest. "It's going to be alright" she assured him, over and over again until he slowly began to recover from his initial shock.

Lily remembered her own feelings of grief, feeling overwhelmed as they slowly resurfaced. Her parents, just like this boys, had died at the hands of Death Eaters. She was the only one who understood what he was going throw, the emotions that drove her to leave Hogwarts and everyone that she cared about behind. Lily knew that his place was not out in the danger of the world, but was here at Hogwarts, and understood that it was her job to keep him safe.

"I'm so sorry" he finally whispered, withdrawing from her embrace.

Tears continued to roll silently down his cheeks, which he quickly wiped away, almost as if he was hiding them from her.

"Don't be sorry," Lily countered, "You shouldn't be sorry."

Lily hoped he had heard and understood her, but wasn't going to press on. "What's your name?" she asked

He sniffed, "Bryn Finnigan"

"I'm Lily, and I understand what you're going threw"

"You're Lily Evans?"

"Yes. I've lost, just as you have. And I want to help you, because I know the pain you're feeling"

"I don't want to hurt, Lily."

"I know, but that's the worst thing about pain. It comes when you don't want it to"

"When will I stop hurting?"

Lily smiled a sad smile, "I don't know yet," she replied "But I'll let you know"

He began to cry once more.

"If you ever need anything, just come and find me, okay?" Lily said, getting to her feet.

He looked up at her, his eyes blood shot, "Will you stay with me?"

"Of course" She replied, kneeling back down beside him

"Thank you"

"When you're ready, we'll go and see Professor Dumbledore okay? He's going to make this a lot easier for you"

"Okay"


	34. Chapter 34

Lily sauntered through the corridors, the moonlight casting dark shadows, making figures dance in the corner of her eye. Her stomach churned, as she peered into another cupboard along the corridor and continued on her way, eager to get to familiar light of her dormitory. A few months ago, walking alone in the halls of the castles didn't frighten her, as a matter of fact, she felt comforted by the sound of her own footsteps and the silence that surrounded her. However, the frightening things that she never noticed suddenly became clear. The status of armed soldiers glared at her menacingly, and the sound of silence brought her no comfort. She thought of lighting her wand, but realized that it would only draw attention to her if anyone were lurking around the corner. She fingered her wand in her hand — vigilant. She understood why Remus had been unable to do their normal rounds that evening, and she even encouraged him to take the night off. By the time she had asked James, Marlene, Sirius, and even Peter, to do rounds with her and they had all been unable to come, she had to get onto her rounds.

She sighed, turning the corner and nearly jumping three feet into the air. Her mouth hung open, more so stunned than afraid. Galloping down the halls was a stag; slowly making it's way towards the hidden atrium on the second floor.

"Wait" she said, startled by the weakness in her own voice, "Wait!" she repeated with more confidence, but the stag didn't wait. She tore after it as quietly as she could, realizing that the animal would run away from her if she startled it.

She kept it in sight, slowly gaining on the stag. Although, as she approached, she realized it wasn't galloping, instead walking with a limp. She followed it into the hidden atrium and watched as the stag retreated to a corner. The animal lay down onto the floor, filling the silence with whimpering. Lily instantly understood that something was wrong, and realized that she needed to help the stag in anyway she could. Slowly she made her way over towards it, putting her hands up to show her surrender and making herself appear smaller to ensure that she didn't scare the animal away.

The stag lifted his head, staring at her with great big eyes that seemed familiar. She refrained from laughing at herself: when would she have seen a stag long enough to later recognize his eyes. She moved towards it, speaking quietly, "I can't see that you're hurt." She said, "You don't have to be afraid. I'm going to help you."

The animal nodded his head as if it understood her, and she beckoned forward, kneeling down beside the stag. "I've never healed an animal before." Lily said, as a means to fill the silence. "I've healed rodents and small breaks on humans, but never something this bad on an animal this big. I assume it would be easier on a human, but it would be foolish of me to assume that you could just become one, so I'm going to do my best"

She drew her wand and thought back to her textbook readings, trying to remember if any healing charms were harmful to animals. The stag shifted at her hesitance, slowly getting to its feet and retreating to the shadows.

"Wait" she whispered, "I can help"

She heard shuffling and then the dragging of feet. Lily reversed away from the sound until her back was pressed firmly against the wall of the atrium. She raised her wand.

"Put that bloody thing down," a familiar voice told her. James came into the moonlight, a large gash across his abdomen and another along his spine. Lily's eyes widened in shock, as suddenly everything began to make sense. There was no way the Marauder's would ever let Remus go through his transformations alone; of course they would become animagi to help him through each night.

"How long?"

James drew in sharp breaths, trying to mask the pain from his face. Lily got to her feet as he tried to formulate an answer, drawing her wand and slowly tracing it over his cuts. "Since third year."

"Third year?" She nearly fainted at the idea of third years mastering such complicated magic. "I assume you're unregistered"

He nodded, straightening his posture as the gashes on his back healed together. "Don't tell anyone. No one knows"

"Must be the longest kept secret of the Marauder's, until now that is."

"We've come close before, but never told until now."

"Why did you reveal yourself? I wouldn't have known"

"You said it yourself that it would be easier to heal a human, and I would've rather let you know than die as a stag" James said, "Besides, as far as you know, I'm the only animagus"

"But that's not true"

"True, but I was the first"

"You?"

"Well, I was up against Sirius and Peter"

"Sirius is pretty smart"

"Yeah, now." James countered, "Not third-year Sirius"

He stretched, his muscles rippling causing Lily's knees to weaken. "Is this what happened to Sirius a few months ago?"

"Yes." James replied, "Sometimes he just has bad nights, and we get the worst of it"

"That's not something I want to think about"

"Then don't. Go to bed, Lily. You know there isn't anyone out of bed."

"Are you going back out there?"

"I can't abandon a rat and a dog to look out for a werewolf. I'm the muscle and brains behind this whole operation."

Lily smiled, although it didn't reach her eyes, "Please be careful,"

He mirrored her smile, "I always am"

James turned around, thanking her before transforming into a stag and galloping back through the corridors and out into the Hogwarts grounds. Lily watched his transformation and realized it was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. She felt pride well up within her for her friend's loyalty, and she knew, in that moment, that she would never question the strength of the bond between the four boys.

Slowly her smile faded, and the looming knowledge that she was alone once more overwhelmed her. She quickly cleaned up the atrium and decided to follow James' instruction to retreat to the dormitory, abandoning the rest of her rounds for the first time in all of her years as a prefect.

"Lily" James whispered, putting a hand on her shoulder and shaking her slightly. The sun was just beginning to peak over the horizon, and all his limbs felt heavier than usual, and his back felt stiff after a long night as a much small animal.

She rolled onto her back, her red hair covering her face and the majority of her pillow. "Mmmhmmhmm" she hummed, her eyes fluttering open.

"I just wanted to let you know that we're all back, safe and sound."

She smiled, "You're all back, here?"

"Well, Peter collapsed on the couch downstairs and Sirius stole my bed, so I was on my way to the spare bed in their dormitory and figured I should let you know, in case you were worrying"

"You're going to go all the way to Gryffindor tower?"

James yawned, "That's the plan"

Lily shook her head and grabbed his hand, "Plans change, Potter," she whispered, rolling over to give him her side of the bed.

"Are you sure?"

"Well, how would you ever explain your situation if a professor stopped you in the halls on the way there?"

"I guess I didn't think it through."

She nodded, pulling herself into his side, "Not very smart for the boy that runs the whole operation"

James chuckled, "Please don't tell any of the Marauder's that I said that. I would never hear the end of it."

Lily didn't respond, having fallen back asleep at his side. James smiled down at her, kissing the top of her head, before peacefully drifting to sleep as well.

All too soon, the alarm clock on Lily's bedside table sounded and slowly they both began to wake up. James looked at Lily, hair a mess and mismatched pyjamas, and decided that he liked her best in the morning. She stood, pulling her bed shorts down as far as they could go. She knew he was watching her, and still, he couldn't tare his eyes away from her small figure moving quickly into the washroom.

"I like those shorts" James said through the door, shifting his body up so he lay against the headboard.

Lily poked her head through the door, "Would you mind covering your eyes?"

James raised his eyebrows, but covered them nonetheless, "You did your fair share of staring last night" he said, "I just thought it was fair for me to stare back"

He knew she was blushing, "I didn't think you noticed"

"You weren't exactly subtle about it"

"When did you get so muscular anyway?"

James laughed, peeking through his fingers, catching a glimpse of her bare back. "I've always been this muscular"

"No you haven't"

"You just haven't noticed until now."

Lily slipped on her shoes, fully dressed in her Hogwarts uniform, "You can uncover your eyes," she said, as she ran a hair brush through her hair.

"Where are you headed at this hour of the morning?"

"I'm supposed to meet Madame Pomfrey and Dumbledore in his office in ten minutes." She replied, "Nothing to be worried about though."

"Do you want me to go with you?"

"No, that's alright. You still have an hour or so until breakfast, I'll just see you then"

James nodded, rolling onto his stomach and allowing Lily's smell to engulf him, "Wake Sirius and Peter before you go so they make their way back to their dormitory before students start to fill the corridors."

"Will that take me long?"

"Just don't be polite about it,"

Lily nodded, shutting the door to her bedroom behind her and quickly making her way across the hall to James' room. She peered into the room, expecting to find Sirius curled up in James' bed, surprised when she spotted a black haired dog. She walked over to the curtains, pulling them open to let in the light.

"Evans!" Sirius said, startling her.

She turned around to see his human form, fully clothed and putting his shoes on. He pretended as if she hadn't seen him in his animagus form; the room was dark, there was no way that she could've seen him, "James said I should come in and wake you so you and Peter can get back to your dormitory"

"James, oh Prongs, where did he sleep?" Sirius said, "I told him he could snuggle up with me, but he didn't want to"

Lily shrugged, "I don't always know what James does" she replied, "You should just ask him"

"He slept with you didn't he?"

Lily dropped her gaze to the floor, abruptly changing the topic of conversation to avoid the mockery, "Should I wake Peter, or will you?"

Sirius' smile grew, her reaction having answered his question, "I'll do it. Don't you worry."

"Alright, Sirius," Lily smiled, "I'll see you at breakfast,"

Marlene waited in her Quidditch gear in the Great Hall, nervously waiting with the rest of the team. They were set to play two back to back games, the winner of the first would play Slyterin tomorrow, and the losers would play Ravenclaw immediately after. She was nervous, to say the least, as was the rest of the team. They shuffled in their seats until Remus, Sirius, and James came striding into the Great Hall, and confidently sat down beside them.

"Damn, you can smell the nerves" Sirius said, taking the empty seat next to Marlene.

"What if we lose today?" Andrews whispered from across the table "What if we come forth in the cup?"

James cleared his throat, glaring at Andrews with his eyebrows raised, "No more what ifs from any of you." He told them firmly, "We're going to win against Hufflepuff; I can feel it in my bones"

"What about Slyterin?" Andrews replied, but James had already gone back to his breakfast.

Lily who had overheard their conversation, sat down across from Marlene and Sirius, and said "I'm sure you'll do great today. Whether you win or lose, you should make sure you have a good time. After all this is the last set of Hogwarts Quidditch matches for the majority of you"

The majority of students who walked by the team wished them good luck in their first match, which seemed to only add pressure. They ate quickly at their captain's request; James was eager to get the team warmed up, knowing that a once they got started they would forget about their nervousness. Lily opted to stay behind, deciding that she would go down to the pitch with the rest of the school. The team got up and quickly began to make their way from the Great Hall, but Remus lingered behind momentarily. His eyes were closed tightly, allowing his face to truly display the amount of discomfort and pain he was in.

"Remus—" Lily began, but he was shaking his head.

"I can't stay behind today." He told her, "I wish I could. But I can't let them down"

"They would understand"

"No, they wouldn't."

Lily sighed, knowing that she wasn't going to be able to convince him, "Is there anything I can do for you?"

He got to his feet, with a fair amount of difficulty, taking the hand that Lily offered him. "Actually, there might be. I need something to numb the pain, a spell or potion or anything."

"I'll find you something" she assured him, "How much time do I have?"

Remus checked his watch, "A little over an hour,"

"Okay go." Lily told him, "And while you're waiting, try and at least get on your broom"

He laughed, and she quickly retreated from the Great Hall, knowing that she had very little time to waste.

After a very quick stop to the Head's dormitory, Lily used the many secret passages the Marauder's had shown her to make it up to the Hospital Wing. She realized that there was a more honest way to get the potion she needed, but she knew time was her biggest concern, and stealing it was definitely the fastest way. She threw James' invisibility cloak over herself and quietly pushed the doors to the Hospital Wing open. Lily assumed that Madame Pomfrey was still at breakfast when she realized that her office was empty. She crept into the back room and searched around for a specific potion that she knew had been used to relieve her pain when she stayed in the Wing. She soon realized that there was none in sight, and decided that it would be better to find something else to help Remus with his pain than to continue to waste the little time she had.

The next thing she knew she was running down to the dungeons, into her potions class room, figuring that Professor Slughorn would have a type of bean sprout that also functions as a pain reliever. She knocked quickly on his door, feeling disheartened when no one answered. Lily pulled out her wand, pointing it directly at the locked door. With one flick it opened nicely, and she quickly entered the office, making sure to close the door behind her. She began pulling open various drawers, checking her watch every few moments as the match drew nearer and nearer.

"Ms. Evans" Professor Slughorn said, startling her from behind. "Was I supposed to meet with you this morning? I'm afraid I may have forgotten"

"No, no. Nothing of the sorts, Sir." Lily replied, "I actually came down here looking for something, and when you weren't here… well I figured you wouldn't mind"

"No, definitely not my dear. I'm always glad to give help to fellow members of my Slugclub." He replied, "How can I be of service?"

"Well Sir, I remembered you spoke with me about _Barnius Draconus, _and it's numerous properties that included, if I'm not mistaken, the ability to relieve great pain"

He smiled in return, "Ms. Evan's I— if you're in pain, I would rather think Madame Pomfrey is best suited to help you."

"I realized that, Sir. But I was actually planning to boil the beans down, so that someone could drink them."

"Ah." Slughorn nodded, a smile playing on his lips, "Ms. Evan's, brewing on a Saturday, I can assure you that I'm extremely impressed."

"Thank you, Sir"

"But if I could make a suggestion," He said, grabbing various supplies from around the room, "I would urge you to brew from _Doctor Pumpers book of complicated brewings, _the pain relief potion lasts longer than any other… Here, let me help you."

"Sir, I'm kind of in a hurry"

"Yes, well. This shouldn't take very long." He replied, "It only takes thirty minutes to brew and five minutes to cool"

She picked up his copy of the textbook, and collected the remainder of the ingredients that the potion called for. Slughorn sat across from her as she mixed the potion, completely transfixed as many usually became when they watched her work. Lily barely referred to the text, knowing all the signs that were associated when it came to brewing a potion, and after thirty minutes of hard work, the potion finally turned to its familiar shade of lilac. Lily took the pot off the heat, and thanked her professor for allowing her to brew on a Saturday. She checked her watch, and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Where is Lily?" Remus questioned, peering out of the changeroom door for the third time in the past five minutes. The other team members were grabbing their brooms and making their way out into the stadium.

"I'm sure she's already in the stands!" James said, clapping him on the back. Remus bit down hard on his lip to prevent himself from crying out in pain. "There's no way she would miss the championship games"

"She was supposed to come down and bring me something," Remus told him, taking his broom from James, who had brought it over to him.

"What's she bringing you?"

Remus shook his head, "Nothing, it's not important"

"It seemed important a few seconds ago, Moony"

"Well it's not" Remus snapped, leading the way out of the changerooms.

They waited in the corridor like they had many times before, the entire teams nervousness now replaced with excitement. They stood in silence, waiting for their names to be announced and the door to open. Remus tried to mount his broom without revealing his pain, but appeared to be having trouble.

"Alright there, Moony?" Sirius asked from behind him

He shook his head, ready to confess his secret, when he heard someone call his name. He thrust his broom into Sirius' hands and walked hurriedly down the hallway towards the noise. "Lily?" he yelled back, hearing her footsteps grow closer and closer.

"Oh good" she said, turning the corner and spotting him, "I thought I'd missed you"

"Remus!" He heard James shout from the distance.

"Did you find something?" Remus said, ignoring his captain's demands.

Lily nodded, handing him the cauldron, "This should work,"

"What if it doesn't?"

"It will. Trust me."

"Okay fine." Remus said, taking the ladle from her hand and drinking the potion, "I've got nothing to loose"

"Lupin!" James hollered once more

Remus smiled, quickly hugging Lily as a thank you and running back down towards the team. He was still a few paces from the when the doors opened and the Gryffindor team kicked off of the ground. As they began to move, Sirius threw him his broom. Remus jumped into the air and caught it, flying out alongside him.

"James is going to kill you," Sirius told him before flying over to his position in the circle.

Remus could already feel the effects of the potion, and he felt stronger than ever before. He could feel each muscle, where the pain radiated from, expanding and contracting. He felt better all over, even in places that he didn't know where hurting. He was nervous going into the game because he didn't think that he would be able to play to his full potential, but now Remus felt excited. He was going to make his team proud, having let them down so many times before by missing practices and games.

He watched as James and Amos shook hands, each of them trying to hurt the other while masking their own pain. Remus smiled when Amos was first to drop the handshake. Madame Hooch quickly went over her rules about rough play as the captain's flew back into their position. Remus smiled at James, who was looking nervous now, and the two boys shared knowing looks that this was their game. The whistle blew and the balls were released.

"Hufflepuff with the quaffle!" the announcer said into his wand, "These two teams have been ruthless with each other all season, and it all comes down to this. In case you've forgotten, the winner of this match will face off tomorrow against Slyterin for the championship match, where first place and forth place will be determined, and the losers will face off with Ravenclaw to determine the second and third positions. This should at least be an interesting game, folks"

"Gryffindor intercepts the quaffle," she continued, "James Potter has put a lot of work into building the perfect Quidditch team; a lot of morning practices I hear. I'm glad to see Remus Lupin back on the pitch, that boy has been in and out of the Hospital Wing more than anyone I know. The three chasers work amazing together, Bloomsburry bringing them together. Black and Mckinnon are strong than ever, both in their relationship and in their playing. I haven't seen Andrews let in a goal in weeks, and Johnson's new glasses give him eyes like a hawk."

"Remus with the quaffle: look how fast he's going. Going for a goal. No wait, he passes to Bloomsburry, she shoot. Goal! 10 points to Gryffindor"

Lily stood on the Hogwarts grounds, hearing the Gryffindor's cheer as they scored the first goal of the match. She smiled, proud of Remus' determination, and happy that the potion seemed to work almost instantaneously. She retreated to the Hogwarts castle, fighting the urge to abandon her responsibilities and go watch the game. She had promised Dumbledore that she wouldn't go to the Quidditch match, and instead visit him this evening. She pushed open the castle doors and made her way inside the castle. Lily felt guilty for missing the match, but knew that Dumbledore wouldn't have asked her to unless it was incredibly important.

She said the password to the statue in front of his office, which was quick to let her through and reveal the hidden staircase. The door was propped open for her, and it closed behind her when she entered the headmaster's office.

A few people were waiting for her when she entered, some of who she recognized to be Mr. Potter and Mrs. Potter, Professor McGonagall, and Dumbeldore. "Ms. Evan's," he said, conjuring her a chair, "I would like to introduce you to, Alastor Moody and Julianne Turner. You already know Mr. and Mrs. Potter, and of course, Professor McGonagall. We have some things to discuss with you, and although we might not all agree that you should know, we all feel as if we have an obligation to provide you with the truth as we feel responsible for the events that transpired a few weeks ago."

Lily sat down, smiling at Mr. and Mrs. Potter as she did. The man that was called Alastor Moody was first to speak, "Ms. Evans, have you ever heard of an unbreakable vow?"

"Yes,"

"Well, the information that we are about to give you is nothing that can be shared, not even with your closest friends. Upon your approval, we are going to administer an unbreakable vow between you and another person present in this room."

"Who will that other person be?"

"That is your choice" he replied, "All of the people in this room have made similar vows with other witches and wizards, and we would highly request that you do the same so we are permitted to be perfectly honest with you"

"I will"

Moody smiled and began to draw his wand but Mrs. Potter interrupted, "Lily" she said, "I want you to think about this. I want you to truly consider the decision that you're making. I want to ensure that you fully understand the consequences if you break the vow."

"I die" Lily said,

"And you're aware that if ever asked, you will have to lie, even to those you love?" Mr. Potter questioned

"I'm aware"

"Enough of this," Moody interrupted, "She's clear about the consequences. Who will you do the vow with?"

Lily looked around the room, contemplating every person. "You"

Everyone in the room failed to mask their surprise, having assumed that she would choose someone closer to her, but nonetheless, Dumbledore drew his wand and Alystor Moody offered her his wrist. Dumbledore cast a silencing charm around his office, and pointed his wand at their joined wrists.

"Will you, Lillian Evans, to the best of your ability, keep all information about the Order from the ears of anyone outside of these very office"

Lily spoke clearly, "I Will"

"And will you, keep the identity of those within the order a secret to anyone outside of these walls"

"I will"

"And will you, keep all information concerning the Order meetings a secret from anyone outside of these walls"

"I will"

With their fleeting words, the white bidding tightened around their wrists until it sank within their skin. Alastor Moody drew his wrist from hers and placed his hand back into his pocket. The room was silent as those who had been standing retook their seats around the Headmaster's office. "The wisest place to start from would be your attack, and why we believed it happened" Dumbledore began, drawing the attention of all within his office.

"I thought it was because of my blood" Lily interjected.

"Yes, although your blood status may have played a part in your targeting, it is important to understand that there are deeper reasons as to why Lord Voldemort would wish death upon a teenaged girl."

Lily gazed out the window in the direction of the Quidditch pitch, wishing to be in the stands with her fellow Gryffindors, but knowing in her heart that there were much more important matters to be dealt with. In turn, James scanned the stands for his favourite redhead upon scoring his tenth goal, giving them a 30 point lead over Hufflepuff. He forced his attention back to the match, vowing to stay focused until the last second. He sped up to Remus, who was weaving his way back through the Hufflepuff players with the Quaffle. James caught a pass from Remus, and looked for an opening, throwing the Quaffle to Hailie hovering below him. Amos went right, but Hailie threw towards the middle.

Amelia shouted into the microphone, unable to contain her excitement, "150-110"

Marlene scanned the pitch, her bat ready. The Hufflepuff beaters were ruthless, and even though the rules explicitly stated that all hits must be directed towards brooms and not their riders, she knew that they were aiming to knock the Gryffindor players right out of the game. She kept her eye on the bludgers, ready to move in case they got too close to her team. She watched Sirius send a bludger flying back towards the opposing team, she smirked as it nearly knocked one of Hufflepuffs beaters off their broomstick. However, the bludger was hit back towards her just as fast as Sirius hit it towards them. She prepared to swing, but before she made contact with the bludger she felt a sharp pain in her left arm and began plummeting towards the ground as her broomstick split in two. Someone above her screamed loudly just as everything faded to black.

Madame Hooch was quick to call James' time out, and the Gryffindor team quickly dismounted their brooms. James grabbed Hailie by the shirt and dragged her towards where Marlene had been taken, putting up his hand to stop the others from coming along.

"Quickly now," James hurried Bloomsburry along.

"I can manage on my own, thank you," She cut across, brushing his hand from her shoulder and keeping with his pace.

They opened the changeroom doors to find Madame Pomfrey kneeling over a slightly conscious Marlene. "What's the verdict, Poppy?" James demanded, stepping closer, but keeping his distance from the healer.

"Well, she's not going to play, if that's what you want to know. Her arm is broken, and she hasn't fully come to." She replied.

James heaved a sigh, ignoring Marlene's incoherent mumbling in which he imagined her trying to convince them to let her play the remainder of the game. He ran a shaky hand through his hair, and turned towards Hailie with his arms crossed across his chest. "Alright, Bloomsburry." He began, "What are you thinking?"

"Is this a test?" Hailie asked,

He rolled his eyes in response, and she continued, "Alright, well, we don't have any other players, or know of anyone to replace Marlene to an acceptable standard. Hufflepuff has definitely realized this and are going to take advantage of having an extra player, and may even try to get a few more of our players out of the game."

"That much can be assumed" James said,

"Which means that Remus should join Sirius as a beater for the remainder of the game because we're allowed to make temporary changes due to injury —as stated in paragraph 3 on page 15 of the Quidditch rule book— and you and I will do our best to be a distraction to the Hufflepuff team, their seeker in particular, to give Andrews enough time to find and catch the snitch."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

James smiled, "Well, it's a little more complicated than I would've liked, but I'll take it." He replied, pushing her towards the exit, "Now, go tell the team. I'll be there in a second"

Hailie ran out of the changeroom, and James made his way over towards Marlene. "Jesus McKinnon," He whispered, "Impressive injury, if I do say so myself."

Marlene smiled, but didn't say anything.

"I hate when the teams play dirty." James continued, "A good Quidditch game isn't counted in how many people you knock off their broom. Thanks for the great job today Marlene, but we'll take it from here okay? We'll win the game for you, so you can redeem yourself tomorrow against Slytherin."

The game didn't continue for very much longer as Hailie's creative problem solving went according to plan. She and James managed to fly enough circles around Hufflepuff's seeker to make him too dizzy to find the snitch, and Remus managed to keep the bludgers at bay alongside Sirius while Andrews caught the snitch. The final score was 300-130, leaving Hufflepuff to face Ravenclaw later in the week, and Gryffindor to play against Slyterin in the final match closer to the end of the year.

Lily stepped out of the castle just in time to hear the final whistle blow, and decided that she would wait for the victory march to storm through the castle before congratulating whichever team had won. She felt guilty for missing another Quidditch game, but upon looking down at her hand and seeing the left other markings from the unbreakable vow, realized that certain things were more important than the match. Although, she knew James and her friends would be disappointed that she wasn't there, she knew that eventually, when the same secrets were shared with them, they would understand.


	35. Chapter 35

Lily hit the ground, hard. The books in her hands sliding in all different directions down the hallway. Her head pounded, but she was almost certain she hadn't hit it against the floor. The pain moved slowly from her head, down her neck, into her chest, through her stomach, into her hips, across her legs, and down into her toes. The image of herself lying on the cold floor beneath the dark wizards flashed through her mind, but she was quickly pulled back to reality by a soft voice and a cold hand on her shoulder.

"Lily," Bryn said, helping her to her feet, "Get up, girl. Come on, I'll help you get your books."

"I don't even know what happened," She replied, scanning the crowded halls.

He shrugged, handing her the remainder of her books. "The most important thing is that you're alright. It looked as if you hit your head against the wall" He continued, "Did you want to go and see Madame Pomfrey? I don't mind missing the beginning of potions to walk you there. Professor Slughorn will surely understand."

Lily shook her head, bringing her wand to her head. Bryn watched in amazement, unable to tare his eyes away from the witch as she proceeded to heal the small wound on her forehead without having seen it. He watched as the skin wove itself back together and returned to its normal state.

"How is that even possible?" Bryn asked, "You couldn't even see your forehead... You didn't even know what the cut looked like..."

"Magic has never been about seeing, Bryn." Lily replied, "The sooner you learn that the better you'll become"

"What do you mean?" He replied, "How can you cast a spell without seeing what you're doing..?"

"Magic is about knowing and feeling." She replied, "I can't explain it... You'll figure it out eventually, I'm sure"

"Well either way, I assume that you no longer need to go to the nurse then?" Bryn continued, "I assume that's for the better, Professor Slughorn definitely doesn't appreciate it when I'm late. Now, if you're alright, I'm going to get on my way... maybe this time I'll arrive only a few minutes late."

"Go on then."

Lily watched him round the corner and scanned the crowd for the scene she had been observing before clumsily falling to the ground, but was disappointed to see that the two people had disappeared into the crowd of Hogwarts students on their way to their last class of the day. She checked her watch and decided that she could spare to be a few minutes late. Quickly, she began to walk towards the spot she had last seen them, in hopes to find the pair once more. She scanned the crowd for the familiar head of messy black hair that she had become so accustomed to seeing, but saw no sign of it. Time continued to pass and although she knew that she shouldn't be late for class, Lily couldn't push herself to move from her spot.

For the first time in months, Lily finally understood what it was she truly wanted, and just as before it was about to be taken away from her. _I should just tell him, _she argued with herself. _He deserves to know the truth... He deserves to know everything before he can take me for who I am. _She understood what had to be done, but couldn't find the courage within herself to tell James everything he needed to know. _He can't ever love someone who is as damaged as I am, and now that I've been the exact information the Death Eater's were trying to get from me before, he's at an even bigger risk just being around me. _

The second bell rang and Lily was pulled from her thoughts. The students had all piled into their classes, leaving the halls completely deserted. She quickly rounded the corner and made her way to Defense Against the Dark Arts. She slipped through the door and into her seat beside Alice, just as the professor had begun the lesson.

"I'm glad you decided to finally show up" Alice said, "I was beginning to worry"

"I just got caught up in the halls," Lily replied, she made to continue but found her attention drawn towards the other side of the classroom as James marched over towards his desk and irritatedly took his seat beside Sirius.

Alice raised her eyebrows, "Caught up in the halls?" she continued, "Not with, dare I say his name, James Potter?"

"No, no." Lily said, her eyes still glued to James who was ignoring Sirius' attempts to understand what had gotten him in such a huff. "Not directly at least."

"So you both just happened to be late for completely different reasons?"

"Is that so incredibly hard to believe?"

"Yes." Alice replied, but her voice was accompanied by Marlene's, who had been listening to their conversation from in front of them.

Lily glared at them both, and tried her hardest to focus on the lesson. She pulled out the notes she had taken on the chapter, having read it a few weeks prior, and followed along with the professor to ensure that she hadn't missed anything important. Although, as the professor continued to drone on, Lily found it harder to ignore Alice and Marlene. "All we really want is to understand" Marlene whispered under her breath, "You and Potter have been pretty close lately and he surely doesn't seem happy about something... You can't blame us for making assumptions."

"There's nothing to it," Lily replied, "I may have stumbled upon something that I probably wasn't supposed to see, then tripped and sent my books flying across the halls"

"You tripped?" Alice asked, "Are you alright?"

"Minor cut and bruises... nothing to be worried about."

"Oh for the love of Merlin," Marlene hissed, "What did you see?"

"I don't know what they were talking about because by the time I decided to try and get close enough to hear what they were saying, they had disappeared. Trust me though, based on his reaction and who he was talking to, it definitely was not good news." Lily said, and ushered the girls to lean in closer, "I think James and Jessica might be getting back together, or reconnecting somehow."

"What?" Marlene and Alice shouted in unison, causing the majority of the class to turn their way, including James and Sirius.

"You can't be serious!" Alice continued in a whisper, "He wouldn't..."

"I'm just telling you what I think I saw." Lily said, "She looked pleading and he looked understanding, and then they disappeared moments later, so for all we know they had a brief snog and then jogged off to class."

"I don't believe it." Marlene replied, she directed the girl's attention towards James, "If I had just snogged someone, there's no way I would be baring that expression"

They both nodded, but neither seemed convinced. "Maybe he's just conflicted," Alice countered, "I mean, Lily and James have been getting pretty close ever since she's been back, and he might just be feeling extremely guilty because he feels like he'd be abandoning her if he got back together with Jessica. After all, he's probably thinking that Lily is just going to reject him again at the end of this year and he's probably tired of being alone. Besides, there's all the added pressure from the pureblood line to marry and have children right out of school..."

"What?" Lily demanded.

Marlene glared at Alice, and quickly made to reassure Lily, "James' parents aren't like that, they're not pressuring him into anything. He's definitely not interested in getting married right out of school and having children, especially not with Jessica. God, she's a nightmare."

Lily put her head in her hands, "I'm screwed," She muttered under her breath, "I'm totally screwed."

Lily kept her hand on her desk for the remainder of class, and ran out of the room the minute the bell rang. She knew that she had to tell James about everything that had happened, but now, after seeing him and Jessica, she realized that after hearing everything she had to say he would most likely run into her arms. She felt extremely defeated and quickly made her way to the astronomy tower, which her friends had come to recognize as a place she needed to be left alone. All except one of course. She burst through the heavy door and let the afternoon air surround her. Lily took a few deep breaths, allowing herself to calm down. After a few minutes she worked her way around the brick near the door, until she found Sirius' secret hiding spot. She shimmied one of the bricks out from the wall and plunged her hand into the space it left, withdrawing a half empty box of cigarettes moments later. She lit one and sat in her favourite spot, letting her feet dangle over the edge.

The smoke danced in front of her and with every passing moment she felt better. Lily's head found the stone pillar on her left, and she relaxed into the scene before her. The sun had just begun to fall past the trees, painting the sky with bright pinks that faded into deep blues. Lily felt invincible, she leaned forward over the edge, the metal handrail digging further into her chest to keep her from falling over, and looked down over the grounds. Lily thought back to her years at Hogwarts, realizing that she never fully appreciated the safety and security it granted her. Beyond the gates and the magical barriers was a world full of pain and suffering, but there, looking over the grounds, she felt far from the harsh reality of what awaited her on the other side. She felt peaceful for the first time in weeks.

Behind her the door to the astronomy tower opened, and a familiar pair of footsteps came up beside her. "I figured you might be up here" Sirius said, pulling a cigarette from his sweater pocket. "Marlene mentioned something about a catastrophe, but I wasn't really interested in listening to her gossip today to be perfectly honest."

Lily lifted her head to acknowledge him, but didn't bother starting up a conversation. They sat together, taking in the view and enjoying the comfortable silence. Sirius was one of the few people with who Lily felt relaxed, she felt as if he wasn't constantly studying her and trying to piece her back together. Sirius understood what it felt like to have everything and then have it all ripped from you within a matter of seconds. Lily remembers returning to school in her sixth year and being shocked by the change in his character, after running away from home and disowning his family, Sirius was able to grow into the person he truly wanted to become. Lily hoped that she would undergo a similar change, that she would be able to become a bigger and better person.

"My heart hurts, Sirius" Lily whispered, "It hasn't stopped hurting since I got that letter."

He wrapped his arm around her, pulling her into his side. "I know" he replied, exhaling smoke into the air.

"There's just the hole inside my chest and every time I try to patch myself up it just gets bigger." Lily continued, "How I am supposed to do all these great things and help people if I can't even help myself?"

Sirius sighed, "What I've come to learn from pain is that it never goes away. Trust me, you can try and you can try again, but it will always be lurking in the background. I tried extremely hard to get over the guilt and the pain I felt from leaving my brother behind to deal with my god awful parents, but every time I see him walking the halls everything comes rushing back to me. It's nearly been three years since I skipped out on him and I still see the hatred in his eyes when I run into him. To be honest, I deserve every bit of his anger and his violence, I promised him that I would always have his back and I sure as hell wasn't true to my word. What James will never understand is that I see the person I would've become when I see him, I see the hatred and the pureblood way, and I know I failed him. Reg was such an amazing brother, and I never returned the favour. He cornered me today on the way to the dungeons, he said all these horrible things about me and made me realize something. Everything that he was saying to me was real to him, all the lies that my parents fed him about who I truly was have become his reality. He'll never understand the real reason behind the decision I made, and he'll never forgive me. He'll die hating me. He definitely doesn't have a lot of time left if he's gotten involved with the people that my parents told me about. My brother's going to die thinking that I'm the worst person in the world. How am I supposed to live with that? I should've been the person he looked up to and wanting to be like when he grew up, I should've been there for him."

They sat together in each others arms in silence, happy to share the weight of the world if only for a few moments. "One day he'll understand, Sirius." Lily whispered, but Sirius made no further effort to add to the topic of conversation.

He cleared his throat, staring at the cigarette in his hands, "Are you going to tell me why you're up here then?" He probed moments later, "I've never seen you smoke more than one, and you're almost on your third, so it has got to be something big."

Lily shrugged, surprised that he had been so observant. Truthfully, she couldn't put her finger on exactly why she was upset, obviously seeing James and Jessica that morning had been a contributing factor; she was feeling stressed because of school; she was now entrusted with this huge secret; she was sure that she would soon crack under the pressure of having to tell her friends the events of what really happened while she was away. "Everything was a lot easier when I couldn't remember anything that had happened," Lily said. "It's all just a little too much to take right now."

"It might help to put it in words," Sirius replied. "And I don't mean you need to tell anyone, you could try writing it down."

"The reality of everything just came crashing down today." She continued. "Now that I remember, I have to tell people what happened while I was away. I know you're all expecting me to and you all deserve a proper explanation, but I'm afraid of how you'll react... I'm scared that you'll... that James will..."

"Leave you." Sirius finished. "You think that it'll be too much to handle."

"I mean, Remus knows." She said. "He helped me figure out what happened and was there when it all came rushing back. He understands what it feels like to be rejected for something that you have no control over and he would have never left me because I stayed by his side when I found out. How can I be sure that all of you won't leave? James might realize that all of my baggage is too much to handle and I might push him away. But I know that I can't ask him to love me if he doesn't know what happened. And now with Jessica..."

"What?" Sirius interrupted. "What happened with Jessica?"

"I don't really know." Lily said. "I saw them speaking in the halls before Defense and, well, things weren't looking good for me"

"There's no way." He continued. "First of all, she was a complete lunatic and James finally accepted that. Second of all, she cheated on him multiple times while they were together. I caught her with different six years numerous times and James didn't believe me until I dragged him to a broom closet the night before the Christmas break. She told him that she figured it was okay because he was hooking up with you, and didn't believe him when he told her he had been completely faithful. There's no way he would ever forgive her for something like that. I think the final count of how many times she cheated was around fifteen."

"Well, it looked like he forgave her." Lily countered. "It was utterly heartbreaking to see them together this morning. And then I realized that I was going to have to tell him, like today."

"You tell him when you're ready. James understands that its been hard for you."

"They're using me, Sirius." Lily said. "The dark whatever can somehow control me. They're planning on breaking into Hogwarts for some reason and I'm helping them, I don't know how or why, but I know that this women commanded me to help and somehow I have been. They broke into my apartment and I tried to fight them off and save a stranger who had somehow wandered into them, I thought I won and they ran, but I just couldn't remember. The women who commanded me was there that night and aparated me to a secondary location where she and the dark wizard tortured for information that I didn't have. I begged for death to take me because it would have be easier. How am I supposed to live with myself knowing that I could be the one to hurt everyone I care about? How am I supposed to stay here?"

"Lily, beautiful Flower." Sirius said. "There is no way they have control over you. You are too strong. You have too much love and kindness in your heart to be taken over by something so dark. As long as you stay true to who you are, nothing can stop you. I'm more familiar with dark magic than I'd like to admit, and trust me, every curse has its limits and a strong heart is one of them. You didn't give up that night because you knew in your heart that there was something worth fighting for, and it's that same thing that will free you from their grasp. I promise."

"I'm scared that I'm going to be the one to hurt everyone that is close to me."

"I won't let that happen, and I'll let Moony know so both of us can be on the lookout."

"Whatever it takes?"

Sirius nodded, "Whatever it takes."

"Even if you had to kill me?"

* * *

><p>Harold Potter checked his watch and heaved a great sigh. His wife would be expecting him home any minute, but unfortunately he found himself seated at his desk in the Ministry of Magic's Auror Office with at least another two hours of paper work to complete. There were many Aurors in his department that valued their own lives over the dangers of their job during a time when a series of Darker wizards and witches targeted them specifically. He envied their ability to walk away from their job and live a more peaceful life at home with their family, something that he doubted he would ever be able to do himself. Not only did he value fighting for a better world, but he was also one of the primary contacts between the Order and the Ministry, not that they even know the Order exists.<p>

There was a rapping on the other side of his office door and he quickly unlocked it with a flick of his wand, ushering the men on the other side to enter. "Harold Potter." Fabian Prewett said, entering the office and taking a seat opposite to him, his brother only a few steps behind. "We've just been to see Dumbledore."

Harold waved his wand and the door closed and locked behind them. "Had to stay out of the eyes of the students, which was harder than you think." Gideon continued.

"You managed to move everything then, I assume?" Harold questioned, well informed of the reason the Prewett boys had visited Hogwarts that evening having sent them himself.

"No one will ever find it." Fabian replied, "Unless of course, you know where to look."

"Which no one other than us does." Gideon added.

They made idle conversation, talking briefly of the Prewett family and their younger sister, Molly, who expressed constant interest in her brothers wereabouts as they often disappeared for nights at a time. Harold told them of his wife and how she intended to start helping the Order once more, she was feeling much healthier having taken the necessary time away to recover after an attack a few months ago.

"Well, I personally can't wait for Clara to come back to the Order. She's wonderful company when we're put on guard duty and I can trust her to have my back if anything bad were to happen." Fabian said.

"We'd love to have you both over for dinner sometime." Harold said. "Bring Molly even! I'm sure it won't be long until she's fighting alongside you"

Both brothers shook their heads vigorously, "No, no." Gideon said. "Definitely not. With mum and dad gone we've got to look out for her."

"It's far too dangerous" Fabian added.

Harold smirked, "I used to think that about Clara. I'm a little protective of her, you could say. But what I learned is that if she really wants to fight, nothing I say or do will stop her from joining, and I imagine that to be the same with Molly."

"We'll bring her to dinner" Fabian agreed.

"But we make no promises that she'll be joining" Gideon countered.

Beyond the closed door to Harold's office lay an impending danger. Unbeknownst to the Order of the Pheonix, the authority of the ministry had shifted a few days prior, and all government movement was directed by the Dark Lord and the minions who followed him. Their ultimate goal was to kill those who opposed, capture the Auror corporation, and implement a new system of justice that favoured the pure, and only them. The dark witches and wizards had slowly infiltrated the ministry, gaining information and the trust of their coworkers. The three men instead the office were distracted by the comfort of the others presence, and only noticed the shift in the atmosphere once it was too late. Fabian directed their attention out the window, to the atrium below, as the many ministry workers below ran around in a panic. Harold was the first of the three to spot those responsible, directing the young boys attention to the three dozen, at that time, masked and cloaked figures. They were quick to move, Harold supplying the two brothers with precis instruction before sending them on their way. "Retreat to the castle, and grab any of the other members you see on the way. The castle is our priority and they will no doubt be there shortly. Do not stop for anyone. Now, go." Harold said.

He knew full well that they had an extremely limited amount of time to get out of the building undetected. Harold didn't follow them, although he promised them he would. He, along with Alastor Moody, understood their duty to the ministry was to protect the innocent and to relay information back to Dumbledore. They were the captains of the ship, and would go down with it if they had to. Harold closed his eyes and distanced himself from the situation at hand, focusing instead on one of the happiest moments of his life. He had been in a rush, late for Herbology, and ran right into her. She apologized to him even though it had been his fault. He remembers watching her run in the opposite direction and thinking that she was the most beautiful person he had ever seen. Harold opened his eyes, smiling at the memory, and watched as a two Penguins burst from his wand.

The first went to his wife, "They've infiltrated the ministry. Go to Hogwarts, find the Prewetts and protect Lily Evans. I love you."

The second to Dumbledore, "Down with the ship, Albus."

He watched as the Penguins dove into the air as if it was water, and went on their way. With his wand at his side, Harold ran from his office and made his way down to the Department of Mysteries, were he knew he would find Alastor Moody. He hoped they would still be in the atrium, freeing up the back corridors to grant him access to the lower levels. He felt extremely lucky to have avoided all of the masked wizards and witches, and almost felt relieved when he spotted Moody standing with two other wizards before the door to the department. He raised his wand in their direction, pointing it directly at Alastor, as he was the only one to raise his own.

"Who won the Quidditch match on the day we visited Hogwarts to speak to Ms. Evans?" Alastor demanded

Harold smiled, "Gryffindor of course."

The two wizards lowered their wands, but didn't put them away. Alastor turned towards the two wizards by the door, "Harold Potter, this is Benji Fenwick and Edgar Bones, the lucky bastards who were on duty this fine evening." Moody said, before turning to them and demanding whether they actually knew what they were protecting.

"Yes, but we don't know where it is" replied Benji.

"Ideally, no one get through this door," Harold replied, "But sometimes things don't necessarily go according to plan."

He stood with his back to the door, alongside Alastor, in front of the younger wizards. His tall slender figure contrasting against Alastors shorter and stout shape. They had been partners for long enough to understand the other with very little communication. "If loss is inevitable," Harold continued, "You two will retreat into the department, go straight to the exit, and proceed to Hogwarts where you will await further instruction from Dumbledore."

The two boys agreed, each happy that the older wizards couldn't see the fear in their eyes. They gave each other disconcerting looks and returning their gaze to the corridor in front of them.

They waited for what felt like hours... then finally what they feared most, rounded the corner and proceeded straight towards them.

* * *

><p>Lily and Sirius had continue to enjoy each others company in silence, soaking in the world around them as the sun set on a familiar scene. Lily had felt at ease, happy to sit on the top of the astronomy tower all night, but knew that wouldn't be a possibility. Over the past few minutes, she felt an ache in her head growing stronger and stronger. She glanced at Sirius and tired to speak, but no words escaped her mouth. The pain grew stronger, blurring and distorting her vision so much that other rooms and events began to swam before her. Wizards and witches of all ages were running from her in fear, desperately trying to find an exit. A wand, that appeared to be in her own hand, raised in front of her, and Lily willed the figure not to fire. Although, much to her horror, many of the terrified witches and wizards were killed.<p>

The Hogwarts grounds blended into the scene, almost as if it was trying to draw her away from the madness. "Lily!" she heard Sirius saying, trying to get her attention. His hand was on her shoulder, "What's wrong?"

She could still hear the screams of the terrified people that fled from her. Lily willed everything around her to stop, and tried desperately to put an end to all the chaos. Suddenly, as if by luck or strength, everything before her faded away and her world went black.

Sirius was quick to act, pulling a mirror from his back pocket. "Prongs!" He shouted into it, relieved when his best mate's face appeared before him. "There's no time to explain. I'm on the astronomy tower and something wrong with Lily. Bring help"

He made no effort to reply, tossing the mirror back on the couch and running off towards the tower, conveniently stopping at Professor McGonagall's office along the way. Together they ascended the large winding staircase to the tower, James taking two steps at a time, while his head of house hustled along behind him. They burst through the door to find Sirius kneeling over an unconscious Lily, trying to wake her up. To his relief, McGonagall was quick to take charge, asking him a series of important questions before drawing her wand. She pressed it to Lily's temple and withdrew a sliver strand, placing it quickly in a flask she had conjured out of thin air. Then, with her wand still on Lily's temple, Professor McGonagall muttered a sleeping charm, ensuring that the safest thing for her at the moment would be rest.

They made quick work of carrying her to the Hospital Wing, where Madame Pomfrey had been quick to get to work. "I must see Professor Dumbledore" McGonagall assured her, and with a nod from the witch, their head of house had disappeared from the wing.

* * *

><p>The gargoyle didn't bother to ask her for the password and was quick to reveal the hidden staircase having seen her urgent expression.<p>

"Better question everyone who comes through here," She warned the statue before fleeing up the stairs. "I have a feeling that were expecting some unwelcome visitors."

"Ah Minerva," Dumbledore said, looking relieved to see her, "I had sent a third year prefect to tell you to meet me here, clearly I had doubted his abilities to find you this quickly."

"Albus," she began, "I'm here on a matter of urgency. Potter and Black altered me a few minutes ago of a decrease in Ms. Evans health. She appeared to enter into a transfixed state and fall unconscious within an extremely short amount of time. She is with Poppy being sustained in a sleeping state where her unconscious mind has been completely shut down. I obtained her memory of the event before putting her to sleep, and figured you might wish to view them."

"Alas, I fear this has developed into a much larger situation than I had imaged." Dumbledore said, confirming McGonagall's assumption that the situation with Lily Evans was the beginning of something more. "I have just received a message from Harold Potter that the ministry is currently under attack. I assume members of the Order will be arriving very shortly, except for of course, Harold and Alastor, who have each made promises to me that they will guard our secrets in the department of mysteries with their lives."

"Why in the world who the Order be coming to Hogwarts?" She demanded, crossing her arms over her chest, "They ought to be in the ministry, defending it from those who seek to destroy it."

"Harold Potter has obviously alerted many of the attack on the ministry, and firmly believes that it is merely a diversion to distract the authorities from the bigger picture. He has sent us reinforcement because he believes that the_ Death Eaters _will be coming to Hogwarts to capture and kill, once and for all, Lily Evans."

Minerva McGonagall's eye drifted out his window, and she noticed that far off in the distance, a dark cloud seemed to be gathering. "We should evacuate the students!" she shouted, "Get them to safety!"

Dumbledore raised his hand to silence, and hopefully, calm the Professor. "We need not take such rash actions. The Death Eaters will not gain entry to the castle tonight."

"And how do we intend to defend them?" she demanded.

"We won't need to defend the castle. They will not attack."

McGonagall appeared shocked at how the Head Master could seem so ignorant. "I'm sorry, Albus." She replied, "But I really don't understand."

"We are going to give them what they have come here for." Dumbledore said, the usual sparkle disappearing completely from his eye. "We are going to give them Lily Evans"


	36. Chapter 36

Dumbledore stood before her, but everything else had appeared to stop moving. The portraits in his office were frozen in their seats, the clock stopped ticking and his phoenix dared not move an inch. "I don't have much time, but what I am going to explain to you now cannot be done once you awake." He began, "I have no frozen time, I am merely altering your dreams to communicate to you that which is of utmost importance. Death Eater's are headed to Hogwarts, for no other reason then to capture you. They've been under the impression that you're a part of the Order of the Phoenix, which is the primary reason why they caught and tortured you before. However, at that time, you didn't have the information they required and allowed you to return to Hogwarts in hopes that they could extract it from you later."

"So that's why they've come" Lily's dream-self answered, "They want to know about the Order. I won't tell them."

"You are going to give them entirely false information, leading them away from Hogwarts, and away from the assumption that Benji Fenwick, and Edgar Bones are a part of the Order. At this point they will most likely ask you about Alastor Moody and Harold Potter, and you must tell them that they are members. The two wizards understand their role and understand that some sacrifices must be made. Once they hear of the information the Death Eaters have been told, they will convince them to release the two younger wizards and that you, having given up the secrets sworn under an unbreakable vow, are dead."

"I understand." Lily said, feeling nervous all of a sudden. "But I just have one question.."

Dumbledore urged her to continue with a wave of his hand, "What will happen to Alastor and Harold?"

"Interesting." He replied, "I assume you'd be curious to know whether or not you would actually die. It appears you know me better than I thought Ms. Evans. I have very little time left to speak with you. We are going to give them your mind, not your physical body. They will be able to touch you as long as you let them, they will see what you want them to. Think of the next few hours as a dream Ms. Evans, everything is entirely under your control."

He began to fade away and she tried desperately once more to get an answer to her previous question, but to no avail.

Her bones suddenly felt heavy, grounding her to the chair she was seated in Dumbledore's office. There were multiple people in his office watching her intently, one of which was James' mother, Clara Potter. The other two men had failed to introduce themselves, but they both looked oddly familiar. Lily watched as Dumbledore pointed his wand in her direction. Initially she had thought that the spell hadn't worked; she didn't feel any different than expected when, all of a sudden she felt the weight of her bones lift and Lily easily rose to her feet, almost as if she had risen up into the air and drifted lightly back down to the ground. She expected the others in the room to be shocked, but they all continued to stare at the chair as if she hadn't moved. Lily turned round to see her physical form still seated, and soon realized that the others in the room couldn't see her. She remembered Dumbledore's clear instruction that she was in complete control of what those around her saw and heard. In her dream state, she could easily cross the line between reality and imagination in each person's brain. No sooner did she wish for Dumbledore to be able to see her, than he winked in her direction.

Lily realized that discovering the Death Eaters whereabouts on the Hogwarts grounds single-handedly would be an extremely hard task. However, as much as she feared their control, she knew that she would have to grant them access to her mind so she could find them. She opened her mind, and allowed what she had unknowingly been suppressing to rise into her brain.

What had usually seemed like a long walk to Lily to the shrieking shack, had been particularly shorter and less tiresome. She watched the building grow larger and larger until she was staring at the front door that hung precariously off its top hinge. She directed her thoughts towards her hand, wishing that it would be solid enough to push the door open. To her relief, she grasped the doors jagged edge and push it open enough for her to squeeze through. She made her way up the narrow steps towards the main room, where she knew they would be waiting.

She slipped past two Death Eaters who stood in her way on the steps, having wished they wouldn't see her. She made herself visible on the landing just outside the main sitting room. The room, having been filled with eager twittering, fell silent the moment she entered. She held her head up high and faced the woman that had tortured her a few months prior.

"Ah ha!" Screeched Bellatrix, stepping forward to address the other ten followers in the room, "Dark witches and wizards, may I formally introduce Ms. Lily Evans, mudblood and trusted member of the Order of the Pheonix. Fear not, her mind is mine; she is under my complete control."

Someone in the back of the room demanded that Bellatrix prove her power over the young witch. Bellatrix pulled the wizard who dared question her to the front of the room to make an example of him. "Kill him." She hissed, and Lily obediently drew her wand.

She took a deep breath, and made all the people see what Bellatrix wanted. To them, Lily had drawn her wand with ease and cast the killing curse as if she had done so many times before. The wizard, having not put up a fight, fell to the ground and the others in the room appeared extremely impressed. "We have not only met here tonight to gain information from Lily Evans, but to also gain access into Hogwarts once and for all."

"Now tell us girl!" Bellatrix commanded, "Where are your parents?"

"Gone" Lily replied, staring straight ahead to give the impression that she was under a trance, "You murdered them."

"Right I did." She continued, "And who will miss you when we kill you?"

"No one"

"Precisely." The fellow Death Eaters laughed at Lily, and Bellatrix quickly silenced them with a raise of her hand. "Now tell us everything you know about the Order of the Phoenix and their plans to take down the Dark Lord."

Lily told them exactly what she wanted to hear, having seen the answers in Bellatrix's mind. She directed them away from Hogwarts, telling them that their Headquarters was located in an abandoned house in the outskirts of London, and that all of the secrete passages into the castle had been sealed by Dumbledore himself so passing through them would be an impossible task. She answered all of Bellatrix's questions, even giving up the names of Alastor Moody and Harold Potter.

"What about the Fenwick and the Bones boys?" Bellatrix demanded, "Are they not a part of the Order?"

"No." Lily replied, "The Order is only composed of four people, one of which you have under your control."

"Three of which." Bellatrix corrected Lily, "We've recently captured Alastor Moody and Harold Potter, who came blame you for their deaths."

Lily felt her legs give in, and quickly went tumbling to the ground. "What is going on?" Bellatrix demanded, "Get up on your feet, girl!"

As much as she would've liked to continue their conversation, Lily couldn't stand. She knew that she had, at this point, broken her unbreakable vow and that the consequences were in effect. "I'm dying." Lily answered truthfully for the first time that evening, "I've broken the trust of my fellow members, and must pay the ultimate price."

Bellatrix was worried, having not thought Dumbledore would be capable of such magic. The majority of their plans were relying on the information they would collect from Lily Evans, but she was dying in front of her before she could get the answers she needed.

"No!" She cried in desperation, "The Dark Lord still requires answers!"

Lily smiled, knowing that she had won, and lay back onto the floor. Bellatrix was at her side in seconds, holding her head up off the floor. Lily had the perfect view of the woman above her, eyes so full of fear Lily almost felt sorry for her. The others in the room began to disaparate, realizing that their presence no longer had a purpose; that the show would soon be over.

"Forget you!" Bellatrix shouted at their disappearing figures, getting to her feet and waving her wand at the empty room, "You'll regret this! Forget you, forget all of you!"

And with her echoing words, the answer to her increasing problem suddenly became clear. She fingered her wand and knelt once again at Lily's side. "You're time is quickly running out, but luckily I don't need you to _tell _me the things I need."

Lily wished to die before she could get what she wanted, but it was too late, Bellatrix had already begun, "You're memories will do, now won't they?"

Unfortunately, Lily had no control over her past memories. Bellatrix would have access to everything, including her instruction from Dumbledore and the faces of the other Order members etched in her brain. Lily could feel her heart slowing and knew she only had a matter of minutes left.

Bellatrix extracted her memories and place them in a vile. Lily drew her attention to the corridor, distracting her with the sounds of approaching footsteps. She made herself invisible once more and conjured another vile and extracted her memories once more. She quickly altered them, changing her past to correspond with the information she revealed to Bellatrix that evening.

Lily got to her feet and cleared her throat. "Dear Bellatlrix," she said, holding up the second vile "It seems that even when you think you've won, you've lost"

Bellatrix search her cloaks pockets and discovered that the vile must have fallen out of her pockets. "Oh please," she countered, "You've got seconds left, and when you go I'll have no problem prying that vile from your cold hands."

"You won't get that chance" Lily replied, but Bellatrix, as a means to stop her from aparating away, stepped forward and grabbed hold of her. Distracted in getting the second vile from her hands, Bellatrix failed to notice Lily slip her hand into the pocket of her cloak and retrieve the real memories. Bellatrix managed to snatch the vile from her hands, and with an echoing series of violent laughter, she aparated away leaving Lily to die alone.

Lily smiled down at the vile in her hands, throwing it to the ground and watching in relief as her memories floated around her. She fell to the ground, smiling as the black clouds formed figures, jumping and dancing, allowing Lily to relive her best memories in her final moments. And with a final breath of cold, fresh air, Lily's world faded to black.

* * *

><p>"Albus!" Professor McGonagall said, her hand on Lily's as they waited in the office for her to awake. "She's gone cold."<p>

Dumbledore said nothing, instead letting the scene before him unfold.

"We were sent here to protect her" mumbled Fabian, "Harold Potter asked us specifically to find and protect her."

"What will her parents think?" Gideon asked, "We'll have to let them know shortly."

"No need," said Clara Potter, who had remained silent since her arrival at the castle. Tears were streaming down her cheeks, and she wanted nothing more than to hold her own son in that very moment.

The hourglass that Dumbledore had turned over when Lily left had officially run out. He knew that she would be dead by now, and her mind would be in the process of searching for her physical form. "Please" Albus said, raising both his hands, "Much similar to a dream, Ms. Evans will simply awaken in reality once more when killed."

"Albus" Professor McGonagall reasoned, "We understand the magic, but sometimes it fails. If the Death Eaters knew what Lily Evans was doing there are ways they could've ended her for once and all. We can only seek to understand their type of dark magic, but you and I know that they are capable of much more because they have no limits."

The room grew quite the sun peaking over the horizon. They had all begun to except the worst when the first morning sunlight shone in the Head Masters office, and breathed new life into Lily's physical form. She sat up hurriedly, coughing and gasping for air.

Clara was at her side almost instantly, holding her in her arms and rubbing her back until reality sunk in once more. "Everything is alright, my dear. You're safe now, back in Dumbledore's office." She whispered, as Lily relaxed into her embrace.

Dumbledore walked around his desk and knelt down before Lily. "We understand you've been through a lot." He began, and McGonagall made to protest insisting that this was hardly the time, but Dumbledore continued, "I am fully inclined to let you rest, but first, it is of utmost importance that you tell us whether you were successful."

"I was" Lily managed, "But she has hold of my memories. I altered them to correspond with our story, but they might be able to tell."

Dumbledore smiled, "Lily Evans, you have acted far beyond any expectations I had. You have single-handedly saved the school, and I am forever grateful for you." He returned to his feet, "Now off to bed. Sleep until you're rested. Do not worry about any of your classes, I'm sure you're well ahead in them anyway."

"The rest of you" he addressed the others, "There are matters at hand that we must discuss."

"Sir" requested Fabian, "I'd like to escort Ms. Lily Evans back to her dormitory."

"Of course, of course" He replied, "Take your brother with you, to be safe, and we will fill you in when you both return."

The two Prewett brothers nodded and, taking Lily each by an arm, they led her from the Head Masters office.

* * *

><p>Lily was exhausted, now safe within the boundaries of the castle once more, she walked with the support of the Prewett brothers, back to her dormitory content to sleep through her morning classes the following day. Lily tried desperately to calm her mind but couldn't help thinking about the Auror members still trapped inside the ministry. She secretly hoped that she could avoid James for the next few hours, knowing that he deserved to know where his father was but knew that there would be grave consequences to sharing with him the reason of his whereabouts. She bid the two brothers a goodnight, and tiptoed in through the portrait hole.<p>

Lily wasn't surprised to see James seated on the sofa, arms crossed, waiting for her. She heaved a great sigh, and wished that this would go quickly. "Who were you talking to?" James asked.

"When?" Lily replied,

"Just then." James said, "Out in the halls. I heard you taking to someone"

"No one"

James sighed, and got to his feet. "Amos?" he demanded, "Really Lily? How many times are you going to make that mistake?"

"James, why are you awake?" she asked, changing the topic of conversation from her ex-boyfriend which only seemed to reinforce his assumptions.

"I went to see Madame Pomfrey today," James started, and right away Lily knew that she wasn't going to enjoy the answer. When it came to her health, James was always unpredictable. "Originally, I was there to visit with you, but much to my surprise she said you weren't there."

Lily made no effort to explain.

"Now, obviously I would be concerned by this. You had collapsed a few hours prior, and with your recent history, I assumed she would keep you in the Hospital Wing. I, of course, asked where you were and she said that Dumbledore had collected you in the early hours of the morning and she told me that you were not to be disturbed. Now, I'm a fan of Dumbledore, but I doubt he would be too proud of his favourite student if he knew what she was really up to all those nights on the astronomy tower."

"James, I'm not.."

"Smoking?" He interrupted, "Bullocks."

"I was going to say Dumbledore's favourite student. He's well aware of my flaws"

James continued as if not having heard her. "For the sake of Merlin, Lily. How could you be so stupid? For bloody sake, it doesn't matter if the Death Eaters get you at this point does it because your disgusting habit is going to kill you anyway."

Lily, having spent the majority of the past day in a nearly dead state, was happy that her bones felt heavy once more. She was exhausted, and listening to another one of James' lectures was something she wasn't entirely pleased to have to do. He had just finished listing the reasons why she was going to end up killing herself before the Death Eaters even had a chance —which was quite insensitive— when Lily finally understood what this argument was truly about.

"Why are you telling me all this right now, James?" Lily interrupted, keeping her voice steady, "You've known about my smoking for months and you're bringing it up now?"

"I—well—yes" James managed, dropping his gaze momentarily from hers.

"I'm not perfect, James" Lily stated,

"I'm well aware you're not perfect, Lily." He replied, "But, this is just something I can't tolerate."

"Anymore?" Lily inquired, but he pretended not to hear her.

"I can't wait around forever." James continued, "At some point I'm going to have to get one with my own life. I do have other options."

"Yeah, I know all about your other options."

"So you're an expert now?"

"Well, if we're talking about repeating mistakes you and Jessica getting back together would fit right into that spectrum." She replied, desperately wishing that James would just leave her alone.

"Mistake?" He demanded, "I never considered dating her as a mistake. She made me happy, Lily. Something that you have never managed to do. Merlin, I've been running after you for years and you've done nothing but cause me trouble. I guess I'm just done waiting. I don't want to be with someone who constantly lies to me, who cares for no one but herself"

"Stop it"

He continued despite her demands "She doesn't make me do all these grand things for her with no reward; She doesn't put herself in constant danger for no reason other than to hurt those closest to her; She doesn't abandon all of her responsibilities because she's afraid; She doesn't give up either. She doesn't manipulate her friends and her family into believing—"

"STOP!" Lily screamed, surprised at her own outburst, "I'm not going to stand here anymore and listen to this." She continued calmly. "Have you ever considered that I'm not the problem here, James? Sure, I've done some pretty selfish things this year; I'm sure you didn't appreciate me running away and all that. But I've changed, James, I'm not the person you described and I'm not the person you used to like. Truthfully, you don't know me at all anymore."

"That's not—"

"I'm going to bed, James." Lily interjected.

He frowned, "What? In the middle of our conversation?"

Lily made her way over to the staircase that led to her bedroom, "I've had an extremely long day," she added over her shoulder, "Not that you bothered to ask."

All her thoughts of guilt, having been hard on James even though she knew what horrors tomorrow would bring for him, disappeared as soon as her head hit the pillow. _He would be fine. _She thought to herself, _Harold Potter was put on Ministry duty for a reason. They would surely be seeing him again. _


	37. Chapter 37

James Potter was lucky enough to grow up with the undivided attention and unconditional love of both his parents. He was everything they could have ever hoped for and with their consistent troubles with conception, James Potter was their miracle. As a baby the two of them never left his side, each of them so incredibly interested in everything he had to offer, even at such a young age. They loved him completely, and as he grew older and saw their relationship as a perfect example of marriage, he decided that he would love his wife in the same way. James Potter had no idea what a fairytale was, and grew up instead on the story of his parents. The heroin journey of how they fought off the intentions of everyone else until they found each other. He promised himself he would do the same. He would never give up once he found love because they never stopped trying.

They met at Hogwarts and were familiar with each other through the first few years of school having been sorted into the same house. But it wasn't until their fifth year that they really began to notice each other. Harold Potter was determined to make captain of the Quidditch team and devoted every moment of his time to practicing. While Clara Rabnott tried her hardest to pull off admirable grades but they usually suffered due to her clumsiness and forgetfulness. Neither was necessarily interested in meeting the other, but Harold Potter maintained the best marks in his grade and was her best hope in being accepted into the Auror academy. She begged him to help her study and he reluctantly spent time he would've otherwise used to practice Quidditch to help her. Her grades improved as they spent more time together, but Harold began to feel more towards her. Within months he knew that she was the one for him, and he spent the rest of their days at Hogwarts convincing her of the same. By sixth year they were officially together, and stayed that way for the rest of their lives. Their relationship was prone to hit multiple rough patches, although they failed to release those specific events to their son. He saw their relationship as perfect, which is exactly where he went wrong because nothing is ever perfect.

James' first impression of Lily had definitely not been a good one. He had always been naturally smart — and in his opinion the smartest kid around — but during their first week at Hogwarts Lily out shown him in everything they did. She was the first to levitate a feather in charms and the first to transfigure her owl into a glass, and her constant need to be the best infuriated him. But the worst part wasn't that she was just smart, everyone seemed to think she was incredibly nice and selfless. She helped the kids that struggled in their studies with their homework, and aside from spending the majority of her time in the library seemed to have countless friends. Even Remus, one of his closest friends, chose to spend time with her over him. James knew he was jealous of her, and hated her for making him feel that way.

_"Eventually_," Sirius would tell him, "_all of it will go to her head and she'll be arrogant and no one will like her." _

_"But everyone else seems to think otherwise..." James argued, "Well, everyone except for that greasy-haired slyterin that follows her around" _

_"Honestly," Sirius agreed, "He's more jealous than you are which, if it wasn't so pathetic, would be pretty impressive"_

Neither of the Marauders were very cautious about what they said in public and before they knew it they had managed to spread numerous rumours about that Snivellus kid's love for Lily Evans. However, the two love-birds quickly tracked down the origin of the rumours and tried very hard to convince the Marauders to correct their wrong-doings, but neither James or Sirius would comply. The incident sparked a general hatred between the pairings, which they didn't do a good job of concealing from the rest of the school. Lily and Severus were constantly trying to embarrass James and Sirius in class by out-smarting them, while Sirius and James came up with elaborate pranks to get back at them.

In second year, Sirius, Remus and Peter came to James with a slight concern.

_"You seem to be a little obsessed with inflicting pain on this Snivellus person" Remus began, "I think we're just worried that this has developed into something else entirely."_

_"And what is that?" James demanded, crossing his arms over his chest._

_The three others shared a nervous glance, and Sirius hesitantly sat down beside James on his bed, "We just don't want you to be pranking him because your jealous of him or something. I mean, he and Lily are pretty good friends and it just seems like he's got what you want." _

_James fell silent and the others continued, "If this is all for fun and games, we're totally on board" Peter continued, ignoring Remus' mumblings about not being _totally_ on board no matter the reason, "But we don't want you to get mixed up in something more complicated" _

_"We're just looking out for you" Sirius added_

James cleared his throat and changed the subject, never truly giving them a real answer. Of course he was jealous of the relationship that Snape had with Lily, but not because he was interested in her romantically. His mind kept wandering back to their first week at Hogwarts and the urge he felt to out shine her, to better himself to finally beat her. He wanted to be her friend so they could work together and learn from each other, and become better wizards in the long run. He wanted to be her friend because she was incredibly kind and encouraging — he wanted to be the best and she was the ticket to getting there.

So, when some fourth years were making fun of her during breakfast one morning he came to her defense. Everything that they were saying was wrong about her and it infuriated him. James watched from down the table as the forth years rambled on and Lily's face grew sadder with every passing word. And he tried to stay out of it, knowing that she would want him to, but in the end she was important to him and he wasn't going to let a bunch of stupid forth years walk all over her. So, James pushed himself up out of his chair, marched right over to them and gave them a piece of his mind. The colour returned to Lily's face and James thought he could see her smiling. James thought that they would be friends after that morning, at least until the forth years turned around and claimed that the only reason he would come to her defense was because he was in love with her.

The rumours spread faster than the ones he had started about Snape two years before hand, and everything was different. She didn't challenge him in class anymore, and no longer held her ground when he confronted her. But James didn't want anything to change so he kept going after her, and at one point even used his fake crush against her in an attempt to return things to normal. It was then they fell into a routine of James asking Lily to go out with him and her brutally turning him down. They both knew the other one was kidding and that neither liked each other beyond their present state.

During forth year Sirius, Remus and Peter approached him again with their concerns.

_"We just want to make sure that you're really just joking around with her" Sirius began, because he always took the lead when it came to Lily. _

_Remus had become more of his friend and was usually not far behind Sirius, "It's just, we're worried that you're actually hoping she'll go out with you, but the only reason she still puts up with the charade is because she knows that you're not serious."_

_"We think it's nice that you've grown to like her" Sirius continued, "We just don't want to see you getting hurt."_

Once again James changed the subject, never actually given them an answer. But as fifth year rolled around and James hatred for Snape grew stronger, the other Marauders were able to answer their own questions about how he felt. James' pranks got worse and the others followed him to try to protect him. They were thankful by the end of fifth year, thinking that they had protected James from Lily, until the incident following their Ordinary Wizarding Levels. He had pulled his wand on Snape and was levitating him by the ankles when a furious Lily demand that he stop. James nervously ran a hand through his hair and asked her to go out with him again. Sirius would tell you that he heard sincerity in James' voice for the first time ever, but to Lily it was just another question. James was being a prick, but he was definitely hoping that she would agree.

She broke his heart, and he broke a couple of Snape's ribs. James had come to except his feelings for Lily, but she was still interested in playing the game. It was only until after Sirius had almost gotten Snape killed by introducing him to a werewolf, did James finally realize that everything he was doing to Snape was inappropriate and completely unfair. By the beginning of sixth year, the Marauder's had stopped picking on Snape. They focused their attention on their studies and on silly competitions they had over other girls in the school. It was clear to the other Marauder's that Lily had completely broken James — she had stepped on his heart too many times for it to ever fully heal properly. Sirius tried to distract James with the countless other girls that found him incredibly attractive and could loved him completely, but he wasn't ever serious with any of them. The Marauder's constantly tried to remind James that any other girl was better than Lily could ever be because they would truly love him for who he was. James ended sixth year feeling hollow inside.

When seventh year rolled around and James discovered that he would be Head Boy alongside the girl of his dreams, he decided that he would take the opportunity to develop their friendship. Suddenly when he met Jessica, everything seemed to fall into place: Lily and him and become great friends and he had finally met someone that made him feel whole again. Jessica adored James for who he was but couldn't help but feel jealous by the relationship he had with Lily. She cheated on him multiple times by means of getting back at him for treating her as the runner up in the race for his heart. James was always comparing her to Lily and he deserved to feel as badly as she did. Her jealousy made her hurt him, just like his had compelled him to punish Snape years before.

Over the Christmas break, after a brutal ending with Jessica, his emptiness returned. And upon Lily's return he noticed a familiar emotion in her. He selflessly opened up his home to her and hoped that she would find the love she needed in his household. From that moment on they were on good terms, she didn't hate him anymore but James was beginning to learn that Lily never stayed. She constantly retreated into herself as protection from him and every time they got close, it all slipped away. James soon accepted that she wasn't going to be able to ever love him — his past self had done too much damage. So, when an apologetic Jessica walked back into his life, he was prepared to welcome her with open arms.

But his plans crumbled with the rest of his world when his dad went missing.

The news of the infiltration at the ministry had spread quickly around the wizarding world, and for the first few days the entire nation was in a state of panic. Loved ones were missing or dead, and people were still being held captive and tortured inside a place that only sought to bring the wizarding community success. The Marauder's leaned on each other, having all been extremely close with James' father.

"He's going to be alright" Remus reasoned, mostly to himself, "Don't you think?"

No one responded. And even though James knew that he should be thinking about his dad and hoping that he gets out of the mess he's gotten himself in, he wasn't. His dad always knew what he was getting into — there's no way he didn't consider being captured as an possible outcome. James was thinking about Lily, and everything she must be feeling. She just recently lost her parents, and to his fault found parental figures once more in his parents, and now one of them was missing presumed dead. She just went through this, and now was forced to go through it all again.

The wind bellowed through the Astronomy tower and sent shivers down their spines. Sirius had tried desperately to get Lily to come and talk with James, but she constantly refused. He got that she was trying to distance herself from the situation to avoid thinking about her own dead parents, but he was still angry with her selfishness. James checked his watch and figured Lily would have retreated to their head's common room by now.

"I think I'm going to go to my common room" James whispered, "I just want to be alone for a bit"

Sirius and Remus were extremely determined to find Lily and force her to speak to James — to help him through — so after James had very clearly left the astronomy tower they dashed through the castle. Sirius went straight to the spots he would assume Lily would be, and Remus quickly stopped at their dormitory and checked the Marauders map. He spotted her walking towards Dumbledore's office and decided to grab Sirius and head there together.

* * *

><p>Lily knocked twice on the Head Master's door before pushing it open. The office appeared to be empty and she had nearly retreated from the room when he emerged from behind his desk. He offered her a seat, but she remained standing. Lily shuffled nervously for a few seconds before finding her courage. "I know that you just think I'm too young and don't have very much to offer to this Order of the Pheonix or whatever, but I need to do something. You have to let me leave and help in anyway I can. I remember what you told me yesterday about it being too dangerous, and about how Harold Potter and Alastor Moody knew exactly what they were getting in to at the ministry. But I can't just sit around anymore, Sir. I need to do something. Please" Lily pleaded, "You don't understand"<p>

"Then help me understand, Ms. Evans." Dumbledore said calmly, extending the offer for her to sit once more.

"My parents were murdered by these horrible people and I didn't do anything about it. It was all my fault really. I couldn't save them. I should have protected them, but I didn't. And the Potter's were so incredibly kind to me when I was going through that, and now their in danger. It's my fault again, Professor. Harold Potter is going to die because of me — because he knew me. But it's different this time because I can help him, I can save him."

"Ms. Evans," Dumbledore began, transfiguring a cup of tea on the desk before her, "Harold and Clara Potter are not your parents. They are not going to be attacked and killed by surprise by complete strangers because they fully expect to die at every possible moment. The Potter's have faced death multiple times, and welcome it every single time but it never seems to come. Your parents didn't seem it coming and were prepared to defend themselves. That is not your fault. They didn't need protection because they shouldn't have died. I regret their deaths truly because they did nothing to deserve them. On the other hand, the Potters do much to deserve death, they have made numerous enemies. And yet, they never die, for the sole reason that they have come to terms with the very idea that any spell they cast in battle could be there very last. Harold Potter is not going to die in the ministry of magic, and if he does you'll know that it'll have been like coming home to him. He would've welcomed death with every fiber of his being."

Lily was crying at the very idea of Harold Potter's death. "I'm afraid," Lily sniffed, "I don't truly understand what you mean because the very idea of dying frightens me."

Dumbledore smiled, "You've only come to witness death as an enemy, Ms, Evans. But believe me when I say it, at some point in the future you will meet with death once more, although this time you'll see it as a friend."

"Please Headmaster" Lily tried, "I need to do something. I need to help."

Dumbledore stood from his desk and came around to stand face to face with her, "I can't let you go, I'm afraid. I want to, but the only place that is safe right now is Hogwarts. Just think about how Harold Potter would react if he learned that I let you leave with the world in such a state — he would likely demand my head."

"There's n-nothing you can do? Nothing at all?" Lily tried, keeping her voice as steady as possible through her tears.

Dumbledore's eyes drifted from her to the door behind him, "It appears we are no longer alone, Ms, Evans." He said, waving his wand causing the door to swing forward and reveal two Marauders standing behind it.

Lily quickly wiped tears from her eyes and quickly shouldered past the two Marauders, putting as much distance as she could between the Headmaster's office and herself as fast as she could.

"She just a girl" Dumbledore said to the two Marauders who appeared distracted, "She's seen things neither of you have and experienced things none of you should have, but that doesn't make her more or less brilliant than she already was."

"Sorry Headmaster," Sirius begun, "But I don't really understand what you're getting at"

He cleared his throat and got to his feet, "She's just a girl." He repeated and disappeared into the room behind his desk.

They retreated from the room, the door closing automatically behind them. "Bonkers" Sirius noted, "He's gone absolutely mad, hasn't he?"

Remus was shaking his head, but let a few moments pass before offering an explanation. "I'm pretty sure he just told us to back off from Lily. She's got her own problems to deal with."

"Well, why hasn't she come to anyone with any of these so called problems, then?" Sirius demanded, "Surely we can help."

"I think that's the point actually. Lily understands that the only person that can truly solve her problems his herself — an understanding that we should probably be applying to James' situation."

* * *

><p>Lily pushed the through the portrait hole and made her way up the stairs towards her bedroom, stopping only briefly outside James' bedroom door. She lifted her hand to the door knob and rested it there. <em>He would want to be alone, <em>she thought_. _Yet, she wanted to be with him and offer nothing to him except her presence. Everyone wanted answers from her, but she didn't have any. James would have to figure this out for himself while she got her own affairs in order. She dropped her hand from the knob and turned towards her own bedroom.

She nudged open her door and walked slowly over towards her bed, pulling off articles of her heavy Hogwarts uniform and tossing them haphazardly on the ground. Lily hadn't realized that she felt like she was suffocating until she ripped all the constricting articles of clothing off of her body. The moon shown brightly through the window and she drew the curtains shut. There was something to be said about complete darkness. It calmed her and allowed her to disappear completely from the present. Lily passed her dresser and pulled out one of her dads old t-shirts, slipping it over her underwear. It still smelled like him and she felt like missing her parents that night. She released her feelings of regret and choice to remember and miss them instead. Lily sat down on the edge of her bed and with three deep breaths collapsed into the comfort of her bedsheets.

She lay motionless for a moment, allowing the darkness to take hold of her. She sank into the mattress beneath her and relaxed into her surroundings. The bedsheets rustled to her left and the lump that she had seen on the opposite side of her bed rolled over to greet her. She happily let him wrap his arms around her, and she settled into him. "My world has gone to shit" James whispered, pulling her closer towards him as he did so.

"That feeling never fades" Lily told him.

They fell asleep within seconds and for the first time in a long time slept all through the night.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Harold Potter stumbled forward and into the light. He squinted and smiled in the dim light of a new day. He was grateful to once again feel the cold wind against his skin and figured that spring was right around the corner. He walked slowly out into the street, catching a small glimpse of himself in a store window and realizing that he wasn't himself. He had nearly forgotten the previous few nights, inhaling multiple potion — one of which was a rather awful batch of polyjuice potion — and having to undergo numerous interrogations under dark magic. But the horrors of the past were wiped from his mind when he thought of seeing his wife and son again.<p>

In his same reflection he saw the Ministry of Magic towering behind him and his smile faded._ Never again will the wizarding community ever be free from the_ _dark magic that overpowered those walls, _Harold thought out loud, _but we'll continue on with hope that one day it might be. _Harold Potter walked through the street, wandless and exposed, but happy that he got to see the sun rise another day. He continued in the direction of his home, unsure if anyone would be there.

The world was surely different now. Destruction and terror had gone door to door and left threatening letters in everyone's mail box. No longer could anyone in the wizarding world ignore the issues at hand — the approaching danger. There was going to be a war. A deadly war that will kill a ton of innocent people, but it would be worth it in the end. _It would have to be, _Harold argued.

He kept moving forward, unsure of the past and the future before him. The only thing Harold Potter knew for sure in that moment was he was still alive, and that was enough.


End file.
